Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

Ryland Grace expected a lot of things to change when he decided to go back to Blip-A and save Rocky, but he had no idea things would get this complicated. Namely, this emotionally involved.

Grace and Rocky spent a considerable amount of time preparing to get back to Rocky’s home planet— calculating how much fuel they still had between the two of them after the Taumobea leeching astrophage was hard enough. They briefly thought they’d die in space together before revising their math and realizing that they would have enough fuel, all of it originating from the Hail Mary. Blip-A’s astrophage was almost entirely eaten up, not to mention the radiation exposure inside of the massive space craft posing a risk to his and Rocky’s health. It took another long while to come to terms with that fact, and Grace was extremely sympathetic. He waited and consoled Rocky through the process of realizing that he’d have to leave his fallen crew alone in space.

Grace found it hard to believe that that instance hadn’t been one of the hardest, if not the hardest moment in Rocky’s time in space. The Eridians had been up there much longer than he had, they had been up here since before Grace was even born. Rocky wasn’t like him, either, aside from shared intelligence and their somewhat similar likes and dislikes. With the Eridain culture of watching others sleep, and their prolonged sleep periods to heal, Rocky had to have spent a considerable amount of his years alone watching his crewmates, compared to Grace simply waking up from a coma to spend a short period with his fallen comrades. Grace knew that if he was an Eridian, he probably would’ve died from radiation sickness from sitting within the group waiting for them to wake up. The idea of having such a close-knit group of highly intelligent peers, only to lose them all… Grace could only imagine how alone Rocky felt. How leaving behind the bodies of his crew would affect him. However, within about 6 months of them finally setting out for Erid, Grace came to know that Rocky wasn’t nearly as worried about the situation on Blip-A as he had been about Grace.

The issue of food became glaringly obvious at that point. Grace had done the calculations on his rationing, and he knew he would survive getting to Erid especially after figuring out that he could eat a horrible tasting Taumobea slurry for extra calories. He had underestimated the effects it would have on his body, though. His weight began to drop off quickly. He was already leaner than he had ever been on earth after being in a coma and in space for as long as he had been, but, he was starting to notice his own bones outlined on his skin during his time changing or in the shower. His gums were receding, not to mention bleeding from the total lack of vitamins. He had supplements to take for that kind of thing, but they ran out on his “trip back to earth” that lasted about three months. Grace put any worry about it in the back of his mind. Three years of rationing wouldn’t be so bad. He didn’t mind losing weight or developing some minor scurvy while he and Rocky rocketed towards home. A place where Grace would actually feel at home, hopefully.

Rocky, however, seemed to have that worry at the front of his mind, or whatever organ he had that constituted one. The relationship the alien and Grace had was one that was already pretty close, this being especially true in Rocky’s case. From what he had told Grace, Eridians were not nearly as touchy or emotionally vulnerable as Grace had been the entire time they knew each other. This was hilarious to Grace, who repeated his insistence he was still keeping walls up. All it took though was Rocky reminding him how leaky Grace got finding out Rocky was alive after he had saved his life (To which Grace protested, insisting anyone would have cried!) and how leaky he got when they reunited. How nauseous Grace got when they did complex flight maneuvers. The fact he had been so easily burned by touching Rocky. After finishing the examples Grace knew about, Rocky added on what Grace would never forget.

”Portable thinking machine gives Rocky information on human body. How sensitive human body is to change. How human body… ceases function when hungry. Rocky worried Grace die before Grace and Rocky get home. Rocky will be taking over Grace’s rationing. Rocky fix.”

Grace initially of course denied Rocky’s request, but, he felt the words bounce in his head for days. He hadn’t let himself cease his insistent positivity since he and Rocky had been reunited. He felt scared, of course he did, but he also knew he had done just about everything he felt he had wanted to do at this point. He felt like if he died on the way to Erid, Rocky could use the Hail Mary to get home and he’d be at peace with that. If anything his only worry would be Rocky trying to learn controls, or trying to modify the atmosphere simulation systems on the ship to mimic his own. What confused him more was Rocky worrying about him like that. He’d be lying if he said he didn’t like the idea— Ryland Grace had never been one for leadership. All these big, hard choices on the Hail Mary had him exhausted, especially the choice to start rationing and deliberately choke down a thick textured Taumobea slurry. He pretended honestly that Stratt had told him to do it in his head in order to make himself follow the instructions. All this to say, the insistence Rocky had to take control of it for him was incredibly tempting. Not to mention, for whatever reason, the idea that Rocky was thinking about him to the point of researching how to… care for him, in a way, was making his head spin.

It took weeks of thinking about that interaction for it to happen again. Grace found his stomach irritated by being empty, and combined with the lingering Taumobea taste in his mouth, he had begun vomiting regularly. This was concerning for him, but for Rocky, it seemed downright terrifying. He had been throwing up like this mostly while Rocky slept for a while, not purposefully, it just happened to be when he tried to eat the most often. Rocky woke to hear Grace’s wretching into a bucket and made a series of distressed sounds Grace had never heard him make before— sounds that made his hair stand on end and goosebumps cover his body.

”Rocky, R-hic-Rocky, buddy, I’m ok. I’m alright, please, it’s ok.” Grace found himself reassuring the alien, finding his stomach turning even more hearing him in that much distress.

”Grace dying. Grace expelling food! This bad! Grace already starving. Grace is Rocky’s ♫♬♪♩♩. Grace let Rocky fix, statement.” Rocky protested, steam coming out of the vents on top of his carapace.

Grace blinked. He had never seen this side of Rocky. He had seen the Eridian be demanding, he would honestly say that was one of Rocky’s primary traits, but he had never demanded control over Grace in this sort of way. It gave Grace a nervous, excited sort of feeling, one he didn’t know what to do with. He decided that Rocky calling him whatever-that-word meant had to be tabled for now, because it was making him feel very odd. Rocky had only ever called him his human, or his friend, things they had translations for. This was new. Grace had frankly had enough of new at this current moment. He had blinked at Rocky and spoke bluntly.

”Buddy, I appreciate it, I really do, but you’ve done a bit of research on human nutrition. I really worry that you taking over rationing for me with no sort of gauge on how much you actually know isn’t a good idea.” Grace spoke honestly, since it seemed Rocky had lost his filter too.

At this, Rocky seemed offended. He made a series of angry huffing sounds and clicks, another sentence or expression Grace didn’t have a translation for. He stomped his legs around in a circle and turned his ball around the room. Ryland sat with a bucket between his legs, dumbfounded as he realized he had genuinely seemed to… make Rocky mad?

”Grace think Rocky stupid. Grace think Rocky irresponsible. Why, question?” Rocky finally asks, tone indignant. 

Grace scoffs. “What?! No, not at all, buddy! You’re super smart, and I know you’re very responsible!”

Rocky suddenly stops in his ball and turns his body towards Grace, rolling himself towards him. Grace quickly moves his puke bucket behind him so the ball doesn’t hit it and spills it, only to turn back and see Rocky right up against his side, trying to maneuver even closer. Grace would normally pull back at the sudden intrusion, but he was both too tired and too curious to do so.

”You’re acting weird, Rocky.” Grace managed, searching for Eridian body language. He wasn’t budging, and Grace felt his chest twist. He sighed. “If… if you feel that strongly about it, tell me your plan.” He relented.

Rocky huffed again. “Prove that Rocky not stupid. Show Grace Rocky can feed him, statement.” 

Grace involuntarily rolled his eyes. Who knew aliens could be so dramatic? “Be more specific buddy. I don’t speak passive aggressive.”

Rocky chirped in confusion. “What mean, question.” He didn’t sound nearly as amused by the new words as he normally was.

Grace hummed. “Means you’re mad at me for something else, and you’re speaking to me in a way that is nice enough to come off normally, but I know you’re trying to be short with me.” Grace couldn’t help the smile that grew on his face when Rocky stomped again in his ball.

”Eridian call this ♬♪♩♫♪.” Rocky said, his voice sounding more meek. “Rocky not mean to do to Grace. Rocky worried.”

Grace slowly felt gears in his brain start to turn. Emotional, messy gears that had long since grown cobwebs and rust for one Ryland Grace. His chest felt warm. Something about this felt like it was pushing a line. He told himself this was just Rocky being worried for his best friend, nothing more.

”That’s ok, bud. I can get mean when I’m worried sometimes too. I’ll ask again though, if you are this worried, can you tell me what you plan to do? You can’t just demand to take over my rationing with no explanation.” Grace explained, sighing. “I-I Kind of have a thing about people making big choices like that for me. I’m not against it, but I want to choose it.” Ryland tried to explain his thinking. 

Rocky vibrated slightly as he considered this. Finally, he seemed to concede. “Grace have equipment that Rocky can make food with.” Rocky blurted out. “Rocky food is protein-based, too. That good for humans. Would not take much to synthesize some combined with Grace’s cells.” 

