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Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
19 Jun 2026
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Summary
Felis Black did not ask to be here. He did not ask to plunge through the ceiling and land flat on his ass in the middle of a room of snot-nosed brats who were currently staring at him like he’d grown a second head.
Now, here he sat in a pile of drywall and dust, armed with nothing but two hours of sleep, raging ADHD, and a deep, hallucination-tinted understanding that this whole wizard thing must be a very bad (or very good?) dream.
Unfortunately for the wizarding world, a sleep-deprived Felis has absolutely zero impulse control—and he happens to know exactly how this entire story ends. If these kids think a twelve-year-old talking to a snake is a crisis, they are not ready for a guy who hasn't slept since Tuesday, can hear the castle walls vibrating, and is about to treat the sacred timeline like a sandbox.