Archive of Our Own

Disclaimer: If you know it, I fail to own it. 

This takes place between the scene in the cafe and when Tony bursts into Steve’s apartment in North to the Future.

“We must go on a date.”

Steve blinked, asking rather dumbly and inarticulately, “Huh?”

Loki leveled him with a look that lacked the usual fondness Loki wore when Steve was being exceptionally dense. (Granted, Steve was a little slow on the uptake often.) 

(Though, he didn’t have his own patented Loki-Thinks-You’re-Stupid look like Clint and Tony did.) 

(Well, maybe he did, he just failed to realize he’d gained his own unique Loki-Thinks-I’m-Stupid look because he got it so often?) 

“We are dating, Steven.”

“We are?”

“Are we not?”

“I don’t know,” Steve said, rubbing the back of his neck as his eyes darted around the terminal. 

Why did Loki pick an airport to have this discussion? They were seated in the Ted Stevens International Airport and the sun hadn’t even popped up over the mountains to the east of the city. The sky was finally lightening, but there was no sign of the actual sun as of yet. 

“I understand you are from a different era and people were not kind—”

“Loki,” Steve said in a warning tone. “Not here.”

Loki gave Steve a look of haughtiness before turning away and staring out the large windows that showcased the beautiful panoramic view of Anchorage and the surrounding mountain range. Steve was sure there was no place you could go in Alaska that didn’t offer some sort of stunning panorama. Even standing in downtown Anchorage the snowcapped mountains were visible. 

“Then where, Steven? This trip is the first time you’ve been in public with me since I arrived two weeks ago,” Loki said, doing his best to hide behind a blank mask. 

Steve saw through it and kicked himself mentally for failing to realize Loki would— oh, Steve had no idea how to put it. Loki was by no means unobservant, thus likely had noticed how people in relationships behaved while in public. Loki might be an alien, but he was no idiot alien. 

Steve raked a hand through his hair, then closed his eyes as he buried his face in his hands. 

“All I am requesting is that we have dinner,” Loki said in a soft tone. “Steven, look at me and stop hiding behind those hands.”

The way Loki uttered those hands made Steve blush. He did as Loki requested and lifted his face out of his hands, his ears turning red to match his cheeks. 

He wanted to chop off his hands and he wasn’t aware they had done anything. 

Recently.

Like in the last few days. 

“What are you thinking about? You’re red,” Loki said, amusement painting his tone in contrast to his serious expression. 

“N-N-Nothing,” Steve stuttered. “You want to go to dinner? Didn’t we do that?”

“With others,” Loki said, losing any hint of humor in his features. “Each meal we’ve dined outside the confines of your apartment have been with an escort. I wasn’t aware one still needed an escort to go on dates. Not that Clint made the ideal chaperone.”

Steve cringed at the memory of the meal with Clint. The three had gone to the greasy spoon diner Clint adored near Steve’s apartment. At first, Steve worried Loki would turn up his nose and refuse to enter, but he went right in, ate a greasy burger, and gave Clint more fodder for his never ending Let’s Tease Steve Till He’s A Tomato campaign. 

Steve peeked at Loki, who was once again staring out the window as if nothing was amiss. Steve sighed. There was a stunning person sitting next to him in the airport who was…well, was interested in Steve (of all people) and Steve was acting like a total idiot. 

“I’m not requesting to maul you in public that like couple,” Loki said, indicating with a rather thoughtless wave of a hand to his right. “I prefer we keep that to ourselves.”

Steve followed where Loki had specified to see a young couple making out like it was going to go out of style. They broke apart for a moment and the girl plastered herself to the boy. Steve’s blush traveled from his face and headed for his chest at the memory of Loki clinging him in a similar manner just that morning. (Was it really morning when they got up? The sun wasn’t even up yet.) 

Loki and Steve hadn’t done anything passed some kissing and brushing bare skin with hands, but since Loki had yet to find an apartment, he spent the nights at Steve’s. At first he slept on the couch, but the couch was way too short for the six foot two Loki, so Steve said they could share the bed. 

Or stuttered, stammered, and never actually got the actual words out. 

However, since this invitation, Loki spent the night in the bed with Steve, always starting out on his own side. Steve, who almost alway awoke before Loki, found Loki each morning wrapped around him like langur monkey. Steve didn’t mind. He rather liked waking up to find himself trapped in bed by Loki’s long, pale limbs. 

“You are ashamed.”

Steve startled. “What?”