Ryland stared at Rocky with a somewhat confused expression. “Haven’t we been over this, Bud? Your food is full of metals, from an alien planet, we have no idea what would happen if I ate it. It could poison me.”

A distressed sound came from Rocky before he spoke again. “Rocky know. But Grace rationing could cause death before arrival on Erid. We will monitor any effects. Rocky make sure Grace not die from poison or starvation.”

Grace felt skeptical, of course. He considered that anyone probably would. “So… You want to take some of my cells and cross breed them with your food until we figure out a version that I can eat?” Grace asked, Rocky nodding as he spoke. 

“When we arrive on Erid, Rocky make completely human based meat. Better for Grace. But this is best option now. You already have scurvy.” Rocky huffed, adding playfully. “You are like pirates of carrybeans.” 

Ryland finally laughed after what seemed like one of the most tense conversations he and Rocky had ever had. “I told you, it’s Caribbean. Not Carry Beans.” He thought about the first part of Rocky’s sentence a bit longer. “Wait, so either way, I’m engaging in auto-cannibalism for the rest of my life?”

Rocky chirped, confused. “New word. Explain.”

Ryland tried to think of a delicate way to put this and couldn’t find one. “Means I’m gonna be eating myself till I die.” 

Rocky considered this. His front arm-leg lifted an his hand waved dismissively. “Other option is starve. Dumb question. Do not worry.” Rocky insisted. “You will trust Rocky, yes? Rocky fix. Make sure Grace not starve with plan.”

Ryland sighed. He considered the fact that at that point they had two years and six months left on their ride towards Erid. So, he decided that he agreed with Rocky— other option is starve. Dumb question. His cowardice had developed into some odd sense of bravery over the years he’s spent up here, sure, but he was still plenty scared of death. He still thought making peace was just something you say.

”Alright, Rocky. I’m going to help, though. You at least have to let me check your work before I eat it.” Grace insisted. 

“You take off helmet in tunnel and risk head exploding, but not this, question? You trust Rocky less, question?” Rocky asked, seeming genuinely very sad at the concept. His body tilted down in a pitiful sort of way.

”Oh, Rocky. No. It’s not like that at all.” Grace sighed. “Death from heavy metal poisoning can be super serious, Rocky. My head exploding would’ve been very fast,” Ryland omits adding and would’ve been somewhat preferable to me at the time, “But if I eat bad food and it had… too much mercury for example, I could start to experience hallucinations and paranoia for a long time before it killed me. I don’t want that.”

Rocky grumbled in concern. “Rocky agree. That would be bad.” Rocky rolled his ball against Ryland again.

”It would be, bud.” Ryland agreed, suddenly realizing how close they were and feeling those gears spin in his head again. “Can I ask what made you roll up to me again? You seemed so… mad.” Ryland felt embarrassed at how desperate he realized that sounded. He may as well have blurted out a Do you still like me? Or something.

”Grace's heartrate went up when Rocky upset. Grace too sick, so Rocky calm down.” Rocky said simply. “Rocky take care of Grace, statement.”

Oh, god. What was that feeling that struck Ryland’s heart? He felt dizzy. So dizzy in fact he turned behind him to vomit again. He hated hearing Rocky’s distressed noises start again, but at least it gave him time to continue ignoring whatever was making him feel so odd.

—

Rocky finished synthesizing this prototype food a month and a half later. Grace and him had worked on many different ideas that all ended up testing with high metals and other toxic materials in them, but finally, Rocky achieved a type of food that would be safe for human consumption. Grace was happy that he was not the type of person to stick his nose up at things like GMOs— because this heap of meat within the temperature controlled storage was pretty much entirely a genetically modified organism. Rocky’s food was a darkly colored meat-esque substance, with a hard shell that needed to be cracked open to access the softer meat inside. It got gooey when tenderized, which seemed to be the way Rocky preferred to eat it. The meat Rocky had made for Ryland though had taken on some different qualities. 

The outer shell was still present and dark, but was more dark red than nearly black the way Rocky’s was. The skin, Rocky had insisted, was not suitable for Grace’s consumption as is, but would be after some processing into what would essentially be iron-based vitamin supplements. The inner part of the meat was pink, like uncooked pork or chicken, and smelled like it too. Ryland fired up the small kitchen in the Hail Mary for the first time in years to cook it, as he wasn’t entirely sure if things like salmonella were a factor here. The smell that hit his nose was frankly, divine. Freshly cooked meat that Ryland hadn’t gotten to taste in years. Rocky watched him sit down on the floor next to his Xeonite enclosure with a plate of three portions of meat. 

“Not have to ration. Have as much as you want.” Rocky insisted. “Rocky have five servings.”

”Rocky is 350 pounds and eats every other day,” Ryland hums, cutting a portion of the mystery meat to try and blowing on it to cool it off. “Gosh. I’m a little nervous, Buddy.”

Rocky stomped impatiently. “We run tests. Is safe. Skin is being ground up for supplemental nutrition, too. Why nervous?” Rocky almost frets, tone warbling like he’s going to freak out. 

Ryland quickly put his free hand up in a placating gesture. He understood Rocky’s worry, of course. In the time it had taken to synthesize this meat substitute, he had dropped more weight. He was sleeping more. He brought the fork to his mouth before realizing one more thing, pulling it away and earning another indignant huff of steam from Rocky.

“Isn’t this… weird for you? Watching me eat? I thought it was super private for you.” Ryland asked, confused. 

“You are starving and you worry about things like privacy. Humans are inflexible with their thinking.” Rocky hummed in frustration. “Grace is ♫♬♪♩♩. Eating private, but not for us.” 

That made the feeling Grace had concerning the gears in his head come back. He felt dizzy. But not for us? Grace didn’t have a translation for whatever Rocky had just said, still. He hadn’t heard it since the first time a month and a half ago. Why did he keep jumping to assume the context was anything beyond friendship? Why was he even considering something like that? Ryland Grace put the thought in a box and tried to lock it away, just like he did with most things that involved feelings that made him dizzy.

“New word. Translate?” Grace asked before he knew what he was saying. So much for the box.

“No.” Rocky said curtly. “Grace eat.”

Ryland’s head swam again. Bossy. He felt compelled to do what Rocky said, especially after he put this much work into making him a brand new meat substance to eat. He brought the fork back to his mouth and took a breath, quickly shoving the small bite of the meat into his mouth. He blinked and waited for the taste to process as he chewed, which nearly made him drool. Holy cow, this was incredible. It actually had substance, felt like real food compared to the rations he had been rehydrating. It  was juicy and tender and melted in his mouth, like a high quality cut of steak would, but tasted more like… bacon? Fatty, savory, pork-esque, with a texture like chicken. It was so odd, and the strips of black marbling throughout added an umami type flavor he wasn’t ready for, but nevertheless it was absolutely incredible. Ryland found himself gasping when he swallowed and quickly went to cut himself another bite.

Rocky chirped with delight. He puffed himself up proudly and spun in a circle as Grace shoved mouthful after mouthful of his synthetic meat substitute into his mouth. Grace smiled at the sound, trying to slow down and not look like such a pig— he was well aware that eating this quickly would upset his stomach after it had shrunk from his lack of eating, but he found it hard to care when Rocky seemed pleased to see him enjoying it. 

“Good, Grace!” Rocky purrs, that’s the only word Grace has for it. “Eat slowly, not too much. Rocky is so happy.”

Grace felt his cheeks heat up. He looked up at Rocky with his mouth full and swallowed, trying not to show how embarrassed he felt. He was panting with how quickly he had eaten the first portion on his plate before he could speak again.

”Thank you, Rocky. Thank you. Oh my gosh.” Grace found the words tumbling out of him. He didn’t even realize he had started to cry.

”Grace is leaking!” Rocky gasped. “Is Grace poison? Need help, question?” Rocky asked in a panic, overly concerned.

”N-no, no, it’s ok, I’m just so thankful. I didn’t want to starve to death.” Grace admitted, leaning his forehead close to the Xenonite and resting his head there. “I’m so happy I’ll actually get to go to Erid with you.” 

Rocky stomped in excitement, nodding. “Rocky is happy too. Grace not die. Rocky fix, Rocky will always fix!” Rocky seemed proud of the fact, adding something that rang in Grace’s ears just like his first expression of concern had. “Rocky fix for Grace like Rocky would fix for Adrian.”

Grace did not know what to say, frankly. What on earth— rather, in space— did Rocky mean? He literally couldn’t wrap his brain around that at this current moment. He chose to instead nod in an awkward way, and keep eating. Why’d he nod, did he agree with Rocky? The way Rocky chirps in excitement seems to imply he thinks Grace agrees. Grace was too hungry, too overwhelmed with excitement from not dying of starvation, and too thankful to his best friend to question it any further. He’d have to unpack it later, from the box he had barely managed to put a lid on in his head. 

