Comment on Scrambled Eggs

  1. Nobodythehope Tue 21 Sep 2021 05:30PM UTC

    Critique: Tim's name is easy to explain and would be excepted by Ra's more readily than you would think as Timothy is of the book (Bible, Qoran, Torha ), and Ra's started life as a Muslim doctor. Batman actually speaks in cannon a minimum of 19 languages and is one of the two smartest men on earth. you missed the Helena's. Helena Bertinelli the second huntress and Helena Wayne the original (good) Huntress and the bio daughter of Bruce and Selina from earth-2/Two. Why did Cassandra have to become robin? It would make more sense for the girls to have still become Batgirls. =) other than these you nailed them. robin came from robin hood instead of the bird.

    Review: Great Oneshot. I saw this was only your second bat-fam fic, so I critiqued some things that are not seemingly widely known. This gave me an idea for a fic of my own I will be giving credit where credit is due.

    great fic keep up the good work.

    Last Edited Tue 21 Sep 2021 05:30PM UTC

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    1. SpaceWall Tue 21 Sep 2021 05:43PM UTC

      A woman in a yellow dress with a blank notebook and quill, experiencing ennui while looking down on the city of Paris

      Yeah I just don’t think Ra’s would be big on the glory of god, and regardless of its origins, Timothy now sounds very much like a common name. Damien’s name-meaning of 'to master' is much more in keeping with the League’s whole vibe. I did leave out both Helena and also Duke, but honestly I’ve never seen anybody include Helena in one of these. She seems to be under-repped in the fandom in general. I thought about putting her in but honestly I don’t fully get her origin story and I was too lazy to learn. I made Cassandra Robin instead of Batgirl because this Cassandra /is/ Robin. She wears the bright circus costume and does flips and is the kind, fun counterpoint to Batman, even if she does it in a quieter way than Dick did. Batgirl (or in this case Bluebird), has a different meaning and a different legacy.

      I’m glad you liked it and I do appreciate your critiques. Let me know when you’ve written your fic, I’d love to read it!

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      1. Nobodythehope Tue 21 Sep 2021 06:01PM UTC

        That's the kind of response I like to see. =).

        I am a bit of a big bat fam fan and do a lot of looking into for my fics as I have too much spare time on my hands. so I know a bit more than the casual fan. Batgirl is just as high energy and spunky as robin, especially in say The Batman (available on HBO max) cartoon.

        If you ever feel like learning more about Helena's and have time on your hands suggest a Dc Universe Infinite trial subscription. For Helena Bertinelli (current cannon), you read the first five-ish issues of Batgirl and the Birds of Prey and for Helena Wayne DC Super-Stars #17, Huntress vol 3(it's the 2011 series).
        depends on how you interpret Ra's between the pages. I view him as a more charismatic leader like Mobile suit gundams Char Aznable.
        I am actually already starting on chapter one of it its going to be different as I am going to really play around with canon more than you did and planing a multi-chapter fic. so I will let you know when I get it posted. =).

        I think i will have flashbacks as i introduce more charectors.

        Last Edited Tue 21 Sep 2021 06:04PM UTC

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        1. SpaceWall Wed 22 Sep 2021 12:23AM UTC

          A woman in a yellow dress with a blank notebook and quill, experiencing ennui while looking down on the city of Paris

          I look forward to it!

          Just as an FYI tho, both of your comments came across as a little patronizing/gatekeeping in tone. I’m just doing this for free and for fun and just because I make different creative choices than you would and care about different parts of canon doesn’t mean my work is bad or wrong. I’m not mad, but it does hurt my feelings a little bit to get a comment on something I worked on where all the feedback is about things I didn’t choose to do rather than things I did (or is negative about the things I did). I put a lot of time and emotional effort into my work and the only compensation I get for it is your comments + kudos so I’m probably a little more emotionally hurt by them than I would if it was something I hadn’t tried as hard on.

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          1. Nobodythehope Wed 22 Sep 2021 12:33AM UTC

            I am honestly sorry for my tone it was not my intention. So thank you for mentioning it. I forget I can be way too blunt at times and need to work on proofreading my comments. I need to state again it was very enjoyable and I did love the story.

            Last Edited Wed 22 Sep 2021 12:33AM UTC

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            1. SpaceWall Wed 22 Sep 2021 01:07AM UTC

              A woman in a yellow dress with a blank notebook and quill, experiencing ennui while looking down on the city of Paris

              I really appreciate you saying that and taking it so well. I was really nervous to say anything because I never know how people on the internet are going to react to this kind of this

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              1. Nobodythehope Wed 22 Sep 2021 01:10AM UTC

                I am glad to hear that and know how that can go.

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                1. SpaceWall Wed 22 Sep 2021 01:13AM UTC

                  A woman in a yellow dress with a blank notebook and quill, experiencing ennui while looking down on the city of Paris

                  Yeah I probably care a little too much what strangers on the internet think of my work

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                  1. Nobodythehope Wed 22 Sep 2021 01:16AM UTC

                    Nothing wrong with that I am the same way. you pour your time, effort, and heart into something and want it to be liked and enjoyed. it can be hurtful when a negative comment is made.

                    Last Edited Wed 22 Sep 2021 01:17AM UTC

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                    1. SpaceWall Wed 22 Sep 2021 01:19AM UTC

                      A woman in a yellow dress with a blank notebook and quill, experiencing ennui while looking down on the city of Paris

                      You get me!

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                      1. Nobodythehope Wed 22 Sep 2021 01:20AM UTC

                        =)

                        Ps i asked why you did not have the girls as batgirls because I was curious.

                        Last Edited Wed 22 Sep 2021 01:27AM UTC

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                        1. SpaceWall Wed 22 Sep 2021 02:10AM UTC

                          A woman in a yellow dress with a blank notebook and quill, experiencing ennui while looking down on the city of Paris

                          So I don’t really see any reason why, if Cass was the first + the one who had the Grayson upbringing etc. she wouldn’t end up as Robin. I mean, even in canon, Robin isn’t a male-only title (Steph is Robin), so why should Cass be batgirl instead? The whole /premise/ of the fic is that Cass is (partially) Dick, so Cass is Robin and then Nightwing, and Barbara, who is partially Jason, is Robin after her. I actually thought about making Jason and Dick both be ‘Batboy', but I decided it would be out of character for Jason to willingly answer to that, so I gave him a new title instead.

                          I have trouble answering your question because to me Cass being Robin is so fundamental to this AU that asking that is sort of like asking why Dick was Robin. It’s just.... part of the universe that I made?

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                          1. Nobodythehope Wed 22 Sep 2021 02:19AM UTC

                            Makes sense and nothing wrong with that.

                            PS the behind scenes reason they chose robin was his creator was a fan of Robin Hood.

                            Last Edited Wed 22 Sep 2021 02:21AM UTC

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                            1. SpaceWall Wed 22 Sep 2021 02:49AM UTC

                              A woman in a yellow dress with a blank notebook and quill, experiencing ennui while looking down on the city of Paris

                              I was about to say “AU where Dick really goes for the Robin Hood aesthetic” but then I remembered that Green Arrow already exists lol

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                              1. Nobodythehope Wed 22 Sep 2021 03:18AM UTC

                                dick was made in 1940 Green arrow 1941 and by a different comic company as a batman knockoff =)) so that could actually work if framed right.

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                                1. SpaceWall Wed 22 Sep 2021 03:20AM UTC

                                  A woman in a yellow dress with a blank notebook and quill, experiencing ennui while looking down on the city of Paris

                                  AU but not of the DC, AU of our universe where they went with a more archery-themed concept for Robin and Green Arrow doesn’t exist

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