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  1. Public Bookmark 10

    Summary

    A random universe where no radiation leak happens in which Lister and human-Rimmer have a lot of sex but are too stubborn to officially become a couple. Features Rimmer's white underwear and quite a lot of cigarettes.

    Words:
    9,158
    Works:
    5
    Bookmarks:
    10

    10 May 2026

  2. Public Bookmark 10

    Tags
    Summary

    Five times Jonathan Creek wrote a letter and one time he didn’t: a Jonathan/Maddy ship manifesto of sorts.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,488
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    5
    Kudos:
    102
    Bookmarks:
    10
    Hits:
    857

    07 Apr 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    CROWLEY: I try not to make a habit of gratitude, but I must give our appreciation to everyone out there who’s been listening and subscribing to The Ineffable Plan.
    AZIRAPHALE: Ooh, yes, we’ve become quite popular, haven’t we?
    CROWLEY: Yeah, just hit number eight on the advice charts … No advertising at all.
    AZIRAPHALE: Mm. How … miraculous.
    CROWLEY: … Aziraphale. You did not.

     

    ***

    Crowley and Aziraphale are very possibly the people least qualified, on the entire planet, to start up an advice podcast.

    But what else is there to do when the world isn’t ending anytime soon, you’re technically on indefinite sabbatical from your lifelong careers, and you need a plausible excuse to spend more time with your best friend who you’re definitely not, absolutely not, maybe just a little, actually maybe overwhelmingly in love with?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,541
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    9
    Comments:
    1,203
    Kudos:
    22,673
    Bookmarks:
    5,982
    Hits:
    148,281

    09 Jul 2024

  4. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “Mr. Crowley, I presume?” Aziraphale asked in lieu of an introduction, which was not forthcoming. The guy hadn’t even removed his sunglasses. Oh God, he had a tattoo on his face. Aziraphale wasn’t one to judge, but… what kind of gardener had a snake tattoo on his face?

    Now also available as a podfic from Literarion

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    33,059
    Chapters:
    11/11
    Collections:
    21
    Comments:
    1,922
    Kudos:
    9,784
    Bookmarks:
    3,058
    Hits:
    141,830

    01 Jul 2024

  5. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    As soon as Aubrey Thyme, psychotherapist, had opened her office door and seen her new client, Anthony J. Crowley, sitting in her waiting area, she was observing and assessing him. At first glance, she paid attention to the following:

    --His clothing was expensive and stylish;
    --He wore very strange but noticeable cologne;
    --His relationship to the seat he occupied could only, very loosely, be described as “sitting;”
    --He looked angry;
    --He was wearing sunglasses.

    What Aubrey Thyme, a professional, thought, upon first seeing her new client was: you’re going to be a fun one, aren’t you?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    99,423
    Chapters:
    16/16
    Collections:
    65
    Comments:
    6,917
    Kudos:
    33,387
    Bookmarks:
    11,935
    Hits:
    595,063

    10 Mar 2024

  6. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    He’s fine, though, he tells himself. He’s dealing with it. He’s dating girls, and using the excuse that he’s bad at it when Joey asks him why he never brings anyone home anymore. He’s fine.

    That is, until Joey kisses him at New Year’s, and everything changes.

    ___________

    Or: Chandler is in love with Joey and it's not the sort of thing you say out loud. Until, one day, it is

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,844
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    312
    Kudos:
    6,188
    Bookmarks:
    1,012
    Hits:
    51,740

    13 Jan 2024

  7. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    "All right, I know I'm going to regret asking this," Aziraphale says. "What exactly does this wager entail?"

    Crowley grins like the cat that not only got the cream but has absconded with the entire cow. He grabs the bottle and swigs straight from it despite Aziraphale's tut of disapproval.

     "The pot goes to whichever demon can get an angel into bed by the end of the evening."

     AKA The Fic That Tumblr Made Me Write. Heaven and Hell share a corporate party once per millennium. This time someone's had the bright idea of issuing a challenge to the demons of Hell. Crowley has no intention of missing the opportunity; Aziraphale's just enough of a bastard to make him work for it.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    17,381
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    621
    Kudos:
    11,593
    Bookmarks:
    2,919
    Hits:
    114,591

    13 Jun 2023

  8. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Music critic Aziraphale Fell is trying to break into the world of television, when he is signed to make a documentary about former-rockstar-turned-composer Anthony Crowley. It’s been eleven years since Aziraphale’s disastrous review of Crowley’s debut opera nipped his classical music career in the bud. He can only hope that Crowley will get over his admittedly justified grudge to make the TV show a success.

    A classical music sex comedy. Yes, really.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    47,125
    Chapters:
    13/13
    Collections:
    4
    Comments:
    1,433
    Kudos:
    2,169
    Bookmarks:
    572
    Hits:
    33,902

    15 Mar 2023

  9. Public Bookmark 13

    Tags
    Summary


    Image by goodomensficrecommendations on tumblr

    Aziraphale does a little reading about how to manage the snakes in his life.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,096
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    67
    Kudos:
    338
    Bookmarks:
    13
    Hits:
    2,350

    29 Dec 2022

  10. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary


    Image by goodomensficrecommendations on tumblr

    It's never a good idea to let an angel get lonely.

