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There's something off about Zhang; that is something that the entirety of the Guard Team can agree on, once Gitarin brings it to their attention. It's hard to tell exactly what is off about him when he comes in one day, in a worse mood than usual, but it's there, and it's obvious in the way he loses focus, spacing out only to snap if someone points out that he's doing that.
“The fact that he's in denial only proves it,” is how Gitarin sums it up. “Now, if only we could figure out what's going on with him…”
Not once does anyone consider the fact that Zhang wouldn't deny a problem if he wanted everyone to know about it, and that trying to invade his privacy and figure out said problem is probably not what he wants. In fact, his team rarely considers what he wants, so it's really no wonder he's so damn tired all the time.
~X~
It's only a few days later when Carlos gets a pretty telling clue. The two of them are walking together, on their way from a meeting, when a young woman bounds up to them, a determined look in her eyes.
“It's about time for our rematch, don't you think?” she asks.
“Not right now,” Zhang grunts. “I'm busy.”
“What? But, Mr. Zhang! I think I'm ready to take you on again.”
“Later.”
“Come on,” she cries, “kick my ass!”
“And who exactly are you?” asks Carlos with a grin. She’s cute and, ordinarily, he would be flirting with her by now, but she stares up at Zhang with such bright eyes that he has a pretty good feeling that he’ll have some competition, should he try to put the moves on her.
“This is Ume,” he says. “She's-”
“I'm his rival!”
“I wouldn't say that. A rival implies a serious competitor.”
“I almost had you a few times! Besides, you're the one who insisted on a rematch!”
“Pleasure to meet you, Ume,” Carlos cuts in, before Zhang can continue to bicker with her. “My name is Carlos.”
“Yeah, you and Mr. Zhang work together,” she replies. “I guess you're busy with work, huh? Well, I won't bother you now, but don't let him forget that he owes me an ass kicking!”
Once she's out of earshot, Carlos turns to Zhang with a wide grin. “So, what does that mean? Are you literally kicking her ass, or…?”
“It's literal,” he replies quickly. “And I really don't want to know what the fuck you were gonna say next.”
“I can't believe it! I can't believe this is why!”
“Why what?”
“Why you've been acting so weird,” says Carlos. “Everyone’s noticed, and no one believes you when you try to deny it, so we've all been keeping an eye out. I just never would have thought it was because you got a girlfriend!”
“I- what?!”
“Really, I'm more surprised you got a girlfriend in general,” he mutters. “It doesn’t seem real.”
“What the- Ume isn't- look!” Zhang looks pissed, and has to take a deep breath before he can actually respond. “She's obsessed with fighting me for God knows what reason. She kept begging me, ‘kick my ass! Kick my ass!’ So I gave her a fight, and now she wants a rematch. We aren't dating, we hardly know each other.”
“You sure about that? There wasn't a euphemism in there that I missed?”
“I swear, if you don't cut the bullshit…”
“Alright, alright, I get it!” He laughs, shaking his head. “Don't take it too seriously, alright? But, really, even if you aren't dating, you've got to admit there's something there.”
“Something like what? Annoyance? Cos, yeah, that was definitely a factor.”
Sighing, all Carlos can say is, “You're hopeless, you know that?”
~X~
“What? Zhang has a girlfriend?”
“He said they weren't dating, but that girl was into him.”
“So Zhang has a girlfriend!”
“Wow, I can't believe it!”
“What was she like?”
“Is she as big or as scary as he is?”
“Is she pretty?”
As they're talking amongst themselves, the man in question enters the room.
“Hey, congratulations on the girlfriend!”
“It's about time!”
“When do we get to meet her?”
Rather than answering, rather than even lashing out like he would normally do, Zhang just turns right around and walks away. He doesn't have time for their bullshit today.
~X~
“Okay, so Zhang doesn't have a girlfriend.”
“But there's definitely something between them.”
“It's going to have to happen eventually.”
“Maybe we should intervene! Try to set them up!”
“Um...I'm not sure about that. I don't think Mr. Zhang would...appreciate anyone getting involved in something private.”
“Yeah, he'd kick our asses for sure.”
“Isn't that what not-his-girlfriend is into?”
“I swear, there's got to be something kinky going on there!”
“I always kinda figured Zhang would be a closet masochist though. He seems like the type who wants to get tied up but could never admit it.”
“Oh, God, you didn't have to give me that image!”
“I wonder how far they've gotten.”
“They aren't dating, remember?”
“The fighting’s gotta turn into something more eventually.”
“Maybe he’ll finally stop bitching if he gets laid.”
“He really looks like he needs it.”
“Can we please stop talking about Zhang’s sex life? It's weirding me out, Boss.”
“It's not my fault he won't give us answers. I still stand by trying to get them together.”
“Nah, I think Jun had a point. Even you're not safe when he gets pissed off.”
“Actually, you're the least safe of us all!”
Conversations like that continue for a while, whenever Zhang himself is not present, as they watch his moods shift and his behavior continue to remain strange- though, eventually, that strange becomes the new normal for him. As they watch him and wonder how his relationship progresses, the vast majority of the Guard Team- as well as their boss- get very involved in trying to read him and guess what's happening.
~X~
Zhang wakes and finds himself curled up around something warm, and it takes him a moment to remember that this is Ume. The events of the day before catch up to him, and he remembers the moment he finally gave in to his feelings, and he remembers inviting her home with him. They were up rather late, but eventually, she fell asleep with him holding her, and he was not far behind her.
Now, he smiles to himself at this rare moment of tenderness in his hectic life. He's going to have to go to work soon, which means he’ll have to wake her up and she won't nearly be so peaceful then, but he doesn't mind that. After all, he's fallen for her, loud mouth and all, and compared to his workplace, she's almost a breath of fresh air.
~X~
When Zhang walks in, a casual smile on his face, with tired eyes that are somehow less harsh than usual, those who have been tracking his relationship know immediately what has happened. And some of the more enthusiastic followers have been waiting for this day so eagerly that they've been prepared for it.
The sound of party horns fills the room, while bits of confetti scatter from a few party poppers. It is, all things considered, not the most unusual sight to be seen at one of these meetings, but Zhang does not even have the chance to ask what the fuck is going on before a chorus of voices fill the room.
“Congratulations!”
“Good job!”
“You finally did it!”
A sense of dread overtakes him as he processes their words, and he clenches one fist at his side as he braces himself for the answer to his question. “What, exactly, did I do?”
Only Gitarin is shameless enough to answer what it is that they're all thinking, and so, only Gitarin is met with an ass kicking that even Ume would not be jealous of. While he's at it, he's too distracted and does not hear the hushed voices in the room.
“So, they definitely did it, then?”
“Couldn't you tell just by looking at his face? That is the face of a changed man.”
“I always knew he had it in him.”
However, other than Zhang’s change in mood, and other than the knowledge that he has a girl waiting for him at home, this is a rather ordinary day for him.