Soursobs



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    "Why are you not scared?"

    "I am scared," Ilya admits. "I just am tired. Of hiding me. Of hiding you. Of hiding how much I love you. I want to go to the rink— how do you say it? Authenti."

    "Authentically," Shane supplies, automatically.

    "Yes. Authentically. I want to go to the rink authentically, as me," Ilya confirms.

    Ilya looks at Shane, pauses until Shane meets his eyes. "I want to say: I, Ilya Rozanov, love a man, and that man's name is Shane Hollander."

     

    -

    Or, sometimes it takes a little more time, and some courage, to be with the one you love.

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    04 Jun 2026

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    Ilya Rozanov is a single dad who's just trying to live his life and be the best dad he can. He never thought that love was for him until he has a chance encounter with pro hockey player Shane Hollander at a hotel bar in Vegas...

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    24/24
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    30 May 2026

  3. Public Bookmark 93

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    "There in the photo was a young man in a hammock with a serene lake behind him, bathed in an orange sunset. A book was open in his lap and he was smiling up at the camera, easy and relaxed. Ilya didn’t think he’d ever seen anyone look so effortlessly gorgeous in a pair of ratty sweatpants and a bleach-stained t-shirt. He also didn’t think he’d ever find a personal family photo of Shane Hollander, the up-and-coming hockey sensation from Canada who had gone missing in November of 2008, in a thrift shop in Boston."

    Ilya and Shane never met at world juniors because Shane vanished without a trace. Against all logic, he appears almost two years later in Ilya's dreams. Those dreams begin to blur the line between fiction and reality, becoming muddy and impossible to navigate. As Ilya falls in love with a dead man, he finds that he cares less and less about those lines. When the opportunity to solve the mystery and bring closure to Shane's parents presents itself, Ilya must face whatever reality may truly be, even if that means losing the love of his life for good.

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    28 May 2026

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    Loud beeps from his phone startled Ilya, and he slowed down, reaching for the device he’d put on the bar between his legs. Jane. He smiled to himself when he saw the notifications, and, checking Marlowe was absorbed in his own fitness, opened it quickly, smiling in anticipation of Shane's words.

    The smile was wiped off his face almost instantly.

    The blood drained from his face, and Ilya felt like the bottom had just fallen out of his world.

    *****

    Maybe he was naive, but Ilya always thought he had time. Time with Shane. Time to tell him what he truly meant to him.

    That, somehow, one way or another, Shane would always be there.

    But a text message late one night threatens to destroy the future that Ilya has spent the time carefully constructing in his mind.

    Maybe Shane wasn't always going to be there. That Shane would be cruelly snatched away from him before he had a chance to be honest.

    That he would be left behind. Alone.

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    26 May 2026

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    "Hi, solnyshko.”
    The Russian pet name set a firework off inside Shane's mind as he heard it cooed from behind him. The intonation was just as he remembered, but the voice was much deeper.

    He turned and felt himself short circuit. It took every ounce of willpower to not let his jaw drop cartoonishly to the floor. Shane would recognize his individual features anywhere, even after 5 years. But it was as if someone had snapped their fingers and the smug, silly Russian boy who had been attached to Shane's hip for 3 summers was transformed into some sort of fucking Adonis right before his eyes.

    “Ilya-” was all Shane managed before strong arms were wrapped around his waist and lifting him off the ground in a greeting all too familiar from years ago.

     

    OR
    When Shane Hollander & Ilya Rozanov spent their summers as teens in an elite hockey camp, they quickly became inseparable friends. But they lose touch when Shane moves on as a prospect for the NHL and Ilya for the KHL.

    Years later, Montreal makes a bold move to take the hottest player in the KHL. After hearing of the Russian's reputation, the Montreal Captain is tasked with keeping his old best friend and new teammate out of trouble.

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    25 May 2026