“Of me or us.”

Steve stared wide eyed at Loki, unsure what he could say that would not end with a rather irate Loki. (Not that he currently had a placid Loki.) 

Loki knew this was the wrong time and place to discuss the subject, but he wasn’t interested in sitting through a seven hour plane ride without the matter dealt with. It had been bothering him since Jess had asked, “So, you dating Steve? Is he heaping you with roses and dinners?”

Steve wasn’t heaping Loki with any of those. Taking in the state of his face, Jess realized something that Loki had clearly missed. 

“You’ve got no idea what dating means here on Midgard, do you?”

Jess explained the concept and it sounded very acceptable to Loki. It was a simple request: dinner. Just the two of them. Alone. Somewhere nice. (Not that Loki minded the diner Clint had taken them, but he did crave something finer.) 

“And be nice about it, Lo. Steve’s from another era,” Jess had reminded him. 

Loki had assured her he would be kind. He glanced at the man next to him, taking in the worried expression on the blonde’s face.

“Steven,” Loki sighed, “it’s only dinner. Two men are allowed to dine together, are they not? That is not frowned upon in the make-believe world Captain America resides within?”

Loki wasn’t pleased with the fact Fury had bluntly told Steve that while he did not care what Steve did in private, as Captain America his life wasn’t his. Captain America would never be connected with Loki of Asgard in any manner other than to fight him and save the Earth from subjugation. 

(Nor would he be connected with Loki Laufey-Odinson, as he was a guy and looked exactly like Loki of Asgard.) 

(Loki was not happy no one had put out there that Loki, while the bad guy, had also been a good guy. He was not a one dimensional villain, nor good guy.)

“You want to go on a date?” Steve asked, his voice a little high. He rubbed the back of his neck. 

Loki waited for Steve to look around to make sure no one was eavesdropping, or watching, but Steve’s crystal blue eyes remained locked on Loki’s green ones. 

Inside, Loki grinned. 

“Dates are things…I…I never went on a date that wasn’t set up by Bucky,” Steve finally admitted. “And, what do people do on dates these days? And…and…”

“And what?”

Steve felt his cheeks color further. He looked away from Loki and over the demigod’s shoulder as the sky behind him continued to pink with the coming day. 

“Is it because of my gender? I could,” Loki paused, leaning closer and said, “turn into a woman if that would make you more comfortable. I tend to think of myself as male, but I have the ability to become female.”

“What?” Steve screeched. “That’s not it. What? No. How?”

“Magic,” Loki said as if Steve was stupid. “While my magic is bound, my shape shifting is separate, as I am not currently blue.” 

Steve gawked at Loki, who folded his arms across his chest and gave Steve a look that froze Steve’s insides. 

“If my becoming a different gender will not aid, then what, Steven?” 

“I’ve never…asked…or been….asked, and well, uh…”

“Ask me,” Loki ordered.

Steve’s eyes snapped back to Loki and he stared at him in confusion. 

“Ask me. I assure you I will not turn you down.”

“But, you already asked me.”

“Ask me,” Loki ordered, his tone daring Steve not to obey. 

“Okay, I will ask you,” Steve allowed, feeling a combination of relief, panic, and something else he wasn’t sure he could describe. “But, I want to plan something before I ask you. I don’t…I need to figure out what to do.” 

“Fine.”

Loki turned away, staring straight ahead with a blank expression on his face. 

Steve’s mind jumped from one thing to another, desperate to figure out how to make this right, how to be normal, how to be who he wanted to be, do what he wanted, and not upset the world. 

At some point, the world was likely to be upset. It was unavoidable. Not everyone could be happy. But, there was one person seated next to Steve who would likely be thrilled if Steve took him out to dinner at a nice restaurant in Manhattan. 

Steve really wanted to do that.

“Hold on. I’ll be right back.” 

Loki watched Steve hurry off, wondering where he was going. Loki dragged his carry-on closer and pulled out the tablet Stark had gifted Loki upon his arrival back on Midgard. Flicking it to life with his finger, he pulled up the book he’d downloaded and began to read. He stopped when he felt Steve sit back down. 

“Okay. Loki, would you go to dinner with me tomorrow evening?” Steve asked, his eyes looking a little timid and unsure. “I know this great little restaurant. It’s in Manhattan and according to Tony, it’s still there.” 

Loki quirked an eyebrow.

“Restaurants come and go in New York City,” Steve explained hurridly. “I wasn’t sure if it was still there, but it is.”

