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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Cliff Marleau suddenly materialises at the table next to Ilya. The girl he was with before is still on the floor, now dancing with some other girls, probably the friends she came here with. “You’re actually here?” He asks, disbelieving.

    “Hello, Ilya. How are you, Ilya. It’s so nice to see you, Ilya.” Ilya responds, sarcasm dripping off every word, sliding his phone back into his pocket.

    “Yeah, yeah, sure. But like, you’re here.” Marleau dismisses him with a wave of his hand, leaning over him to reach for one of the beers. “Thought for sure you’d be with Jane, man.”

    In Ilya’s ear, Shane moans, all drawn out and breathy. “Fuck, Ilya.”

    Ilya smirks at Marleau. “Jane is busy at the moment, Marly.”

    OR:

    Ilya is out celebrating a win and he keeps coming up with reasons to stay later and later. The team finds this unusual cause he’d usually be racing to leave to meet up with Montreal Girl™.

    The team’s a little worried thinking Ilya somehow fumbled Montreal Girl™ and agreed to go along with his ideas.

    Meanwhile, Shane’s tied up on the bed with a vibrating buttplug that Ilya’s controlling on his phone.

    Language:
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    27 Jun 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

    Summary

    A series of Ilya and Shane struggling to get people to take their relationship reveals very seriously at all.

    The fics in this series are set in the same universe, so these are the SAME Shane and Ilya. Although they can be read in any order, Totally Real Canadian Boyfriend™️ takes place roughly 5 years before Pour Decisions.

    Words:
    24,758
    Works:
    2
    Bookmarks:
    422

    26 Jun 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane Hollander ✅ @shanehollanderofficial 
    I’ve seen many publications over the years speculating on my own, and my husband’s, hockey stats and accolades in relation to our romantic relationship and when the public assumes it started. 

    We don’t owe this to anyone. But we’ve also been playing professional hockey for seventeen years and we’ve both run out of ahem, cares to give.

    On the right is a photograph from the behind the scenes of our joint CCM advertisement in July of 2010. This photo predates the hundreds of combined accomplishments listed on the left. 

    Oh, and it was also taken about six hours before our first kiss. 

    -----

    or; a year from retirement and out of fucks to give, shane reveals their timeline to twitter in response to the latest speculatory article on their relationship. hollanovs across the world rejoice, centaurs celebrate their beloved dads, and former teammates share the not-so-subtle clues they missed the first time.

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    25 Jun 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    “That’s not-” Shane starts, but he stops himself. Ilya tilts his head slightly in question, but Shane bites the inside of his cheek and then shakes his head slightly, cheeks flushing. “I do trust you,” Shane says.

    “But not with your car?” Ilya asks. “You are afraid I will drive all the boring out of it?”

    Shane rolls his eyes.

    “It’s a good car-” He starts in another refrain of one of his favorite summer songs.

    Ilya rolls them and pins his boyfriend under him before he has to hear about four wheel drive and gas mileage again.

    There are far better uses for Shane’s mouth, after all.

    (in which ilya learns that being a passenger in the car knocks shane tf out)

    Language:
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    1/1
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    24 Jun 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    It does mean missing out on things like barbeques and team dinners sometimes, but it’s not as if he would have been able to participate anyway. At this point in his life, risking someone not taking his allergies seriously would mean potentially missing games, which makes it unacceptable. Jackie always makes sure he has a dish or two that’s safe when he’s over at their house, but if he was going to be the one guy sitting and drinking ginger ale instead of taking part in sharing nachos or Korean barbeque or burgers or any other delicious thing he goes in knowing he can’t have anyway, there’s no point in making a fuss about it. He eats at home, has a drink with everyone else, and he calls it a day. Easy. Safe. Foolproof.

    But also the reason it doesn’t occur to him that he hasn’t actually told Ilya about any of his allergies until it becomes immediately relevant five days into being at his cottage together.

    (how ilya learns about shane's food allergies) (and how shane learns what it's like to have someone who always saves him a seat at the table) (and who also makes sure there's food he can eat on the table to start with)

    Language:
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    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
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    24 Jun 2026