THIS IS A WORK OF ART!!! i will absolutely be coming back to read this—i am beyond obsessed!
[Crosshair almost made himself snort with that. “And you sure look scared.” He retorted, mocking her high-pitched voice. His features fell into a stupid little grin, causing a weird ache to emerge from the depths of his chest. What in the actual Mother Teresa was wrong with him?
Crosshair rolled his eyes at his own stupidity.]
i’m in love with crosshair shocking himself with his own cruelness HAHA! i loved his internal dialogue and self-awareness as you referenced the cardiologist every time he felt Fondness, and his coldness then subsequent regret. it is his nature to be this way, but he can try everything to be gentle and patient, and you displayed that brilliantly. and omega loves him unconditionally despite his shortcomings and abrasive nature… that made me so emotional :’) what is omega if not giving Everybody a chance and the benefit of the doubt, no matter how much of a meanie they can be? she is kindness.
i LOVED the scene where crosshair toasted the man at the rifle station by hitting every duck one by one, and then how he got protective of omega when the guy was hassling her!! :’) also loved the inclusion of her bow & arrow in that, with his rifle!! and AZI!!!! THAT PART MADE ME CRY SERIOUSLY. you set it up so brilliantly by referencing TECH as her inspiration for choosing that plushie (plus the previous reference to how cross was surprised she chose the shooting station over “girly crap like horses”, also making me think this was just further solidifying her tomboyish ways) so i didn’t even think anything of the robot.. then you threw the curveball with the NAME SHE GAVE IT :’))) AZI IN MODERN BAD BATCH!! and the skull keychain was lovely and such a sweet touch!! loved how they both gave eachother their gifts <3
[His head turned back, ready to take a bite, as he noticed a piece from the bottom of his cotton candy to be missing. “Did you just?”
Crosshair detected Omega’s eager chews, hiding what she’d just done. Omega shook her head, biting into her own one. “Noooo. Already was like that.”]
MY HEART SOARED WHEN I READ THIS!! it gives me art inspiration of the two of them sitting on the carnival bench together with their green & pink cotton candies, and omega with a green tint around her mouth + the missing piece of cotton candy at the bottom of cross’s HAHAHA! just so cute and such a little sibling thing to do!
[Crosshair must say, that might have been the best waste of ten dollars ever. Subconsciously, he clutched his chest. Somewhere deep down, the fluttery feeling grew.
Immediately panicked, Omega noticed the change on his face. “What’s happening?” Her chin gave in to the tiniest wobble. “Are you sick?”]
AAAAHH THIS PART GOT ME GOOD :’) omega is such a sweet and nurturing little sister, and it is so like her to immediately catch onto any shift in people’s (especially her brothers’) demeanor and expression, and for cross it makes perfect sense that his unfamiliar fondness would be interpreted as him feeling ill. omega you sweet little empath, always so concerned with others’ wellbeing<3
[Crosshair rolled his eyes, almost incapable of smothering his stupid grin. “I am truly, deeply sorry Hunter, please forgive me.” He begged, sarcasm filling the empty space between the words. He slid down to his knees, hands folded, looking up. Head turned to the side, he granted Omega a short wink.
She nodded approvingly, giggles rising to the top, smothered by the resolution to keep her mouth closed.
“What is going on? What are you sorry for?” Hunter’s vision lowered, looking at Omega as if she just lost her mind. Crosshair chimed in, gentle belly laughs warming his cold, dead insides to body temperature.
Crosshair arose, mustering an indifferent shrug. “My existence I suppose.”]
THIS MADE ME CACKLEEE HAHAHA i can literally see this scene existing in the bad batch series. it embodies their dynamic in such a hilarious and clever way—the body language and tone you described from the both of them is PERFECT. i read it in their voice so naturally, like it just felt like an actual scene i was watching. that entire last sequence, actually, but particularly those lines. hunter’s dad-talk there as well was just amazing. VERY NICE JOB!!
also the way you wrote crosshair grabbing omega’s hood to keep her from wandering off LOLLL that made me giggle. i have definitely done that with my younger siblings, and i have definitely been grabbed that way by my older siblings + my parents. that made me think of an old monkey harness/leash that my parents would use for me and my sister, especially when we would go to fairs or museums like crosshair and omega in this story! the hood though is the classic method used by people like crosshair to children like omega… just so perfect and hilarious
but then she held his hand after he helped her off the bench… :’) THAT WAS SO SWEET! and the way she skipped next to him AAAH just too precious!!!
[Clutched, their hands swung back and forth, Omega opting for little skips instead of her initial downbeat shuffling. “Hunter is nice. I like him.”
Crosshair’s windpipe edged up. He didn’t expect the statement to feel like… this. He wasn’t a lot of people’s favorite person. Why did he even fool himself? “Sure. Try living with him for twenty-five years. Then we’ll talk.” For the second time that day, his statement came out way too snarky. As a result, Omega abruptly stopped her skipping, feet rooted to the spot. Crosshair rolled his eyes, regret seeping through his intestines. “Look- I didn’t mean it like that.”
