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On October 23rd, the infamous Instagram gossip account Deuxmoi posted the following blind item:
anon pls, overheard at the austin paddock a rumor that a certain f1 driver has a secret crush on another driver. he's trying to keep it on a down low but everyone's clocking him so bad. he's not exactly subtle about it.
The F1 grid is in shambles.
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04 Jun 2026
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During the Beatle years, John left a jumper at Paul's house, and Paul kept it and started to wear it. Now, in 1979, John sees a picture in a magazine of Denny Laine wearing the jumper. HIS jumper. John decides to go meet up with Wings to get it back.
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04 Jun 2026
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BREAKING NEWS: 2016 F1 CHAMPION NICO ROSBERG TO REPLACE TOTO WOLFF FROM 2024 ONWARDS
Lewis Hamilton drops his phone.
(or, what if nico was team principal in 2024?)
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01 Jun 2026
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“His poor dick must be stripped raw,” Nico says over the phone.
Mark makes a high despairing sound. He sounds vaguely like how Nico always imagined sheep to sound like. He doesn’t like it when they talk about Lewis’s dick.
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12 May 2026
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For reasons not explored, John and Paul suddenly find they can’t sleep unless they're near each other. After months of insomnia, they work out the problem during the Abbey Road sessions — and promptly start having the best sleep of their lives. It gives John a bit of whiplash, how easy it is to lose himself in Paul again.
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27 Apr 2026