—

The trip on the Hail Mary dragged on. Grace had been gaining back the weight he had lost in his seven and a half months of rationing living off of the synthetic meat, which boosted his energy and kept him from sleeping all the time like he had been. This also meant that he and Rocky had been spending a lot of time together, though. He didn’t mind this at all, of course. Rocky was his best friend in the whole entire universe, and he actually loved spending time with the Eridian. There isn’t a but to that, but there is… an addendum now.

Things were starting to get odd on the Hail Mary.

The primary concern between the both of them was observing… changes Grace had been experiencing. At this point he had now been eating the new meat substitute for four months, as they were reaching their first year on their journey. Sure, he was gaining weight and his vitamin supplements helped with his bleeding gums and anemia, but that wasn’t all. Grace felt what he assumed to be a fever develop a month into consuming the meat, but it never really went away. At the point they caught it his body temperature seemed to be steadily rising, sitting at around 104 degrees fahrenheit consistently, and it got up to 110 if he exerted himself by moving things on the ship or trying to exercise on the training machine. Rocky and him were monitoring it closely, and the meat was the only explanation they could find, but they didn’t understand what would be causing it. 

Beyond the increased temperature though, as time rolled on and they were nearly halfway to Erid, Grace noticed another development. At that time Grace’s internal body temperature sat at around 150 consistently, drastically rising over the past 6 months since they first noticed his temperature shift. He expected that to have some kind of adverse effect on his brain, considering a normal human would be dead under those conditions, but something was happening to his organs too. They were withstanding and adapting to the heat. He didn’t even feel feverish anymore, he honestly felt stronger than he had in years. Evidenced by the patches of skin around his joints that were developing some kind of eczema. The skin on the tops of his shoulders, his knuckles, and the outsides of his elbows had become rough at first, developing painful cracks the way his skin did on earth in the winter when he forgot to put lotion on them. It extended to his knees, his wrists and ankles, then eventually his finger joints developed it as well.  It made it somewhat harder to move without pain, but the undersides of his joints remained soft, which allowed him to retain most of his mobility. He was so concerned with the borderline arthritis effect this was having on him that he didn’t fully notice how discolored the calloused, cracked skin had become.

Due to his changing biology, him and Rocky’s blurred boundaries had only become further stretched. Rocky barely let Ryland out of his sight since they first noticed the temperature anomaly. This included for private scenarios like before a shower, and was rapidly extending to things like Rocky waiting in the bathroom for Grace to finish showering. Grace wondered how long he was gonna be able to use the toilet in privacy. This was only a problem because Grace hadn’t really explained the concept of Transgenderism to Rocky, and he honestly wondered if seeing Grace’s… anatomy would be confusing for him. The thought of exposing himself in that way plagued him every time he showered, as he was doing now, as Rocky sat just outside the curtain in his ball.

Wait. What? What was he thinking?! That is not the only problem with this situation! He had told Rocky before how private being naked was for humans! Rocky had to know what he was asking, had to know what he was implying— No. That was a ridiculous sentiment. He put that thought out of his brain as he opened the shower curtain enough to grab a towel, feeling Rocky’s ball rock forward incessantly.

”Grace come out. Body exam.” Rocky demanded. 

Grace’s brain short circuited with that. Why was Rocky asking to examine his body? He tried to stay rational, even as his head started to churn with feelings again.

”Rocky, I’m naked. Can’t I at least put on my boxers and my shirt on?” Grace asked, anxiety rising in his voice. He felt like this was a reasonable ask.

”No. Your skin is changing. Temperature higher, too. Rocky examine Grace fully, statement.” Rocky insisted. His tone gave Grace the clear impression he was absolutely not budging on this.

Grace stood in a humid, wet shower and debated what he was going to do. He looked down at his body and cringed. He had come out and started his transition from female to male when he was in his undergrad, and once he started his masters, his identity as Ryland Grace was so cemented that most of his colleagues who had met him prior to his medical and public transition assumed he was an effeminate man to begin with. Ryland felt like he hit the jackpot, having kept his hair short and dressed the way he had his entire life, as it made his transition easier than it could have been for most. It was hard on his family— honestly it was part of why he didn’t speak to them anymore, but he found it hard to care about that part now. The main source of his dysphoria at this point were the small mammary glands he still possessed on his chest, as he had never experienced an incredible amount of bottom dysphoria before. These were all things about his identity that he had to remember during his time on Hail Mary recovering from amnesia, and all of it had been incredibly disorienting, but he was honestly glad a lot of it was still hazy for him. The impression that his transition had been easy was a lot better than whatever the truth may be. 

“Why Grace hesitate?” Rocky asked. “Can see you fully through clothes and walls anyway. What is difference, question?”

Ryland didn’t realize how long he had been thinking. He also didn’t connect the dots that there was a possibility Rocky already knew the shape of his body, even if he had tried to hide it.

”Wh— then why do you need to fully see me?!” Ryland blurts out, embarrassment evident in his voice.

”Best quality image. Cannot touch, so direct image is required.” Rocky said simply. He seemed to have grown a patience for this embarrassment from Grace over the past few months.

Ryland considered the logic there and sighed, asking a question he knew the answer to. “Do you know what my anatomy looks like, then? I mean, compared to your research on human males.” Beating around the bush much?

Rocky was quiet for a moment and chirped in a way that sounded confused. “Grace question not make sense. Human male anatomy and human female anatomy not that different.”

Grace sighed. Of course the genderless mineral based alien would think that. “They are, kinda, though, Rocky… I have anatomy consistent with a human female.”

Rocky made a noise of discomfort. “Grace, this stupid. Anatomy makes no difference. Grace is ♫♬♪♩♩.” 

There it was again. Rocky had called him that word a number of times in the past few months and never translated it. Grace assumed now it must be some term of endearment, he just couldn’t figure out context. 

“You really don’t get human gender at all, do you, Rocky?” Grace asked, feeling significantly less nervous now. “Do you want me to explain at all?” He offered.

Rocky vented steam in a way that expressed his interest, but then made a noise of refusal. “Later. Grace gender concepts human exclusive. Not how Eridian think.” 

Grace almost felt… relieved? He knew some part of him could choose to feel dismissed here. His gender was important to him, but not in the same way it had been when he first came out. As he was nearing his late thirties now he found it to be something he didn’t have to care about as much. This was especially true post amnesia. He got the distinct sense this was not the case on earth, even further reason he didn’t try to remember all that much about it. Instead of dismissal, though, Grace felt reassured. Rocky didn’t care. He had known all along and it never once mattered. He didn’t even ask. Didn’t even seem all that interested in an explanation. It felt like Rocky truly just cared about Grace, because he did.

Grace pulled back the curtain without a second thought. It’s not like he actually had eyes on him, which certainly helped. Rocky studied him with a featureless face, chirping at different frequencies to get multiple views of Ryland. He asked him to turn around, and asked him to show him his joints and the skin that had changed on them closer, right against the xenonite. Rocky huffed in confusion at what it seemed to find.

”That does not make sense.” Rocky said plainly. “Grace cut sample of medium rough texture skin and analyze. Find out make up.”

Grace raised his eyebrows in interest. “Wh— encouraging me to cut off skin is unlike you, bud. You got a theory?” 

Rocky tapped his leg in agreement. “Rocky does. Rocky think food making Grace’s DNA change.”

Grace stared at Rocky and waited for his wind-chime-esque laugh. He waited for several seconds and it did not come. He blinked and looked at his elbows and his hands, the spots where he could see the skin most directly. Patches of rough, thick skin akin to… rock texture. Grace examined it under the light of the magnification mirror in the bathroom and found the coloration to be vaguely… orange-ish? Not like jaundice or simpsons or anything, but like an iron rich sand. Reddish-orange rock textured skin. Increased body temperature to the point any normal human would have died from it. Organs changing to withstand the new internal temperature. Rocky was right, his DNA was changing. He left the next part of that conclusion— what he was becoming— unspoken. At least until he could confirm it with a test.

Ryland swallowed hard and tried not to look as scared as he felt. “Y-yeah. I can see that. Ok. Let me dry off, and uh… we’ll run some tests.” 

Rocky of course didn’t leave him alone even as he dried off and got dressed. When Ryland reached for his binder he decided to forgo it, given he felt so anxious he could pass out and he didn’t feel like he had to wear it around Rocky anymore. He moved into the lab once he put on comfortable clothes, hearing Rocky roll alongside him in silence the entire way. Neither of them spoke as Ryland disinfected the skin on his shoulder and prepared a biopsy sample of it for testing, and stayed silent as Ryland collected a blood sample from himself as well.

Rocky finally broke the silence as he watched Ryland inspecting the samples and running various diagnostic tests. “Anything yet, Grace?”

