Chapter Text
"You are still here"
"of course , this one lives here"
Shen jiu stared down at the white haired man, his presence -quite litteraly- illuminating the dark cave
"Why am I allowed to enter"
"You will not like the answer" he replied, voice calm , devoid of emotions
That's how it always was , if shen jiu knew the word , he would have described it as an imitation of google fucking translate
"I have asked this before , let me ask this again , what is it that you wish"
".... I don't want to make any yet" Having said that , shen jiu turned his heels and went out of the cave
Silver eyes followed him , empty of any emotions, looking kind by default more than anything
That wasn't the first time shen jiu came
He couldn't make it the last if he tried
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"Why can't shizun get in"
"I do not want her to get in"
Shen jiu doesn't even let himself be surprised by how this man knew his shizun was a woman , he just gritted his teeth , too frustrated to care
"What if she think I am a liar now" he almost yell
"She would never" the white haired man replies with certainty
Shen jiu would love -would die- for it to be true
but he doesn't believe shen yuan
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The next time , shen jiu doesn't talk , so the cave is silent, because shen yuan only talk when spoken to
Or so he is making shen jiu believe
This visit is longer , shen yuan notices
If he noticed it in the first place , him with no sense of time , that means.....
He lift his head
Shen jiu is asleep
Shen yuan stares , how weird , the last time this human came , he was wary , and now he sleeps ?
Shen yuan's finger twitched
He hummed , contemplating , then the cave became warmer , shen yuan stopped the wind and cold from entering
When shen jiu woke up , the first thing he does is panic
He didn't mean to actually sleep ! his original plan was to go to the brothel , but some spoiled young master rented it for the night !
Shen jiu walked , pissed (sulking) and he found that cave , right in front of him
because of course he did
When last night's memory came to him, he fluttred his eyes open to look at the other man's way
Shen yuan was awake , it made shen jiu flinch
"I hate you" he yelled and ran away
Shen yuan remained unfazed , although something started to fill up his heart
Curiosity
Shen yuan is curious
he muse about it , he hadn't been curious about a human for so long , not after she di-
he frowned , suddenly on a bad mood , he didn't want to think anymore
he will just look forward to shen jiu's next visit
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"I am here"
shen yuan's expression doesn't change , even when he see the numourous books shen jiu bought with him
shen jiu only huffed , sat down putting his scroll away and starting to work on his homework
shen yuan stared at him , but when he felt the discomfort it caused the younger man , he turned his gaze away
shen jiu stayed for a long time , before getting up to return to his dorm
shen yuan observed him , noticing the bruise on his jaw
he doesn't comment about it , he heals it silently too
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"a-jiu is getting buillied" shen yuan say suddenly , when shen jiu comes back to study for the third time
shen jiu glares at him
"I don't remember telling you my name"
"your shizun called you that last time"
"you can hear outside ?"
some thing in shen yuan's face shifted
he bowed his head , looking at his hands that were always on his lap
"somewhat" he answers
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the next time he comes , shen yuan's eyes are closed , his breathing even
shen yuan was sleeping
shen jiu paused , he had never seen him sleep
his expression is even colder and emotionless , it's not softer , like it is with most people
shen jiu put down his things , he aproached the man , still sitting in an uptight position
he patted his shoulder lightly , trying to see if he can make shen yuan move in the gise of pretending to wake him up
when shen yuan didn't move an inch , like a statue carved from the ground , shen jiu tried to shake him
"what are you trying to do"
shen jiu raised his head , finding himself face to face with the white haired man
"I..."
shen yuan frowned , this was the most emotion he had seen of the man till now
"please don't touch me , I don't like being touched"
shen jiu's hands almost flew off , he stood up and walked away
shen yuan heard he mutred "I am sorry" he nodded to show he forgave , he wasn't used the contact , so the act made him uncomfortable , he should have raised the guard for his cave , but he didn't want to be sleeping at a time where shen jiu would want to hide , so he decided to let them down for him
he let out a sigh , oh well , it doesn't matter now
he go back to his usual attitude very quickly
"why are you staring ? I thought you would work"
"I-"
"have you decided on your wish"
"no"
"oh"
the qing jing peak lord was working on paper works when somone knocked at the door , she was startled , as she could normally feel the person before they reached her house , grabbing the hilt of her sword , she warrily opened the door
the stranger grabbed her sword just as it was about to reach their neck
"peak lord lu , may I ask a favor of you ?"
"you-" the peak lord glared , observing the man "what are you-?"
the white haired beauty stayed silent , as if he didn't know the answer to that question himself
"I am a spirit" he settled
"no , no you are not"
at this point , the peak lord already withdrew her sword
"it is what people call me"
".... what do you need then"
the next time shen jiu came to study , shen yuan was pleased to notice no new injuries on him
the peak lord listened to him after all , she probably put an end to the physical builying
this time , they trully didn't talk , and the moment shen jiu left
shen yuan coughed up blood
'ah..'
"I am a spirit"
"no , no you are not"
shen yuan looked at the blood on his hands
he was a devine being without a name- or more like , who used to be without a name
"what about shen ?" a young girl asked , softly "I am a shen too , you can be my gege" the girl had hazzel eyes , full of hope , a light she didn't have when she first stummbled upon his cave
for his name , the little girl proposed 'yuan' but promised she will find a better name , that he should give her more time , that she will ask her jiejies in the brothel , they will give her plenty of better ones
she died before she could tell him anything , a customer beat her up , she suffered greatly bedridden before succombing to her injuries and passing away , entering the cycle of reicarnation
she owed him a wish too , he think he heard it , he is quite unsure
'I wish you were my real brother , yuan-ge '
that hadn't been the first time he received a wish he couldn't give , this was the first time he felt so desperate , the first time he too , wanted that wish to be true
it had been a hundred year since then , yet he is back to doing the same mistake
althought ... the feeling shen jiu gives .. are not quite similar to what shen xing gave
how cruel was fate that gave them the same last name
