Archive of Our Own

“You can stay at my place if you wanna,” Mark said, the proposition coming after two beers and a long day as evidenced by the dark circles under his eyes. It sounded like nothing more than the delusional ramblings of a drunk, however when Donghyuck only cared to respond with a roll of the eyes, he was surprised to find that the older man was in fact being serious. “I mean it; I know your place is going through a lot right now, so I really don’t mind.”

Donghyuck wanted to laugh at the absurdity of the offer, but if he was honest he couldn’t deny that his apartment was far from tip-top shape; there had been a nasty water leak which required ripping out floorboards amongst other timely and rather annoying repairs. It was even encouraged for residents to stay elsewhere for the time being unless they were fine with the construction work waking them up at ungodly hours of the morning. Donghyuck was far from pleased if he had to be honest. 

And Mark’s place was nice - though that was expected from someone as well off as him. His best friend was successful at what he did, often flying around the globe all whilst getting paid enough to support his cushy lifestyle. Donghyuck was jealous even if he wasn’t scrapping by himself. If he could stay at Mark’s place for however long the older man would let him then Donghyuck was more than happy to take on the offer.

However, there was one problem.

“What about Renjun?” Donghyuck asked, taking a sip of his own beer and swallowing down the lump in his throat which formed whenever he mentioned the other man. 

His chest tightened, heart rushing with a vicious mixture of regret and ache - the pain which came from never being able to have what was right within your reach, barely able to brush your fingertips against the enticing cut of the diamond right in front of you. 

That was Renjun: the jewel Donghyuck could never possess, stolen away by Mark whilst Donghyuck had been too prideful and nervous to make a move.

Of course, he did try to get Renjun to fall in love with him, however his tactic entailed annoying Renjun to no end. At first, Donghyuck truly did think it was working, however he was proven wrong, his heart crushed to a pulp when his own best friend unknowingly swept Renjun away from him. 

It made sense though; Mark was sweet - a complete gentleman that listened to whatever Renjun said. He was the complete opposite of Donghyuck, opting to make Renjun’s life easier instead of riling him up until he turned bright red.

But Renjun looked so hot when he was angry. He looked so cute when he huffed and threatened Donghyuck, causing him to laugh like the sick pervert he was. 

Donghyuck wanted Renjun for as long as he knew him, but he wasn’t even close to second best. And Mark was a saint, spoiling his boyfriend like he deserved. He had the money and time for it. And what did Donghyuck have? Nothing. 

“What about Renjun?” Mark echoed, confused about the initial question.

“Doesn’t he live with you?” Donghyuck asked, the rim of the bottle pressed against his plump bottom lip in an attempt to hide as much of himself and his feelings from Mark. 

Not that Mark could ever tell anyway: he was far too oblivious for that. It was quite funny really, because Donghyuck’s pining for Renjun was easy to see if you looked for more than five seconds. Jaemin said it was pathetic, and honestly that probably hurt more than anything. 

“Oh. Yeah,” Mark confirmed. “Why? I thought you guys liked each other.”

Donghyuck scoffed. If only he knew.

Not that Renjun liked Donghyuck more than a friend. It was a lesson Donghyuck learned long enough already, not getting his hopes up. But he could deal with that. He could cope with being Renjun’s friend and nothing else, even if at times he still thought of the tantalising slope of his throat or his sharp fox eyes. 

He thought of his slender body, narrow shoulders and overall smaller build. Donghyuck wanted to play rough with him, flashes of their playful fights repeating behind his eyes, a sharp shiver running up his spine.

Donghyuck wanted to completely overpower him. To make Renjun his. 

He really was a terrible friend.

“We do,” Donghyuck confirmed as casually as he possibly could. “It’s just… You know? Kinda weird to stay over at your place and he’s just there.”

Confused, Mark looked at Donghyuck, slowly blinking as the drinks clearly messed with him. “I’m sure he won’t mind,” he continued. “If anything, I’m kinda asking for his sake; I know he doesn’t like being left alone, and I’m probably gonna be away for a few weeks so… I’m sure he’d appreciate the company.”

“And I’m the best choice?”

“Sure! You’re my best friend,” Mark pointed out. “Who better to keep Renjun company than you? Besides, you need a place to stay so this is a win-win situation. Come on! Say yes.”

And Donghyuck really didn’t need much more persuasion. If anything, he had to keep the sheer extent of his excitement at bay, fighting to reel his reactions in, only offering Mark a casual shrug and “sure, I guess that sounds good,” when all he really wanted to do was scream. 

As it stood, Donghyuck considered the proposal as a blessing and a curse; it was a chance to spend more time with Renjun, but it was also going to be pure torture being around the man and not being able to do anything about his own feelings for him. 

If anything, it would probably get awkward really quickly - even if Donghyuck knew how to keep his act up around Renjun. After all, he managed for this long and neither he nor Mark were none the wiser. Honestly, as long as Renjun acted like he always did, then Donghyuck would probably be fine. 

Just how hard could it be?

“Nice. I leave on Tuesday. Pack whatever you need.”

Donghyuck nodded. “Will do. Thanks.”

♡♡♡

It was incredibly hard. 

Donghyuck stood in front of the open front door, his suitcase by his side. Standing in front of him was not Mark like he expected, but his stunning boyfriend; Renjun looked like he had just woken up - which wasn’t unlikely considering the man liked to get as much sleep as he could, taking naps in the middle of hangouts if he could find a nice and comfortable spot to do so. His hair was tousled, his cheeks slightly puffy, absolutely adorable. Donghyuck wanted to bite them (and maybe kiss and lick them too, though he wasn’t about to allow his mind to go there).

What made things worse for Donghyuck, however, was his state of dress. Renjun wore an oversized t-shirt which Donghyuck was confident belonged to Mark if the size and cringey design were anything to go by. 

When Donghyuck’s eyes dared to drop down, he had to suck in a sharp breath, holding it in as he hastily looked back up so that he wouldn’t stare. It was hard to tell if Renjun was even wearing anything underneath, the shirt dropping down to just above his knees. He could be completely naked under there.

If Donghyuck was Renjun’s boyfriend instead of Mark, he wouldn’t be able to concentrate on anything around him if Renjun walked around the house like that. He felt weak in the knees already, wanting to drop down in front of the short man, pull the loose t-shirt aside and get a taste of him on his tongue. 

Because he was a freak. A pervert beyond salvation.

“Oh,” Renjun uttered, pulling the doors further open. “Hi.”

“Hi,” Donghyuck echoed with a noticeable strain in his voice. He cleared his throat, brushing it off as nothing worth commenting on. “Is Mark here?”

“Debatable,” Renjun replied, stepping aside. “Come in. You can leave your stuff in the hallway for now.”

“Thanks.” With a polite bow of the head, Donghyuck stepped inside with Renjun closing the door behind him. He kicked his shoes off and shimmied out of his coat, surprised when Renjun took it from him without asking, hanging it up on the coat rack. 

“He’s been running around making a ruckus since five in the morning,” Renjun explained, leading Donghyuck further into the apartment. 

Donghyuck was used to the layout by now, knowing where to find anything he could possibly want within the four walls. In a way, it didn’t feel like he was staying at a random hotel or anything, able to move through the space freely and comfortably. 

“Mark!” Renjun called out, his face scrunching as he did so. “Donghyuck’s here!”

Donghyuck heard a clatter from the bedroom, snorting at his best friend and his typical clumsiness.

“Already?” Mark asked, shuffling out of the bedroom and into the living room, pulling a suitcase behind him. He looked surprisingly well put together considering how hectic everything around him seemed. Was he really up since five in the morning? “Oh damn! Hey, Hyuck! Sorry, I lost track of time,” he explained, coming over to greet Donghyuck with a tight hug. It was bone crushing, causing Donghyuck to yelp in his arms. 

It was funny really considering the older man used to be so averse to showing Donghyuck - or anyone for that matter - affection like this. Of course, that all changed when he became comfortable with himself. Even more relaxed once he finally started dating Renjun. 

“You’re breaking my bones,” Donghyuck groaned, only making Mark squeeze him even harder, going as far as to lift Donghyuck off the ground. 

It was only when Renjun finally intervened that Donghyuck was freed. “Ease up, will you?” He placed a hand on Mark’s arm, smoothing it down as the muscles beneath his palm relaxed. “Did you find what you were looking for or are you still tearing the apartment upside down?” Renjun looked at his boyfriend, crossing his arms, resting his entire body weight on his left leg. 

Sheepish, Mark smiled and ran his hand through his hair. “I found it,” he admitted. “I was just cleaning up. Sorry.”

Renjun rolled his eyes to which Mark smiled brighter, leaning forward to kiss his boyfriend on the lips. It was a light peck, warm and sweet. It was cute, yet it made Donghyuck feel sick. 

He had to look away, still feeling an immense sense of guilt swirling around in his gut anytime he saw his best friend with Renjun; he should have been happy for him, but he honestly hated Mark for the fact he was the one that got to call Renjun his. It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t right. 

And Donghyuck was a terrible friend. 

“It’s fine, I’ll clean up,” Renjun assured, pulling back from Mark’s kiss. “You should head to the airport already or you’ll miss your flight.”

“Not as bad as missing you,” Mark replied, placing his hands on Renjun’s waist, pulling the shorter man towards himself. Their bodies were pressed together, Renjun’s hands resting against Mark’s chest and slowly slithering up to his shoulders. “I’ll miss you,” the older man continued, leaning forward until their noses were brushing. His eyes fell to Renjun’s lips - lips which Donghyuck himself had looked at more than could be considered appropriate, fantasising about how they would feel pressed against his own. 

“Try to sound like you actually mean it,” Renjun replied, voice hushed and teasing in a way he almost sounded mean. Donghyuck found that quite enticing about Renjun, thrilled by that harsh, cruel streak of his. It made him want to push Renjun to his limits, seeing at what point exactly he softened and became pliant. Just how much did it take to finally tame that brat?

Mark made a low whine in the back of his throat, inching forward until his lips were practically touching Renjun’s. “You know I mean it,” he stated. “I’ll call you when I land. And before you go to bed. Yeah? I promise.”

Renjun hummed, allowing himself to be kissed by Mark. He didn’t lean in, probably embarrassed by how touchy Mark was being in front of Donghyuck. He simply let Mark kiss him, bodies close. Renjun tensed up, applying firm pressure where his hands rested on Mark’s shoulder as if to stop him from taking things further. 

Donghyuck could only look at Renjun, imagining himself as the one kissing him instead.

Once he pulled away, Mark looked over at Donghyuck. His appearance pissed Donghyuck off to no end, feeling rage simmering in his chest when the overhead light reflected on the spit on Mark’s bottom lip. Renjun’s spit. The older man licked it off, smiling at his best friend, completely oblivious as to what was going on in his head. 

“The guest bedroom is ready so feel free to unpack as you like,” Mark explained, his hand still on Renjun’s waist. “Feel free to stay as long as you want, even after your place is fixed up. You know your place around anyway so treat this like your home. And please be nice to Renjun,” he added before glancing over at his boyfriend. “And you, please be nice to Donghyuck.”

Renjun scoffed. “I’m always nice.”

“Sure,” Mark uttered with a fond smile. Unable to resist himself, he kissed Renjun again. “I’ll go now. Take care, alright? And reach out if you need anything.” He grabbed his suitcase and made his way towards the exit, Renjun following after him. Donghyuck spared himself the misery of seeing his best friend and his crush kissing again, opting to drag his own bag over to the guest bedroom.

He flipped it over and kicked it further along the floor, his mood taking a sour turn after seeing just how lovey-dovey the couple was. But of course they were like that: they were in love. They had a right to act like a couple, because they were one. And Donghyuck had no right to act like a scorned lover, because he wasn’t one. All he had was a crush which never went anywhere, suffering with it for… a very long time now. 

With a sigh, he knelt down and unzipped the small suitcase. He pulled out his toiletries, taking them to the en suite bathroom because yes, even the guest bedroom had one. A truly fancy apartment. 

Slowly, he got through his belongings, putting them away in the wardrobe and drawers before finally taking everything out. He shoved the empty suitcase against the wall before he threw himself on the bed. 

From where he was, he could peek through the ajar door. 

Mark’s bedroom was on the other side of the apartment, offering privacy to whoever decided to stay visit for the time being. Donghyuck saw the doors to the bedroom; they were wide open, though he couldn’t see anything inside. Not that he needed to.

He rolled over, looking up at the ceiling instead. Maybe he shouldn’t have agreed to Mark’s offer in the first place. Maybe this was a terrible idea.

In the middle of his minute breakdown, a soft knock came from his door. Donghyuck snapped himself upright instantly, finding Renjun standing in the doorway, leaning against the frame. “Unpacked already?” He asked, stepping inside without Donghyuck’s permission. 

“Yeah. I didn’t bring much in the first place,” Donghyuck admitted.

Renjun hummed, looking around. He didn’t say anything for a minute, the air within the confined space becoming thinner and harder to breathe - at least that’s how it felt to Donghyuck considering Renjun didn’t react at all. In the end, however, he did finally speak up, glancing at Donghyuck, the younger man sitting straight as a board at the edge of his bed.

“Are you hungry?”

“I- Not really,” Donghyuck replied. “I ate before I got here.”

Renjun hummed again, not really one to say much in the first place. “Good. I don’t cook, so if you want something you’ll have to make it yourself or order something,” he explained. “There’s stuff in the fridge; Mark stocked up so you might as well use it so it doesn’t go to waste.”

“Will do. Anything else I should know?”

The older man shrugged. “I don’t think so,” he replied. “Just… Don’t annoy me.”

At that, Donghyuck grinned, mischievous and genuine. “But you’re so cute when you get mad at me,” he uttered, able to pretend that he was being nothing more than friendly and playful with Renjun. 

The only one who knew the truth behind Donghyuck’s actions other than himself was Jaemin. As far as anyone else was concerned, this was just the type of relationship Donghyuck and Renjun had: a constant back and forth, a game of cat and mouse with no real end in sight. 

Renjun rolled his eyes. “And you only ever look good when you shut up,” he retorted, earning himself a laugh from Donghyuck.

“Are you saying I’m handsome?”

“That is not what I said,” Renjun pointed out, a faint glimmer of something warm appearing momentarily behind his eyes. The corners of his mouth twitched upwards into a faint smile, forced down as the older man tried to pretend he wasn’t enjoying whatever was going on between himself and Donghyuck. 

And Donghyuck knew that it was a terrible thing, but he allowed himself to be delusional any time he noticed that Renjun was having fun with their little banter, wondering if perhaps he liked it just as much as Donghyuck did.

“You don’t have to lie, Renjunnie,” Donghyuck said, pushing himself up from the bed. “I know you find me handsome and irresistible.”

“Oh do I?” Renjun replied, the question mixed with an airy laughter. 

“You do,” Donghyuck assured. “And it’s fine: I know I’m a catch. There’s nothing to be shy about.”

Renjun laughed, poking Donghyuck’s chest, the distance between them having magically shrunk in the span of a few seconds. His index finger dug into Donghyuck’s sternum, keeping them apart no matter how hard Donghyuck tried to close the gap. He could never breach Renjun’s boundaries. Only Mark could. And once more, Donghyuck found himself cursing his best friend, wishing that he never gave Mark an opportunity to steal Renjun from right under his nose. 

“I think you knocked your head on your way here,” Renjun said, looking up at Donghyuck’s forehead. “Yup. Looks like you hit it really hard.”

“Are you concerned about me?”

“Unfortunately,” Renjun replied before he pushed Donghyuck away. It wasn’t hard, nor did Donghyuck stumble back, but it felt like so much more; it was a reminder that Renjun could only ever draw them further apart, never nearer. But Donghyuck couldn’t do anything about it other than laughing it over. They were nothing more than friends, after all. “Do you want something to drink? Coffee? Or tea? I’ve got a bunch of nice loose-leaf teas you should try.”

Donghyuck mustered up a kind smile, forcing down the ache in his heart. “Sure. You can choose whatever; I’m not picky.”

“Well that’s a lie,” Renjun mused. Still, he didn’t argue. He glanced at Donghyuck, holding his gaze on the younger man for a second too long before he left, making his way to the kitchen. Donghyuck didn’t follow after him, waiting for Renjun to call him instead, the tea already poured over. 

Donghyuck wasn’t sure if he could handle sharing a living space with the man for a month. Maybe he would leave as soon as his apartment was fine to return to. That was probably the wisest option, but Donghyuck wasn’t the smartest person when it came to dealing with love. He was far from rational, making stupid decisions which more often than not backfired on him, hurting him instead.

He didn’t even tell Jaemin about staying over at Mark’s place. Of course, if he just said that, Jaemin probably wouldn’t have freaked out or anything. However, once Donghyuck elaborated on one small detail - that being that Mark would be gone for a month and Donghyuck would hence be alone with Renjun for the entire time - Jaemin would most certainly yank Donghyuck by his shirt and shake him around, yelling in his face and trying to speak some sense into him. 

But even then, Donghyuck was certain he would still go through with all of this. 

Maybe he was a sadist?

That question lingered in his head as he took a seat on one end of the large L-sized couch, his drink resting on a coaster on the coffee table in front of him. The T.V was on though Donghyuck really didn’t care, instead daring to turn his attention to Renjun. He was laid out on the couch, head resting on a pillow, his knees bent up. 

From where Donghyuck was sitting, he could see Renjun’s ass - unfortunately clothed. The fabric of his oversized t-shirt pooled at his stomach. His eyes were on the flickering screen, flipping through the channels until he landed on something he actually wanted to watch.

“Is this fine?” Renjun asked, catching Donghyuck by surprise. 

“A- Yeah. Fine with me,” the younger man assured without even sparing the T.V a glance. All he could look at was Renjun. His smooth legs which led to the tempting curve of his ass. Donghyuck licked his lips, sucking and biting on the bottom one as he thought of all the things he would love to do with Renjun if ever given the chance. 

He was a pervert right down to the core.

For the rest of the day, the two did very little. Donghyuck took the week off so he didn’t have to worry over work for a few days. As for Renjun, the man was self-employed anyway; if he wanted to laze around the entire day then he could do so freely and without a single ounce of regret.

As such, the pair spent most of their time on the couch. Once they got hungry Renjun ordered out for them. Hours passed and the most Donghyuck did was get up to go to the bathroom or to clean up after eating or to make something to drink. Somehow, they managed to get through an entire day like that.

Mark still hadn’t called, though that was a given he was flying across the globe. It would probably still be some time before he let anyone know he reached his destination. 

