Chapter Text
Darkness. Cold, dead darkness filled the air of the empty void. Particles of chilling crystalized vapor, formed from heavy breaths, echoed in the vast vacuum. The icicles, upon birth, rapidly floated towards a central point that swirled and swirled until nothing remained.
At the epicenter was a bright green light that strobed as it formed a spiral within the black hole that consumed all in the range of infinity. All except one.
You continued to float, motionless in front of the black hole like you always did. Your heavy breaths like clockwork formed ice shards that immediately made their home in the green and black monster that consumed your world.
Or was it really your world? If it were to be your world, then that would mean that you belonged in the first place. That there would be a purpose to you being there in the first place. Thinking your world being a place of torment and suffering that perpetuated the pain that had been inflicted upon you your whole life was an absurd idea.
No, it wasn’t your world.
A chilled wind blew through your hair as more and more began to enter the proximity of the ever growing beast in front of your eyes. You couldn’t look away or move the hair from your face. All you could do was stare.
Your emerald green eyes matched the piercing lime that enveloped every last bit of your being; yet, through it all, it didn’t pull you in. It didn’t drag you kicking and screaming like it’d done every last bit of your world. No! Stop it! Not your world!
It took everything you had left: your friends, your family, even the small wonders that kept you stable in the long days and nights continued to beat you down one by one. An infinity that you had to grow accustomed to. But even this calamity couldn’t free you like it’d done everyone else.
Their heroic sacrifices and just deaths carried them on to a world beyond. You weren’t sure what that world was - but you knew that it was better than the limbo that held you captive.
Despite it all, you couldn’t bring yourself to cry. Before, it felt effortless to let the liquids pool up in your eyes and drain onto your face. For some reason, now more than ever, you had no reason to feel emotion. You were a lifeless husk of a human being. It was just more of the same.
You were the loneliest girl in the universe.
You were Jade Harley.
Jade’s eyes fluttered open, awakening her to the ceiling that filled her vision. In the darkness, it almost felt like it was black rather than the lighter gray that she recalled it being. Though, the details didn’t matter much with her blurry vision, clouded by years of cone deterioration and, of course, the tears that ran down her face.
She slowly sat up and felt the cushions of the couch on her left arm. Her tail slowly moved into a comfortable position while her body turned to properly sit. When her feet touched the ground, a pile of her dirty clothes rubbed against her toes.
Letting out a sigh, she hugged her pillow and took a deep breath.
It was that stupid dream again…
She lamented her recurring dream that repeatedly haunted her every night. Like clockwork, when she went to sleep, she’d always have the same nightmare before waking up in the middle of the night. It would take hours to finally go back to sleep; though, after a while, she saw it best to not even bother going back to sleep.
Tears poured from her eyes and splashed onto the rock hard pillow like water balloons, drenching it more than it had already attained from the sweat of her prior sleep.
JADE: why…
JADE: why wont it stop…
She blubbered in a soft mumbled voice. It was hard to air her emotions while being respectful to her friends who let her lodge while she looked towards the next thing. Well, they didn’t exactly let her stay out of the kindness of their hearts. She practically begged to sleep on their couch on her latest bout of couch surfing. Despite that though, a part of her wondered if this would be the last time she’d need to move.
Her head shook violently as the thought passed through her head.
Of course not! This is just you trying to get in their pants again, Jade!
Her self awareness had unfortunately run counter to the biological urges that plagued her every being. It was an urge that she needed to satiate in any way possible, but when everything was said and done, she never could settle with anyone that could assist her.
Light thumps quietly echoed from behind the couch, alerting Jade’s doggy ears to a presence nearby. They made their way in the direction of the kitchen, which then faintly glowed with soft white light.
Realizing that maybe a glass of water could help, Jade grabbed her glasses from the coffee table and put them upon her face as she walked towards the light.
She squinted her eyes, taken aback by the brightness that glowed from the refrigerator, only slightly blocked by a silhouette of a man with baggy pajama pants and an oversized t-shirt. However, as soon as the light had offended her pupils, it faded away with a loud clap.
In its wake, the silhouette fully formed to a familiar face that looked at her with a slight smirk.
DAVE: cant sleep either huh?