Grace’s leg bounced as he sat on his chair in front of the computers running tests. “My blood has enough mercury in it to cause all the symptoms I mentioned before— hallucinations, paranoia, disorientation, but… I feel absolutely fine. A normal human would require chelation to clear this amount of heavy metals from their system but I seem to be fine. I actually feel better than I did on earth.” 

“New word. What mean, question?” Rocky asked, referring to Chelation therapy. 

“This amount of mercury would require someone to be filled with chelating agents that could bind with the mercury and help the patient excrete it. But I don’t seem to need that.” Grace explained bluntly. “My skin is still being analyzed but it’s… different too.”

Rocky rolled his ball closer to Grace, holding his crystal up to the screen of the computer. “What is chemical composition of human skin, question?” Rocky asked.

Grace knew where this was going and he didn’t like it one bit. “The majority of the human body is water, fats, and protein. Skin cells that are… thicker, like if my skin was developing more layers, would contain more of the protein keratin in them.” Grace explained, breathing heavily. 

The opposite question hung in the air unsaid, so, Rocky answered it for Grace. “Eridian cells akin to different species. Genetic make up differs greatly. Magnesium, Mercury, Proteins, and Phosphorus…” 

Ryland finally registers that Rocky isn’t just listing off what Eridian skin/carapace cells are made up of, he’s reading off the screen too. Ryland scans the various percentages of the skin sample analysis as they appear on the screen and recognizes this bastardization of human DNA instantly. Water still makes up a majority of his skin, but the sample is unusually high in both keratin and the various substances Rocky listed. An uncomfortably large percentage of unknown appears after the analysis finishes finding what recognizable signatures it can and Grace finds his eyes back on Rocky.

”Not Eridian machine. Not calibrated to find substances only found on Erid, Grace.” Rocky says in a measured tone, like he seems to understand the gravity of this situation. 

There is a very long silence. More results come back as time passes, but Grace doesn’t need to look at them. He slumps back into his chair and stares at his hands, blinking in confusion. This shouldn’t be possible at all. In the slightest, actually. It bordered on magic quite frankly. Eating Eridian based food was turning him into some kind of Eridian-Human hybrid. He tried to make sense of it as his cheeks began to heat up and his head began to spin. The feelings again. He wanted to be upset about this. He was honestly trying to make himself angry. He trusted Rocky to do this for him and it had probably irrevocably changed his DNA. However, for some insane reason, Ryland Grace found himself excited. His heart was pounding, a heart he felt beating stronger than before. He felt like he couldn’t stop vibrating, and without thinking, a rumbling noise came up from his throat as he shivered with anticipation.

Rocky makes the same noise back immediately, mimicking him. Grace turned his head finally to look down at Rocky and stare at him in wonder, both of them remaining silent again for a moment. Grace’s vocal chords were being changed, too? Now Grace’s head was really swimming, as he felt Rocky’s ball hit his leg eagerly over and over. 

“Grace biology change. Grace more like Eridian now. Grace upset question?” Rocky asked, the excitement evident in his voice. Like he was trying not to sound thrilled before he could gauge Grace’s reaction.

Grace couldn’t help the smile that broke onto his face. “Uhm… No. I’m not, actually. I’m… I dunno. I guess I’m actually kind of excited.” Grace admitted, trying to hide the excitement in his own voice before Rocky seemed to decide the act wasn’t necessary anymore.

With Grace’s confirmation he wasn’t upset, Rocky chirped in excitement and began to spin in circles. He spoke in between what Ryland could only describe as a happy dance. “Grace happy. Grace going to become more like Rocky. Grace excited about it, statement! Rocky happy too! Excited too!” Rocky chirped, so happy he almost seemed like he couldn’t contain himself.

Grace felt odd, suddenly. He looked at Rocky and almost felt… bad? He wasn’t sure why. Something in him was telling him he should be upset about this change in anatomy. That his DNA shifting in such drastic ways that he was starting to resemble the make up of an Eridian. If this had happened when Rocky and him had first met, he probably would’ve been angry. An alien gave him a food that was changing everything about him. Now, though? With these feelings that were bubbling up inside him about Rocky? This just felt like a real way of getting closer to his alien best friend than he ever would have been able to get before. With his temperature increasing, there was a chance the two of them could even touch one day. Maybe even breathe the same air. Grace couldn’t feel an ounce of anger if he tried. He felt nervous, a sense of anxiety about just how different he might become, but other than that he couldn’t seem to stop smiling.

”T-this means we can, well, I mean…” Grace started to say, unable to finish the sentence fully. “We’ll be able to learn a lot more about each other like this.” He corrected himself from what he had planned to say. That they could be closer like this.

Rocky, as if he were able to hear Grace’s thoughts, supplied exactly what he wouldn’t say. “Yes. We understand more, we can be even closer now. Grace is ♫♬♪♩♩.” 

Grace’s cheeks burned. The unexplained feelings he had stirring inside him had gone unnamed the entire time he knew Rocky, but now, he was starting to finally understand. He hadn’t felt like this on earth, not for any partner he had ever had before. Even his longest relationship felt… lacking. He liked the people well enough, sure. Usually he only dated people he had known for years prior. However he had just never fully felt a spark, a connection, the romantic sort of feeling portrayed in movies. He certainly almost never felt sexual attraction in a real way towards these people either. He had his own sex drive, an abnormally low one for the amount of testosterone he was on, but it was almost never directed at his partners. He wasn’t a virgin, but he had never found much enjoyment in sex, nor did he ever seek it out himself. When he really thought about it he had considered there might be something up with that on earth— he remembers researching aromanticism and asexuality back then in a hazy sort of way, but ever since his time on Hail Mary he had put such concerns aside. He had put them aside to the point that he hadn’t considered what he was feeling for Rocky could be related to it at all until now.

Did he have a crush on Rocky?

Grace had never experienced this before. He tried to parse the word Rocky said and roll it over in his head, the context of it this time. Rocky’s tone sounded affectionate, and something about the sound of it buzzed in Grace’s ears now when it hadn’t before. He had to figure out what it was that Rocky was calling him. Maybe he could get rid of this potentially relationship-ruining feeling if he found out it was some kind of insult, or a playful term meant for friends. 

“Are you ever gonna translate what that word means, bud?” Grace asks, smiling without meaning too as he watches Rocky consider his request.

“Grace smart. Grace figure out.” Rocky spoke curtly again.

Something was clicking in Ryland’s brain. Rocky said this word to him in moments like this, in a tone that carried some amount of fondness to it. Eridians didn’t really have an exact translation of the word “my”, but they did have a way of expressing possession. It was more a tone of voice than a verb, or that was the best way Ryland could describe it. That’s how this word was said. Grace is my (blank).

No way. There is no way.

”We have a word for best friend, a word for friend, words for dumb and smart, we… We even have a word for mate. If that was what you were saying, your translator would be, well, translating it.” Grace says slowly.

Rocky seems to nod in confirmation of this, before trying to change the subject. “Grace start log of changes. Grace have camera still, question?” Rocky asks. 

Grace huffs. He wasn’t done talking! “Yes, bud, I still have the camera— wait, is that the word? Buddy? I’m your buddy?”

Rocky stomps his foot in the way he does when he’s warning Grace to be quiet. “Not word. Not important now. Grace go record video. Show body. Do once a week. For science!” 

Grace feels a bit peeved. He would really like to know what Rocky is calling him and why he’s being so cagey about it. However, after finding out his body is going through such an intricate metamorphosis, he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t just as interested in documenting the process. He stood up from the chair in front of the lab computer to move over to the video recording equipment that he hadn’t used since he sent the Beatles back to Earth. He put in an extra SD card for the footage to be stored on and began a short video log documenting his changes thus far, with Rocky close by at his legs to provide additional commentary.

Grace pushes the feeling of longing in his stomach down with all the force he can muster. He will not have the one, good, stable relationship he’s ever had ruined by the first time his body decides to give him a crush on someone. He’s especially not going to let some stupid crush ruin his opportunity to become a real best friend to Rocky— one who doesn’t have to spend every interaction with him behind a wall of xenonite. 

Ryland Grace was going to be so totally and completely normal, and responsible about this.

—

Ryland Grace was being so not normal or responsible about this. 

They were celebrating today— a year from now they would officially be on Erid, and it had officially been 6 months since they started recording Grace’s changes around the half way point of their three year journey. Rocky and Grace had focused all their attention on their new experiment, which was essentially starting to boil down to seeing just how Eridian-esque Ryland could get. Their nature as a pair of intelligent scientists meant that they could never idle for long, and this new “project” was becoming a favorite way to pass the time. They took new samples of skin and blood once a week, not to mention Rocky had managed to connect to the lab’s analysis system and start trying to code in signatures for Eridian exclusive substances to test for as well. They had started taking samples of Grace’s voice about three months into his change, as Rocky began to note his vocal chords were allowing him to produce more intricate and Eridian-like calls, and his voice was becoming song-like when he spoke. It took Grace a while to hear it himself but now he could recognize it strongly, referring to it as his Eridian accent. Rocky hadn’t let up with his need to be close to Grace, only now, he claimed it was all to do with this observational study they were performing.