“I’m gonna wash up,” Renjun said, hauling himself up from the couch. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight.”

Not wanting to sit alone, Donghyuck decided that he might as well also get ready for the night. He headed back over to his bedroom, stripped and walked into the bathroom, standing under the steady stream of hot water in the shower. 

For a while, he didn’t move. He didn’t reach out for the shampoo or body wash, simply bowing his head as the water washed over him. 

And like the sick pervert that he was, he thought of Renjun again; he thought of him on the couch - all the positions he took over the course of the day, his ass always on display for Donghyuck. What a perfect view that was. If he was any more delusional, Donghyuck would have thought that it was intentional - that Renjun was teasing him, fully aware that Donghyuck wanted to take a bite and to sink himself inside. 

He thought of Renjun now - probably also in the shower. Naked. His skin smooth and perfect - clear and unblemished like porcelain. Perfect. Meant to be tainted and bruised up, left with marks of animalistic desire all over.

Instinctively, his hand dropped to his crotch. 

But he stopped himself before he could stroke himself. He was better than that. Better than to jerk off to his best friend’s boyfriend whilst staying over at his place.

He groaned, going for the shampoo instead.

In the end, he willed his lust away.

Donghyuck got dried and changed, slipping under the covers, grabbing his phone to keep himself entertained before he finally decided he was too tired for anything else. He missed a few texts from the groupchat, but after reading through them there really wasn’t anything he needed to see anyway. 

After scrolling for half an hour, Donghyuck finally had enough. He turned the lights off and made himself comfortable, his back to the door. The apartment was completely silent, and minute by minute, Donghyuck felt himself drifting away. 

And he was nearly there when he heard faint movement from the other side of the apartment. The opening of doors and the soft pad of feet against the wooden floors, slowly approaching the guest bedroom Donghyuck was staying in. 

Unsure what to expect, Donghyuck’s heart rate picked up. His breathing became unsteady, no longer able to fall asleep like this, his senses aflame.

But maybe Renjun was just going to grab a drink in the night, taking a slight detour to check if Donghyuck settled in alright. That was feasible. It made sense! 

Yet Renjun didn’t go, and his footsteps only grew nearer until Donghyuck felt his presence in the room. The older man loomed over Donghyuck, standing at the edge of the bed. Surely he wasn't about to kill him, right?

Renjun hesitated for a second before he finally made his move.

The bed dipped under the added weight.

Donghyuck gasped.

“Sorry,” Renjun uttered. “Did I wake you?”

The younger man gulped, glad that he was facing away from Renjun. At least this way, the other man wouldn’t be able to notice just how flustered he was, because what on earth was even happening right now? Why was Renjun in his bedroom? And why was he getting in his bed?

“N-no. What’s up?”

Renjun didn’t stop, continuing to join Donghyuck in bed. He slipped under the covers, his body heat sending a shiver down Donghyuck’s spine. He was so close now. Far too close for Donghyuck to be sane about it.

“Nothing,” Renjun replied, scooting over to Donghyuck. “Just… I don’t like sleeping alone,” he admitted.

“Oh.”

“Yeah. Mark got me one of those large body pillows that are supposed to be good for cuddling,” he explained, still finding a way to bring himself closer to Donghyuck. It drove him insane. Donghyuck could barely breathe now, focusing on everything but how close Renjun was to him - their bodies a mere head’s breadth away. “But it’s not the same,” he continued. “So I… Do you mind if we cuddle?”

Donghyuck could laugh. He could cry. He was close to both, actually, though he thankfully managed to reel himself in before he could embarrass himself. “I- Cuddle?” He asked, praying that the shake and thickness of his voice wouldn’t give away just how crazy he was about his current proximity to Renjun. 

“Yeah.”

Donghyuck squeezed his eyes shut. Maybe he was just dreaming. Maybe he was having a mental breakdown. But that didn’t matter, because Renjun was asking him to cuddle. And even if this was a dream, Donghyuck wasn’t about to say no.

Even if he knew that realistically he should refuse before things got any worse for him. Jaemin would have told him to say no. But Jaemin wasn’t here and Donghyuck was tired and lured in by the warmth of Renjun’s body. Donghyuck was far too weak to turn down the offer.

“Ah… I’m fine with that,” Donghyuck replied as casually as he possibly could. “But what about Mark?”

“What about him?”

He really could scream.

“Is he fine with this?”

Renjun shuffled, pulling the covers up higher. “Yeah,” he replied. “It’s just cuddling.”

“It’s just cuddling,” Donghyuck echoed under his breath. “Does he know, though?”

“That we cuddle? Yeah, he does,” Renjun replied confidently. As if it was a stupid question to ask in the first place. And it probably was. “I don’t like sleeping alone; he knows that.”

Donghyuck knew Renjun liked to be held and that he often pressed himself against Mark when he was tired or just felt like it. Renjun was comfortable with his other friends too, letting them hold him, cuddle him. 

It was only ever different with Donghyuck, but that had more to do with the fact Donghyuck was too scared to hold him, terrified that he would take it too far or that he wouldn't be able to let go in the end. 

So this made sense. It was fine. And if Renjun said Mark knew, then what was the harm? If Renjun struggled to sleep, then Donghyuck was happy to help him out. It wasn’t the end of the world anyway.

“Okay. Yeah, that’s fine,” Donghyuck assured. 

However, as soon as Renjun curled up against his back, throwing an arm over Donghyuck's waist, Donghyuck wasn’t sure if he regretted it or not. 

What he did know, however, was that he couldn’t fall asleep for a long time after that.

♡♡♡

The world didn’t fall apart and Donghyuck didn’t die. Granted, he was tired, sleeping in for longer than he usually would. 

When he did finally wake up, Renjun was already gone. The bed on his side was cold and for a moment, Donghyuck wondered if he imagined the whole thing and if the events of last night were nothing more than a vivid dream. However, as he looked to where Renjun would have been last night, there was a clear sign of another person’s presence.

So he didn’t make it up.

Donghyuck didn’t know if that was worse.

Now that he was awake and his mind wasn’t fogged up with exhaustion, Donghyuck could only groan. He dragged his hands over his face, his stomach churning. 

This was terrible.

Renjun just missed Mark. Renjun missed his boyfriend. That’s why he came to Donghyuck. Nothing else. After all, he said so himself; he liked to cuddle with Mark. But Mark wasn’t here, and so, Donghyuck had to do. But he would never replace his boyfriend. They were nothing more than friends, and if Mark was fine with the idea of Renjun snuggling up with Donghyuck during the night then he must have been confident that nothing would happen. 

Even if Donghyuck was perverse and a terrible friend, Renjun was a good boyfriend; he would never hurt Mark like that, no matter how much Donghyuck wanted him. What Donghyuck wanted didn’t matter to Renjun when he had Mark. The wonderful and perfect Mark who treated Renjun with the love and care that he deserved. 

Donghyuck could never be as good. He could never be sweeter and gentler than Mark. All he could do was corrupt and devour; he wanted to rile Renjun up until they both had no other choice than to rip the clothes off each other’s bodies, stumbling around the apartment in a heated craze. Donghyuck wanted Renjun all for himself, swallowing down his cries and moans. He wanted to rough him up, flip him over, dominating Renjun completely.

Because he was completely sick in the head when it came to Renjun. 

That wasn’t Renjun though. Though Donghyuck wasn’t privy to Mark’s sex life, he knew his best friend enough to know he wasn’t like… that. And so, he knew Renjun wouldn’t like all the things Donghyuck wanted to do with him. He was certain of it, and that only made him feel like even more of a dirty freak.

Donghyuck glanced over at the other side of the bed, running his hand over the empty spot. He felt a sharp tug in his heart - an ache which he was used to by now. 

Renjun should have been his. 

But he wasn’t. And he never would be.

Donghyuck could never be Mark.

The closest he could be was pretending to be him - offering his warmth to Renjun when he crawled into his bed, missing his boyfriend. Missing Mark. Never Donghyuck.

That morning was rough for Donghyuck, his expression downcast as he tried to ignore the sick swirl in the pit of his stomach. He didn’t want to think about it at all - about Mark and Renjun. All it ever did was make him feel miserable. 

“Are you okay?” Renjun asked when he saw Donghyuck out in the kitchen. 

The older man had gotten dressed in something other than an oversized t-shirt and boxers, actually resembling his usual self, dressed up for even the most menial event. Donghyuck found that extremely cute and endearing, always wondering what Renjun would come out wearing the next time he saw him; Renjun could make a routine trip to the groceries into a fashion show and Donghyuck was beyond endeared by it. Not that that mattered anyway.

Right now, he was in a pair of straight beige pants and a navy sweater - cashmere, most likely. He looked beautiful, but that wasn’t anything new. He always looked gorgeous. 

“Yeah. Guess I didn’t sleep that well,” Donghyuck said, explaining the miserable look all over his face. “New bed and all that.”

Renjun hummed. 

“Nothing a coffee can’t fix. You want one?”

“If you’re offering,” Renjun replied, moving into the open kitchen. He sat down on a stool, watching as Donghyuck navigated the kitchen with intimate ease. “Are you not going to work today?”

“I’m off until Monday.”

“Ah. Any plans then?”

“Not really,” Donghyuck admitted. “Probably just gonna relax. Jaemin says I need it. He’s probably right. What about you? Any plans for the month? You’re not just gonna stay cooped up in the apartment, are you?”

“I have some work to do,” Renjun replied. “But I can do it from home anyway, so… No real reason to go anywhere.”

Donghyuck grabbed two mugs, picking out his favourite one for himself. “Couldn’t you do it abroad too?” He asked, wondering why on earth Renjun didn’t join Mark in the first place. “That way you could've been with Mark.”

At that, Renjun sighed. Donghyuck looked over at the other man, lithe fingers running through black hair. He grew it out, his nape covered up. Donghyuck liked it that way. But then again, he liked anything Renjun did. 

“No?”

Renjun shrugged, tapping his nails over the smooth counter top. “We tried last time,” he explained. “And it just… didn’t work.”

“Oh? What, were you too distracted to work?” Donghyuck asked, trying to make a joke of it as if he didn’t feel bile rising up his throat. 

Renjun scoffed. “As if. It was the opposite,” he replied. “Mark gets so consumed with work that it’s like he’s not even there. And he knows it, so once he finally realises, he’s all sorry about it and makes promises that he will take me out for dinner or something like that,” he continued, pouting and resting his chin in the palm of his hand. Tired. Used to it. Bored. Maybe even hurt. “He does try, but work always wins in the end. I’ve stopped trying to pretend that will ever change,” he admitted. “So it’s better to stay back home. At least that way I don’t get disappointed.”

And that wasn’t what Donghyuck expected to hear. He didn’t think that Mark would not make enough time for Renjun, but then again, it did sound feasible; after all, Mark was a workaholic down to the bone. If he set his heart and mind on something, then he would make it happen, no matter what he had to do and give up to reach his goal. Donghyuck just didn’t think that would mean he’d jeopardise his relationship with Renjun.

Donghyuck would never do that. He would always have time for him. 

He looked down at his mugs, hands out on the counter, gripping onto nothing. His chest was tight, his smile thin and forced. “Do you want me to beat him up for you?” He asked in jest, yet he meant it. 

“Don’t bother; you won’t be able to knock any sense into him,” Renjun stated with a wave of his hand. “That’s just how he is. I’m used to it.”

The “you shouldn’t be” was left unsaid. 

“Did he land safely?” Donghyuck asked.

“Yeah. He gave a call earlier,” Renjun confirmed. “He sounds rough so we didn’t talk for long.”

“Still hasn’t gotten used to jet lag, huh?”

“That’s his problem to deal with.”

Donghyuck laughed, nodding in agreement. He finished up with the coffee, not even having to ask Renjun how he liked it since he already knew. 

He knew how Renjun liked his coffee, how he liked his tea; he knew what Renjun’s go to snack was and what his typical order at their favourite restaurants was. Donghyuck knew far more about Renjun than he did about his other friends - maybe even more than he knew about Mark. All because he couldn’t stop paying attention to him. All because he was hopelessly and pathetically whipped for him. 

He handed the mug over to Renjun, offering him a smile. “Breakfast?”

“Since you’re offering.”

Like this, Donghyuck could almost pretend this was normal for them - that this was how his life was. But it was nothing more than an illusion which would burst a month from now, and when it did, Donghyuck would be worse off than he currently was.

Not that he cared.

♡♡♡

It wasn’t a one time thing.

Once Donghyuck was in bed, getting ready to call it a night, Renjun found himself in his doorway once more. The two made eye contact, the air knocked right out of Donghyuck’s lungs in the process. 

Last night, he hadn’t actually gotten to see Renjun properly when he slipped under the covers with him, and now, he wished that was still the case. Because there Renjun was in a pair of tight boxers and a loose tank top, not as large as the t-shirt from the day before. It didn’t cover up as much of his front, and Donghyuck feared he was about to start salivating when he saw Renjun’s silky smooth thighs. 

“You wanna cuddle again?” Donghyuck asked.

“If you don’t mind,” Renjun said, already making his way over to the bed. He pulled the covers back, taking his spot next to Donghyuck in bed. “My bed feels too big,” he explained, making himself comfortable. 

Donghyuck hummed, turning the light on the bedside table off. He didn’t dare turn over to face Renjun, opting to keep his back to the older man for the time being. Who knew what would happen if he allowed himself to look at Renjun, face to face? Probably nothing good. 

Renjun settled in, curling against Donghyuck’s back just as he did previously.

He just missed Mark. That’s why he was here. He said so himself as well, assuring Donghyuck multiple times that there was nothing weird or wrong about their nightly cuddles. It was just his own way of coping with his boyfriend being away. 

“Did Mark call?”

“Just texted,” Renjun replied. “Said he caught a cold or something. Of course he did.”

“He’s fragile, isn’t he?” Donghyuck joked. “Leave him alone for a minute and he becomes a disaster.”

Renjun hummed in agreement. 

That should have been that. 

But it wasn’t.

“And he’s… still fine with this?”

“Yeah,” Renjun replied. “It’s just cuddling.”

“Just cuddling,” Donghyuck echoed under his breath. That’s all it would ever be.

♡♡♡

It continued throughout the week. 

Donghyuck didn’t bother asking Renjun any more if Mark was fine with it. And when Mark decided to give him a call, Donghyuck didn’t mention it either.

“How is it?” Mark asked, his voice hoarse as he recovered from an air-con induced cold. “Staying over. Is Renjun being nice? I know you two always bicker.”

They did bicker, but it was playful. Even more playful now. In the mornings, Donghyuck would tease Renjun about his appearance - puffy cheeks, hair a mess - and Renjun would bite back, cute as he tried to argue with sleep still in his eyes. 

They would bicker over what to order for dinner with Donghyuck always choosing the opposite of what Renjun picked. It was constant and familiar and Donghyuck wouldn’t trade it for anything else in the world.

Especially when their bickering turned into something physical. They would push and shove, fighting over the remote or something just as stupid. 

Donghyuck was larger than Renjun, stronger by the virtue of having a slightly bigger frame. Hence, he would overpower him and have Renjun pinned beneath him on the couch, smirking like a mischievous fool, his breathing heavier from the playful fighting. Renjun could never free himself from his hold even if he tried to kick Donghyuck away, whining and complaining that it wasn’t fair. 

Sitting in between his spread legs, Donghyuck could imagine himself taking Renjun just like this. And when the older man arched his back and raised his hips, the images behind his eyes became too vivid to ignore. He pulled away instantly, laughing it off and teasing Renjun for being weaker than him, earning himself a punch to the arm or a pillow tossed over his head.

“It’s fine,” Donghyuck replied. “Nobody died yet so I think that’s a good sign.”

“Yeah. Probably,” Mark mused. “And umm… How is he? He says he’s fine but I feel like he’s annoyed at me.”

Donghyuck raised his eyebrows. This was news to him. “Ugh… I don’t think he’s annoyed? He’s doing fine. He’s still calling me an idiot and fighting with me so I think he’s in a good mood.”

Finding a sense of comfort in his words, Mark exhaled. “That’s good. I know he can get a bit… you know? Especially when I’m away and busy. But I’m sure you can keep him company.”

“Yeah. Yeah, I can.”

Mark hummed. 

They didn’t really say much over the call. And Donghyuck really wanted to ask - to let him know - about his and Renjun’s cuddle sessions. But he didn’t. Of course he would know. Why wouldn’t he? And he would be fine with it too, trusting his boyfriend and his best friend to stay together for a month without anything bad happening. There was nothing to feel weird about regarding that whole arrangement. It was normal. Completely normal.

Just as normal as it was when the pair would sit side by side on the couch, their shoulders pressed together. It was normal when Renjun opted to have his midafternoon nap in Donghyuck’s lap, trapping him in place for two hours. And it was normal when Renjun joined Donghyuck in bed at the end of the day, finding his place snuggled up against Donghyuck’s back.

Though, Donghyuck wondered, was Renjun even comfortable like that?

“I didn’t think you’d be the big spoon,” Donghyuck said after the lights were off for the night.

“Sometimes,” Renjun replied. “Though I prefer being the one that’s being hugged,” he admitted. 

“Oh. I- I didn’t know. Do you-” Donghyuck stopped himself. This was a terrible idea. A horrendous idea. But he was just being a considerate friend. Sue him! “Do you want me to cuddle you instead?”

Perhaps it was a blessing, or perhaps it was a curse, but Renjun seemed to actually agree. At first, Donghyuck thought he hallucinated it - imagining the faint nod and barely audible “yeah” from behind him. But when Renjun pulled his arm away and waited for Donghyuck to make the next move, Donghyuck realised that this was in fact real. He pulled himself together before flipping over, now face to face with Renjun. 

Their eyes locked, faces shrouded in darkness, yet still there was an ever present light in Renjun’s eyes. It was a light which beckoned Donghyuck closer, daring to risk everything that he knew and loved just for him. He would do anything for Renjun, chasing after that light at the end of the tunnel, never getting closer but never getting further. 

It only lasted a moment though. Renjun turned around, his back to Donghyuck in a silent offering. 

Donghyuck would be a fool to refuse him. 

Technically, this wasn’t anything new; Donghyuck was clingy with his friends, either the one doing the hugging or being on the receiving end, however it was different when it came to Renjun. 

Everything was different when it came to Renjun. With him, Donghyuck had to be more careful lest his true intentions and feelings surface up to the top, impossible to push back down in time. When they hugged, it was obviously playful because Donghyuck knew better than to dare and cross the line with him, perhaps too scared of what would happen if he allowed himself to indulge in Renjun’s warmth for even a second too long. 