    Or, rather -- when Crowley needs a longer-than-usual nap after the apocalypse that wasn't, Aziraphale ends up getting a pet snake to keep him company in the shop. Upon waking, Crowley is not amused to find he now has competition for his angel's affections. A few feathers get ruffled in the ensuing kerfuffle.

    ——

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,390
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    374
    Kudos:
    3,045
    Bookmarks:
    373
    Hits:
    28,549

    27 Dec 2022

  11. Public Bookmark 83

    Tags
    Summary

    “You could very easily be poisoning these people. You might be attempting to weaken this timeline by feeding it a steady diet of anachronisms—softening it up in preparation for a larger plan. You might, Master, be capable of anything. Or at least of anything but running a tea shop.”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,007
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    39
    Kudos:
    305
    Bookmarks:
    83
    Hits:
    3,491

    27 Nov 2022

  12. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    In which Aziraphale makes more of an effort to be involved with Crowley's interests and hobbies.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    41,968
    Chapters:
    12/12
    Collections:
    8
    Comments:
    2,835
    Kudos:
    3,430
    Bookmarks:
    1,061
    Hits:
    57,456

    26 Jun 2022

  13. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    A how they got together story. Serves also as backstory to some of the events and characters mentioned in the KIdnapped!Q story. This takes place prior to that.
    Mostly an excuse to put them in a bed together.

    ------
    “Marry me.” Bond proposes flippantly.

    “Pfft! With this as dowry I could have the pick of you lot. 003 is front runner at the moment. You’ll have to try harder.” Q smiles at him sweetly.

    -------

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,934
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    38
    Kudos:
    865
    Bookmarks:
    122
    Hits:
    11,070

    30 May 2022

  14. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    In which temptations are accomplished, grand romantic gestures are made, and two ineffable co-stars only take four seasons of an award-winning television program to realize they’re on their own side (at last, at last.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    95,505
    Chapters:
    12/12
    Collections:
    11
    Comments:
    5,664
    Kudos:
    16,448
    Bookmarks:
    5,655
    Hits:
    361,234

    16 May 2022

  15. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    In which people keep mistaking Crowley and Aziraphale for a couple, and Aziraphale starts to wonder if there might be something to it.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,748
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Comments:
    3,583
    Kudos:
    49,517
    Bookmarks:
    7,949
    Hits:
    393,499

    02 Apr 2022

  16. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    In which Aziraphale has no intention of selling books to anyone at all, let alone this infuriatingly persistent customer. No matter how nice his cheekbones are...

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,070
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Collections:
    5
    Comments:
    468
    Kudos:
    2,793
    Bookmarks:
    553
    Hits:
    18,697

    30 Mar 2022

  17. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Yes, this version of 007 was a terrifyingly smart agent, and M wondered long and often whether it had been a good idea to promote him to the position. Usually, the title was the dangerous part - being 007 meant deadliness - but this time, M feared that a certain man with ice-blue eyes and scruffy blonde hair had dragged in more danger to the title than it had previously possessed

    Enter MI6's new Quartermaster: an unassuming, bespectacled genius with no mind for subterfuge but plenty of genius behind a dry smile. Curious 00-agents and young boffins don't always mix in predictable ways...

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    118,362
    Chapters:
    23/23
    Collections:
    19
    Comments:
    1,882
    Kudos:
    9,747
    Bookmarks:
    3,423
    Hits:
    288,583

    30 Dec 2021

  18. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    James Bond returns from a post-Skyfall mission with a concussion and a degree of memory loss. As he recovers, his legendary skills, charisma, and libido appear to be undamaged but there’s a great deal he simply can’t remember. 007’s colleagues at MI6—most specifically Tanner, Moneypenny, and Q—are encouraged to jog his slowly returning memory and help fill in the gaps in his knowledge. What Q can’t quite understand is why Bond, with his past conquests of countless women, now seems to be pursuing him.
    Slow-ish build and shifting POVs.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    84,830
    Chapters:
    21/21
    Comments:
    436
    Kudos:
    1,722
    Bookmarks:
    423
    Hits:
    52,094

    27 Dec 2021

  19. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    There are many interesting things in Q-branch.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,169
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    37
    Kudos:
    517
    Bookmarks:
    105
    Hits:
    6,147

    30 Nov 2021

  20. Public Bookmark 43

    Tags
    Summary

    After Douglas finds himself single again, he turns to the culinary arts for comfort. Martin notices that he’s put on a little padding…enthusiastically. For original prompt on cabinpres_fic, click here.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,560
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    292
    Bookmarks:
    43
    Hits:
    5,086

    28 Oct 2021

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