“You’ve been before?”

“In another life. It’s run by the grandkids now,” Steve said, grimacing at the reminder of those lost years. 

Loki reached across the space between them and lightly put his hand on Steve bare forearm (Steve had removed his coat and rolled up his shirtsleeves as the airport (as well as everywhere else they’d gone within Anchorage) liked to keep the heat on BOILING with no regards to the fact everyone baked to death when dressed for winter). 

“It sounds wonderful, Steven,” Loki said, quickly withdrawing his hand before it could make Steve uncomfortable. 

Steve reached out before Loki had fully gotten his own hand back to his own personal space and grabbed it. 

“So, that’s a yes?” Steve asked, gripping Loki’s hand. If he’d not been who he was, Steve would have likely broken his hand.

“Of course, Steven,” Loki said, giving into the urge to smile at the man before him. 

Steve might occasionally frustrate Loki, but it was worth all the frustration in the world when Loki noticed within the depth of those blue eyes something he’d never seen within anyone else’s eyes. 

Steve squeezed Loki’s hand, loosened his death grip, smiled (a breath taking smile), and said, “Good. I made reservations for seven. Tony said that was too early for a date, but we tend to go to bed at ten.” 

Steve said the last sentence absently, like it was completely wonted. Loki marveled at the man who got so flustered by being asked to go on a date by a man, yet could casually state he and the same man went to bed (together) at a certain time. 

Loki glanced over Steve’s shoulders at the older woman who had taken the seat next to them. She was pretending to read a book, a small smile on her lips indicating she’d clearly been eavesdropping on their conversation. She glanced over, caught Loki looking at her, and winked. 

Loki turned his gaze back to Steve. The woman was younger than Steve would have been if he’d not been trapped in the ice for seventy years, but Loki was sure she was old enough to remember when a relationship such as Loki and Steve’s was frowned upon. (Loki had done researched and asked Jess the history of homosexual relationships in order to better understand some of Steve’s hangups.) 

Loki wove his fingers with Steve’s and placed their hands between them. To an outsider, it simply looked as if the two men were sitting abnormally close. Loki leaned in further and began to whisper to Steve about mundane observations he was making, many which caused Steve to smile. 

“So, did you get your date?”

“Yes, I got my date.”

“Did it take the entire flight to Chicago?”

“No. It was settled before we left Anchorage.”

“Really?”

“Yes. I’m shocked you do not know. He called Stark.”

“He called TONY? Why on Earth did he call Tony?”

“To inquire if there was a restaurant he’d gone to in the forties was still around,” Loki replied quietly, scrolling through the listings of apartments in his price range located within a few blocks of Steve’s. 

None of them met his liking, if he were honest. 

“I could have done that. I got internet. There’s even 4G here in Anchorage!”

“I know. I’m not sure why he called Stark.” 

“Because they are secretly friends,” Jess whispered. 

Loki snorted. “While Stark would adore to have everyone living in the tower with him, those two are not friends.”

“Oh, come on. They get along just fine,” Jess insisted. “They get on better than they did in the movie, remember? They didn’t have any of those stupid fights about how Tony’s a jerk in a suit and if you take away his Iron Man suit he’s just Sherlock Holmes.”

“Jessica, that wasn’t in the movie.”

“Oh, yeah. That was a Pintrest thing,” Jess laughed. “So, when’s this date?”

“Tonight,” Loki said. “What do you think Steven would do if I never found my own residence?”

“The Mexican Hat dance Homer style.”

Loki closed his eyes and shook his head. “I have no idea what that means.” 

Steve was a nervous wreck. 

He felt like a kid with sweaty palms and a turbulent stomach doing an intimation of a stormy sea. He’d not felt this nervous since the night before he underwent the serum injection— and this was ten times worst for some unknown reason. 

Steve was not about to subject himself to a scientific experiment. There was no unknown here. It was not a life or death situation. It was just dinner. 

 How did people do this? 

And they did. Every single day. People went on dates, whether they went with someone of the same gender or a different gender. 

Was Steve even going with someone of his gender? Loki was a Frost Giant and could change forms, evidently. 

Steve shivered. 

Loki as a woman. Did that appeal to him? 

“No,” Steve harshly said to himself, grabbing his dinner jacket off the back of the chair where he’d slung it. “No. Don’t even…”

Now, along with being a ball of nerves, he was angry at himself. Steve had always been opened minded. He’d always looked passed what a person looked like and saw their worth, their potential. It was what had wound up elevating him from a ninety pound weakling into what he was: Captain America. 