That would be dangerous.

Instead, they bickered and fought. Donghyuck accepted the scraps of Renjun’s affection, relishing in the moments he could just feel the older man in his arms as he held him tight, Renjun whining and grumbling and trying to claw his way out of Donghyuck’s arms. That was the most he could grant himself; anything more and Donghyuck was sure he would do something stupid. 

Donghyuck looked at Renjun’s back, the curve of his slender body enchanting. His eyes dipped even lower, biting down on his bottom lip at the sight of Renjun’s ass. He might as well be dreaming.

But he didn’t want to wait any longer. Not wasting any more time, Donghyuck slung his arm over Renjun’s middle. There was a noticeable distance between them still, far too wide for Donghyuck to be satisfied with it. And before Donghyuck could do anything, Renjun found his hand over his stomach and yanked on it, urging Donghyuck closer until they were pressed back to chest. 

Renjun could probably hear the pounding of Donghyuck’s hand like that. 

So he laughed it off. “Look at you getting clingy,” Donghyuck said. “Did you get replaced by a much nicer Renjun when I wasn’t looking?”

“I’m always nice,” Renjun argued.

Donghyuck clicked his tongue. “Ah… I don’t think that’s true.”

Renjun kicked him under the covers. 

“There’s the Renjun I know and love,” Donghyuck said jokingly, yet he also meant it completely. This was the man he loved. And that killed him day in, day out. “You never let me hug you like this. You always hiss and scratch.”

“Because you insist on being annoying about it,” Renjun pointed out. “With all your stupid manhandling and arguing and trying to win and be better than me.”

“That’s because you’re just so cute when you get mad at me,” Donghyuck said. He paused, his expression falling. Renjun wouldn’t see anyway. “Do you hate that?” He asked, the moment between them becoming noticeably more fragile. 

After a moment of genuine consideration, Renjun shook his head. “No,” he admitted, the single word soft. It was a relief, and Donghyuck felt a pressure vanish from his chest at that moment. “I like it. That’s our thing.”

Donghyuck hummed. “Yeah. Like Tom and Jerry.”

“Like that,” Renjun agreed. “Besides… You’re not getting on my nerves twenty-four-seven.”

Donghyuck chuckled. “You sound like that’s a bad thing,” he teased. “I know you get sad when I don’t bother you every day.” If he could see him, Donghyuck was certain Renjun was rolling his eyes at him right now. “Don’t worry though, Renjunnie, I’ll make sure to be the bane of your existence until you die.”

The older man scoffed, lightly slapping Donghyuck’s hand where it was over his front. “That’s unless I strangle you to death first.”

“With what arm strength?"

At that, Renjun looked over his shoulder, frowning. He tried to punch Donghyuck but all Donghyuck could do was laugh at the onslaught, not at all hurt by Renjun’s light fists. In the end, Renjun rolled back over, making himself comfortable and somehow even smaller. 

“Just shut up and sleep,” Renjun said, the pout thick in his voice. 

“Alright, alright. Goodnight, Renjunnie.”

“Goodnight.”

“No cute pet name for me?”

Renjun kicked him under the covers again.

Donghyuck laughed, squeezing Renjun tighter in his arms. He’d take what he could get. 

♡♡♡

Donghyuck finally had to go to work, his week-long holiday coming to an unfortunate end. 

When he dragged himself up in the morning, Renjun stirred awake. It was a strange sight, one which Donghyuck could get used to. But once again, Renjun wasn’t his to have no matter how badly he wanted the other man. The lucky bastard who got to wake up to this sight was Mark and not Donghyuck. Though, for the next month, Donghyuck got some of his privileges. 

He looked at Renjun, taking in how ephemeral the older man looked in the morning - hair a mess, cheeks puffy, sleep still keeping a tight hold over him, refusing to let him go out of his grasp. Renjun was beautiful. Mark was one lucky bastard.

“Wha- why are you up?” Renjun asked, words slurred as he wiped the sleep out of his eyes. He reached his hand out for Donghyuck, keeping him still. 

It killed Donghyuck on the inside, thinking how Renjun would react when Mark got up in the morning instead. Perhaps Renjun was thinking of Mark right now, not fully processing that it was Donghyuck in his place. 

“I have work,” Donghyuck replied, watching as Renjun huffed and deflated back on the bed. 

“How long?”

“As long as most jobs,” Donghyuck replied. “Until I retire.”

The older man clicked his tongue. “Not what I meant.”

Donghyuck grinned. “I know. I’ll be back around six. Trust me, I don’t want to be out longer than I have to.”

That response must have meant more to Renjun than Donghyuck could understand right now because the older man decided to pull himself up, looking at Donghyuck, his eyes barely open yet somehow conveying an emotion that Donghyuck struggled to completely decode, settling on hopeful.

“Six?” Renjun asked.

“If nothing else holds me back, yeah,” Donghyuck replied. “Maybe seven at the latest, but I doubt it'll be that late. Why? You want me to grab something on the way back?”

Renjun considered, tilting his head to the side. “And you really won’t be staying behind?”

Donghyuck raised his eyebrows. “It’s a daycare, Renjun; once the kids are gone, and I finish cleaning up, I am gone.”

“Oh. Okay.”

Still confused, Donghyuck just looked at Renjun. “Want me to get food on the way back? Or are you fine if we order in?”

“I don’t mind,” Renjun replied. 

“Cool. Anyway, I’m gonna get ready. You can stay here if you want. My home is your home - literally in this case.”

Renjun chuckled, laying back down on the bed.

Donghyuck proceeded with getting washed up and changing into something more presentable. He opted to get dressed up in the bathroom, not sure if he could muster the courage to get naked with Renjun in the same room as him. Renjun didn’t want to see that anyway, so Donghyuck didn’t even entertain the idea for longer than a second.

Once done, he was surprised to find that Renjun wasn’t in bed. Instead, the older man was already in the kitchen making coffee. 

When Donghyuck joined him, Renjun looked at him, offering a mug with freshly brewed coffee to kickstart Donghyuck’s morning. As for breakfast, Donghyuck could handle that himself; there was a 7-11 near the daycare that he usually stopped by. 

Arguably he had the time and capabilities to make himself a proper breakfast and even lunch to take to work, but Donghyuck also couldn’t be bothered half the time. 

“I forgot you even worked,” Renjun pointed out.

“Unfortunately, not everyone can live in the lap of luxury like you do,” Donghyuck retorted. “Some of us have to return to the daily grind. It’s not that bad though,” he continued. “I have Jaemin to keep me company most of the time.”

“The two of you…”

“Yes?”

Renjun chuckled, shaking his head. “You’re a terrible combination. And to think you’re trusted with keeping other people’s kids alive is shocking.”

Donghyuck shrugged. He couldn’t argue with Renjun considering he and Jaemin really were an odd pair, but they worked. They teased each other and bickered, but it wasn’t the same as it was with Renjun. 

“We’re two halves of one idiot,” he explained. “With us together we just about make one functional adult. That’s enough.”

“If you say so,” Renjun mused, taking a sip of his coffee. 

“Anyway, what will you be up to all alone, princess?”

Renjun scoffed. “I’ll entertain myself just fine, don’t worry about me.”

“God forbid I’m curious. At least Mark tells me what he does - yaps my ear off about it,” Donghyuck explained. “Complains about how hard he’s working and all that bullshit. What do you even get up to?”

“Are you asking what I do for work?”

“I mean… I get the general idea of it,” Donghyuck replied. “Own business, a fancy blog - all the fun stuff. But like, other than that? What do you do? Like when Mark’s not around?” That was something Donghyuck was definitely curious about. “Do you just work as well? Or do you laze around like the past week?”

“Both,” Renjun said. “And Mark is out a lot, so I just… do whatever,” he explained. “Go out, shop, get food, meet up with others.”

“Without me?”

“Without you,” Renjun confirmed. “I don’t know what else you’d wanna know anyway.”

Another shrug from Donghyuck. “Dunno. Just curious. You’re a mystery to me, Renjunnie,” he added, leaning forward into Renjun’s personal space. The older man rolled his eyes, pushing Donghyuck away. “What are the plans for today then?”

“Work. And then wait for you to get back.”

“Oh Renjunnie… I will come back for you. I’ll be here as soon as possible.”

“I’ve heard that before,” Renjun muttered around the rim of his coffee mug.

“Hmm?”

“Nothing.”

They wrapped up their morning soon after that with Donghyuck rushing out, making his way to work. 

A week had passed but nothing really changed, and so, Donghyuck got back into the groove of things. He liked his job too. Jaemin said it was because Donghyuck was a kid himself which earned him a kick and punch here and there, but perhaps there was some merit to his words. 

During the designated nap time for the kids, Donghyuck and Jaemin stepped out for a break of their own. 

Jaemin got out his lunch - a neatly packed box with segregated food groups like the health freak that he was. Donghyuck couldn’t even tease him for it because it looked really fucking good and if Donghyuck played his cards right, Jaemin might give him a bite of his homemade gimbap. It was far more appetising than the cup ramen Donghyuck grabbed from the convenience store on his way in. 

“Where the hell have you been anyway?” Jaemin asked, unhinging his jaw to take a massive bite of his food. 

“Huh?”

Jaemin didn’t answer, too busy chewing. 

“I took a week off. What, do you need me to tell you my location at every point of the day? Should I get a tracker implanted just for you?”

“Freak,” Jaemin uttered after swallowing down his words. “I meant you weren’t at your place.”

“My place? What? Why did you even go there?”

“Because I wanted to see you?”

“Unnanounced?”

“You come to my place unannounced,” Jaemin argued. Donghyuck did in fact do that, though he often came to regret it when he came at an inconvenient time for Jaemin, cockblocking him with his presence. “It’s only fair. But you weren’t there. They were doing work too. Is everything fine?”

“Yeah,” Donghyuck assured, checking on the state of his noodles. “There was a leak so I moved out for the time being. I’m staying over at Mark’s place.”

“Ah. That’s nice then,” Jaemin mused. “Mark’s generosity, not the leak. Wait… Isn’t Mark away?”

“He sure is.”

“So he just gave his whole place to you? Damn, that must be nice.”

Donghyuck pulled a thin smile, poking his chopsticks into the cup. “Yeah… Though he didn’t leave it to me,” he stated, feeling awkward as he spoke because he knew exactly what Jaemin would say. 

Jaemin knew. He was the only one that knew. 

It took him a few seconds to understand, and when it finally clicked, Jaemin’s jaw dropped. “No…”

“Yep.”

“You’re staying with Renjun?”

“Yeah. Just us two for a month.”

“A month?”

Donghyuck kept his eyes down, avoiding making any eye contact with Jaemin. He was fascinated with the state of his cup noodles. Did they use a new recipe for them? They seemed to be cooking faster than usual. 

“Of course he’s there,” Jaemin uttered. “He lives there, because he’s Mark’s boyfriend.”

“He sure is.”

Jaemin exhaled, placing his chopsticks down. “Donghyuck…”

He didn't appreciate that tone. Donghyuck laughed - nervous and offended. “What? I’m just staying over because my place is falling apart and Mark being the saint that he is offered me a room at his place? Besides, Renjun needs the company so-”

“Needs the company? He said that?”

Donghyuck sucked his lips in, shoulders slouching. “Mark did,” he admitted. “Apparently he doesn’t deal well with being alone for too long. He said he was doing it for Renjun’s sake. Make sure he’s not sad and all that. You know, he sounded kinda worried the last time he called - about Renjun and how he’s holding up. So it’s not like I’m doing anything bad. It’s just a favour for my best friend.”

“Right. Because your intentions are pure.”

“I-”

“You rambled,” Jaemin pointed out. “Clearly,” he continued, picking his chopsticks back up just so that he could wave them around Donghyuck’s face “you know the problem here.”

“There's no problem.”

Jaemin offered Donghyuck an unconvinced hum, picking up one of the neatly cut gimbap rolls and placing it down on the napkins in front of his friend. “Yet you're flustered. Funny, isn't it?”

“I'm not flustered. And I didn't ramble.”

“Sure.” Jaemin carefully guided his food to his mouth, chewing slowly as his eyes remained fixed on Donghyuck. It was unnerving and infuriating. And it achieved exactly what Jaemin intended for it.

“It's not like I'm gonna jump him,” Donghyuck argued, keeping his voice down as much as he could in his rattled state. “What do you think of me?”

“I didn't say you'd do anything.”

“But you think being alone with Renjun for a month is somehow the worst thing on earth.”

“Didn't say that either. You're the only one saying anything.”

Donghyuck huffed, folding his arms over his chest. Jaemin truly had a knack at pissing him off. At least Donghyuck found some peace in the knowledge he could do the same to him - although Jaemin was getting harder to rile up these days, all his old tricks not working as well as before. 

“How long has it been now anyway?” Jaemin asked. “That crush of yours. Seven years?”

Donghyuck clenched his jaw, grinding his teeth as he uttered a low “eight years.”

“Ah… Time sure does fly,” Jaemin mused. “And how long have Renjun and Mark been together? It's gonna be seven years, isn't it?”

“What are you trying to say?”

His friend exhaled, shoulders deflating. “I’m saying that I want better for you,” he stated. Touching, really. “Which means getting over the guy you've been pining after for years. He's with Mark, and last time I checked they seemed very happy together.”

Maybe. Or maybe not.

A nervous fray in Mark’s voice, the brief comments made by Renjun, and the fact Renjun wasn't with Mark for his month away. But then again, Renjun was clingy, curling up to Donghyuck because he missed Mark at the end of the day. It would always be Mark for him. 

“You're only hurting yourself like this,” Jaemin continued. “Maybe it's time to move on.”

Donghyuck scoffed. “You think I haven't thought about that? It's not easy. He's so- You just don't get it. I've never met anyone like him. I don't think I ever will.”

Jaemin listened, believing Donghyuck completely. After all, he had seen first hand the way Donghyuck looked and acted around Renjun. It wasn’t hard to tell he was utterly whipped. And it was pathetic. Even Donghyuck knew as much.

“I get it. I really do,” Jaemin said. “But he's with Mark. Your best friend. Do you realise that this is-”

“Messed up? Yeah. Yeah, I know. I really do.”

Jaemin looked down, lips pursed. He didn't say anything else, simply adding another gimbap onto Donghyuck’s napkin.

“You can stay over at my place if you want,” Jaemin suggested after a brief moment of silence. “I'm sure Jeno will understand.”

“And risk hearing you two go at it? I'll pass,” Donghyuck replied, shuddering at the thought. “Besides, it'll be kinda weird if I leave like that. Plus… Renjun wants company.”

Jaemin eyed his friend up and down. In the end, he could only sigh and nod. “Sure. Just don't do anything stupid.”

“I won't.”

♡♡♡

Donghyuck got back half past six.

Renjun was waiting for him. 

When he did finally walk in, Renjun eyed him curiously, as if Donghyuck stepping through those doors was something worthy of further consideration. It was strange, his gaze following Donghyuck as he kicked off his shoes and dragged himself into the living room.

“Missed me?” Donghyuck asked, throwing himself on the couch. 

Renjun didn't give him a verbal response, however his attitude was enough for Donghyuck to understand.

He missed him.

“Cute.”

The rest of the day was spent laying around, ordering in, watching T.V and chattering together. Donghyuck didn't have that much to say, and in fact he was drained for the day, hence he left most of the talking to Renjun who talked his ear off about something Donghyuck didn't really care about but something which he listened to anyway. All in all, it was a pleasant way to end the day.

And once more, they ended up sharing the bed. By now it was something Donghyuck completely expected, looking at Renjun to see if he was also ready to go to bed.

Yet he didn't dare say anything - not even as a joke. He didn't dare to teasingly call Renjun honey, or say they should go to bed. That would have been taking things too far. 

For the next week, they continued just like that. And each time Donghyuck got back to the apartment, he would notice a shift in Renjun’s behaviour. 

The older man seemed… brighter? He played along with Donghyuck’s teasing comfortably, his laughter echoing throughout the apartment, Donghyuck’s heart clenching, stomach filled with butterflies set loose. 

And Renjun was touchier too; he would stick to Donghyuck’s side, propping his chin up on the younger man's shoulder as they stood around in the kitchen. He would cuddle up to Donghyuck on the couch too, their hands somehow joining, fingers locked. 

It was borderline. 

Renjun also carried himself around the apartment completely differently, his smiles and the look in his eyes mischievous. His oversized tops would slip off his shoulder, revealing smooth and unmarred skin, begging to be ravished and marked up. 

If Donghyuck didn't know any better, he would have thought Renjun was being flirty.

But that was insane.

“How's Mark?” Donghyuck asked on a Friday evening, Renjun stepping back into the living room after a brief phone call.

“Fine,” Renjun replied, his mood soured. He sat right next to Donghyuck, his bare thigh flush against Donghyuck. “He was too busy to talk,” he explained.

“Oh.”

And that was something Donghyuck came to learn was a frequent occurrence. Mark, ever the perfectionist and workaholic, struggled to make the time for Renjun. Especially when it mattered the most. Sure, he was away due to work, but it was a month. A month of separation and he couldn't find a way to spare Renjun more than fifteen minutes of his time. 

No wonder Renjun seemed down.

“It's fine,” Renjun mumbled, making himself comfortable against Donghyuck. 

Just how honest was he being?

♡♡♡

Donghyuck had a drink. As did Renjun.

Arguably, it wasn’t a terrible idea; Donghyuck knew how to hold his liquor, and whilst Renjun had a lower tolerance, he could have a few drinks before he completely lost his wits, words slurring. 

They spent the evening on the couch, watching a show Chenle suggested earlier but that Donghyuck honestly didn’t care all that much about since he wasn’t all that into cooking survival shows or whatever it was. It was decent background noise to their chatter.

There was something to the air around Renjun as his cheeks filled with colour, giddy and bubbly laughter spilling past his lips. Donghyuck was utterly enamoured, having to constantly pry his eyes off the older man’s mouth lest it got too obvious. 

Renjun’s body was hot, the temperature around them rising with each slow sip. He kept shifting closer too, bodies making contact at different points - the press of their knees, fingertips which seemed to draw closer over the course of the night. 

Donghyuck wasn’t sure what was happening. But he didn’t complain. 

But Renjun did - albeit about something completely different. 

“He hasn’t called,” Renjun stated, head tilted to the side. His expression was forlorn, yet his words came out like a longstanding fact. It was something he was used to, yet it still killed him on the inside no matter how hard he tried to hide it. “He rarely does when he’s working. It’s like nothing else exists. Even when he’s here,” he elaborated, wrapping his lips around the mouth of the bottle. 

