WhyDoIStillExist
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Recent works
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Sack of Flesh by WhyDoIStillExist
Fandoms: Criminal Minds (US TV), Naruto (Anime & Manga)
12 Oct 2024
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Summary
Shikamaru Nara.
In one universe he becomes the 7th Hokage’s advisor and lives a long and, for the most, a happy life, before dying surrounded by family and friends at an impressively old age for the Shinobi he was.
In another universe however, his life was cut short. He had just turned 20, just recently having gotten married and found out he would become a father. He dies cold and alone on the battlefield on a mission outside the village that was supposed to be easy. His last thoughts are those of regret.
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Meanwhile in another world a new mother cries as she holds the unmoving body of her newborn son. Until suddenly her little son regains color and flutters his eyes open for the first(?) time.
What.The.Fuck.[Prequel to _____]
Series
- Part 1 of A Ninja in The FBI?
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Summary
Basically Phoenix is having a really weird dream. That’s it.
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Sleepy me thought that disbarred Phoenix would definitely have weird existential dreamsSeries
- Part 3 of Random fics from random fandoms
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Summary
An unfinished fic that has been rotting in my notes app for some time.
Sasuke (trying) to cope with his whole world dying, basically.
Most likely will never be finished.
Summary and tags might change.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,223
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 7
- Hits:
- 127
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Summary
The only reason I’m alive is because I’m too much of a coward to slit my throat and finally put an end to it all.
Coward.
All I do is drown in self pity all day. Down a few bottles too many and play with the thought of drinking something stronger. And to drink just a bit too much…
OR
Shane is depressed and an alcoholic. Do you really need to know more?
Here is one of the many times Shane has been on the floor and thought for a bit too longSeries
- Part 2 of Random fics from random fandoms
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The milky seas flooding my canvas by WhyDoIStillExist for Rennll
Fandoms: Boruto: Naruto Next Generations, Naruto
09 Mar 2022
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Summary
Gift exchange -> Sweet Memories
Request by -> @Rennll
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Sometimes you need to get away from the loud and fast and get back to the slow and quiet.
Just for a moment.
Just long enough to tank energy for another busy week to come.
Just enough to make you feel calm and collected till next time.
Just so you can drown in long forgotten memories of a past you never expirenced.
Or
Mitsuki goes to the woods and paints by the river to tank some energy aaaand of course, to receive the well deserved comfort by good ol‘ Mother Nature! Plus. To remember all the memories in that magical place. That may or may not aren’t even Mitsuki‘s.
Recent series
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Random fics from random fandoms by WhyDoIStillExist
Fandom Heathers (1988), Heathers: The Musical - Murphy & O'Keefe, Stardew Valley (Video Game), 逆転裁判 | Gyakuten Saiban | Ace Attorney
31 Aug 2024
- Words:
- 3,214
- Works:
- 3
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A Ninja in The FBI? by WhyDoIStillExist
Fandom Criminal Minds (US TV), Naruto (Anime & Manga)
12 Oct 2024
Summary
[Both names start with S and both are smart. But while Spencer throws himself into work at the start of his journey, Shikamaru does the opposite.
Hence I decided I wanted to throw Shikamaru into the “real world” as Spencer!This series will be decided into at least two works. The first one is up and finished until further notice. It’s basically only like a layout. A prequel if you will.]
- Words:
- 4,748
- Works:
- 1
- Bookmarks:
- 3
Recent bookmarks
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The Best Laid Plans of Robins by Aleena_Pallaz
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Robin (Comics), Batman: Hush (2019), Batman: Under the Red Hood (2010)
30 Jun 2025
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Summary
Tim's dad is dead, killed by a boomerang to the chest, and Tim is an orphan now. He knows Bruce would adopt him if needed but he couldn't possibly impose himself on the Wayne's more than he already has. It's okay though, because he has a plan for this, he just needs someone to play the role of his estranged "Uncle Eddie".
Except... the guy he hires is weirdly concerned about his well being and Tim can't figure out why.
Meanwhile, Jason Todd is forced to reevaluate his plans for his debut as Red Hood, because, as it turns out, his replacement is a suicidal idiot who can't be trusted to stay out of trouble.
OR
Tim Drake fails to recognize Jason Todd, back from the dead, and hires him to be his Uncle Eddie to avoid getting adopted by Batman. Somehow this ruins everyone's plans.
