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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Draco Malfoy is not, necessarily, a good guy. Maybe he could have been, once, but he chose differently. Some (everyone) might say he chose wrong.

    After years in Azkaban and an extended house arrest sentence, he is released unto a world that somehow has only gotten worse while he was away… and rather than fix it, he falls right into step.

    Or does he?

     

    The Devil Works Hard

    or: How Draco Malfoy Finally Did The Right Thing (And Really Shouldn’t He Be Called The Chosen One?) You’re Welcome, World

    or: Who Needs Love Letters When Instead You Can Write Hate Notes - Draco Malfoy’s Guide to True Love

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    330,719
    Chapters:
    34/34
    Collections:
    4
    Comments:
    2,940
    Kudos:
    2,824
    Bookmarks:
    1,531
    Hits:
    195,476

    02 May 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    It’s 2008 and Draco Malfoy is a secret assassin. It's legitimate - he gets paid for it, and some higher ups in the Ministry (probably?) know he’s out there… killing people. He’s quite good, but that tracks with his dubious accounting of rights and wrongs and his penchant for self-preservation. During his downtime he does a great job of acting like a pureblood in penance... mostly by drinking and shagging his way into oblivion.

    This double life helps to numb Draco to the constant feelings of shame and guilt from his formative years in which he was an utter cunt- but everything is upended when his team (assassins can have coworkers, alright?) dies in action and he does not. Suspended and forced to go to therapy, Draco is adrift.

    When Hermione Granger re-enters the fray, their hateful relationship that was once fraught with swotty bickering (erm, and the occasional slur) is suddenly tense in a very different way.

    How will these two come together? How often will Theo say something terribly charming? Do we hate Ron or is Ron just, meh? Oh, and what’s going on with that one murderous witch who’s out to kill them all (forgot to mention that part…)?

    Find out all this and more in: A HARD ROW TO HOE!

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    250,248
    Chapters:
    30/30
    Collections:
    11
    Comments:
    2,902
    Kudos:
    7,173
    Bookmarks:
    4,243
    Hits:
    505,661

    30 Apr 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    “In my humble opinion there’s only three things that men should be and that is bloody, slutty, and pathetic.” And, on a good day, Draco Malfoy can be all three.

    When war heroine Hermione Granger and Azkaban-tattooed war criminal Draco Malfoy are forced to wed as part of Shacklebolt’s controversial Reconciliation Act, they openly fight the match and each other—their public brawls breathlessly reported by the press.

    Secretly, a deeply traumatized Draco delights in Hermione’s attention and pines for a real marriage with her—even as her forced proximity to the Black family magic irritates the cursed scar Bellatrix left on her arm, reminding her why she can never truly trust or forgive him. Then Hermione discovers that Draco’s blood will soothe the scar . . . and Draco is willing to trade his blood for her body.

    (With post-war blood purity politics, black market potioneers, Pansy Parkinson’s career advice, the Malfoys blackmailing Hermione’s Wizengamot opposition, BDE Neville Longbottom hunting Death Eaters, a slutty Theo Nott serving as Draco’s right-hand man, and Crookshanks loose in Malfoy Manor.)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    195,969
    Chapters:
    21/21
    Comments:
    7,502
    Kudos:
    31,528
    Bookmarks:
    12,502
    Hits:
    1,918,973

    06 Apr 2026

  4. Public Bookmark 26

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    Riza and Roy have been arguing for a week, the office radiator won't turn off, the paperwork has to get done, and there's only one desk.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,858
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    25
    Kudos:
    131
    Bookmarks:
    26
    Hits:
    1,923

    23 Sep 2025

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    It didn’t mean she liked him, or forgave him, or particularly wanted to live in the same castle. But Slughorn’s second retirement had been more of a necessity than a suggestion. Hermione wanted someone exceptional in the position more than she wanted someone she liked.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    54,166
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Collections:
    15
    Comments:
    276
    Kudos:
    4,209
    Bookmarks:
    1,342
    Hits:
    83,613

    12 Sep 2023