“Mark?”

Renjun scoffed. “Who else?”

Donghyuck always thought that their relationship was picture perfect. Because it looked picture perfect; Mark, utterly smitten with Renjun, kissing him and touching him whenever he could, drawing out laughter from the smaller man that only he was capable of eliciting. And Renjun, looking at Mark with matching love. Even when they weren’t lovey-dovey, their affection was apparent to everyone around them. 

But perhaps that was only how things were out in the public eye; once they were behind closed doors, then maybe the illusion shattered.

It was clearly still love, but without all the filters in place. 

“There’s a reason I don’t want to go with him on his trips,” Renjun declared, causing Donghyuck’s interest to spike. 

“Because he’s too busy?”

Renjun laughed, raising his eyes as if to say Donghyuck barely knew the half of it. “That’s one way to put it,” he replied. “The first time I went with him, I thought it would be fine. But he gets… consumed by work. I was sitting alone in our hotel room, just waiting for him. Sure, I did go out, but that’s not the point.”

Donghyuck hummed, his hold around his own drink tightening. 

“He’d make plans for us - dinners and trips and all that. But work always, and I mean always, got in the way. Sometimes, he’d even forget to text me to cancel plans. So there I would be, like an idiot, sitting in our hotel room, dressed up and ready to go. By the time he came back it would be the middle of the night,” Renjun explained, the bitterness in his voice seeping out. “He’d apologise later, make excuses and even more promises and I- I would forgive him time and time again, because I knew he meant it. He always means it. And I do love him, but it gets tiring,” he added, glancing down at his drink, contemplating the contents of his bottle. “You know?”

“Yeah. I get it,” Donghyuck replied, desperately wishing he could say all the things that were buried within him all this time. 

I’d never treat you like that. I’d always keep my promises. I could love you better than he could. 

Yet he still kept quiet. It was the best choice. Even if it felt like the worst. 

“He means well,” Donghyuck said, feeling like he should probably stand up for his best friend a little, even if he really didn’t want to in the slightest. “He loves you.” That much was obvious. Donghyuck had heard it first hand - all of Mark’s smitten ramblings, all the plans he had for their life together. He loved Renjun more than words could ever say.

“I know,” Renjun assured. He paused, looking off somewhere to the side, letting out an airy, pained laugh. “But what does that say about me?”

Confused, Donghyuck tilted his head to the side. Renjun didn’t elaborate, pretending he didn’t say anything. And just like that, Donghyuck was left to wonder what Renjun meant exactly. 

What did it say about him that he was in love with Mark? That he allowed Mark to get his hopes high just to crush him? That time and time again, Renjun let him do it? Or was it something else? Donghyuck wouldn’t know. How could he?

“He’ll call,” Donghyuck said in spite of himself.

“I know. Probably when he wants something,” Renjun acknowledged, the curve of his lips a complicated thing. 

Donghyuck couldn’t pry his eyes away, thinking of Renjun on the phone with Mark, touching himself to the thought of a man an ocean apart when he could have Donghyuck instead. 

As the thought swam around in Donghyuck’s mind, Renjun’s phone vibrated and rang. 

“Speak of the devil and he shall appear,” Renjun muttered, reaching over for his phone. He looked at the contact, taking longer than necessary before he answered. “Hi,” he said, his eyes briefly making contact with Donghyuck’s own. “Yeah. Just having a drink. You?” 

Donghyuck chewed on the inside of his cheek, feeling a nasty swirl of jealousy swirling around in his gut, only made worse by all the alcohol. He took another drink, swallowing thickly as Renjun’s body shifted, his voice sweet and heady.

“Sure, just give me a minute.” With that, Renjun excused himself, leaving his half empty bottle on the coffee table. “Miss me?” He offered Donghyuck a brief nod before he made his way over to the bedroom, saying “yeah, I miss you too,” before shutting the door after himself. 

Donghyuck waited a minute before he turned the T.V off, keeping as still as he could be, regulating his breathing until the only thing audible in the apartment was the quiet thrum of the electrical appliances. 

And he waited with baited breath, second by second, deluding himself into believing he just wanted the peace and quiet and nothing else. He wasn’t waiting for anything. Nothing at all. 

But then he did hear something.

Faint and muffled, but enough for Donghyuck. An unmistakable whine - a sweet moan which Donghyuck wanted to kiss from Renjun’s lips, keeping it locked up within his own heart. 

He leaned forward, head in his hands as he listened. 

Eyes squeezed tightly shut, jaw clenched, Donghyuck’s heart pounded. He knew what he was: a perverted freak who deserved to burn in hell for what he was doing to Renjun and Mark. He knew that this wasn’t normal and that two and a half beers didn’t justify being this fucked up. He knew it all perfectly, but he still listened, picturing Renjun as he was now, touching himself in bed with only a thin wall separating him from Donghyuck. 

It killed Donghyuck not being able to be in the room with him. It killed him with every passing second, the silence met with the occasional soft whimper and gasp. 

And he knew he couldn’t listen anymore.

Not giving himself the chance for things to get even worse, Donghyuck hauled himself up from the couch and rushed to his bedroom. 

He hopped in the shower, opting to douse himself in cold water to calm his nerves before he went to bed, forcing himself to sleep and not think of Renjun in the other room. Renjun, with his hand under his waistband. Renjun, chest rising and falling as he touched himself. Shameless and wanting. Donghyuck couldn’t think about any of that.

But no matter how hard he tried, nothing worked. All he could see when he closed his eyes was Renjun - body bare and flushed a pretty pink. He wanted to kiss him all over, touching him as he went down. He wanted to feel every part of him. The desire consumed him fully. 

Yet he refused to give in. 

In the end, an hour probably passed before Donghyuck was able to actually start falling asleep. And of course, Renjun had to make it worse once more; he stepped into the bedroom, soft feet padding across the floor as he made his way over to the bed, slipping under the covers with Donghyuck, taking hold of the man’s hand so that he could drape it over his waist. He was quiet, most likely thinking that Donghyuck had fallen asleep already.

Donghyuck could smell it - faint yet obvious nevertheless. The flush of skin, the arousal which tainted him completely. 

Renjun didn’t scrub it off himself before he joined Donghyuck. Was he showing it off, or was he oblivious? Did he know just how painful it was for Donghyuck to hold back and was this all just a sick game of his? That didn’t seem likely, but god did Donghyuck wish for it to be true, even if just so he knew Renjun wanted to tease him. Tease him relentlessly. Tease him until he cries and begs.

Donghyuck would beg. Beg just for one taste. Just for once chance.

He moved closer, pressing his lips to Renjun’s nape. The older man shivered against him, urging Donghyuck to hold him tighter. And so Donghyuck obliged, slotting his body against Renjun as if it belonged there in the first place. 

Chest to back, his crotch dangerously close to the supple curve of Renjun’s ass. He inhaled Renjun’s natural scent, a lump forming in his throat. It was impossible to resist and Donghyuck couldn’t pull away no matter how hard he tried. 

He thought that he would be able to fall asleep like that with Renjun’s warmth carrying him away. So he tried, closing his eyes, trying to think about anything other than Renjun and their close proximity. But the more he tried, the worse it got.

Donghyuck’s mind filled with perverse images, the faint gasps he heard earlier playing on loop, the volume cranked up to the max. He saw Renjun in bed, his pale legs spread apart for him, slender fingers submerging within his perfectly pink walls.

Donghyuck yearned for it, gagging with sheer want, desperate to know how it would feel to be buried deep inside.

He wanted it so badly that he couldn’t contain his desires. 

Donghyuck stirred, feeling an unbearable ache at his crotch. He knew very well what it meant and on any other occasion he would have dealt with it, however, as he slowly came to his senses, Donghyuck realised that that simply wouldn’t be possible - not when Renjun was in bed with him. 

They were still in the same position, however they managed to get even closer.

Now, Donghyuck was completely hard against Renjun’s ass, feeling the crease as clear as day.

Donghyuck gasped, his hips rolling instinctively despite his best efforts and attempts at being rational. Though he couldn’t think straight no matter how hard he tried to; the concept of right and wrong was tossed out the window, leaving Donghyuck to pant, breathing erratic as his hips continued to roll behind Renjun.

He was a pervert. This was taking things too far. 

Donghyuck couldn’t stop. 

He wanted to punch himself - knock some sense into him - yet he couldn’t. It had been two weeks now of being constantly by Renjun’s side and Donghyuck truly was on the verge of snapping and falling apart completely. 

He had to put up with seeing Renjun day in and day out, comfortable and casual. He saw him, skin a pleasant pink after stepping out of the shower. He saw him during and after his naps, flustered and adorable. And he saw him when Renjun probably didn’t even notice Donghyuck was watching, stretching like a cat, skin exposed as he did so. 

Donghyuck saw far more than he was allowed too, and he indulged in more than he ever should. Far too many cuddles and evenings spent together, and now here he was, thinking that that meant something - that it allowed him to take something he had no right in taking. 

Mark deserved to kill him. As did Renjun. 

Donghyuck groaned, burying his face in Renjun’s shoulder, fighting the sway of his hips with all his might. He just needed a minute. Just a minute and he would have the self-restraint required to pull away completely and rush into the bathroom. 

All he needed was a minute.

Renjun hadn’t fallen asleep yet. 

Donghyuck only realised it when he heard the older man suck in a shaky inhale.

He was done for.

“I- I’m sorry,” Donghyuck uttered. “I just-”

“It happens,” Renjun said before Donghyuck could say anything stupid. He couldn’t see him now, but Donghyuck was certain that the older man was embarrassed - perhaps even more than Donghyuck which seemed impossible given the situation. “It’s fine.”

“Sorry. Don’t know why I- I’ll just-”

“It’s fine,” Renjun uttered, airy and nervous. With that, Donghyuck tried to make the move to pull away only to be abruptly stopped by the next words uttered by Renjun. Words which Donghyuck thought he was hallucinating at first. “You can…” Renjun paused, swallowing down the nerves lodged in his throat. “I- if you want, I’m fine with it.”

If he dared to move, Donghyuck thought he would fall apart completely. He was too scared to breathe, holding it in, still convinced that he somehow managed to make up in his head the words Renjun was saying. But even then, it wasn’t as if Renjun actually said anything. He just said he was fine with Donghyuck getting a boner and that it happens. Because it happens!

Still, that didn’t explain what exactly-

“You can slip inside, if you want,” Renjun elaborated, the words barely audible. “Earlier, I- So it’s fine.”

Maybe Donghyuck was actually dreaming. Or maybe he died. Either option seemed plausible at this point. And still, Donghyuck couldn’t dare move, fearing he was somehow imagining all of this. 

However, that quickly changed when Renjun moved his ass back, grinding against Donghyuck’s clothed erection, eliciting a low, raspy groan from Donghyuck. 

That was all Donghyuck needed for his last thread of restraint to snap. 

Donghyuck gripped onto Renjun’s waist, slipping his hand under the man’s loose t-shirt so that he could feel his skin, every layer of clothing in between them causing Donghyuck immense grief. He was harsh with it, drawing out a whimper from Renjun, ass grinding back down on Donghyuck’s dick with animalistic need. 

It was maddening - the way Renjun felt so perfect against him. Donghyuck lost all senses when he was with Renjun, consumed by years of desire, all packed into this one single moment together - a moment which would undoubtedly come to an end far too soon. Though that didn’t stop him, his mind hazy, unable to stop himself now that he had a chance.

Donghyuck met Renjun’s ass with a rhythm of his own, chasing after the sinful drag against himself. 

He was painfully hard already, yet he didn’t want to let this slip away from him before he had the chance to truly enjoy it. The hand with which he gripped onto Renjun’s waist dropped over his stomach, stroking the soft skin before moving up to his chest, pressing his palm over the middle of his ribcage, feeling the distinct pounding of Renjun’s own heart. 

Renjun bit down his whines, reaching for Donghyuck’s hand over his chest to guide it back down, silently begging Donghyuck to touch him where it really mattered. And it made Donghyuck delirious, his mouth leaving wet and hot kisses over Renjun’s nape and shoulder, rocking into the older man as his hand dipped under Renjun’s pyjama bottoms.

The touch so close to his cock drew out a delectable whine from Renjun - one which Donghyuck savoured, locking it within his memory. And Donghyuck wanted to hear more, just as much as he wanted to feel more, pleasing Renjun until all he could do was cry and babble in bliss. 

A man on a mission, he wasn’t going to make Renjun wait longer for what he craved, wrapping his hand around Renjun’s cock, warm and hardening with each messy sway of their hips. 

At the contact, Renjun shuddered, biting down a moan. It pained Donghyuck, greedy to hear it without any restraints in place. He'll make it happen before the end of the night. 

Donghyuck stroked him in tempo with the rocking of his hips, dragging his hands down from the leaking tip down to the base, the movement made smoother by the lecherous lust leaking from Renjun’s slit. He smeared it all over, flicking his wrist the way he liked it, delighted by the muffled and wanton whines and gasps it drew out of the older man. 

As Donghyuck was too busy with jerking Renjun off, the older man reached behind himself, lifting his hips up just enough so that he was able to push his bottoms down, exposing his ass for Donghyuck to take to his liking. Still, Donghyuck’s hand was relentless, finding far too much pleasure in hearing Renjun crack under his touch; he revelled in the whines and gasps, the way Renjun’s body trembled, the way his skin flushed, his scent intoxicating. 

Donghyuck nosed along Renjun’s nape, licking a stripe over the skin in the process, tasting the thin sheen of sweat on his tongue. He couldn’t get enough of it, mouthing over the exquisite expanse of flesh offered up to him, wanting to engrave all of it to memory. Just one taste. Just one more taste. 

He was in a trance, so much so that he didn’t notice when Renjun reached back and in between their bodies, palming Donghyuck’s cock through his shorts. 

Donghyuck groaned, sinking his teeth into Renjun’s giving flesh hard enough to leave a mark on his shoulder. Renjun didn’t mind, working Donghyuck up more and more before he slipped his hot hand down under the waist band, searching for Donghyuck’s own weeping erection, giving it a few sharp tugs before he guided it over to his ass.

Donghyuck shuddered, feeling himself closer than he ever thought possible. 

“Inside. Please,” Renjun begged, his voice strained. 

“Like this?” Donghyuck asked, pushing his hips forward on instinct. “What about the-”

“It’s fine,” Renjun interrupted. “I’m ready,” he assured, cupping his cheek and pulling it apart for Donghyuck to sink himself inside. And as tempting as that was, Donghyuck needed something more than residual lube and his own precum to slip in. With that, he took his hand off Renjun’s throbbing cock, using his own spit to coat the length of his own dick. 

Renjun whined at the loss of attention, but Donghyuck wouldn’t leave him hanging for long. 

With his hand at the base of his cock, Donghyuck guided himself to Renjun's eager entrance. He groaned the second he rubbed over the pucker, the heat of Renjun’s body intoxicating. In the end, he was unable to hold on for longer than a second before he pushed himself inside, mouth open wide in bliss as he felt himself submerge within Renjun’s opening. 

He was so tight and perfect. Just for him. 

Donghyuck felt delirious after just the tip, his heart hammering in his chest. It felt too good - far better than anything he could have ever imagined. Renjun was so hot and so soft, his walls plush around him as they swallowed him up. 

He worked himself open earlier on the phone call to Mark, two - maybe three - fingers deep as he thought of Mark fucking him. But Mark wasn’t here now, and Donghyuck was certain that his best friend didn’t know about this. Even if he was okay with the cuddling in bed, there was no way on earth he would be fine with Donghyuck fucking Renjun in his place.

But right now, Donghyuck couldn’t care any less. He couldn’t care in the slightest about Mark because Donghyuck was the one fucking Renjun right now, sinking deeper and deeper, getting to hear Renjun’s delightful moans the fuller he became. 

Donghyuck submerged himself completely, his breathing uneven. It didn’t feel real, but no dream could ever be this vivid. Nothing could ever feel this good. 

“Fuck,” he exhaled, pushing Renjun’s waist to reposition the older man so that it would be better for the two of them. Renjun didn’t resist it, twisting himself forward, his ass clenching around Donghyuck’s cock. “Oh god,” Donghyuck groaned, leaving heated, open mouthed kisses along Renjun’s shoulder and neck. “You feel so good. So good.” 

Delirious. He really was delirious. 

“So good for me,” Donghyuck continued, his hand once more finding Renjun’s dick, stroking it as he began to gently rock his hips back and forth. He gave Renjun a moment to adjust to his presence, soaking up all the airy noises he pushed out of his lungs with the slightest movement of his hips. “So good.”

Renjun crooned, shoulders shaking from Donghyuck’s attention. 

And Donghyuck couldn’t resist any longer.

He pulled his hips away, a low groan echoing through the bedroom at the sinful drag of Renjun’s snug walls over his pulsing cock. Just before he could slip out, Donghyuck slammed right back in, punching out the most beautiful noise he had ever heard in his life from Renjun: a moan meant just for him. 

Motivated to hear more, Donghyuck continued the relentless onslaught of his hips, fucking in and out of Renjun’s alluring heat at a frenzied pace all whilst his hand jerked the older man off. Renjun trembled and moaned, his face buried in his pillow as his hand reached behind, fingers tangled in Donghyuck’s hair, pulling and tugging with all the strength he could muster up amidst the attack. 

Donghyuck sucked and bit over his shoulder and neck, licking the beading sweat off his skin like a crazed animal. He had to have every part of Renjun or else he would go completely insane. One taste wasn’t enough. Just one time wouldn’t satiate him. 

Renjun felt like heaven. Everything just felt right when he was with him, their bodies joined as one. It was how things were meant to be, and now that he knew exactly what it was like, Donghyuck didn’t know if he could ever accept being apart from Renjun. His touch was magnetic - a power which pulled Donghyuck right back to Renjun without mercy - and trying to resist it was foolish. 

Mark should have never left, because Donghyuck was never going to give Renjun back to him. 

His hips fucked into Renjun vigouresly, moaning at the the way the walls gave way to him. He felt himself getting closer and closer to his orgasm, needing very little to finally tip over the edge. Judging from the uncontrollable shaking and constant litany of pleas and whines, it was obvious that Renjun was nearly there too, needing it just as badly as Donghyuck.

There was nothing quite as satisfying as this. 

Donghyuck pushed himself up, shifting the angle of his thrusts. Renjun cried out, shoulders bunching with the force of his impending release. 

“You close, baby?”

Renjun whimpered. That was a yes.

“Me too.”