Oh, and the body checks. Rocky was becoming incredibly throughout with them. Once a day, after his shower, Ryland would step out into the hallway outside the bathroom and allow Rocky to fully examine him. Rocky didn’t have eyes, and yet he saw through walls and clothes with echolocation. This was something Ryland kept reminding himself, as he sat on a towel on the ground naked and allowed Rocky to circle around him. The only reason the alien was doing this was because he wanted to, Grace had concluded. There was no need for him to be naked. Rocky simply preferred it that way and the thought made his head spin, just like most thoughts about Rocky were doing these days. Ryland found himself absentmindedly letting his head get floaty as he considered the idea. Rocky likes it when I’m not wearing clothes. Oh, it made his chest ache. It made him warm in a deep part of his belly.

“Your skin is growing tougher, Grace.” Rocky commented, sounding amused by the idea of it. “Still have soft underbelly. Interesting, statement.”

Grace looked down at his body and assessed the progress for himself. The outer parts of his limbs, as in the tops of his arms and legs, had grown the thick Eridian like skin that had once only been concentrated around his joints. The skin had also grown on his shoulders, up his neck slightly, and down his back. The skin over his shoulder blades was becoming thicker than any other part of his body— the leading theory right now was that the area might eventually become a venting space the way the “top” of Rocky’s thorax was. The skin continued to show a vastly different coloration than that of Grace’s skin, fully looking like red rock now, with gold-ish metallic colored material going through the cracks. He couldn’t help noticing that in Rocky’s case, his body seemed to be largely a brownish color with deeper black running through cracks in his skin, and blue “tattoos” of sorts, different from the ones that were simply carved into him. Grace wondered if eventually he would be ceremonially tattooed like Rocky had. Another thing that struck Grace immediately was that Rocky had been correct in his assessment that Grace still had a soft underbelly. His stomach was soft and plush still, frankly more soft than it had been on earth. The skin was smooth and more pink colored, but he would be lying if he said he hadn’t also gained weight. His new, mercury heavy blood was still driving his body temperature up and affecting his organs in unknown ways, but also had added mass to Grace, and given him cravings for more food too. He would’ve called himself slightly husky had this weight settled on his body as it had been before, but with his developments, it was only serving to make him slightly broader, and give him a slight pooch in his stomach. 

It wasn’t just his stomach, though. His mammary glands remained somewhat soft, but as his shoulders and ribs seemed to be somewhat spreading (again, Grace just felt like he looked broader, but there wasn’t a good way to measure his bones changing at the moment.), they had developed into more pectoral shapes than that of, well, breasts, as much as Grace hated the word. They were still there, but they didn’t feel as… feminine as they had before. Under his arms and the backs of his legs also stayed relatively soft and pink just as his stomach and chest had, especially the ditches of his elbows and knees. Grace figured that was how he was retaining his mobility. The way his hands and feet had progressed had been the hardest to deal with, both them being coated with the rock-like skin everywhere but his palms and the bottom of his feet, and the fact that well. Grace’s toes had begun to… fuse? He freaked out about it when he had first noticed, but slowly it started to make sense— Rocky only had three finger-like appendages on his own limbs. With his new weight, three bigger toes might aid in his balance over time. His fingers were the bigger issue, when his middle and ring finger began to develop the same webbing he had noticed in his toes. It had taken quite a bit of counseling from Rocky to not cut the webbing immediately, and even further counseling to decide to allow it to grow in. It wasn’t as solid as it had been on his toes, which at this point had completely fused into three, rock-like forms just like Rocky’s “hands”, but it still meant he was down to four fingers. He figured the softer skin on his palms and the bottom of his feet would stay just as the rest of the softer parts of his body had. It took quite a bit of practice to adjust to his larger fused middle finger, but, it actually wasn’t all that different to having five fingered hands in the long run.

Rocky’s assessments had become much more intense since the first one months ago. Ryland was too busy assessing his changes for himself to hear Rocky’s request to progress his examination even further this time. He finally came back to reality and looked up from his dazed expression, staring at himself to focus his eyes on Rocky, who was nudging his leg with his ball as he sat on the towel.

”Open.” Rocky said simply, waiting for Grace to comply with his instruction.

Grace’s brain blanked. “Excuse me?” He blurted out, feeling heat rise in his cheeks.

Rocky chirped in a placating way— how did Grace understand that?— and gently hit his leg again. “Check for changes in reproductive organ, urethra, and anus.” Rocky said simply, as if it was the most normal thing in the world.

Grace felt the heat rise in his chest and could barely form a thought for a moment. “Rocky. I know you’ve been giving me… Naked examinations for a while now, but surely that is entirely unnecessary. You said you can see my organs through my skin.”

Rocky stomped his front leg impatiently. “Rocky see better with direct view. Rocky said this, Grace forget. Open legs.” 

Grace blinked and tried to ignore the bubbling warmth in his stomach at the situation at hand. Rocky was demanding to examine his genitals. This was absolutely insane. He was trying to wrap his mind around it, but primarily the thought dominating his mind was Adrian. Rocky had been with his mate for nearly two hundred years, and they would reunite soon. Yet, here they were, with Grace entirely naked and turning into one of Rocky’s species, while harboring a rather intense crush on him to boot. Rocky was trying not to let that crush cloud this situation, or the strange warm feeling in his gut, because at the end of the day this had to be scientific. Rocky was examining him for changes as they were running an experiment, and he needed a better look. It would be like Grace observing something with a microscope, wouldn’t it?

Still, the question wouldn’t leave his brain, and he had to ask. “R-rocky, this is… this is different. You aren’t a, well, uhm, you aren’t a doctor? At least not a human one. This would be very i-intimate for me. What about Adrian?”

Rocky froze in a way that made Grace’s stomach drop. He had to have said something wrong. Rocky seemed to be confused, sad? He couldn’t make out the expressive melody that sprung from him, but the feeling it gave Grace made it feel like his heart was being twisted in his chest. How was he understanding Rocky’s noises like this? He had learned some of the Eridian language, but these weren’t words. They were expressions of feelings that didn’t have exact translations in English. How was he understanding what it was supposed to convey? Had his brain changed beyond just withstanding high heat? Before he knew it, similar noises were coming out of him. He felt a guttural clicking sound erupt from the back of his throat and he simply followed the instinct he felt, ending the call in a warbling melody that made Rocky’s whole body seem to tremble.

”Grace is ♫♬♪♩♩. Adrian was ♫♬♪♩♩. Now Adrian Rocky mate.” Rocky explained slowly, as if waiting for Ryland to connect the dots on his own. “Grace is ♫♬♪♩♩, ♫♬♪♩♩, ♫♬♪♩♩.” He repeated, over and over.

The word felt more comforting than it had ever had before. He had been so worried it was an expression of insult, or some kind of term of endearment for friends on Erid, but now he finally felt like he was understanding. The guilt he had had for this bizarre crush on a married alien started to release its grip on his brain, replaced with a need to get even closer to Rocky. It felt similar to the excitement he had had when he first realized the changes happening to his body, realizing that a gateway to an even deeper connection with Rocky had been opened. 

“Bud, I’m not as smart as you. You have to explain what that word means. Examples, anything. This is interpersonal stuff, it’s harder to—“ Ryland started, his anxiety evident in his now melodic voice.

Rocky interrupted him by pressing his ball closer again. “Word means mate-to-be. Rocky in process of making Grace mate.”

Grace’s little human mind cracked in half.

Mate-to-be. Rocky in process of making Grace mate.

Rocky was dating him. That word, very roughly, must mean something like the equivalent of the human terms Boyfriend, Girlfriend, or Partner. Grace blinked and churned this over in his head, staring blankly at Rocky the entire time as he slowly realized he was bare naked when Rocky finally explained he had been thinking of him as his boyfriend for… months, now? Over a year, actually. He first heard Rocky call him that before they synthesized his meat substitute, and that was only about six months into their time on the Hail Mary together. Rocky had been thinking of him as his partner for a year and a half now, since they were two years in, and Grace had been absolutely none the wiser. How could that be? He swore he had figured out that the term had to be one of friendly endearment, though… he considered he had only been so sure because he didn’t want to confront the feelings he had for Rocky. Grace felt tears pricking at the corners of his eyes because honestly? He felt terrible! He had been harboring a crush he hadn’t needed to keep secret on the person he had been the closest to in his entire life for no reason. He felt like he had led Rocky on with this miscommunication, even if he did want to be Rocky’s partner still.

“Why Grace leaking, question? Grace not want, question?” Rocky asked, sounding so incredibly sad at the idea that it nearly made Grace sick.