Series
- Part 1 of The Best Laid Plans
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 76,532
- Chapters:
- 25/25
- Comments:
- 2,777
- Kudos:
- 7,253
- Bookmarks:
- 1,914
- Hits:
- 160,165
Bookmarked by WhyDoIStillExist
02 Jun 2026
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Summary
“The Red Hood has been good for Gotham,” Robin continued. “Crime in Park Row decreased by sixty one percent almost as soon as you showed up, and that’s even taking into account all the crime you commit. Drug overdoses have decreased by twenty two percent in adults and seventy nine percent in minors. Homeless minors are ninety two percent less likely to—”
“Kid,” Jason interrupted. “Enough statistics. What the hell is this about?”
Robin slowly lowered the tablet with his powerpoint presentation and looked up at Red Hood.
“You care about Gotham,” Robin summarised. “Gotham needs Batman. Batman is missing and so is Nightwing. We need you to fill in for Batman.”
“You want me to cover Batman’s patrols?” Jason clarified.
“No,” Robin said. “I want you to be Batman.”
Jason bluescreened.
(Or: Batman and Nightwing mysteriously disappear before Red Hood has even started antagonising them, Robin is desperate, Gotham needs Batman, and Red Hood is Batman-Shaped.)
Series
- Part 1 of The Right Substitution is Key
- Part 3 of Unhinged and Unrelated Jason Todd Content
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 34,416
- Chapters:
- 14/14
- Collections:
- 61
- Comments:
- 4,958
- Kudos:
- 17,059
- Bookmarks:
- 4,925
- Hits:
- 213,764
Bookmarked by WhyDoIStillExist
02 Jun 2026
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Jiang Cheng deserves a break by State_of_disquietude
Fandoms: 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù, 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV)
24 Jan 2024
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Summary
Jiang Cheng just wants a break! He has an entire cultivation clan to lead, has to stop his brat-of-a-nephew from getting into trouble, and deal with stubborn merchants and haughty clan leaders.
He just wants the Universe to cut him some slack, but the world hates him apparently because now:
A ghost is haunting Lotus Pier.
And to top it off--just the cherry on top-- Wei Wuxian has decided to visit, bringing Lan Wangji, their Wen-son and the Ghost General along.
Oh just what sort of family drama would ensue? *Could Jiang Cheng's life get any more chaotic than this?
(*A/n: Yes it can)
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When his spirit came back to the world, he was tied forever to his second home. At first, he was weak and his spirit could barely hold his form. But after 15 years of floating around the newly built Lotus Pier, he is finally strong enough to move objects and hold a somewhat solid form. And what does he do when he is able to do so? Haunt Lotus Pier, of course!Series
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autumn comes (when you're not yet done with the summer passing by) by nadiasna7
Fandoms: 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV), 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
06 Jul 2024
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Summary
“You have that annoying smile on your face,” Jiang Cheng grumbled, “and I do not want to know what you're thinking about.”
“Okay,” Wei Ying agreed easily and fell completely silent. Bastard.
Jiang Cheng stared resolutely at the softly swaying reeds and tried to get lost in the sounds of buzzing insects and muffled voices. It'd be so easy to doze off and wake up to a-jie's laughter and a plate of watermelon slices. It'd be perfect.
He didn't even last two fen.
“Fine, what is it?”
Wei Ying beamed at him.
***
It wasn't the person who grew up eating his a-jie's soup and swimming in the Lotus Pier lakes. He looked different, he felt different, and if the juniors just didn't know any better, Jiang Cheng still couldn’t wrap his head around how Lan Wangji could bear it. Looking at Wei Wuxian and seeing a stranger in his place.
Or: A story in two parts about family, bonds that transcend death itself, and feelings that only come with knowing someone inside out but no longer being able to speak their language fluently.
Series
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IQ 250 by rnbowshrbert
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), Spider-Man - All Media Types
05 Dec 2025
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Summary
“Wait kid!” And in that moment it came to him, “What if, what if we don’t forget you? What if we send you away?” Strange desperately called out.
“Mr.Strange… ” Peter had a sympathetic look in his eyes and Strange hated it. It wasn’t his life that was being destroyed, so why was Peter looking at him like the victim.
“Listen, I can send you somewhere there is no Peter Parker. There are an infinite number of universes, I can find one.” Strange said, more to himself than to Peter. And he knew this was dark magic, he knew he shouldn’t, but he didn’t care.
“I’ll send you there. Until I can fix this. Until I can bring you back.”
Or: Dr. Strange sends Peter to an alt universe where there are no Avengers, but they do have a thing called a Justice League. And sure Peter is homeless, but that doesn't stop him from being Spider-Man.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 114,708
- Chapters:
- 58/58
- Collections:
- 5
- Comments:
- 1,769
- Kudos:
- 10,675
- Bookmarks:
- 2,360
- Hits:
- 253,713
Bookmarked by WhyDoIStillExist
30 May 2026