The older man rocked back into Donghyuck’s fervent thrusts, meeting him halfway, moaning keenly the deeper Donghyuck went. 

He was close, trembling with need and overwhelming desire, needing just one more push before he finally came around Donghyuck’s cock, his walls twitching as he spilled over into Donghyuck’s hand - over his chest and onto the clean sheets. He came with a loud cry, wet and broken, hoarse and debauched.

Donghyuck did that.

With the added pressure around his aching cock, Donghyuck was soon to follow, only realising too late that he hadn’t pulled out, spilling inside of Renjun’s lush walls. And he didn’t care, continuing to fuck into Renjun’s delicious heat as he came, sinking his teeth into the man’s shoulder to leave yet another proof of his presence upon Renjun’s skin. He fucked his seed right back into Renjun, so deep he would feel him for days to come, taking his claim on Renjun. 

With a few more sharp snaps of his hips, Donghyuck was spent. 

For a minute, all the two men could do was try and pull themselves together, laboured breaths filling the bedroom. 

Donghyuck felt like he was swimming up on cloud nine, floating up and up, higher than anyone could ever go. And it was all because of Renjun. 

Next to him, Renjun was still trembling with the afterwaves of his orgasm. It was cute. Overwhelmed by his adoration for the other man, Donghyuck proceeded to kiss over his exposed shoulder and neck, easing Renjun back into reality. 

He wiped his soiled hand over the bedsheets before he stroked it over Renjun’s chest and waist, feeling him up like he couldn’t get enough - because he couldn’t. 

“Was that good for you?” Donghyuck asked, practically purring as he continued to pepper Renjun’s neck with kisses. 

“Wh-what do you think?” Renjun retorted, sounding utterly spent yet just as elated as Donghyuck felt. 

“Good,” Donghyuck hummed, still insatiable as he stroked Renjun’s chest all over, going up to one of his nipples, twirling it between his fingers. Renjun hissed, back arching. “You like that, baby?” He continued to tease the pert nipples, getting aroused once more by all of Renjun’s airy gasps. “Does he touch you like this too? Fucks you like this?”

At that, Renjun moaned, hips jerking. 

“I bet he doesn’t,” Donghyuck mused. “But that’s why I’m here, right? To fuck you like he can’t.”

“Donghyuck,” Renjun crooned, straining his neck as he finally looked over his shoulder, his eyes dark and blown out. Lips, begging to be kissed. A line of drool at the corner of his mouth from how good Donghyuck fucked into his tight ass. “You can- again.”

“Again?” Donghyuck asked with a wild grin. “Want me to fuck you again?”

“Y-yeah.”

“Aren’t you gonna say please?”

Renjun whimpered, biting down hard on his bottom lip. He wanted it just as badly.

“Please.”

Donghyuck wasn’t going to deny them both the pleasure. 

With ease, Donghyuck flipped Renjun over onto his stomach. Renjun gasped in shock, however once he had the chance to realise what happened, all he could do was laugh. It was a light and sweet noise which reverberated within Donghyuck’s heart, filling him with a crushing ache - a need - to ensure he gave Renjun everything he wanted. Anything he asked for. The world even. 

Donghyuck dragged the t-shirt Renjun was wearing up his back to give him more access to the enticing expanse of his skin. He leaned down, dragging his mouth over the curve of Renjun’s spine as one hand gripped the man’s waist, the other pulling down his bottoms. 

Renjun was dripping from his puffy pink rim, Donghyuck’s hot seed trickling down his crease, and he was about to be filled up once more. 

It didn’t take much for Donghyuck to be up and ready again, giving his cock a few strokes before he lined himself with Renjun’s entrance. He didn’t want to wait any longer, pushing inside with ease as if Renjun was made for him to use and savour. 

Head hung low, Donghyuck grinned as Renjun took him fully. 

“Fuck, baby, you feel so good around me.”

Renjun crooned, arching his back in satisfaction. Donghyuck trailed his hand over the vulgar slope, feeling the bumps of Renjun’s spine beneath his palm. He reached between Renjun’s shoulder blades, pushing down as he started to thrust into him. 

In and out. In and out, time after time, harder and faster with each passing second. And Renjun took it so well, moaning and gasping, thighs trembling, his sweet walls welcoming Donghyuck as if it were his own home. 

Donghyuck fucked Renjun into the mattress, messy and fast. He leaned his body over the man beneath to attach his mouth to Renjun’s neck, sloppily kissing him, losing his inhibitions and any common sense, biting and sucking hard enough to bruise. And Renjun let him, repeatedly crying out “yes” and “harder” to spur Donghyuck on. 

“Bet he doesn’t fuck you like this, baby,” Donghyuck said, lost in the bliss of Renjun’s scorching heat. “He’s too gentle, isn’t he? Too good for this. But I’m not,” he continued, feeling the way Renjun’s ass clenched around him from his filthy words. “You like that though, don’t you? Like being fucked like my good little whore, right? You get so tight for me, baby. So fucking tight.”

“Donghyuck,” Renjun cried out, fucking himself on Donghyuck’s plundering cock. “Please!”

“Like that?”

“Yes! God, yes!”

Donghyuck smirked against Renjun’s neck. “Since you love it so much.” With that, he pulled up, hands tight on Renjun’s waist. He slammed into Renjun’s opening, skin reddening between them as he continued to go harder and faster upon Renjun’s request, words slurred and dripping with lust. 

He was pliant beneath Donghyuck, giving himself over completely.

Drawing nearer to his climax, Donghyuck picked up the pace again, giving Renjun’s ass a light slap to spur him on. 

The older man moaned, snapping his hips from the contact. “Again,” he begged. “Please.” And Donghyuck happily obliged, spanking Renjun’s lovely ass time and time again, wondering if he would leave an imprint of his hand over the white flesh. 

Renjun was close, fucked hard into the mattress, babbling and crying from Donghyuck’s unforgiving onslaught. And still, he begged for more, tougher than he looked on the outside. He cried for Donghyuck to still go faster and harder, his entire body shaking with passion. More. He still wanted so much more and Donghyuck was determined to give him everything he desired. 

Donghyuck was unforgiving with his sharp thrusts, pushing Renjun further down, his cock rubbing over the sweet spot buried deep inside of Renjun. He abused it relentlessly, feeling as Renjun went rigid and tight in his hold until he went limp, reaching his peak with an earth-shattering cry. 

He couldn’t stop shaking as he came, spurts of white painting the sheets and smearing over his chest. And still, Donghyuck fucked into him harder and harder, making Renjun cry more and more, overstimulated and twitching before Donghyuck joined him in his sense of ecstasy, spilling into him, pumping the heady orgasm into Renjun’s swollen hole.

He fucked it right into him, deep into Renjun’s guts so that he could taste him at the back of his throat, knowing who exactly he belonged to. Donghyuck. Not Mark, but Donghyuck. 

Renjun was his. 

Finally, Donghyuck collapsed over Renjun’s back. His breathing was ragged and heavy, but even then, he felt light as a feather. Giddy. He laughed, kissing Renjun’s nape, neck, and his cheek, smiling throughout. And Renjun did the same, laughing as he could barely breathe from his own exertion. 

As if everything was perfectly fine. As if they hadn’t just crossed a line they could never walk back on. 

For now, none of that mattered. But it would matter in the morning. It would matter once the buzz wore off and the reality set in. However, for now, Donghyuck didn’t want to think about any of that. For now, he wanted to bask in the joy he felt, finally being able to hold Renjun like he dreamed of for years. 

He didn’t want it to end. 

But it had to. 

♡♡♡

Donghyuck couldn’t look at Renjun. 

From the moment he woke up, Donghyuck felt sick to his stomach. 

What the hell did he do last night? And why did Renjun let him?

He looked over at the man sleeping next to him, his back still to Donghyuck, bodies pressed closely despite how dangerous that was as proven last night. 

Donghyuck squeezed his eyes shut, biting down on the inside of his cheeks, feeling like he had just been run over by a steamroller. He didn’t want to move, but he had to. He didn’t want to leave Renjun, but if he stayed even a second longer he would start heaving, sick to his stomach.

As carefully and silently as he could, Donghyuck unwrapped himself from Renjun and slipped out of bed. He quickly grabbed his phone and a hoodie he left strewn on the back of the chair in the corner of the room, rushing out of the room - but not before coming to a halt in the doorway, looking at Renjun peacefully asleep. He looked as beautiful as he always did, his hair messy against the pillow, a content look to him. 

Donghyuck slept with him.

He actually slept with him. 

What the fuck was he supposed to do now?

He certainly couldn’t tell Jaemin since that would only get him killed, nor could he tell Mark because that would also get him in deep shit - though, unlike Jaemin, he wouldn’t hurt him. 

Of course he wouldn’t, because Mark was a saint. He was good and right and such a sweetheart, so the only thing he would do would be look at Donghyuck with betrayal and heartache written all over him. It would shatter his heart - cause him to break down. It would kill him on the inside, and Donghyuck couldn’t do that to him. 

But he very clearly just did that; he trampled all over their friendship and trust by putting his own needs and wants before what was the correct thing to do. Donghyuck should have just excused himself. He should have gotten out of bed and either jerked off in the shower or slept on the couch. He should have anything but sleep with Renjun. 

But Renjun told him to-

No! He was drunk. Donghyuck was drunk. They were both drunk. 

What Renjun said was stupid but what Donghyuck did was even worse. He didn’t think clearly, and the alcohol clearly didn’t help him at that moment, but that doesn’t mean he didn’t know better. 

It was a mistake. A stupid mistake which Renjun would certainly regret once he woke up and realised he slept with Donghyuck instead of Mark. It would undoubtedly kill him on the inside too, and what was Donghyuck supposed to do about that? Laugh it off and apologise, saying that he got too carried away, drunk and desperate? Would Renjun be fine with that? Would he even remember what happened in the first place?

They did have enough wits about them last night to clean up for the most part, though it was haphazard at most, sloppy and the bare minimum to not be absolutely uncomfortable the whole time. The sheets weren’t changed, stained with dried up cum. 

But even then, the marks left of Renjun’s body would make it obvious that something happened over the night - be it the bruises on his neck or the ache in his lower back. 

Donghyuck slammed his head against the wall. How did he manage to fuck up this badly?

He wanted to run away and escape the consequences of his actions, but where to? If he barged into Jaemin’s place he would be found out by his friend instantly, and then he would be strangled to death - if not castrated right before that. He didn’t have work today, so he couldn’t use that as a means of refuge. And if he just left… He would still have to come back. 

He was screwed no matter what he did.

So he just had to live with his choices now and hope that he somehow didn’t find a way to make things worse still. 

It was relatively early in the morning - earlier than Donghyuck would usually wake up on his day off, though his early rise could be most likely explained by the guilt eating him up alive even during his few hours of respite from the world. 

Since he had little else to do, Donghyuck opted to clean up the apartment, needing a way to focus on something that wasn’t Renjun sleeping in the bed that they shared night and night again. 

Easier said than done.

But he managed, wiping down surfaces and getting very into cleaning the kitchen. In the end, he spent an hour trying to make the living space feel fresh and organised, taking great care as if to apologise to the residents for what sin he committed within the apartment walls. 

By the time he made himself a morning coffee and had a quick breakfast in the shape of a yoghurt pot, Renjun had finally gotten up as well. He heard the faint rustlings from the bedroom, heart sinking right down to the ground where it remained. Donghyuck’s grip on his spoon tightened, terrified of what would happen the second Renjun stepped out and faced him. 

He was scared. 

And then Renjun did finally show himself, shuffling along in a pair of slippers. He was still in his pyjamas - long bottoms and a loose t-shirt. He seemed… normal. 

“Morning,” Renjun uttered, voice still showing the remnants of sleep. 

Donghyuck struggled to respond, stuttering an awkward “morning” in return.

Did he forget?

Renjun moved around the kitchen, looking at the yoghurt pot in Donghyuck’s hold and getting an idea to grab one of his own. He pulled the fridge open and looked inside, his lips forming a frown when he realised Donghyuck took the last one - at least the last one of the flavour he wanted. Dejected, he pulled the second best option, grabbing a spoon before making a start on his breakfast.

The older man leaned against the counter opposite Donghyuck, the two men facing each other. However, whilst Renjun was able to look at Donghyuck, the younger man simply couldn’t; he averted his gaze, focusing on absolutely anything but Renjun. His coffee, the yoghurt pot, the floor, the counter, anything. 

And Renjun wasn’t stupid. He noticed it instantly. “Sleep well?” He asked, dragging his spoon around the edge of the plastic pot. “You’re up earlier than usual.”

“Ah- Yeah. All good. You?”

Renjun hummed, licking his spoon clean. “Same,” he replied. “Best sleep I’ve had in a while.”

What was Donghyuck supposed to do with that information? 

Donghyuck chuckled, awkward and strained. “You don’t drink a lot, do you? Guess it knocked you out real good, right?”

Renjun shrugged. “I didn’t have much,” he pointed out. That wasn’t making things any better for Donghyuck! “Neither did you,” Renjun added, fixing his eyes on Donghyuck all whilst the younger man couldn’t dare to look up and face him properly. “Did you?”

“A- Well- I guess I- Usually I-”

“Will you look at me?” Renjun said, firmer than before, demanding obedience. And god was Donghyuck weak to him, crumbling instantly. 

He exhaled, forcing his eyes to look up at Renjun standing opposite to him. The air around them was suffocating, thick enough to cut through. Donghyuck struggled to breathe, feeling faint already. And he only felt worse when he truly looked at Renjun, met with the sight of the man he wanted more than he could ever explain. 

Even now, after breaking all the rules, Donghyuck still couldn’t resist him. 

“Was that hard?” Renjun asked.

Donghyuck gulped, trying but failing miserably to act unaffected by something as simple as maintaining eye contact. 

When Donghyuck didn’t respond, Renjun clicked his tongue. He put his pot down and pushed himself up from the counter, taking one step, then two steps closer, breaching the distance between the two as if that wasn’t the worst thing he could possibly do right now. 

Donghyuck still didn’t know what to do, two sides engaged in a constant battle within his heart and mind. On one hand, he knew he needed to put an end to this before he could somehow fuck things up even more for himself, Renjun and Mark. But the other part of him - the side of him which craved Renjun since the first time he saw him - refused to be silenced, putting up a fight that would cause irreversible damage. 

And Renjun wasn’t making things easier in the slightest. If anything, he was making things actively worse the closer he got to Donghyuck. Worse still when he found himself fully in Donghyuck’s personal space, breathing the same air as him. 

Despite his smaller frame (barely an inch shorter, although noticeable slimmer), Renjun still managed to crowd Donghyuck with the sheer intensity of his gaze and determination, giving Donghyuck no opportunity to squirm his way out of whatever the hell this was. 

What now?

Renjun clenched his jaw, meeting Donghyuck’s eyes, his expression unreadable. Was he mad? Annoyed? Hurt? Donghyuck couldn’t actually tell. What he could decipher, however, was that he had something to tell Donghyuck.

“Are you going to keep ignoring me?”

Not what Donghyuck was expecting.

“I-”

“Shut up,” Renjun interrupted. Kind of counter-intuative. “I don’t want to hear some bullshit, stammering from you. So are you going to act like you can’t bear to face me, or will you actually grow a pair?”

That was closer to what Donghyuck expected. 

“Renjun…” Donghyuck uttered, shaky and nervous and terrified of all the things he wanted. 

His eyes flickered down to Renjun’s eyes and then even lower to his lips - lips which he had yet to kiss, to taste and cherish like he dreamed of. They were softly parted, a thin layer of lip gloss on them which made the two pink cushions look plump, so sweet and enticing. 

“Donghyuck,” Renjun echoed, mimicking the movement of Donghyuck’s eyes, finding great interest in the younger man’s lips. 

“Last night…” The words wouldn’t come out. But Renjun kept closing the distance between them, his hand coming up to stroke along Donghyuck’s jaw, pulling him in as if he wanted it too. “What happened last night, I- I-”

“I wanted it,” Renjun confessed, his words vibrating over Donghyuck’s lips. He looked up at the younger man, holding them as they were, both men frozen in place as they held onto the last strand of rationality. “What are you gonna do about that?”

And what could Donghyuck do?

His response came in the form of Donghyuck lunging forward, the distance between them nonexistent as Donghyuck pounced on Renjun, attaching himself to the man’s mouth as if a mere second longer apart would have killed him. And it probably would have. 

Donghyuck kissed Renjun with all the desire he had bottled up for years, a hand gripping onto Renjun’s waist, the other cupping his cheek so that Renjun couldn’t pull away. Now that he had him where he wanted, Donghyuck would never let him go. 

Perhaps he was too aggressive, or maybe Renjun just wasn’t fully prepared for what was to come, but Renjun stumbled backwards from the intensity of Donghyuck’s kiss. Yet even then, he didn’t part ways, bringing his second hand up to hold Donghyuck’s face, needing him just as badly as Donghyuck.

It was messy and desperate, lacking any shame or restraint. Donghyuck parted Renjun’s lips for him with his tongue, starving and dying to taste him. Renjun moaned into the heated exchange as Donghyuck made his hunger apparent, unable to resist Donghyuck’s eagerness. Even as they both struggled to breathe, holding onto each other with mirrored dependency, they couldn’t pull apart.

Donghyuck pushed Renjun further back until Renjun was met with resistance, the counter behind him getting in the way. But that wasn’t a big deal anyway; Donghyuck urged Renjun to jump on the counter, helping him with the hand on his waist, slotting in between Renjun’s spread legs once he had gotten on top. 

He wanted it too. 

Renjun wanted Donghyuck.

Mark could go fuck himself; Donghyuck wasn’t about to behave like a good friend right now. He was never a good friend to begin with. At least not when Renjun entered the picture. 

With Renjun right where Donghyuck wanted him, he smiled into their kiss, his heart lurching forward when he felt the curve of Renjun’s own lips against his own. 

He dropped his hands to Renjun’s waist, finding the hem of his t-shirt just so that he could yank it and pull it over Renjun’s head, breaking the kiss apart for that one painful second it took to strip him. As soon as he was done, they were back to devouring each other, airy and needy gasps filling the silence of the apartment. 

Donghyuck’s hands were unstoppable, feeling Renjun up, devoted to his body. His lithe waist, his soft tummy, pink nipples and the bumps of his spine. Donghyuck had to feel all of it - map every inch out with his hands and mouth or else he would go insane, yearning for this exact thing for years of his life, and now that he had Renjun at his disposal, he felt like he could burst at any second now. 