Instead of taking notice of what he’d said, Omega let go of his hand. She grew silent, eyes drawn into slits, a frown creasing her forehead. “I think you're nice too, you know. But not if you’re being a meanie.”]
mannnn this part got me too :(( cross’s insecurities make me emotional bc he portrays himself as very cocky and sure of himself, which he IS, but as a human he has human insecurities and they hurt a little extra when you can see them seep through his ice barrier. that made this segment very effective and impactful to me, even when it was eased by the comedic aspect of the “words spoken with the intention to hurt others are always insults” bit hahaha
and last but not least, the objective of this entire story… THE LONG-AWAITED HUG!!! :’D i definitely cried a little when it finally happened. that was soooo rewarding, and i enjoyed every bit that led up to that moment!!!
[Crosshair's clueless hands swept up and down her spine, reeling in the feeling that whatever his chest had been trying to execute here, it probably wasn’t warranted. All his life, Crosshair tried to accept the love he thought he deserved. Behaving mostly moody didn’t leave that much love to receive in return. But there Omega was, coming out of nowhere. She pulled a 180, turning his life around and showing him that deep affection might not have been a matter of earn at all. Omega liked him just as he was, and he would make a fool out of himself if he didn’t think that to be one of the coolest things in the entire universe.]
omega was essential in the batch’s lives, teaching each of the boys crucial lessons and helping them to grow and understand humanity in ways they may have never learned before. here you beautifully wrote one of the largest ways omega could have an impact in crosshair, and i just think that is incredible and so so moving :’) it makes me think of the line hera said to omega, “keep an eye on your brothers… they need it.” that quote resonated with me a lot, especially when it was followed closely by omega saving crosshair from the water with her bow & arrow. that was only one example of the extensive reasons and ways that the boys need omega as much as she needs them. <3 i am positively thrilled with how you demonstrated that in this fic.
this entire work is just beautiful, exemplary, perfect, impeccable, i ADORE everything about this. your writing is truly something special, and you capture each of the batch’s essence flawlessly. thank you SO much for sharing this masterpiece, i without a doubt will be returning to reread this indefinitely<33 i also stand by that there are all kinds of sweet art ideas that could come out of this!!!
Woah woah woah, Okay first off: THANK YOU SO MUCH for your wonderful comment!!! This was incredibly flattering to read and I agree with everything you’ve said about Omega’s brothers needing her just as much as she needs them. I always thought Omega teaches each of them something special. (Hunter: to be less worried, Tech: to be more emotionally available, Echo: the courage to share his misery from time to time, Wrecker: to not be intimidated by things he cannot understand at first, and Crosshair: nothing bad happens if he lets his guard down from time to time :) )
[omega was essential in the batch’s lives, teaching each of the boys crucial lessons and helping them to grow and understand humanity in ways they may have never learned before.] 1000000000000000% agreed!!
Crosshair always struck me as a hard shell with a soft interior. He thinks he is incredibly confident and super harsh but sometimes, there’s something in there… We can even see him proud of his sibling in the show (Clone wars, he’s so proud at wrecker lifting the ship I’m like… dude… <33)
And yes absolutely. Omega is just such an interesting individual. She’s just so empathetic and notices emotions and their changes so so well… Everybody gets their try and she senses if someone’s honest and good deep down. Like you said: She’s just true kindness…
AZI was the only thing missing In my stories so far :D So I wanted to incorporate him so bad especially since he is such a detrimental influence for Omega.
[it gives me art inspiration of the two of them sitting on the carnival bench together with their green & pink cotton candies, and omega with a green tint around her mouth + the missing piece of cotton candy at the bottom of cross’s HAHAHA! just so cute and such a little sibling thing to do!] OMG I would die to see that x.x, just swoon and never get on my two feet again!! ^^
Ahhhh that you read it in their voices makes me so so happy!! Asjgpsjfhsid That’s all I could ever hope for!!
Yeah, the hood thing is something my dad did all the time :D I could never go where I wanted… *Hrmpf* ^^
Wow, I’m just so floored by your incredible response. I’m short of sobbing. This was so so nice to read and I’ll copy paste this in my word file to read again if I ever get the feeling nothing is good enough. (Happens… happens a lot ^^)
I’m so happy I could make you smile, laugh, ect. Comments like yours just hold such a special place in my heart and I am beyond grateful for you sharing your thoughts and feelings and THE HOURS IT MUST’VE TAKEN YOU TO WRITE THIS… Like whoa. But I’m so thankful. *rolls in ball, cries…*
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candysugar Wed 06 Apr 2022 02:50PM UTC
Last Edited Wed 06 Apr 2022 02:57PM UTC
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CallMe_XO Wed 06 Apr 2022 05:26PM UTC
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