”N-No, no buddy, that’s not it at all. At all. I just feel bad I didn’t figure it out sooner!” Ryland wipes his eyes, sniffling like an idiot. “I feel like I’ve been like… I dunno, I haven’t been reciprocating at all! You must’ve been so confused!”

Rocky bumps his leg again with his ball and presses his thorax against the xenonite, offering a hug that Ryland takes right away. “Rocky not confused. Rocky like Grace no matter what.”

Grace blinked, then, couldn’t help laughing. His ears rolled down his cheeks and he laughed hard, leaning against the xenonite ball in amusement. “Is that how it w-works on Erid? You start dating without asking?”

Rocky chirped indignantly. “What Grace mean? Ugly word.” 

Grace smiled again. So they don’t call it dating. “What would you call what me and you are doing, then?”

Rocky huffed. “Grace said dating is what Grace did with girl who left for Mark. Rocky not leave Grace. Only do this with future mate.”

Ryland’s heart twisted in warmth again and he felt like he almost couldn’t breathe. He had heard humans on earth talk like this before, dating with intent to marry, but it was usually related to some kind of religious fundamentalism. The really traditional of those types called dating courtship, because they felt the word was more serious. Rocky hadn’t indicated at this point thus far that he was a traditionalist, so Ryland guessed this was a universal Eridian sentiment. To date is to lack intent to be together forever, to Rocky, and he wants to be with Ryland forever. The thought makes Ryland’s heart skip a beat.

”O-oh. So… uhm… well, I’ll explain an English word for that later. You’re serious, then? Still, you didn’t ask, and Adrian doesn’t know we’re—“ Ryland tried to start saying, only to be interrupted again.

”Rocky did ask! Rocky take control of making Grace food. That is asking. Very personal, very private.” Rocky defended himself, like he was offended at the idea that he didn’t ask Ryland Grace out. “Eridian mates work different. Humans would not like if their mate brought home a new mate?”

Ryland scoffed, laughing again without meaning to. “No, bud, if a human brought home a new mate without asking it would be a problem, probably. Unless they were into that.” Then the first part of Rocky’s sentence registered. “Wait, so— oh my gosh.” Grace mumbled.

It was all starting to click. That’s why Rocky had gotten so offended when he questioned his ability to synthesize his food. That’s why he said that eating was private, but not for them. That’s why Rocky had become so incredibly clingy, more than before even. All of this was Eridian courtship rituals. Grace felt even worse as he realized he had essentially questioned Rocky’s ability to be a good partner to him at first, but that feeling was starting to get dwarfed by overwhelming affection. Rocky had not only been dating him, he was courting him the way an Eridian would, because Rocky wants to spend his future with him.

Rocky waited patiently for the wires to connect in Grace’s head. “Humans especially dumb with emotions.” Rocky said plainly, sounding as if he was smiling when he said it. Grace realized the tone was affectionate, considering Rocky had no mouth.

”I guess we really are. Or at least I am.” Grace admitted, running his hand through his hair in exasperation. “R-rocky, uhm… So we’re… together? Adrian won’t have any problems with it?”

Rocky chirped in thought. “Adrian will want to be with Grace too. Adrian will like Grace.” He rolled his ball against Grace again. “But, agree. Rocky and Grace together. Grace is ♫♬♪♩♩.”

Grace smiled, the flush returning to his cheeks as he realized the situation was still at hand. He was bare naked in front of his partner Rocky, who had asked him to spread his legs before clarifying that the intimacy of it would be fine because they’ve been together for over a year. Grace would have felt more prepared had he known that the whole time, sure, but for some reason, he wasn’t feeling nearly as apprehensive as he should. In fact before he could give it much deeper of a thought he found himself opening up his legs and leaning against the wall. Rocky rolled himself around Grace’s leg to position his ball in between them, watching Grace open his legs with what appeared to be great interest.

”O-ok, Rocky. I-if we’re mates-to-be, I guess this is… not as strange as it would’ve been before.” Ryland said, trying to keep his tone measured and even. “But uhm… since you can’t touch me, you’re gonna have to tell me what to show you.”

Rocky nods with his thorax, stomping to confirm his understanding. “Rocky want Grace spread that skin with fingers.” Rocky pointed at Ryland’s vagina, which had the man bright red in an instant.

”Do you know, uhm, proper terms, Rocky?” Ryland asked. “This is going to be a lot easier if you can be specific.” 

Rocky seemed to blow off a bit of steam in vague confusion. “Rocky research on portable thinking machine. Rocky think it is called labia majora. Need to observe the labia minora first.”

Great. Not only was Researching things about humans, some of what he researched involved an increased understanding of the anatomy of Ryland Grace’s genitalia. An increased understanding that had Ryland Grace feeling like he might just pass out and die if Rocky kept speaking to him like that. Nevertheless, he followed his instructions, placing his fingers on either side of his outer lips to pull the skin back, showing what used to be the reddish-pink skin inside of them. Ryland was just as surprised as Rocky was to find that internally, the more fragile skin had turned a baby pink color. It was very warm to the touch given Ryland’s temperature only continued to increase, but he found that not only had the skin changed color but it was almost… iridescent? Like the inside of an oyster. He looked deeply confused as Rocky seemed to chirp in delight.

”Just like Rocky thought!” He seemed to cheer excitedly. “Grace is so pretty. Grace even more like Eridian now.”

Grace was trying to figure out how he felt about his junk being alien now too. He was honestly more concentrated on Rocky just calling him pretty. He let his legs relax, as if this position wasn’t incredibly compromising, and smiled up at Rocky in a dazed sort of way.

”W-what… What is it? I mean, why is it changing color too? Feels s-softer. Really hot, temperature wise.” Grace asked, absentmindedly moving the folds of skin between his fingers with great interest.

”Grace underbelly, soft, vulnerable… Grace internal anatomy even more so. Eridian internal anatomy all same, always softer and squishier than outside.” Rocky hummed in interest. “Not know about color. Cannot see.”

Grace considered the pigmentation for himself. Lack of blood flow couldn’t be the answer, because the heat coming off of his anatomy was felt even against his spread thighs. He couldn’t parse it well at the moment, so he decided to put it out of his mind because frankly, the color of his new anatomy should probably be the least of his concern. Rocky chirped as he seemed to finish his assessment of the first glance he was getting. 

“Pull back labia minora now. Rocky examine urethra and clitoris.” Rocky spoke in a measured tone, but there was such a lilt of demand to what he said. Like Grace was being told what to do, not asked.

Grace nodded without thinking, softly mumbling to himself. “Maybe anatomical terms were a bad idea, bud. I’m getting embarrassed.”

Rocky stomped a foot in concern. “Dysphoria, question?” 

Grace couldn’t help the snort that rose from him at the sentiment. Rocky was being so kind, so understanding– it was kind of hard to wrap his brain around. No one on earth had treated him this way during a sexual encounter. The fact Rocky was concerned about Grace’s dysphoria at all, as an alien with no concept of human gender beyond what Grace had told him, was enough to amuse him. He supposed he should’ve expected this sort of respect from partners back on earth, too, but he had always been a push over. The good news, to boot, was he actually wasn’t feeling very dysphoric. He felt a bit awkward, sure, but he felt completely sure Rocky understood who he truly was. He didn’t feel the level of lingering insecurity he had felt with just about every other person on earth. For once, Grace was starting to enjoy these new feelings instead of trying to box them into a corner in his brain.

Grace shook his head, sporting a fond smile now. “No, no— I’m pretty ok with things… down here. This just feels very intimate. The clitoris is a very sensitive erogenous zone.” Grace tried to explain.

Rocky trilled in acknowledgement. Like he knew that already. “Of course. Grace get pleasure from this, is good.”

Grace had gotten pretty comfortable in the ruse they had going, that all of this was for the sake of some kind of study on his changing body. Now, though, that ruse’s cracked exterior just shattered right in front of him. Not only were he and Rocky partners, soon to be mates, but now Rocky was expressly hoping that this anatomical puppet show of sorts might bring Grace pleasure. They were engaging in sexual acts together, Grace was practically masturbating in front of Rocky for heck’s sake! He tried to ignore how hot his cheeks felt and found that he actually couldn’t, because their theories about his back scales beginning to form vents was correct. Almost as soon as the realization that this was, in a way, he and Rocky’s “first time” hit Ryland, two puffs of hot steam hissed into clouds out of his shoulder blades. Rocky seemed thrilled, tapping in an excited circle and chirping repeatedly. 

“Grace do what Rocky say, and that will happen more.” Rocky commented, almost like making a mental note of it. “Rocky thinks that Grace should keep going, show Rocky clitoris.” 

