aptlydapper



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  1. Public Bookmark *

    Where You Go, I Will Go (And Where You Stay, I Will Stay) by

    Fandoms: Minecraft (Video Game), Dream SMP  

    07 Feb 2022

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    Summary

    “New person!” Lala said behind him. “Overworlder!”
    Okay, so that’s why she was running. That was—Technoblade didn’t think their sounder had seen an overworlder since he’d been a shoat, at least. Several different bastion-locations ago. He made an interested sound, untangling the strider’s head-string from the rock.
    “He flew like a ghast!”
    The strider, now freed, nipped the fungus out of his hand and ambled off onto the lava. Bruh.
    “He’s part ghast, and he’s really short, he’s only just a tiny bit taller than me,” Lala said, delighted to be the bearer of so much information. “And his boots say he’s got gold and items to trade both, and he has gold hair and a flat face like a ghast, and he has lots of earrings but they don’t make any sense at all but he looks very rich, and he doesn’t know how to talk at all.”

    Or: First Meetings in the nether, culture clash, and the beginning of a friendship.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,575
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    6
    Comments:
    97
    Kudos:
    673
    Bookmarks:
    155
    Hits:
    4,339
    Bookmarked by aptlydapper

    05 Jun 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

    Now I'm On My Way (So Stand On The Edge Of The World With Me) by for fox_bell

    Fandoms: Dream SMP  

    05 Oct 2022

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    Summary

    Phil and Ranboo stared down at the little row of empty demitasse cups. “What the fuck,” Phil breathed. 

    “So we know the creature isn’t Enderian,” Ranboo said. “Cause it took the water.”

    “It also took the milk, and the plant milk, and the nether spice mix,” Phil said, pointing to the glasses in turn. “And it did it without disturbing the sweetner I put it around it.” He took a deep breath. “And it either did it without moving the glasses, or it fuckin’ put them back where they started.”

    “So it either flies or hovers?” Ranboo said hopefully. “That could be fun.” He considered. “Or really precise jumps.” 

    Phil looked again around the small storage room. There were boxes of cups and lids on the shelves, some dry goods and flimsy wraps for the sandwich station, the hot water heater and an air-monitoring setup from Life Support & Recycling, and not a lot of places to hide. “What the fuck,” he said again. 

    “Yeah, the spice mix is the real kicker,” Ranboo said. He pushed his glasses back up his nose. “That’s going to poison what, 98 percent of species?” 

    Or: I write the Humans Are Space Orcs story everyone's gotta write, only it's techno-centric and the syndicate is there.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,783
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Collections:
    6
    Comments:
    69
    Kudos:
    1,023
    Bookmarks:
    133
    Hits:
    7,869
    Bookmarked by aptlydapper

    05 Jun 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

    Sanctification by

    Fandoms: Dream SMP, Video Blogging RPF  

    25 Jul 2023

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    Summary

    Weapons must be perfect.

    A hidden fault or an unnoticed imbalance in the blade of a sword can be the difference between life and death on the battlefield. A blacksmith is careful with such things, watchful and alert during the forging of a weapon. There can be no imperfections. Certainly not if the weapon is a gift for the Lady of Death and her angel.

    Technoblade's trainers know this, and they shape him to be perfect.

    ~

    OR, child Techno is trained to be a living weapon and is given to Phil and Kristin, who don't realize that he is very much sentient. This causes problems.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    59,472
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Collections:
    4
    Comments:
    257
    Kudos:
    2,875
    Bookmarks:
    758
    Hits:
    30,393
    Bookmarked by aptlydapper

    05 Jun 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

    Technoblade’s Entirely Average Babysitting Gig by

    Fandoms: Dream SMP  

    20 May 2022

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    Summary

    “Perfect. Absolutely perfect.” Phil takes a scone, nodding. “Have you taken out any life insurance lately?”
    Techno only laughs. Phil laughs too. They laugh for approximately fifteen seconds. It’s weird.

    \\

    or: techno takes on a sketchy babysitting gig to make some money. he’s not entirely sure they’re not trying to murder him.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    34,267
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Collections:
    58
    Comments:
    798
    Kudos:
    10,056
    Bookmarks:
    2,412
    Hits:
    108,189
    Bookmarked by aptlydapper

    05 Jun 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

    Freaking Out In The Middle Of The Street (With The Complete Conviction Of Someone Who Has Never Had Anything Actually Really Bad Happen To Them) by

    Fandoms: Dream SMP, Video Blogging RPF  

    14 May 2023

    Tags
    Summary

    Techno scooped a couple plates off the couch and put them in a stack by the wall. “So, you found a guy.”
    “I sure did!” Wilbur said. “Go on. Guess where I found said guy.”
    “This is going to sound insane,” Techno said, sitting down.
    “I promise you it can’t be weirder than the truth, after the evening I’ve just had,” Wilbur said. He pulled a towel out of the laundry basket on the coffee table and sat on it. “I promise.”
    “That guy isn’t a historical reenactor, is he,” Techno said.
    “I am really beginning to think he is not, no,” Wilbur said, and put his head in his hands. “Technoblade, what am I going to do?”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    28,369
    Chapters:
    8/8
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    381
    Kudos:
    436
    Bookmarks:
    129
    Hits:
    4,928
    Bookmarked by aptlydapper

    04 Jun 2026