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Harry has a disasterous Summer with the Dursleys and is brought to Hogwarts early. In order to protect him, drastic measurs are taken and Harry finds himself living with one Severus Snape. AU Full Summary Inside
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Bookmarked by Dead_spiderweb
23 Jun 2026
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Harry Potter has never been good at lying under pressure, and his latest misstep lands him in deep trouble. Now he's the Lord of an extremely ancient, extremely Dark, previously extinct house of Necromancers. Lucky for him he has friends who can keep up and enemies that are determined to draw the wrong conclusions. Coming of age story about found family, terrifying your enemies, telling the man to shove it, and evil little abominations that just want ear scritches.
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Harry blinked. He had to stop himself from doing something very stupid, like screaming in a public place or trying to run and plowing into a wall.
Waiting a small distance from the exit to the elevator were the absolute last people he’d wanted to see. There stood Lucius Malfoy, looking about as composed as ever, though the sheen of sweat on the edges of his brow and the way his faint smile looked like it could shatter at any moment somewhat soured the image of perfect pureblood Lord. Next to him was Fudge, whose trembling hands squeezed each other white. There was a woman beside them, he didn’t know her but her stern and monocled form reminded him of a particularly cross McGonagall.
“Lord Mortis?” The Minister inquired
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Bookmarked by Dead_spiderweb
23 Jun 2026
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Harry Potter and the Stupid Fucking Triwizard Tournament by notatakenusername
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
02 Jul 2025
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“‘...issues an apology for what he has said and done.’” Snape finished, flicking the Daily Prophet shut and looking at Harry expectantly. Did he expect him to get upset?
“Borrrrringgg!” Harry blurted out, as Snape’s gaze fixated into a scowl.
“Boring, Potter? Boring? The most publicized newspaper berating you and talking about your pathetic love life is boring?” Snape sneered.
“Yeah, it kinda is,” Harry said as he fake yawned. “My love life isn't pathetic. I don’t even have a love life. Nor do you, and you probably won’t have one anytime soon if your ego continues to stay the same size as your nose.”
The Slytherins gaped at Harry, a few openly chuckling as Snape’s expression shifted into the constipation™ look. Ron abruptly laughed so hard he proceeded to accidentally knock over the bottle of stinksap onto Snape’s robes.
Harry finally burst out laughing. He really couldn’t help it this time.
Or,
The moment Harry James Potter hears his name come out of the stupid, obese, wine-glass doppelganger, (also known as the Goblet of Fire), he's done holding himself back. Cue the chaos that happens when he gives into his impulsive thoughts.
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- Part 1 of crack fics
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Bookmarked by Dead_spiderweb
23 Jun 2026
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This is my first fic so please leave comments!! I will probably edit it at some point, and I'll try to add a chapter every two weeks or so. I'm really bad at writing summaries so I'm going to try to write one using less than 15 words:
Harry hides something. Snape observes. The Slytherins want revenge. Draco finds himself fascinated.
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- 4/?
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Bookmarked by Dead_spiderweb
22 Jun 2026
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When Harry dies in the Forbidden Forest, he is surprised to wake up to Death greeting him. Death gives Harry a 'chance to make it better' and Harry, naive boy that he still is, decides not to further investigate what Death really means. Harry wakes up in a world similar to his own and realizes that he can make this world a better place than the one he left behind. He seizes the opportunity with a small promise hidden in the back of his mind. When he dies again, Death is going to hear a piece of his mind.
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- 8/?
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Bookmarked by Dead_spiderweb
22 Jun 2026