How lewd. Those words felt bizarre coming out of Rocky, but Grace figured his filter was going to have to slip a little if they continued. He dropped his legs from where they were hiked up and instead let them rest on the ground, completely apart, pressing himself back onto his free hand as his occupied one moved to follow Rocky’s request. He opened his inner folds more, pushing his fingers along the hot skin and feeling it… Grip him back?! It would seem his labia minoria had developed tiny villi looking formations that helped to grip whatever touched them, and not very lightly either. If he pressed his fingers down, he could feel the tiny tendrils moving against the pads of his fingertips. He gasped, realizing how much more sensitive he felt as he added pressure to the touch, feeling the heat between his legs grow into a definitive wetness, too. He tried to brush the feeling aside because Rocky asked him to do something. His head swam and he felt his eyelids twitch, falling downward slightly and pushing his top lashes into his vision. The more he thought about Rocky’s command and listened to the Eridian chirp in front of him in interest, the more floaty he started to feel. He brought his fingers up finally after stalling and pulled back the light pink, opalescent skin to reveal his clitoris, trying his best to hold himself to the point that Rocky could see his urethra too, though that was more of a guess on Ryland’s part. He felt himself breathing heavier before he realized how hard his chest was heaving.

“C-can you see? My clitoris was enlarged prior to the food, b-but I think it’s gotten a bit bigger? Gosh, it’s, ngh, more sensitive too.” Ryland tries to offer his own commentary, desperate to ignore the fact that this is no longer an experimental look at his own genitalia. “What do you think, bud?” 

Rocky purrs again, pleased with the view he’s been given evidently. “Rocky think Grace look beautiful. Rocky think Grace should show him how sensitive he has become.”

Oh. Well, alright then.

Ryland Grace was suddenly not able to think about science the way he had been thinking about it at all. This was particularly odd because even when he had tried intercourse on earth, he had found himself thinking about science more than anything else. He was once asked what he was thinking about during an intimate moment and honestly responded that he had been considering the ethics of gene editing, which promptly ended the encounter. He had never had sex keep his attention, and never felt all that interested in it when compared to learning. He still thought learning was pretty awesome, and he doubted his low libido would change much, but holy cow, was this type of sex keeping his attention. The only scientific thought sneaking past his now Rocky-afflicted brain was how they could become more compatible. How they could find a way to mate the way an Eridian would mate with another Eridian, considering Grace now had zero interest in ever having sex the human way again. 

As Ryland Grace makes the decision that he’s going to lean full boat into the alien sexual encounter before him, his brain relaxes in a way he’s also never really felt before. That floaty sensation becomes intense, making Grace feel… suggestable. He blinks at Rocky and remembers his instruction, to “Show how sensitive he’s become”, and cannot help but do anything but do just that. Grace presses his fingers down on either side of his clitoris, slowly bringing them together and up to squeeze it between his index and middle finger in a V–shape, then pressing them back down– he was jerking himself off in front of Rocky. Very quickly, his arm holding up his upper body began to tire. With his fingers still focused on slowly squeezing his clit up and down, he scoots his body back to better brace against the wall behind him, allowing him to slip his other hand from behind his back to join the one rubbing at his clit. Ryland went to add his second hand to the equation, feeling the familiar urge he always tended to get (On the rare occasions he masturbated) that screamed for penetrative sensation. Before he could give it to himself, though, he remembered his audience. He remembered that he was meant to be doing what Rocky asked of him right now, and to add fingers inside himself without permission… well it just felt wrong.

“What Grace doing, question?” Rocky asked, his warbling excited song finally registering again to Grace’s ears. “Second hand add more pleasure, question?”

Grace nodded. He had no energy left to be embarrassed anymore. “Y-yeah. My clitoris feels–ngh– Insane, Rocky. So, so sensitive. I… I like to have… oh, goodness.” Grace hesitated. Maybe he did actually have energy for embarrassment.

“Grace tell Rocky now. Stop making this hard.” Rocky’s tone shifted. His excitement was still evident, but he sounded like he did when he was frustrated with Grace. 

Well, shoot. Grace could feel how that sent a shock right through his core, making him whine. Words came out of him involuntarily. “Yes, sir. I-I like penetration. Like to have things inside of me.”

Rocky hummed in interest. Like he had assumed as much. His three fingered hand pressed against the xenonite glass and formed a fist, bumping it several times. Rocky seemed to be thinking, calibrating for something. Grace’s heart skipped a beat as he considered Rocky was evaluating if he could fit his fingers, possibly his fist, inside of Grace’s vagina. That thought made Grace feel like he could genuinely pass out. Grace didn’t dare to move his hand, awaiting instructions like they were the gospel. He had started to think this was the case after all the memories he’s recovered from the Hail Mary, but truly, this is the first time it dawned on Grace just how much he preferred this position he was in. Being given a clear instruction to follow, proving how good at listening he was by waiting, proving to Rocky that he could be a good mate. His hand still moved in jilted up and down motions over his clit, squeezing it between his fingers with every pump, drawing soft moans out of him that he only just realized he was making. They sounded melodic, higher pitched, like a call and response system was starting to form between him and his alien companion.

“Grace has not added fingers yet. Why, question?” Rocky asked. “You said it brings you pleasure to have them inside you– or is this incorrect?” 

Rocky seemed to genuinely not grasp the headspace Ryland was finding himself in, which is why mustering a response took so much brain power. “Uh… I a-also like… I like being told what to do, how to do it, especially… right now, with stuff like, uh, this. Oh, my goodness.” Ryland speaks slowly, his head lulling to the side of his shoulder.

Rocky made a series of soft, gentle calls Ryland hadn’t heard before, at least not in this slow, gentle way. Like he too was realizing the vulnerable state Grace was in. Grace searched the body language and tone of calls from the Eridian and found similarities between what he was doing now and what he had done when they had gone fishing on Adrian the planet. It wasn’t nearly as panicked, but Ryland started to understand that Rocky was expressing frustration he couldn’t touch him by doing this, a want to help, a want to be closer. He felt the same way Grace did. 

“Grace want Rocky to guide him. Not like experiment, but like mate, statement.” Rocky buzzed with excitement, like a shaken up beehive. “Rare on Erid. Strength is valued, intelligence… Eridian call this ♪♩♬♫♪♪♪♫♬♬♩♩♫.”

Grace tried to translate from what he knew. He could hear his name somewhere in there, and the Eridian word for mate, but the rest of it had been conjugated in a way he couldn’t wrap his mind around. “What does that m-mean?” He asked, cursing himself for how meek he sounded.

“Word for mate personality and physiology type. All Eridians hermaphrodite, but most Eridian called ♬♪♪♩♫♪. Mean they prefer appearing strong, very smart. Some Eridian are smart and strong, but prefer pretending to be neither. Like being bossed around, told, not asked.” Rocky explained. The assessment was curt, but still amused. “Human word?”

Grace’s face was completely red at this point. “H-humans might call it top and bottom, Rocky, or dominant and submissive.” He tried to give his best guesstimate at the terms Rocky was using, but he assumed that the direct translations from Eridian were much more meaningful and less perverted.

Rocky hummed in agreement, nevertheless. “That works. Grace would make good incubator.” Rocky puffed his caripace out and seemed more assertive in body language, like he had made an official choice. “Grace put two fingers inside his vaginal opening, statement. Not question.”

Grace did not need to be told twice. He slowed the movements over his clit so he didn’t grow overwhelmed too quickly, but he allowed his other hand to snake down between his thighs further. This time, instead of pulling aside the skin first, Grace simply pushed his index finger past the warm folds of his insides. He couldn’t believe how good it felt, causing his thighs to tremble, especially given that the skin on top of his finger had become thick, cracked, and Eridian like. It made it feel like it was, for lack of a better term, ribbed for his pleasure. He hated how high pitched the gasp that it milked out of him was, but within a few moments of allowing his hole to flutter around his finger and adjust to the intrusion, he added the second finger like he had been asked. He was really making a mess of himself now, both hands working on pleasuring himself as his mouth seemed busy making the most noise possible. Eventually, his moans drew out more, sounding more like Eridian song-calls.

Grace couldn’t see him well, but Rocky’s opinion was evident. “Grace look amaze. Grace look pretty. Grace’s voice pretty, too. Sound more like songs. Saying you feel good and don’t even know it.” Rocky’s voice was starting to become… breathy, somehow.

Grace gasps in desperation, pressing his hips upward into his hands without thinking. He was getting close, after rubbing his clit for so long and now scissoring his two fingers inside of himself to work his hole open. A wet spot had formed on the towel he sat on who knows how long ago. He wasn’t sure how to explain it to Rocky, that he felt so good he felt like he could explode at any moment– this was especially true because he wanted, desperately, for Rocky to tell him no. To insist that Grace wouldn’t be allowed to finish until Rocky was satisfied with his performance. Perhaps he was getting ahead of himself, there. He turned himself on his side to try to look more directly at Rocky now that he couldn’t hold himself up whatsoever. He focused his eyes, noting the metallic, shiny substance running down under Rocky’s legs, onto the cloor of the ball he stood inside. 