JADE: yeah :(
DAVE: karkats doing his loud ass snoring thing that he insists isnt a fucking thing
DAVE: ive filmed him doing it but he just deflects it saying its my heavy fucking breathing
DAVE: jade be honest with me
DAVE: do i breath loud
JADE: uh no
JADE: i dont think so
JADE: at least not that i know anyways
DAVE: exactly
DAVE: whatever
DAVE: nothing says good nights sleep like a bottle of alchemized aj
DAVE: which gotta say rose really figured this shit out
DAVE: its spot fucking on
Dave took a swig of his bottle of apple juice. After he finished his sip, he rubbed his mouth with his hand and adjusted his sunglasses. Jade just looked at him, awkwardly standing in the doorway without a thing to say.
Suddenly, the bottle was in her face, Dave’s smirk growing to something that resembled a genuine smile.
DAVE: want a sip?
DAVE: we got basically infinite of this shit
DAVE: maybe itll help with whatevers keepin you up
Jade slightly smiled and took him up on the offer. The slightly spicy, sweet liquid washed across her tongue, sending a calmness down her spine that she could barely describe. After mimicking Dave’s finishing gesture after her sip, she passed the bottle back to him.
JADE: thanks
JADE: i
JADE: really needed that
DAVE: no problem
DAVE: since it looks like were both probably not gonna sleep for a sec
DAVE: looks like someone needs a little feelings jam
JADE: im fine dave i promise!
DAVE: i heard you sobbing when i came down
DAVE: were talking about this shit whether you like it or not
JADE: dave i think id rather just go back to sleep
DAVE: too late harely
DAVE: the feelings jam has just started
DAVE: get in your fucking places cuz were about to do some crazy ass therapy
Jade chuckled and decided that perhaps a talk with Dave wouldn’t be such a bad idea.
The two made their way to the couch where Jade grabbed her pillow and brought her feet in front of her on the couch. Dave, conversely, sat down on the opposite side with his legs crossed, staring Jade down through his opaque looking black shades and swirling the apple juice bottle in his hand.
DAVE: give me the low down
DAVE: youre bawling your eyes out on my couch almost every night
DAVE: why
JADE: first off its not every night!
DAVE: ive been doing midnight aj runs for the last few weeks
DAVE: i hear you crying
DAVE: tell me why
JADE: im sorry if im making it even harder for you to sleep :(
DAVE: jade for fucks sake
DAVE: stop dodging shit
DAVE: tell me whats up
JADE: o-ok…
JADE: ive been having these dreams recently where a black hole eats up all of earth c and im always the last one left to watch it happen
JADE: everyone dies and i just have to float and wait for it all to end
JADE: but…
JADE: its kinda worse than that cuz in the dream everyones fighting
JADE: so its not like on the other side everyone will be ok
JADE: and i just have to be there alone
As Jade recounted her dream, she started choking up, tears streaming down her face. She tried to stop herself by holding her breath and rubbing the fluid from her eyesockets.
JADE: s-sorry…
JADE: fuck
JADE: i shouldnt be talking about this cuz its my problem
DAVE: jade
JADE: im sorry dave…
DAVE: jade! fuck!
DAVE: its ok
DAVE: thats a crazy ass dream
DAVE: sorry you have to deal with that shit
DAVE: im sure thats traumatizing as hell
JADE: yeah…
DAVE: im gonna guess you havent talked to rose about it yet
Jade shook her head.
DAVE: im not gonna act like an expert
DAVE: but im definitely not qualified to interpret dreams like that
DAVE: and believe me karkat absolutely isnt either lol
JADE: lol
JADE: it would be funny to hear him try to find something out of it
JADE: “IT MEANS YOU NEED TO GET OFF YOUR ASS AND DO SOMETHING.” “but karkat you sit on your ass all day!” “WELL YOU’RE PART DOG SO IT’S DIFFERENT. DO WHAT DOGS DO OR WHATEVER.”
DAVE: your karkat impression is spot on
DAVE: at this point im surprised you dont fuck with him doing it
JADE: oh dont worry heehee
JADE: i have my plans
Jade winked at Dave who just let out a small laugh.
JADE: but yeah youre right
JADE: ill try and see if rose is free to talk tomorrow
JADE: maybe she knows whats up
DAVE: heres hoping theyre not having a rosemary day
JADE: rosemary day?
DAVE: yknow some gay lesbian date day bullshit
JADE: oh you mean like rose and kanaya having a day for themselves
DAVE: ye
JADE: where does rosemary come into this
DAVE: jade
JADE: what?
DAVE: jade harley
JADE: what???