Steve shrugged into the jacket and straightened his tie for the millionth time. 

“Are you ready?”

Steve startled, forgetting that Loki was still within the apartment. Turning, Steve found Loki draped in the doorway to the bedroom wearing black trousers, matching vest, and a white button down shirt. Somehow, he’d managed to make wearing a tie look cool and not stuffy. Steve fiddled with his, as he hated having things around his neck like ties and bow-ties.

“Cease fidgeting,” Loki chided, crossing the room in a few short steps. He reached up and brushed Steve’s hands aside, fixing the tie. Steve’s eyes glued onto Loki’s pale neck, more so on display from the fact he’d brushed his hair back than the fact his collar was open. 

How was he wearing a tie with his collar open?  

“Do you have a jacket?” Steve asked, thankful his voice came out sounding normal. “It’s kind of cold.”

“I have a coat,” Loki assured, eyes dancing as he watched Steve. Steve dumbly stared into those beach glass eyes and forgot what why he was nervous in the first place. “Now, shall we go?”

Oh, yeah. Dinner. Date. Loki. 

Steve nodded, unable to voice words. Loki smiled, taking a few steps backwards before turning and striding off.

Steve was maddeningly adorable when he was nervous. 

He was also tongue tied when he was overwrought, so he hadn’t been the best conversationalist on their way to the restaurant. Once they were seated and Loki began to chat about mundane things (mostly so he himself wouldn’t second guess himself for suggesting the date in the first place), Steve snapped out of his neurotic state and reverted into the man that had captured Loki’s attention in the first place. 

“I never did understand that,” Steve said, latching onto Loki’s bafflement at what constituted for art on Midgard. “And I’m an artist. Or at least, I like to think I could be.”

“Steven, you are,” Loki assured. “Just because you fail to understand contemporary art, doesn’t mean you’re not an artist.”

If there was one thing— besides freedom and what was right—  Steve was passionate about it was art. 

“How is a white block in a white room art?” Steve asked, looking baffled. “The Modern Art movement was amazing. How did we go from that— taking art to new levels and creating new methods of painting to having a canvas painted in one solid color and selling it for thousands?”

Loki chuckled. “That I cannot answer. I’m still new to this whole art world on Mid— Earth.”

Loki had been trying to call the planet its proper name, especially as he was now living here. Its inhabitants did not go around referring to their planet as Midgard. 

“It’s just one of the many things that changed while I was on ice,” Steve muttered, stabbing his steak a little viciously. 

“What about the man who threw paint all over the place?” Loki inquired. 

Steve sighed deeply and went off on a tangent on Jackson Pollock— the artist who threw paint all over the place and called it a day.

“That was rather nice,” Loki said as they walked down the street after their meal. “We ought to do it again.”

Steve nodded. “Yeah. Uh, thanks.”

“For what? You insisted on paying for our meal,” Loki said, looking honestly confused.

“For putting up with me.”

Loki narrowed his eyes. “I do not put up with you, Steven. I enjoy being around you, no matter how odd you behave.”

Steve cleared his throat, watching a few people pass them on the street. One took a double look at him before moving on. Steve ducked his head and accidentally rammed into Loki. 

“Sorry. I mean…I know…I’m…well, uh…”

Loki sighed, giving Steve a smile. 

“Dear Steven, while I might occasionally get frustrated with you, I do not plan to allow your small issues to derail us,” Loki assured. “I hope one day you’ll see no one cares.”

“I know. I know. I know this is a different world. I know the way people think has changed,” Steve admitted. “It’s just…”

“Hard to rewrite your mind,” Loki said. “The offer is still on the table.”

“No,” Steve said, feeling anger well up within him. “No. I like you the way you are.”

“Alabaster instead of blue?

Steve sputtered. 

Loki smirked, slinging his arm over Steve’s shoulder and pulling him closer. “I know that wasn’t what you meant.”

Steve continued to sputter incoherently. 

“You rather I remain male, then, yes?”

Steve nodded, stopping and pulling Loki so he was standing in front of him. “You said yourself you think of yourself as male. It’s who you are.”

“I can be anyone.”

“I just want you.”

Loki’s eyes suddenly went bright and he stared at Steve as if it was the first time he was seeing him. 

“I just want you,” Steve repeated and then on the street, in full view of anyone passing, he kissed Loki.