This just keeps getting better.

“You like me t-that much?” Ryland asks, delirious. If he had the brainpower to care, he would have tried to sound less like he was drooling. “You’re leaking, sweetheart.”

The pet name slips out without much forethought. Ryland has always found Sweetheart to be one of the best terms of endearment there was, only challenged by the likes of terms like love or paramour, which were both much too poetic for the situation at hand. He’s truly thinking of Rocky as a partner now, even if he can’t register it himself fully.

Rocky trills before he begins to purr, stomping each of his legs in succession. He pushes a huff of steam out and seems flustered, something that makes Ryland’s heart ache. “Grace make Rocky leak. Grace too pretty. Rocky want to make Grace Rocky’s mate, make Grace Rocky and Adrian’s Incubator.”

Grace was almost certainly going to cum if Rocky kept talking about making him into an incubator, whatever that meant. He was shocked at how ok he was with whatever that implied, no explanation needed. Still, though, he had to ask– what kind of scientist would he be if he didn’t?

“W-what do you mean, Sweetheart? Incubator? That’s something submissive Eridians do?” Grace asked, panting heavily now as he became suddenly desperate for more. “C-can I add another finger, sir?”

Rocky chirped in satisfaction at Ryland calling him sir, pressing his carapace against the xenonite to make Ryland look up at the sound. “Yes, good for asking. Follow instructions so well.” Rocky commented, lowering his body almost like he wanted Grace to see his undercarriage as it leaked more of the metallic substance. “Incubators carry eggs. Most Eridian have too many things to do to care for eggs– takes great toll on body. Eridians like you good at carrying eggs because you like it. Other Eridians find it uncomfortable.”

Just like Ryland thought, that was way too much. He let out a high pitched trilling sound that Rocky seemed to respond to right away, copying Ryland’s tone and melody perfectly. This ritual made Grace feel so comforted, his head swimming again like it had been at the start of this before Rocky had brought him back to semi-consciousness. He gazed up at the Eridian frozen in amusement above him, spreading his legs more as he laid on his side and worked himself open with a third finger. His mind completely fixated on the idea that Rocky and Adrian would lay eggs within him eventually. He couldn’t believe how appealing the thought sounded.

“W-would–ah– Would that be possible? Oh, Rocky, I-I want that, I want that. Rocky I am going to cum.” Ryland asked, eyes screwing themselves shut as tears pricked the side of his eyes. “Rocky, Sweetheart, buddy, I-I really like you. Need you.”

Rocky purred again, more low and territorial sounding than ever. “You’re changing so much. If not possible, we make it possible. We are scientists.” Rocky says simply, like he’s sure of it, though Ryland can tell how affected he is. How turned on he’s making his best friend. “Ryland cum now. Rocky experiment with Ryland later.”

Ryland could deal with that compromise, even if he wished Rocky would be a little meaner. It was their first time, after all, and Rocky was generally kind by nature– Especially to Grace. The instruction was clear, though, Rocky wanted him to make himself cum and put on a show. Grace decided to oblige.

Grace hiked up his legs again, planting his feet on the floor and rolling himself onto his back from where he had been on his side. He waited for Rocky to adjust his view before allowing his three fingers to push in and out of his hole, drawing embarrassing and loud trills out of him each time. The hand on his clit was much too uncoordinated to work in consistent motions, so he took to rubbing circles around the head of his clitoris as quickly as he could instead. He felt his back lifting off of the towel, felt his head hit the floor a few times from the fact his body simply couldn’t stay still anymore. Rocky chirped in concern, his noises getting louder along with Grace’s as if he were trying to match energy. The fact that both of them were copying each other's cries was causing Grace’s heart to lurch in his chest, his tears to flow freely– This must be what heaven feels like, he considers. Grace finds himself sobbing as he repeatedly hits the sweet spot he’s found inside himself at this angle.

“Sweetheart, sweetheart I’m gonna– oh my gosh!” Grace cried out, finding words spilling out of him at the same time that he felt cum squirt from inside of himself. “W-wanna be your incubator, want to give you my body, know you’d take care of me. Please.”

Ryland Grace had no idea he could cum that hard. He had no idea squirting was real, he thought it must be a porn based fantasy up until he felt it happening to himself. The fluid he was secreting was thicker than it ever had been before, stickier too. He felt the aftermath of what he had said come to him in waves as his orgasm wracked through his body. He had just told Rocky he wanted to carry eggs for Adrian and him. He had told him he wanted Rocky to have his body like a possession. That he trusted him. Ryland liked to have walls up, famously, and he was quickly realizing there was very little to be said about a wall that allowed those things to slip through. Rocky had gotten him more vulnerable than any other partner had before. He opened his mouth to speak, but was interrupted by Rocky’s lilting melodic voice.

“Good boy, Ryland Grace. Did well. We will make a good incubator out of you. Proved yourself well. Rocky so pleased to have a mate-to-be like you.” Rocky puffed up proudly again, the obvious evidence of his own arrival pooling at his legs. “Rocky must get Grace to bed, watch Grace sleep. Grace use so much energy.”

Was he about to get aftercare from Rocky?

Ryland felt the need to voice what he planned to say regardless of how comforting it felt, how loved he felt. “Rocky I’m s-so sorry.” He blurted out. “T-that… that was a lot for the first– humans don’t discuss kids the first time they have sex. I think I must be l-losing it.” Ryland whimpered, slowly managing to sit up after taking his hands away from his genitalia.

“Hush. Rocky not apologize, neither does Grace. Incubation important– must discuss. Adrian and Rocky never found anyone good like Grace on Erid, statement.” Rocky asserted, sure enough for the both of them. He nudged Grace with his ball, making a gesture like he wanted a hug.

Ryland was much too tired to argue, and he did honestly really want to hug Rocky. Let alone how everything Rocky had just said was making him feel the warmth in his stomach all over again. “A-alright. So… so this is real then?” Grace asks, bringing himself up to hug Rocky’s xenonite ball as he speaks.

Rocky purrs, chirping in confirmation and nudging Grace over and over as he does so. “Very real. When we land on Erid, make Grace home, Adrian make Grace their mate-to-be too. Have ceremony, then make Grace incubator.”

Grace’s head really spun with that one. “Have a ceremony” meant this really was some sort of marriage he was entering into. They’d marry him, then they’d have children together. In Eridian terms, they’d mate and lay eggs inside him, making him their Incubator. As he laid it out to himself like that it felt as overwhelming as it felt exciting. He had considered kids on earth, deciding he would be much too selfish and cowardly to stand up for them like he would need to in their lifetimes, but now… he was a completely different man than the one he had been on earth. Not only was he a different man, but he was becoming an entirely different species. He felt more confident now that he could be a good parent, especially with Rocky and Adrian at his sides. He had never felt confident about something so big before in his life, aside from the choice to leave earth for Rocky.

“I… I’d really, really like that.” Grace mumbled, embarrassed to admit how attractive the idea was now that he was out of his haze of arousal. “Can we talk more about it? I-I don’t need to rest.” Ryland tried to insist.

“Absolutely not.” Rocky huffed. “You need sleep. Rocky watch. Bed, now.” Rocky didn’t sound like he was willing to compromise, the tapping of his legs reading as impatient now. 

Grace felt the pull to follow the directions, even if it was non-sexual now. It made him feel good to follow an order from Rocky, like a warm feeling in his chest. He slowly pulled himself to his feet, using Rocky’s ball to balance himself as he wobbled on his jelly legs. He picked the towel up and tossed it back in the bathroom, where he’d no doubt be showering again after a very sticky nap, before walking towards the beds with Rocky slowly following at his side. He lowered himself down onto the mattress pad and bed set up they had configured, xenonite surrounding it at every angle so Rocky could get a direct view of Ryland whenever he wanted. He was so sleepy now, the exercise of masturbating for the first time in literal years finally hitting him. Rocky’s ball affixed to his xenonite climbing gym and he clambered into it, curling up on the triangle of xenonite right above Ryland’s chest. He could see the metallic fluid under Rocky drying on his skin, and he sleepily fretted about it before he could filter himself. 

“S-shoot, m’sorry, didn’t mean to leave you hanging.” Grace mumbled, rubbing his eyes as he took off his glasses. “D-do you want help with t-that?” Grace pointed unceremoniously under Rocky’s body.

“Mmm. Later. Sleep, first. Follow directions.” Rocky hummed in interest, curling into the loaf-esque ball he did while watching Grace sleep.

Grace found it hard to argue when he was already dozing off. “M’excited to have a baby with you, Rocky. Bet they’ll look like little pebbles. Tha’sooo cute.” Ryland yawned, finally closing his eyes to sleep.

Rocky trilled in agreement, almost cooing to Grace in an excited, whispering esque tone, not daring to wake his now sleeping mate-to-be. “Yes, so exciting. Grace Rocky make baby.”