Needing him more than he could take, Donghyuck dipped down, his mouth leaving a trail of passionate kisses down Renjun’s chin, throat, and his sternum. Renjun let out an airy laugh, tipping his head back in bliss, his fingers tangled in Donghyuck’s hair. 

Donghyuck could probably die happy now. 

“That desperate?” Renjun teased.

“Like you wouldn’t believe,” Donghyuck retorted, his words a low thrum as he wrapped his mouth around Renjun’s cute nipple, sucking and nibbling on the sweet bud, relishing in the way it made Renjun squirm and gasp. 

Desperate was an understatement. Donghyuck would show Renjun just how little he understood of Donghyuck's insatiable craving for him. 

“That’s- That’s cute.”

Donghyuck smirked, coming off Renjun’s nipple with a wet noise, a string of saliva bridging between his lips and the sensitive bud. He looked back at Renjun, his eyes dark with lust for the older man. So needy that it caused Renjun to shudder, feeling just an ounce of the wanton kept trapped within Donghyuck’s aching heart. 

“Last night,” Donghyuck uttered, leaning forward, lips brushing over Renjun’s ear as he whispered, “was barely the tip of the iceberg. I want to fuck you until you can only say my name,” he continued, stroking his hands across Renjun’s torso. “Want you to cry and beg for more. I wanna make sure you’ll only ever be able to cum from my cock. That’s what I want.”

Renjun sucked in a sharp, shaky breath. He licked his lips, mouth parted, the air hot between them. “And what’s stopping you?” He asked. It was an open invitation. 

Donghyuck kissed along Renjun’s jaw, slowly making his way back towards Renjun’s saccharine lips. “Does he know about this?”

The older man exhaled, the noise vaguely amused. “Do you really care?”

Donghyuck hummed. “Not really,” he admitted. “Does that make me a bad person?”

“I don’t know. What does that make me?”

“Irresistable.”

Renjun kissed him, holding Donghyuck in place as this time around he poured out all of his desire into him, his languid tongue laced with the strongest drug known to man. And Donghyuck was hooked, letting it enter his bloodstream with reckless abandon. He let Renjun have all of him, feeling right at home within his embrace. It was a constant back and forth, both men searching for the same thing from each other, clawing further and deeper until they were just as wrecked and desperate.

The older man could hardly contain himself, pulling Donghyuck in closer and closer as if a single millimeter between their bodies physically pained him. He pulled and yanked on Donghyuck’s hair, his shirt, a hand at the back of his neck so that he could never separate. And when that still wasn’t enough, Renjun slipped off the counter all together, moaning as his front slid down along Donghyuck’s body. 

Donghyuck followed every movement from Renjun, his worshipping hands touching him wherever they could. He squeezed his sides, thumbs pressing over Renjun’s stomach, mind swimming at the soft resistance there; he wanted to kiss the delicate skin, bite and lick it, suck a gorgeous mark right there. And more than anything, he wanted to fuck Renjun deep enough he could feel himself when he pressed his hand over the man’s abdomen. Call him a sick pervert - he knew that already.

Perhaps Renjun wanted the same thing too, hating the fact they were still so far apart even as they were down each other’s throats, covetous hands all over one another. One of his hands dropped in between their bodies, finding the band of Donghyuck’s shorts, hooking his finger underneath, tugging the man even closer. And Donghyuck, ever the fool for Renjun, couldn’t resist the pull. 

He followed Renjun as the older man led him out of the kitchen, both stumbling over their feet as they were too preoccupied with their amorous exchange to pay attention as to where they were walking. 

They didn’t make it far in the end.

The bedroom was a mile away and neither man had the control to travel the distance. The couch had to make do.

Renjun tumbled backward, falling onto the couch with a surprised gasp. Donghyuck followed right after, stuck to Renjun and his honeyed mouth. The landing was softened by the cushions around them, some being knocked off onto the floor to make room for the pair. 

Last night, Donghyuck had barely gotten to see Renjun. It seemed like a blur thinking of it now, only ever feeling the man’s body against him. He could picture his back - the sinful arch of it - and the way his tight ass swallowed him up, perfect and snug and meant just for him. Pale, unblemished skin, smooth beneath his hands and mouth, practically begging to be ruined and marked up. A kiss here, an animalistic bite there. 

But he didn’t get to see him like this - the way it really mattered. His face, flushed, eyes drowned with matching lust. He didn’t get to kiss him back then, nor did he get to see him as he finally reached his peak. 

This time he would see all of it, eating up every moan and cry. He would watch the twitch of every muscle, making note of the furrow of his brow and the scrunch of his nose as he neared closer and closer, needing to see more and more until he finally witnessed the moment he had been waiting for with his own two eyes. 

With Renjun all laid out for him, Donghyuck felt a new type of frenzy possess him. He crawled over Renjun on the couch, pushing aside any cushion that so much as irritated him mildly. He dropped his hands from Renjun’s waist to his thighs, stroking along the porcelain skin, dropping inwards to spread him wide open. Renjun didn’t resist the touch, legs parting for Donghyuck. 

Donghyuck then forced them wider open, slotting himself in between. He guided Renjun’s legs to wrap around his waist, smiling into the kiss at how eagerly Renjun followed his orders, utterly pliant under him. He loved him like this, the older man giving into his own desires without a single ounce of resistance. 

Renjun wanted it more than Donghyuck could even begin to comprehend, and right now he really didn’t have the time to think about it, far too busy with getting the two of them off like they craved. 

Their frenzied kiss finally came to an end when Donghyuck pulled away, earning himself a disappointed and wounded whine from Renjun who very clearly didn’t want Donghyuck to leave him. 

It was beyond cute and Donghyuck couldn’t hold himself back when he leaned right back in for a brief kiss just to placate the older man. It lasted barely a second and Renjun frowned when Donghyuck pulled away once more, but this time around Donghyuck didn’t crumble and give into Renjun’s manipulative tactics. Instead, he drew a line of kisses along Renjun’s throat, sucking over the bump of his Adam’s apple.

Renjun shuddered, lifting his back up from the couch. He buried a hand in Donghyuck’s hair, his nails dragging over the base of his skull. The other came to Donghyuck’s shoulder, in part pushing him down, and in part clawing into the flesh so that he wouldn’t go any further. 

“Like this,” Donghyuck uttered, breathless and wanting. “You’ll let me fuck you like this.” Not a question. They were both past that now.

Renjun crooned, digging his nails into Donghyuck’s shoulder hard enough to leave a mark of his own. His hips stuttered, seeking the friction Donghyuck was taunting him with. 

So close, yet not close enough. 

He needed it, mouth parted in airy gasps as all Donghyuck could do was suck and nip his teeth over Renjun’s collarbone, smirking like the sadistic pervert that he was. Even now as he wanted nothing more than to fuck Renjun senseless, he still had it in him to tease him.

Some things simply never changed.

Though there was so much Donghyuck could handle too before he snapped. His breaking point came in the form of Renjun calling out his name. His name - not Mark’s. Such a simple thing, but it was exactly what he needed to finally toss aside any pretext of annoying Renjun in favour of actually fucking him until he was nothing but a limp mess of debilitating lust. 

Renjun needed him, and Donghyuck wasn’t about to leave him hanging.

Donghyuck nosed along Renjun’s neck, brushing under his ear as an obedient hand snaked down in between their bodies, following the curve of Renjun’s ass to the back of his pyjama bottoms. He tugged the fabric down just enough to gain access to what he wanted the most. 

A relieved sigh passed Renjun’s lips, his legs squeezing tighter where they were wrapped around Donghyuck’s waist, lifting himself up ever so slightly to grant Donghyuck much better access to his wanton entrance. Locked in place, Donghyuck now had no other choice than to give Renjun - and himself - what he wanted. 

He propped his weight onto one hand resting by Renjun’s head, the other seeking out his own shorts. Donghyuck tugged the fabric down and pulled out his cock, not wanting to waste any more time - they’ve had eight years of doing that anyway. Eight years of skirting around what they wanted.

Donghyuck groaned, stroking himself to full mast, dragging the trickling precum along his shaft to ease the glide of his hot hand. Beneath him, Renjun grew agitated, needing Donghyuck’s complete attention now. 

Hips rolling, Renjun was working himself up, each passing second without Donghyuck’s touch agonising. He wrapped his arms around Donghyuck’s shoulders, nails dragging over the flexed muscles in a silent plea.

“You still loosened up from last night?” Donghyuck asked, lips brushing against Renjun’s ear.

“Stop asking stupid questions and see for yourself,” Renjun retorted, stopping half-way from calling Donghyuck an idiot. 

His voice was strained and irritated, holding back a much nastier bite which Donghyuck was certain would make itself apparent if he waited even a minute longer from giving Renjun his fill. 

A part of him wanted to see just how mean he could get, though as it stood, Donghyuck was far too weak and horny to really delve into that right now. Perhaps at a better time when he didn’t feel like he could cum from Renjun saying his name a few more times. 

Donghyuck brought the hand working his cock to his mouth, slipping two digits inside to get them nice and wet for Renjun. Just enough for what was needed. Maybe next time they would actually make it to a bedroom that had lube stashed somewhere in the bedside table. Right now, however, they had to make do with the bare minimum. But that was fine, because as Donghyuck circled Renjun’s pucker and pushed inside, Renjun took him with relative ease. 

He was still so nice and soft, perfectly tender after their previous amorous exchange. Renjun was ready for him, whining and crooning as Donghyuck’s slender fingers rubbed against his velvety walls. He trembled with want, heat pooling in his stomach. 

“Donghyuck…”

He could honestly cum just like that. But he wouldn’t, knowing full well that Renjun would tease him relentlessly for it. 

Seeing as there was no need to prep him open, Donghyuck curled his two fingers inside of Renjun ever so slightly, pressing up against the tight confines just to hear a sultry moan spilling from the older man’s lips. Satisfied, he pulled out and found his cock, leading it over to the entrance. 

Donghyuck stilled with his cockhead rubbing over the wrinkled pucker, smearing his clear excitement over the entrance. He pulled himself up just enough to get a good look at Renjun’s face, needing to see him as Donghyuck slipped himself inside. 

Their eyes locked, both just as dark and blown out with immense craving. Both just as yearning, the hints of something far softer and genuine peeking through the hazy lust. It was far too intense to ignore, yet the only thing Donghyuck could do was lean forward, pressing his lips against Renjun’s own. It was just a kiss, but somehow it meant far more to both of them. 

Renjun’s hold on Donghyuck became tight and crushing, verging on painful. But even then, Donghyuck couldn’t help but still want more - to be even closer to him. With that, he pushed inside slowly, parting just enough from the kiss to witness Renjun furrow his brow, kiss-bruised lips parted in a silent cry. He clawed over Donghyuck’s back, gasping the deeper he went, eyes rolling to the back of his head once Donghyuck was completely submerged within his torrid walls. 

“Fuck,” Donghyuck uttered, his forehead pressed against Renjun. He breathed in Renjun’s hot exhales, his lungs filling up with the man’s own passion. It devoured him from within, spreading like wildfire - uncontrollable and all-consuming. Renjun felt divine all wrapped around him, even better than he felt the first time. So delicate and supple. Maddening. 

He drove Donghyuck utterly mad. 

“Renjun, fuck,” was all he could formulate, his mind a jumbled mess. Just how did he get here? How did he get to have Renjun all for himself, pliant and willing? Was he still drunk? Was he dreaming? Did he die in his sleep and somehow manage to get into heaven? “Baby, you can’t be real,” he continued, kissing Renjun, sucking on his tongue and biting his lip like a crazed animal. “Surely.”

In response, Renjun clenched around Donghyuck. Too fucking good.

Donghyuck grinned like a fool into their messy kiss, barely able to contain the weight of his buried affection. Eight years of desire and yearning, and he was meant to act normal? He wanted more than he could comprehend - more than he could handle all at once. 

On one hand, he wanted to pour all of his love into Renjun, fuck him nice and slow, annoy the living shit out of Renjun with just how much he was dragging things out. And then on the other hand, he wanted to fuck him stupid, carnal and ravenous. He wanted to hear Renjun cry and beg. He wanted to see just how much he could take, pushing him to his limits, pressing all his buttons just like he always did. 

How the hell was he supposed to act now?

“Are you gonna fuck me or not?” Renjun grumbled, squeezing his hold around Donghyuck. 

Donghyuck could work with that.

He smirked, slipping his tongue back into Renjun’s mouth, stuffing him full on both ends. It seemed like the right thing to do, especially if Renjun was going to be snarky with him. 

As Renjun melted into the kiss, Donghyuck bucked his hips, punching a sharp gasp out of Renjun. Still, Renjun held on, showing no signs of disapproval to Donghyuck’s teasing gimmicks. Nevertheless, Donghyuck actually got properly started, rolling his hips back and forth at an increasingly faster tempo. Shallow and slow at first, progressing towards deep and fast until he was drilling Renjun into the mattress. 

It was rough at first, the drag of their joined bodies sinful and raw. Donghyuck felt it, as did Renjun. Still tender and edging on sore, made even worse by the minimal lubricant. But even then, neither of them could resist the burn. Renjun moaned like he couldn’t get enough of it, treated so carelessly yet lovingly despite the ache. Donghyuck was also far too gone to consider the friction as anything but euphoric, fucking into Renjun’s enticing warmth as if his life depended on it. 

But it did get easier and smoother with each energetic thrust with Donghyuck getting closer and closer towards his orgasm. He could barely concentrate on his kiss with Renjun, the exchange becoming even sloppier with each passing second. Renjun didn’t seem to complain though, a string of expletives and Donghyuck’s name rolling off his tongue, the sound so much lovelier as it paired with the wet slaps of skin on skin, red and raw and carnal. 

Renjun clung onto Donghyuck, nails leaving scratch marks all over his back. It only spurred Donghyuck on even more, the pain acting as an aphrodisiac of its own. 

The movement of his hips was frenzied, fuelled by nothing but desire. He slammed himself right into Renjun, pushing it further with each thrust. He knew he should have been more careful - gentler and kinder - but the way Renjun moaned for him and pulled him in closer made that impossible. All Donghyuck could do was fuck into Renjun, his restraints slipping. 

And just how lovely Renjun sounded with each cry and moan. Just how wonderful were his gasps and whines - the way his body begged for more despite the unrelenting onslaught. Donghyuck couldn’t get enough. 

And still, he needed more. 

Donghyuck dragged his hand over Renjun’s torso down to his stomach, pressing down on his front just to make them both moan into the silence of the apartment. He could feel himself right there, his cock nestled inside - right where it belonged. It was always meant to be there. 

Renjun cried out, back arching and body tensing so much Donghyuck worried he could snap at any second. Still, he held on, fighting off his climax just so that he could bask in this bliss for a few moments longer. 

They were both cutting it close now.

Needing even more still, Donghyuck snaked his hands down to Renjun’s thighs, pushing the older man further down until he had him folded in a mating press. Renjun’s legs were forced around Donghyuck’s shoulders, his moans getting louder with the shift in positions. It felt like Donghyuck was burying himself even deeper, pounding right into Renjun with all his might. 

They were both getting desperate now, fanatic with their movements and sloppy in their kisses. 

Donghyuck wouldn’t have it any other way. 

“So close, baby,” he said, the words slurred against Renjun’s lips. “Inside. Please.”

Renjun’s breath got lodged in his throat, nodding along to Donghyuck’s depraved plea. He could hardly keep himself together as he was, thighs quivering from the straining position, body shaking as Donghyuck fucked into him with overwhelming vigour. He tried to hold onto Donghyuck yet his grip kept slipping, slowly losing the strength as pure bliss consumed him. All he could do by that point was take it. And he took it gladly, seeking purchase on the armrest behind his head.

“Donghyuck, please,” he begged - a pathetic, wet babble. 

“Again,” Donghyuck said, specks of white flickering behind his eyes. “Say my name. Say it.”

“Donghyuck.”

“Again.”

Renjun keened, biting down the delectable noise as Donghyuck hit the spot just right. 

“Again,” Donghyuck continued, wild and one-minded. “Say it again.”

And he did. Donghyuck’s name sounded like pure sin as Renjun moaned it, sultry and hot, dripping with nothing but wicked greed. It was a filthy, wanton thing, packaged up neatly in two drawn out syllables. It was perfect. It was everything Donghyuck ever wanted, served up on a silver platter right in front of him. And Renjun repeated it time and time again, each time packing even more of his longing into it - so much of it that it became debilitating. 

That one name brought tears to Renjun’s eyes, begging for release and perhaps something even more. 

Donghyuck couldn’t stand making Renjun wait any longer. He tossed aside any thought that wasn’t Renjun, forgetting how to breathe just so that Renjun could be his utmost priority. Nothing else was important. He proved that with the way his hips rocked into Renjun; he proved it with the way he kissed him like it was the only way he could survive, seeking his warmth and air, gulping down every whimper and sigh. 

There was only him and Renjun, the rest of the world didn’t matter. 

With a few more punctuated thrusts, Renjun snapped. An elastic band pulled too tight, he couldn’t hold back any more. In an instant, his body tensed, back arching as his orgasm crashed over him. A tidal wave reaching the skies, all coming down on him in an instant. He came untouched, the proof of his bliss pouring all over his chest. As he came, wave after wave, his body shook and trembled, muscles clenching. 

Donghyuck couldn’t bear it. It was too much now. Too tight. Too hot. 

He came with a guttural moan, stomach pulled taut and back strained. It felt endless, hips continuing their onslaught as he spilled right inside. The wet squelch rang through his ears, far louder than anything else. Renjun took him so well, swallowing every last drop, keeping it safe within the confines of his exquisite warmth. 

His hips stuttered, milking their orgasms to the fullest. Still, he didn’t stop until the pleasure became uncomfortable, both men overstimulated and squirming. 

Finally, they were both done. 

Exhausted and messy.

But still very giddy. 

Renjun was the first to show any signs of life, starting to laugh after a minute of silence, Donghyuck’s body weight crushing him. Laughter which bubbled and spread, warm and bright. It was contagious, and soon enough Donghyuck was also laughing, burying his face in the crook of Renjun’s neck. 

He inhaled, his smile growing wider as the scent which filled his nose was so intrinsically Renjun. It was so natural - a side of him he never thought he would actually get to experience. Yet here he was, getting to witness it first hand. 

They remained as they were for a while longer before the position became too much for Renjun. 

“Get off me,” he groaned, weakly trying to push Donghyuck away only to be met with a completely immovable object. Donghyuck was dead weight, far too blissed out to even think about controlling his limbs. “Come on!” Renjun continued, whining and groaning yet still laughing nevertheless. “You’re gonna crush me.”

