IAmAHat
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Summary
Cartman--armed with some emerging journalism concerning the pressing epidemic of schools providing furries with litter boxes--comes to Tweek with a plan to keep the poop perverts out of their bathrooms.
For the sake of Stripe's sanctity, Tweek must team up with the enemy and defend the last remaining bastion of hope amidst a depraved country.
[COMIC, CROSS-POSTED FROM @iamahat ON TUMBLR]
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4 Lawyers, 1 Detective, and 2 Birds Walk into a 24/7 Walmart by imhat (IAmAHat)
Fandoms: 逆転裁判 | Gyakuten Saiban | Ace Attorney
09 Aug 2022
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4 Lawyers, 1 Detective, and 2 Birds Walk into a 24/7 Walmart.
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a cavalry captain and a nun walk into a bar by imhat (IAmAHat) for Elizabethrzg
Fandoms: 原神 | Genshin Impact (Video Game)
14 Feb 2022
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Diluc left to attend another patron, and Kaeya was left alone with Rosaria’s sympathetic comfort.
“You’re really bad at this.”
“Great archons, I brought you here to be supportive.”
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Or, Diluc and Kaeya have a semi-conversation and begin the road to recovery (and Rosaria is there, too, I guess)
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clap, clap, you're a clever, clever cookie now by Aster_writes_sometimes, IAmAHat
Fandoms: Real Person Fiction, Minecraft (Video Game)
19 Jun 2021
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Five (5) people write one (1) fic. This is their story.
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what if.. i was a rock star.. and you were a holy deaconess... and we were both women ahaha... jk... unless by imhat (IAmAHat)
Fandoms: 原神 | Genshin Impact (Video Game)
05 May 2021
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“Hey, I don’t bite.”
Barbara looked down at the tiled street. Maybe, just maybe, if she didn’t move, the woman would move along and she would be spared from an eternity of embarrassment and ridicule and public humiliation. She closed her eyes tightly, praying to Barbatos more fervently than she ever conceived was possible that He may spare her.
But this was Liyue, and her God did not exist here.
“Ma’am…? Or--” the voice was closer.
“Ma’am, yes,” Barbara confirmed, believing a curse had been set upon her to speak. “Though I did not know dogs could learn the human dialect.”
There was a stagnant pause.
“You into bitches, then?”
Recent bookmarks
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The truest temptation comes not from the demon, but from the man left behind.
—Craig’s life changes dramatically the day his trusted friend and colleague asks him to perform an exorcism.
For better or worse, he isn’t sure. All he knows is that Tweek Tweak is making him question everything. Even his faith.
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When his English class essay about where he sees himself in fifteen years is met with a lot of backlash, he stays home for a week, feigning sick, to devise a plan.
His mission? Return dressed as a new student, and prove to everyone that he is a real boy. To Stan and the other boys, who don't take him seriously. To his parents and the school's teachers, who think he is too young to decide these things. And especially to Cartman, the son of a bitch.
And his name will be Kyle.
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“I’m, uh… sober,” Tweek announces because what the fuck else is he supposed to say to his ex-boyfriend that he ghosted 10 years ago to go do drugs?
Craig nods slowly. He wants to say congrats, or I’m proud of you, or how have you been sober for this fucking long and not contacted me at all you fucking asshole–
(In which Tweek emerges from his decade long absence from Craig’s life as a sober desert hippie and Craig is just an emotionally stunted mechanic in South Park. They try to figure it out.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 124,016
- Chapters:
- 9/12
- Comments:
- 586
- Kudos:
- 1,750
- Bookmarks:
- 480
- Hits:
- 57,175
Bookmarked by IAmAHat
15 Mar 2026
Bookmarker's Notes
I miss my best friend so much. It really really hit all of a sudden. Wish i had been better too. Fuck you. 444 ch 9
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Summary
Tweek Tweak could have easily come in and out of this world without anyone knowing he was even there. Unfortunately for Craig, the bonds created during those few short years weren’t going to break so easily.
Bookmarked by IAmAHat
24 May 2026
Bookmarker's Notes
"The EMTs didn’t move to stop him as he leaned down, wrapping his arms around Tweek and holding him close.
"If he was going to lose him, he wanted him to go out the way he had desperately wanted him to live; feeling safe and loved."
What a beautiful fucking story. Wow.
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Craig was supposed to be gone for the weekend. He'd asked his neighbour, Tweek, to feed his guinea pig while he was gone, even given him the spare key, until Clyde broke his leg and cancelled their plans.
When he got home it wasn't Tweek he met at the door, though.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 10,354
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 23
- Kudos:
- 750
- Bookmarks:
- 89
- Hits:
- 5,947
Bookmarked by IAmAHat
17 May 2026
Bookmarker's Notes
“You’re being especially talkative today , Clyde,” Craig hissed.
“Dad gave me so many painkillers before I left the house.”