DAVE: cmon its right there
DAVE: the name
JADE: i dont know what youre talking about
DAVE: youre fucking with me
DAVE: i can see that little smile
JADE: im serious!!!
DAVE: jade youre practically laughing holy shit
DAVE: youre awful at lying
DAVE: you know what it means
JADE: i doooont
DAVE: tell me jade
DAVE: what does it mean
DAVE: cuz i know you know
JADE: i swear to god i dont!
DAVE: then why are you laughing???
JADE: cuz youre being really funny!
JADE: i dont know!
JADE: just tell me!
Dave disappointedly shook his head with a smirk. Jade barely held back her further laughter.
DAVE: fine
DAVE: yknow rose right
JADE: yeah lol
DAVE: and kanayas last name is maryanne or some shit
JADE: maryam but yeah
DAVE: so boom rosemary
JADE: oooooooh!
JADE: thats really creative! :D
JADE: i didnt know you were into ship names like that dave!
DAVE: im not
DAVE: i just needed a short hand to talk about those two
JADE: thats literally what a ship name is lol
DAVE: whatever
DAVE: not important
JADE: whatever you say dave heehee
In their back and forth, they didn’t realize how close they’d gotten. Jade had moved almost the entire couch towards Dave, who had remained planted the whole time.
After Jade had finished talking, silence filled the air as her eyes practically glistened in the dark living room that housed the two friends. Upon instinct, Jade brought herself even closer to Dave, her face rapidly approaching his. She saw her reflection in his sunglasses, letting her imagine the beautiful eyes behind them.
DAVE: jade
Jade was immediately snapped out of her trance and brought herself a few inches back from Dave, looking away embarrassed.
JADE: sorry dave :(
JADE: i dont know what came over me
DAVE: its fine
DAVE: you have those dog hormones or whatever that makes you do shit like that
DAVE: im used to it
JADE: i just dont wanna make you uncomfortable
JADE: im afraid that someday im just gonna go over the line and youre gonna accept it
JADE: ill be this horrible person for forcing you into something you dont want
DAVE: jade listen
DAVE: if im gonna kiss you itll be cuz i let it happen
DAVE: but right now im just not feeling that way
DAVE: theres a lot of shit goin on up here
He pointed to his head.
JADE: i understand
From behind the two of them, loud stomps filled the house as another person approached. From around the corner two horns stuck out alongside a bed of unkempt hair.
KARKAT: FOR FUCKS SAKE.
KARKAT: CAN’T YOU TWO KEEP IT DOWN?
KARKAT: SOME PEOPLE NEED THEIR BEAUTY SLEEP!
Dave and Jade looked at Karkat behind them.
JADE: hi karkat!
DAVE: youre one to talk asshole
DAVE: your loud ass snoring is why im down here
KARKAT: OH REALLY? MY ALLEGED SNORING IS WHY YOU TWO ARE DOING FLUSHED BULLSHIT DOWNSTAIRS? IS THAT IT?
DAVE: for the record
DAVE: nothing is going on here
DAVE: second of all
DAVE: bro i have this shit recorded on my phone right now
DAVE: do you wanna here it?
DAVE: cuz i can pull it up right fucking now
KARKAT: I DON’T WANT TO HEAR IT BECAUSE IT IS FAKE BULLSHIT. YOUR HEARING DRUMS ARE BROKEN AND I’M SURE A TRIP TO CROCKER WILL MAKE YOU STOP IMAGINING FAKE GROANS COMING FROM YOUR OWN HEAD.
JADE: im gonna be honest karkat im with dave on this one
JADE: you are kinda loud all the time in general
KARKAT: NO INPUT FROM THE PEANUT GALLERY HARLEY
KARKAT: THIS IS PURELY A DISCUSSION BETWEEN ME AND STRIDER
KARKAT: YOU ARE NOT FORCED TO SLEEP IN THE SAME RESPITEBLOCK AS THIS RAVING LUNATIC WHO HEARS THINGS THAT DON’T EXIST.
JADE: i meaaaaan
KARKAT: IF IT MEANS THIS ASSHOLE STOPS BITCHING I’M NOT AGAINST THE IDEA OF YOU TWO SWAPPING.