And now Donghyuck had another reason to not move, grinning as Renjun got increasingly more annoyed. God, he loved when Renjun got mad and flustered. He really was a pervert beyond saving. 

“Donghyuck.”

“You feel so good,” Donghyuck murmured. “I don’t wanna pull away.”

“Well you have to because I can’t breathe.”

Donghyuck pulled up - though not enough to actually ease the pressure. He looked down at Renjun, his heart skipping more than just a single beat as he took in the man’s wrecked appearance, face flushed, eyes glossy, lips bruised with a noticeable line of drool down the corner of his mouth. 

Oh he could most definitely fuck him again. And again. And one more time for good measure. 

“I can help,” he said, opting to kiss him instead. At that, Renjun grumbled. Still, he didn’t try to pry Donghyuck off, more than happy to indulge him in this. 

Unlike their previous kisses, this one proved to be less chaotic. Sweet, even. Languid and at ease. 

Throughout it, Donghyuck felt his heart hammering in his chest as he was feeding it exactly what it wanted. It seemed like he could start crying, only keeping himself together with the thought that Renjun would have yet another thing to tease him over. 

But it was true; as he kissed Renjun, years of bottled up emotions were filling to spill - even more than they’ve done already. He had eight years of things he wanted to say, all pushed down into some nook of his heart, locked away so that they would never see the light of day. 

As he kissed Renjun more and more, he felt all of it resurfacing. 

Every little touch, every stolen glance, every glimmer of hope that he had to trample over so as to not truly delude himself into thinking he had a chance with Renjun… it all came bubbling up to the top. All of it, all at once. 

He eased his weight off Renjun, helping the older man get more comfortable, guiding his legs back down as their mouths kept each other company. With his muscles relaxed, Renjun smiled, letting out a soft and content sigh. 

Renjun was the first one to pull away, cupping Donghyuck’s face in his hands. He didn’t say anything, stroking his thumbs over the man’s cheeks, pressing the pad harder against the moles sprinkled across his skin. Perhaps there were no correct words to speak given their current circumstances, a heavy, dark cloud approaching. It loomed over them, yet they still tried to ignore it. After all, it was easier that way. 

“Renjun…”

The older man hummed, dragging his thumbs over to the corners of Donghyuck’s mouth. For the first time, Donghuck noticed a similar fear reflected in Renjun’s eyes. He was avoidant, yet it was far more than that. Clearly, Renjun wanted to say something, yet as they were, nothing felt right. 

What did this make them?

“Renjun, I-” He couldn’t find the words.

“It’s fine.”

Such a strange thing to say. 

So strange in fact that it made Donghyuck laugh. “Really? We just fucked on your couch whilst Mark’s away and that’s fine?”

Renjun nodded.

“Seriously?”

“I kissed you,” Renjun pointed out.

“I fucked you.” Last night. Before they had even kissed. They didn’t even look at each other then.

“And I let you.”

Oh.

“But M-”

“Mark isn’t here,” Renjun stated firmly. “He’s barely ever here,” he added, still holding onto Donghyuck. “And I let you fuck me, okay? So just- just don’t mention him, alright?”

Donghyuck sucked in his lips. He kept his eyes fixed on Renjun, noticing the way his expression changed whenever Mark was brought up. A downwards twitch of his mouth, tension in his jaw. And his eyes… they said the most. It was a fatigued look. Unimpressed. Not quite bitter, but not completely mournful. It sat somewhere in the middle. Destitute and wounded. 

It would have been easier if Mark simply didn’t exist. 

Easier for both of them. 

“Alright,” Donghyuck uttered. “There’s no need to mention him. Since he knows anyway. Right?”

It took Renjun a few seconds to understand exactly what Donghyuck was trying to say. But when it finally clicked, the complicated expression dissipated, morphing into an amused smile. “Yeah. He knows.”

It would be easier for them if they didn’t have to think about him.

A harmless little lie. 

“Now will you get off me?”

Donghyuck shook his head. “Make me.”

“Donghyuck, I swear to god I will beat you up if you don’t let me go clean up.”

“I’d love to see you try.”

And he did try. It was a valiant attempt - one which actually did work. He pushed Donghyuck’s face away and then proceeded to muster up as much energy as he could to kick Donghyuck off. The younger man laughed, falling back as Renjun finally freed himself. 

“You’re so strong,” he said through laughter. “I’ll never recover.”

“Good,” Renjun uttered, needing a second before he pulled himself up. It took a few attempts, but in the end he did get on his own two feet - albeit with a noticeable stagger. 

Donghyuck took pity on him, scooting over to place his hands on the man’s lower back, offering him some support as Renjun was reduced to a fawn learning to walk for the first time. 

“Easy there.”

“Fuck you.”

“If you want.” Donghyuck grinned, playfully squeezing Renjun’s side. 

Renjun rolled his eyes.

“Later?”

“Shut up.”

Donghyuck really couldn’t get enough of Renjun when he got like this. 

“And clean the couch,” Renjun added, glancing over behind himself.

“Huh? Why me?”

“What do you mean why me? It’s your cum!”

“I-” Well, he didn’t have any grounds to stand on now.

“Get to it! If it dries you’re buying a new one.”

Donghyuck clicked his tongue. “How much is it?”

“You really don’t want to know.”

Battle lost. Go figure. 

“Alright.”

Satisfied, Renjun hummed. “And get changed.”

“Anything else you want from me, darling?”

“A better attitude would be nice.”

“That’s a lie and you know it,” Donghyuck pointed out. He stood up, slotting himself behind Renjun. He wrapped his arms around the older man’s waist, resting his chin on Renjun’s shoulder. “You’d get bored if I was any nicer.”

Renjun smiled, glancing down at where Donghyuck’s hands were joined over his front. “Yeah. It would be dull without you,” he agreed, turning his head to the side, making eye contact with Donghyuck. “As annoying as you are.”

Donghyuck beamed, pinching Renjun’s tummy. It made the older man jolt, a poor attempt at a scowl forming across his face. “Only for you,” he said. It sounded like a promise, and if Donghyuck had to be honest, it was. In the end, he could only ever be like this with Renjun. And by this… well, he could only ever love Renjun like this. 

“God, you’re disgusting.”

Donghyuck laughed, not feeling any malice within Renjun’s words. He nodded, not arguing with that. 

He let Renjun go, giving his ass a light tap on his way out just to have the older man jolt and look back at him, cheeks pink, mouth pursed in an adorable frown. 

With him gone, Donghyuck did actually clean up. Even if he could take Renjun in a fight, the older man did also instill the fear of god in him - especially when it came to things he was particular in, such as the state of his clothes or furniture as was the case now. 

Donghyuck had prior experience when he accidentally spilled hot sauce on Renjun’s shirt - one which he loved very much. He tried to clean it off but only made things worse, smearing the vibrant red into the light pink fabric. Renjun got so mad that Donghyuck genuinely thought he would finally meet his end on that day. 

He didn’t want to know what Renjun would do to him if he let his cum dry on the couch. They’d probably have to burn it, and Renjun may opt to toss Donghyuck into that raging fire. Not that Donghyuck would really mind.

He cleaned the mess up to the best of his abilities, relieved to find that no mark was left in place. Next time, they should use a blanket underneath them. Or fuck in bed. Or on a surface much easier to clean. Maybe even in the shower - that would be fun. 

Speaking of showers, Donghyuck heard the water running. He looked down at himself and considered taking a quick shower as well. 

Would Renjun hiss and scratch if he tried to sneak in with him? There was only one way to see. And so, Donghyuck walked into Renjun’s bedroom, taking a look at the state of the place. It was larger than the guest one (though that was a given) and it definitely looked more lived in. However, there was far more of Renjun there than Mark. 

It was instantly obvious which side of the bed belonged to who given the state of the bedside table. The left one only had a lamp and a small potted plant that looked fake, only serving the purpose of making the spot look less bland. 

The other side, clearly Renjun’s, had a much nicer adjustable lamp, two scented candles, a real potted plant of his own, a small bottle of hand moisturizer, and a book. 

He had more pillows on his side of the bed as well as a throw blanket which looked to be knitted by himself - it was a hobby of his after all, and Donghyuck still had the scarf Renjun made for him a few Christmases ago. He made Mark one too, but out of their friend group, they were the only two to receive one. It wasn’t something Donghyuck really thought too much about, opting to not hurt himself by believing it meant anything more than Renjun running out of wool before getting around to making four more scarves. 

The overall decor also screamed Renjun as opposed to Mark. The feature wall was a warm, muted yellow tone, making the room feel more pleasant and bright. It wasn’t something Donghyuck saw Mark ever picking out, knowing his best friend well enough to know he had very little taste when it came to interior decor. Besides, he was always fonder of cooler shades - blues, greens, whites and greys. 

Donghyuck gave the room another once over, trying to find any other sign of Mark within the space. He came out empty handed. Not even a framed photo. Just a bare bedside table. As if he didn’t even live here.

With his short snooping session over, Donghyuck’s interest towards the en-suite bathroom resumed. He glanced down at the door handle, wondering if he should knock or not. They did fuck, and they did kiss, and clearly there was something going on, but was stepping unannounced when Renjun was taking a shower going too far? Maybe. Maybe not.

The water stopped.

Donghyuck knocked in the end.

“Did you clog the other toilet?” Renjun asked when Donghyuck opened the door, stepping into the steam filled bathroom. 

Donghyuck didn’t bother responding to that. “I need a shower.”

“I won’t argue with that.”

“Wow.”

Renjun chuckled, patting himself down with his towel, discarding it once he was done, not caring that Donghyuck could see him completely naked now. He opened up one of the cabinets, pulling out a tub of some fancy body moisturiser and scooping it with his fingers. 

“If you want to shower then go ahead,” he said. No teasing about why he had to come here instead of the guest bathroom. No other comments. It just seemed… normal. 

“You should have waited,” Donghyuck said. “Or taken a longer shower.”

“Not my fault you took your sweet time,” Renjun pointed out, massaging the moisturiser over his thigh, rubbing it in nice and slow. Donghyuck would have gladly done it for him - anything to have an excuse to feel him up. “Either way, nothing would have happened,” he added, patting the milky substance into his skin before reaching for the tub again. “Showers are my personal time.”

“I could’ve washed your hair.”

“You would have blinded me,” Renjun argued.

“I would never. That sounds more like something you would do.”

After giving it a moment of consideration, Renjun snorted. “Yeah. Probably.”

“At least you’re honest.”

Donghyuck decided to finally strip, tossing his shorts and hoodie off to the side. Renjun continued with his post shower routine, pampering himself up. It was fascinating to watch him go at it and clearly the older man noticed Donghyuck spying on him from the shower, catching his eyes in the reflection of the mirror. They held their gazes, both men cracking into smiles in a split second. 

“Focus on yourself, would you?”

“Easier said than done, Renjunnie,” Donghyuck replied. “I’d rather watch you.”

“Creep.”

“Maybe.”

Very much so.

Still, Renjun seemed to find it endearing if his response was anything to go by. The tips of his ears reddened and he glanced down. He let out an airy chuckle, shaking his head. 

Donghyuck couldn’t get enough of him. He wanted to see his smile - feel it against his lips as he kissed him. Could he kiss him like he wanted? Whenever he wanted? All signs pointed to yes, but for how long did he have the green light? 

“I want a coffee,” Renjun mused.

“Then make some. Or is this your way of telling me to make you coffee? Bossy, aren’t you?”

Renjun rolled his eyes. “No. I was implying I want to go out,” he explained. “With you. My treat.”

Stumped, Donghyuck paused mid scrub. “Oh…” That felt… Well, Donghyuck didn’t really know how it felt. After all, the pair had gone out together before so it wasn’t anything new. 

Yet it felt different. More like a date than whatever the hell they’ve been doing up to this point. And the way Renjun spoke with a thin line of shyness sealed the deal that this wasn’t just a friendly outing.

With how long it was taking Donghyuck to respond, Renjun grew visibly uneasy.

Donghyuck had to do something about that. 

“Damn. You’re being so nice it’s actually kind of creepy,” he teased in an attempt to lighten the mood. Thankfully, it worked. Because that was their thing: burying all the things they wanted to really say behind jokes and feigned annoyance. “Who knew all you needed to be nice was a good fuck.”

Renjun laughed, turning around to face Donghyuck standing under the shower. “I am always nice.”

Donghyuck pulled a face as if to say “are you sure about that?”

The older man scoffed. “I always pay when we go out!”

“Oh, so are you calling me a leech now?”

“A parasite might be a better term for it. Harder to get rid of.”

“A very cute parasite.”

“Don’t flatter yourself too much. And don’t take too long in there,” Renjun added, getting ready to leave. “I want you ready within the hour.” That was final. 

“Alright. Since you asked me so nicely.”

♡♡♡

Their coffee outing turned into far more than that. At first, it was bordering on awkward with how easily flustered they both seemed to get at the slightest thing - an innocent brush of their hands or shoulders, or whenever they held eye contact for a second too long. 

But it wasn’t the uncomfortable type of awkward; after all, they were far too used to each other to enter that sort of territory. Instead, it was… shy? Giddy? Like two guys on a first date.

Donghyuck couldn’t be normal about it. But neither could Renjun, apparently. 

One coffee in and a shared slice of cake later, the air shifted and relaxed. The events of last night and this morning were left unspoken but very much not forgotten. 

Renjun bumped his foot against Donghyuck under the table - innocent and typical for them if not for the faint yet sly curve of his lips. Donghyuck retaliated, rubbing the toe of his shoe along Renjun’s ankle, teasing under the hem of his trousers. They didn’t take it further but they didn’t have to.

With that, things became more comfortable. It was just like any other time they would go out, however, after stepping out of the cafe, Renjun sought out Donghyuck’s hand. Usually, if Donghyuck ever tried to hold him, Renjun would swat his hands away or make a scene only to give in by the end. It was different this time around, as if to show to Donghyuck that this was something that he wanted, the walls between them dropped long enough for the truth to become apparent. 

Donghyuck held onto Renjun’s hand like he feared the illusion would burst at any second.

After the coffee, Renjun decided he still wanted to walk around. Hence, Donghyuck was dragged out and about to different stores, forced to carry all of Renjun’s shopping bags.

“This is why you wanted me to come, right?” Donghyuck asked as Renjun handed him another bag to lug around. 

“Are you complaining?”

“What do you think?”

Renjun smirked. “I always knew you loved being my personal assistant,” he teased. “I still want to get a new pair of shoes. Think you can handle that?”

“Am I at least being compensated for this?” 

The older man gave Donghyuck a once over, both hands occupied with bags. He smiled, amused by the sight. “Maybe,” he replied, stepping closer to press a light and lingering kiss to Donghyuck’s lips. When he pulled away, Donghyuck was already breathless, his heart pounding, a faint whimper at the back of his throat. Oh he was utterly whipped. 

“You said you wanted shoes?” Donghyuck asked, energised and willing to carry anything Renjun threw his way. His renewed enthusiasm caused Renjun to laugh as he reached for some of the bags in Donghyuck’s grasp. He took them from him, his smile soft and fond as he did so.

“Not really,” he stated. “I’m tired. Plus my back hurts.” With that, he made sure to look Donghyuck right in the eyes, the blame falling on him. “I’ve had enough thrills for the day.”

“If you say so,” Donghyuck mused. “Though… Maybe I can change your mind later?”

“You’ll have to be very convincing.”

The younger man smirked, leaning his face in to steal a kiss from Renjun. “Challenge accepted.”

♡♡♡

He wasn’t convincing enough, apparently. 

Though, to be honest, Donghyuck was also exhausted by the end of the day. All that shopping took a toll on him, and when he decided to make himself useful and cook dinner later on, Donghyuck used all of the energy for the day. It had been zapped out of him even though he wasn’t usually this lazy. 

Maybe the emotional rollercoaster he went through in the span of twenty-four hours rinsed him completely dry.

Not that he was complaining.

Renjun enjoyed the food Donghyuck cooked up, and they spent the quiet evening together on the (clean) couch. The older man brought his laptop out at some point, clicked around, typed a few emails and then put it away. 

Out of sight, out of mind. 

When Donghyuck asked if it was for work, Renjun hummed. Curious still, Donghyuck asked a few more questions; he thought that he might as well get to know as much as he could. Even Mark didn’t really know how to explain what Renjun did for a living other than saying he ran his own business, which was fair enough. 

Still, Renjun was happy to talk more about it with Donghyuck, his eyes lighting up as he did so. It was endearing. 

But in the end, Renjun wasn’t in the mood to think about work all too much. Instead, he preferred to curl up next to Donghyuck, the position feeling natural as the younger man wrapped his arm around Renjun’s middle, pulling him in closer. Renjun fit perfectly by his side, so much so that Donghyuck was certain that was exactly where he belonged.

As they watched a drama of Renjun’s choice, Donghyuck casually ran his hands over Renjun’s side, his arms, and back. Anything to feel him. 

“We should probably go out more often,” Renjun mused, his words slightly muffled with how his cheeks were pressed against Donghyuck’s chest. “I feel like we used to spend more time together in the past.”

Donghyuck hummed. “We still hang out.”

“Rarely alone.”

And that was true. Why was that? 

“Usually with Chenle or Jaemin,” Renjun added. Very rarely with Mark. It was usually just Mark and Donghyuck, Renjun not making an appearance. Whose idea was that? It was as if there was a buffer between them at all times. Their time alone was kept to a minimum, kept to a quick coffee and catch up but never more. 

Clearly, they couldn’t be trusted to be alone together. 

“Yeah… We should do something about that. And you know me, I’m free most of the time,” Donghyuck said. “Especially for you,” he added, hammering the point across. He would always make time for Renjun, dropping everything for him. 

“You barely ask me out first.”

“Ah… Well, I never know if you’re busy or not,” Donghyuck explained. “And when Mark’s around it’s like… You could be going on a date or something.”

Hearing that, Renjun scoffed. “A date,” he echoed, finding the idea ridiculous. “Yeah, right.”

“What? He doesn’t take you out on dates? He always talks about all the things he has planned for you two,” Donghyuck pointed out. 

He had been subjected to what felt like torture time and time again, forced to listen and smile as his best friend talked about the restaurants he was going to take Renjun to. And to make things even worse, Donghyuck even gave Mark suggestions - places he knew Renjun would love, be it from hearing him mention them, or because he simply understood Renjun’s tastes.

Places he would have loved to take Renjun given the chance. 

Maybe he still had a chance.