DAVE: bro you cant just say that
DAVE: this is our house man
DAVE: its our bedroom
KARKAT: WELL YOU SEEM VERY WELCOMING OF OUR SUPPOSED GUEST WHO PRACTICALLY LIVES WITH US AT THIS POINT
KARKAT: MAYBE YOU DO DESERVE COUCH DUTY FOR ALL YOUR BULLSHIT
DAVE: idk maybe you should take the couch given how much time you spend with your ass planted on it all waking hours of the day
KARKAT: AND YOU SLEEP IN THE SAME BEDROOM AS JADE WHO YOU’VE EXPLICITLY STATED YOU WANT TO HAVE SEPARATE LODGING FROM?
JADE: what????
DAVE: again youre misrepresenting me here
DAVE: ill buy you some pills or whatever to suppress your snore if you dont want to sleep in the living room
KARKAT: YES AND YOU’LL BITCH TO ME ABOUT HOW A CERTAIN SOMEONE CAN’T KEEP HER PAWS OFF YOU.
JADE: karkat why are you being mean :(
DAVE: yeah man whats your deal
DAVE: jade and i had our shit sorted out
DAVE: we have a dialogue and shit
Karkat looked at the two of them and eventually took a deep breath. His original anger had slowly softened to a much deeper regret.
KARKAT: SORRY…
KARKAT: I HAVEN’T BEEN SLEEPING WELL.
KARKAT: I PROBABLY SHOULDN’T BE RUNNING MY MOUTH IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT.
KARKAT: SORRY IF I WAS INSINUATING THAT YOU WERE A SLUT, JADE. YOU’RE FINE.
JADE: uh thanks karkat
JADE: i was kinda gonna forgive you anyways
KARKAT: I WONDER WH- I MEAN YEAH I FIGURED.
KARKAT: ALSO DAVE.
DAVE: sup
KARKAT: LET’S TRY THOSE PILLS.
KARKAT: I MIGHT ACTUALLY BE SNORING AND THAT’S PROBABLY FUCKING WITH MY SLEEP.
KARKAT: …
KARKAT: AND YOURS.
DAVE: sick
DAVE: ill drop by the pharmacy in the morning then
DAVE: i need to get more shit anyways
DAVE: getting a bit tired of alchemized food
KARKAT: YOU’RE JUST GOING TO BUY CUP RAMEN.
DAVE: listen real cup ramen is leagues better than alchemized ramen
JADE: i agree lol
KARKAT: WHATEVER. AS LONG AS YOU GET THOSE DAMN PILLS.
Karkat pulled out his phone and looked at the time before looking back at his friends.
KARKAT: I’M GOING BACK TO BED.
KARKAT: YOU TWO KEEP IT DOWN IF YOU’RE ACTUALLY PLANNING ON MAKING OUT.
DAVE: dude
DAVE: im gonna head back up in a sec
DAVE: jade probably wants more sleep too
Dave looked at Jade who took a moment to think. Was she really going to get more sleep? Or was the sudden bout of loneliness going to consume her once again and return her to the sobbing wreck that previously inhabited this room prior to Dave’s arrival.
JADE: i might go for a walk
JADE: who knows
Dave stood up and stretched.
DAVE: well do whatever
DAVE: i need some shut eye
He downed the rest of his apple juice bottle and slammed it on the coffee table next to the dozens of others just like it.
KARKAT: GOOD NIGHT, JADE.
KARKAT: ENJOY YOUR WALK IF YOU DO. SLEEP WELL IF YOU DON’T.
JADE: thank you! <3
DAVE: yeah night jade
DAVE: remember to talk to rose tomorrow kay?
JADE: will do!
JADE: good night dave! good night karkat!
Before her eyes, Karkat and Dave vanished upstairs, leaving her to sit in the dark living room alone once again. Unlike before, her heart felt full; something about talking with them filled her with a sense of happiness that she couldn’t properly describe.
Yes, she still had a crush on both of them. She had tried to get with them and even tried to get them with each other, but that was something that is mostly tabled for now. Though, it was still a struggle not to flirt with them.
Jade eventually stood up and stretched. What she needed right now was some fresh air. There was no need to try and fall asleep again when prior experience would dictate that her attempt would result in failure like always.
Slowly, she approached the front door where she slipped on her slippers. Her tail uncontrollably wagged as if there was some sort of excitement of going on a little walk. Despite it being years at this point, there were some sensations of being part dog she could never control.
When she grabbed the knob, she felt energy pulse through her body like electricity through a circuit. From the handle to her arm and back again, there was this feeling that something was happening that she couldn’t quite put her finger on.
It didn’t matter, however. What she needed more than anything right now was to breathe.