“Not really,” Renjun replied. “He says he will, but it’s… complicated.”

“Ah.”

“He leaves me waiting,” Renjun explained. 

Renjun did previously mention being left waiting in hotel rooms, but Donghyuck didn’t think that extended past work trips. But it made sense; Mark was a workaholic through and through, allowing his career to take over his life, disappearing from the face of the earth on numerous occasions. 

Donghyuck was more than used to checking up on his best friend after not hearing him for multiple weeks straight. Of course, Mark had Renjun to look after him when things got that bad, but Donghyuck just always assumed that Mark still had the time to be there with his boyfriend. 

He then thought of the bedroom, no signs of Mark whatsoever. 

Was he ever present?

“He’ll make plans, set dates and times and everything seems fine, but then he just… forgets,” Renjun continued, making himself smaller in Donghyuck’s hold. “Or more like he loses track of time, because he does remember. He’ll get back and apologise and make another promise, and they all stack up on top of one another until the point he actually follows through. And that one night out makes up for everything. Then it repeats.”

How was Donghyuck meant to react to that? He didn’t ever think Mark would be so… neglectful? At least not to Renjun - the same Renjun who gave him his own time and affection. On the surface, the pair always looked so happy and perfect. He would have never expected things to be so frayed between them. 

Apologies didn’t seem fitting. 

“We can go out,” Donghyuck assured. “Whenever you want.”

“Anytime?”

“Warn me in advance,” Donghyuck said. “I unfortunately have a job five days a week. Evenings are fine - as are weekends. I have a very predictable schedule.”

“Makes things easy.”

“Sure does.”

Renjun smiled to himself, stroking his hand over Donghyuck’s front - nothing suggestive nor provocative, simply meant to remind himself where he was. “There’s this restaurant I wanted to go to for a while,” Renjun stated. “The mains apparently are whatever, but the desserts are supposed to be amazing. I’d want to go just for those. Mark mentioned it a while back and we just never went.”

Donghyuck bit on the inside of his cheek, hit with a peculiar mixture of glee at Renjun’s confession. If he was right, that was one of the spots Donghyuck suggested to Mark at least two months ago. And here Renjun was now, suggesting that they could go together. Like a date. 

“I think I know the spot,” Donghyuck admitted. 

“You do?”

The younger man nodded, giving Renjun’s side a light squeeze. “Yeah. If you’re down we can even go after I get back from work? We could meet up there.”

Simple as that. 

“You’ll have to forgive me though; I won’t look my best.”

Renjun chuckled. “That’s fine. You barely ever dress up anyway.”

“I do!”

“Once in a blue moon,” Renjun argued. “Your wardrobe is fifty percent sweats and graphic tees.”

“Yeah well the other half is nice. And don’t act like you hate my casual fits! I know you think I look hot in them.”

“That’s one way to put it.”

“Oh come on.”

Renjun laughed. “You look like a guy that plays League for twelve hours a day. And you’re not even good at it.”

“Low fucking blow.”

“Did I lie?”

Donghyuck scowled, clenching his jaw. If he tried to fight back he would only be setting himself up for further humiliation. And so, he allowed Renjun to win this time around. His lack of response made Renjun laugh, smug as he cuddled himself even closer to Donghyuck as if that would make the younger man feel any better (it did).

“I guess I can try and dress up one day of the week,” Donghyuck mused. “Since it bothers you that much.”

“Thank you.”

By the end of the night, as Donghyuck found himself dozing off even before Renjun, the older man pulled himself off the couch and urged Donghyuck to do the same. However, before Donghyuck could take the turn towards the guest bedroom, Renjun yanked on his hand and pulled him in the other direction towards his own bedroom. Donghyuck was startled, his tiredness getting knocked out of him momentarily. 

“Did you get your directions mixed up?”

Renjun huffed, giving Donghyuck’s hand another tug. At that, Donghyuck was forced to his side. “Are you being slow on purpose?”

“It doesn’t help when you’re being vague.”

With that, Renjun rolled his eyes. “My bed’s nicer,” he stated. “And the guest bedroom is depressing.”

“I think it’s quite nice.”

“So you want to sleep there? Alone?”

“Are you saying you’re not going to sneak in to cuddle with me?”

“That’s exactly what I’m saying,” Renjun confirmed, wanting to persuade Donghyuck to join him. Then again, Donghyuck needed very little to be swayed by him. Although, he didn’t know if sleeping in Renjun and Mark’s bedroom was something he was mentally prepared for. 

His expression must have given him away since Renjun opted to soften his demeanour, stepping closer to Donghyuck, stroking his hand across Donghyuck’s cheek so that he would look at him. 

Donghyuck exhaled, a shiver running down his spine. “Are you sure?”

“Very sure,” Renjun assured. 

A part of Donghyuck still wanted to stupidly ask if Mark knew. But he didn’t know. He would never know. 

Donghyuck allowed Renjun to pull him towards the bedroom. He didn’t fight against it, submitting completely to the older man, melting under his touch when Renjun kissed him as soon as they stepped through the doorway. 

It felt different than before; now, it seemed like a kiss which said “you’re finally here” - a greeting, desperate and wanting. 

It overwhelmed Donghyuck, hot tears prickling behind his eyes. He could only kiss Renjun back, the two of them stumbling across the bedroom.

They were unsteady, laughing when they bumped into the edge of the bed. 

“Not now,” Renjun said, putting Donghyuck to a stop. “Sorry.”

Donghyuck shook his head, pulling away to look at Renjun. He was greedy, but there was more to his desires than just sex. As he looked at Renjun, his heart swelled. He hugged him tight, burying his face against Renjun’s shoulder. 

“And you called me clingy.”

“Shut up.”

Renjun laughed, stroking his hand over Donghyuck’s back. “Alright. But are you gonna let me get changed or are we staying like this all night?”

Unfortunately, Donghyuck did pry himself off Renjun to give them both the chance to get ready for bed. When they were finally washed up and changed, Renjun slipped into his side of the bed first, looking at Donghyuck as he hovered by the other edge of the bed, waiting silently for permission. His eyes were on the empty bedside table, the lack of signs of another person’s presence. In a way, it made it easier to pretend that there really never was anyone there that he was replacing. 

And when Renjun pulled the covers back for him, patting the empty spot in the bed, Donghyuck tossed aside any guilt bubbling inside of him. He made himself comfortable in bed, the mattress nice and firm. It only took Renjun a second before he cuddled up next to Donghyuck.

“It’s better, isn’t it?” Renjun asked.

“Yeah. It is.”

♡♡♡

Donghyuck got used to waking up with Renjun in his arms. He got used to seeing his face first thing in the morning, serene and relaxed, Renjun curled up by his side. It was a sight he would never take for granted, cherishing each morning where he woke up before Renjun, simply staring at him until the older man stirred awake. 

And when he did, he would greet Donghyuck with a shy smile, calling him a weirdo or creep, kissing him good morning nevertheless. Languid and sweet, starting the day with each other.

Unfortunately, Donghyuck did have to get up early for work. That annoyed Renjun since he would have preferred to lay in for a few more hours, but he still got up alongside Donghyuck. He would stretch and groan, his pyjamas riding up and revealing a tantalising sliver of tummy that would drive Donghyuck insane - so much so that he would set aside some time in his morning routine just to kiss and touch him as he pleased. 

By Wednesday, Donghyuck had his alarm set a solid twenty minutes earlier just so that he could get his fill of Renjun first thing in the morning. The older man, eyes still thick with sleep, laughed as Donghyuck had Renjun pinned underneath. He crooned and uttered words which were far too slurred for Donghyuck to comprehend, though he was certain they were nothing more than the usual teasing he was used to from the older man. He gasped and laughed brighter and happier when Donghyuck pushed his shirt up and kissed and sucked along the line of his stomach. 

Donghyuck was put in a trance first thing in the morning, only able to think about the beauty sharing the bed with him. He had to have all of him, worshipping his body at the crack of dawn, lucky to have been blessed with Renjun’s presence. He held Renjun firm yet delicate, squeezing his sides and spreading his thighs for him. And once Renjun was nice and worked up from all his ministrations, Donghyuck tugged his pyjama bottoms down, pulling out Renjun’s weeping cock out to continue his display of devotion. 

A gorgeous, trembling whine bounced across the bedroom walls when Donghyuck licked along the curve of the erection up to the tip, suckling over the leaking cockhead. He teased Renjun with his tongue, slipping it over the slit, pressing down and sucking to have the older man shaking and tensing beneath him. And then, once Renjun was pulled taught, whimpering and gasping for more, Donghyuck sank down. 

He took all of him in his mouth with ease, gulping around the length. Renjun moaned, his thighs clenching. Donghyuck massaged the tensed muscles, sparing Renjun a devilish smirk before he started to bob his head up and down. Drool and precum coated the length, nice and wet, easing the glide. Donghyuck slurped it all up, drinking up every last drop of Renjun. 

The older man’s moans were a heavenly choir in Donghyuck’s ears and he simply had to hear more. And so, he picked up the pace, hollowing his cheeks so that the drag would be delectable. Up and down, up and down, and Renjun was grasping onto the last frayed thread. It took very little for him to finally let go, body constricted as he came in a steady, strong burst into Donghyuck’s keen mouth. 

Donghyuck milked him dry until Renjun was twitching from overstimulation, tears of pure bliss rolling down his temples. Only then did he pull off, a crazed glee written all across his expression. He kissed Renjun, allowing the older man to taste himself on Donghyuck’s tongue, hot and heady. 

It was the best way to start the day.

Made even better still when Renjun offered to finish Donghyuck off, using his hand to stroke Donghyuck to completion as they kissed through it all. 

That had to be the best morning of Donghyuck’s life. 

Afterwards, Donghyuck sadly actually had to get up and ready. With that, he washed and dressed up before heading over to the kitchen where he made himself and Renjun coffee and a light breakfast. 

Now that they woke up together, Donghyuck thought it would be nice if he actually prepared something for them both - no matter how small. He was by no means a chef nor did he really care about a balanced meal (as proven by his choices for lunch at work) but now that he was around Renjun it seemed different. Like he maybe should care. After all, he saw what the two of them usually had for dinner, mostly opting for takeout, and honestly that didn’t sit all too well with Donghyuck. 

And so, Donghyuck started to make meal plans in his head. Not just for himself, but also for Renjun. 

“I’m gonna be a bit later tonight,” Donghyuck said when he saw Renjun making his way towards the kitchen. The older man came to stand behind him, hugging Donghyuck from behind. 

“Why?”

“Gonna stop by and get a few things from the shop,” Donghyuck explained. “I have plans for dinner.”

“We can just order out,” Renjun suggested, earning himself a chuckle from Donghyuck. 

“I know. But I want to cook. There’s only so much take out you can have before it takes a toll on you.”

Renjun hummed. “Okay. Then just tell me what to get; I’ll go during the day.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. It’s not like I have any other plans for the day. I might drag Chenle out. Just text me what I need to get.”

“Sounds good.”

They spent their morning together, finding ways to be constantly touching until the very last moment in which they finally had to part for the day ahead. Renjun walked Donghyuck to the door, bidding farewells with a long parting kiss - one which would linger with Donghyuck the entire day, beckoning him to come back as soon as he could. 

It was a kiss which made you crazier with each second spent apart. It only made Donghyuck wonder how anyone could ever spend longer than a few hours away from Renjun. How could anyone ever be strong enough to not come running back to him?

At work, everything was relatively the same. Jaemin did notice that Donghyuck seemed happier and livelier than usual, however he didn’t question it the way Donghyuck thought he would. As far as he was concerned, Donghyuck was simply being a delusional pervert as usual. In a way, he wasn’t wrong, but what he didn’t know was that Donghyuck was not delusional this time around. 

Besides, Jaemin had plenty to talk about to Donghyuck during their breaks that the topic of Donghyuck’s current place of residence didn’t come up even once. Perhaps Jaemin also didn’t think Donghyuck would be cruel and stupid enough to betray his own best friend and make a move on Renjun. Perhaps he had too much faith in Donghyuck. 

He listened to his friend and colleague talk, though somewhere along the way Donghyuck zoned out in favour of thinking of getting back home to Renjun. 

The past few days had been wonderful, domestic bliss. Waking up side by side and then going to sleep together. Evenings spent in each other’s presence, be it doing menial tasks like washing up or hoovering the apartment, or watching a movie on the T.V. Renjun would wait for him to get back from work, his expression and the light in his eyes every time Donghyuck stepped through the doors were reason enough to never leave him again, no matter how unfeasible that sounded. 

Even with their newly established proximity, they were still as always. Renjun complained about something trivial Donghyuck did, and Donghyuck still got on Renjun’s nerves, squeezing his waist, giving his ass a playful spank, or getting cuteness aggression around the older man. But this time around, instead of Renjun shoving him off or finding a way to put distance between them one way or another, Renjun simply laughed and admitted defeat. His whines were adorable, grumbling and complaining all whilst smiling like a lovesick fool. 

Donghyuck had to kiss him every chance he had. 

Sharing a bed was also dangerous. Extremely dangerous. 

Donghyuck was honestly far too weak of a man to handle Renjun. The older man would flop on the bed and lounge around, waiting for Donghyuck to finish up in the bathroom. And when Donghyuck did finally come back, he was met with the image of pure temptation laid out before. He succumbed to his desires every single time, kissing along Renjun’s bare legs up to the curve of his ass, welcomed in by Renjun who pointed him to where the lube was.

Still, he couldn’t get enough of him. And neither could Renjun, apparently, enticing Donghyuck time and time again, egging him on for just one more round. Honestly, Donghyuck had never seen him as lively as he was in bed, face scrunched up in continuous pleasure, Donghyuck’s name a sweet melody on his tongue. 

“You could at least pretend you’re listening to me,” Jaemin grumbled, tossing a neatly and finely chopped cucumber cube at Donghyuck’s forehead. 

“I’m listening!”

“Yeah, right! You’re grinning like a fu-” Jaemin paused himself, remembering where exactly he was. The last thing he needed was parents complaining that their kids started swearing after staying at the daycare he was working in. “There’s no way that what I’m saying right now is making you this giddy.” He sighed, giving his food an annoyed poke. “Anything you want to share with the class?”

Not really.

“Did you cut your hair?” Donghyuck asked.

Jaemin rolled his eyes. 

He didn’t prod any further though. 

And soon enough, Donghyuck was back home. 

Renjun greeted him in the entrance way, leaning against the wall as he watched Donghyuck kick off his shoes and slip out of his coat. “Hi,” he uttered, warm and sweet. “Had a good day?”

“Better now that I’m back,” Donghyuck replied, playful and obnoxiously cheesy, made even worse by the fact that he pulled Renjun in for a kiss. The older found the whole thing utterly ridiculous, though he still kissed Donghyuck back, cupping his face, a wide smile on his lips. “You?”

“Better now that you’re back,” Renjun said, glee sparking behind his eyes when Donghyuck smiled back, heart weak to Renjun. It was unfair just how much he affected Donghyuck and his poor, whipped heart. Absolutely unfair, but Donghyuck wouldn’t change a thing. “I went shopping.”

“Did Chenle tag along?”

Renjun hummed. “He even made suggestions for dinner. So I ended up getting more than you asked for. I did like the sound of one of the dishes he suggested…”

“That’s fine. I can be swayed,” Donghyuck assured. “But only if you help me out.”

“I’m subpar in the kitchen.”

“So am I! With the two of us we make like… an average cook?”

Renjun snorted, amused. “Average might be putting it nicely.”

“Have some faith, Renjunnie! We’ll make the best home cooked dinner you’ve ever had.”

“No pressure.”

Donghyuck leaned in, pressing a quick kiss to Renjun’s lips. “No pressure.”

Dinner went… It went well. Of course, there were a few mishaps here and there, but it was overwhelmingly positive. Renjun helped out in the kitchen, trying his best with chopping up vegetables and meat only to decide it was too boring for him. With that, he made annoying Donghyuck his new mission. 

Usually, it would have been the other way around, however given his good mood, Renjun took the role of the instigator on this occasion. He purposefully got in Donghyuck’s way, waiting to see how long it would take the younger man to actually realise that it wasn’t an accident (five times), only to laugh when Donghyuck caught him, wrapping his arms around his waist and lifting him up. 

Despite being the one to start it, Renjun was the most vocal with his complaints and insults, telling Donghyuck to put him down or else he would start biting. 

Donghyuck put him down, flipped him around, and kissed all of Renjun’s words down. It worked miracles, successfully shutting Renjun up. Still, the older man was in a playful mood, bumping shoulders with Donghyuck as they cooked side by side. 

And honestly, Donghyuck felt the same, struck with some sort of beam of pure domestic bliss. It made him yearn to be by Renjun’s side, constantly looking for ways to be close to him in the simplest and most menial ways possible. He wanted to cook with him, wash the dishes, fold the laundry - do absolutely anything with him. He yearned for every single day to be just like this. 

They ate at the kitchen table, kicking their feet under the table. The food turned out good despite how much they were goofing around when they were making it, so that was a plus. 

Renjun asked Donghyuck about work, and in turn Donghyuck asked about Renjun’s own day. Donghyuck shared some of the gossip he learned from Jaemin, and Renjun did the same, having far more to say thanks to Chenle knowing everything about everyone. Then, once they finished up, Donghyuck cleared the table as Renjun made them a late evening drink.

“There’s leftovers,” Renjun mused, looking over at the pans. “You want me to pack them up for you?”

“For me?”

“Yeah, who else? You can take them to work,” Renjun said. “What do you even have for lunch?”

“Cup ramen?”

Hearing that, Renjun looked at Donghyuck with pure shock and perhaps even some disgust. “Seriously?”

Bashful, Donghyuck nodded.

“Yeah, you are taking this to work.” Renjun rummaged through the cupboards, pulling out some tupperware for Donghyuck. He piled a hefty portion of their dinner into one of the boxes, sealing it shut. It was more than Donghyuck would have given himself, typically running on far less to get through the day, but he wasn’t about to complain. 

Donghyuck smiled as he looked down at the packed lunch, and then he smiled even more when he looked up to find Renjun - a faint frown written across his face. He leaned in to kiss it away. “Thank you.”

The tension in Renjun’s brow smoothed out, a soft sigh passing his lips as he gladly accepted Donghyuck’s kiss. “I can make dinner tomorrow if you want.”

“By yourself?”

Renjun punched Donghyuck’s arm, not thrilled by the tone the younger man used. “I can manage!”

Amused, Donghyuck laughed and nodded. “Of course. You’re so talented, Renjunnie. A chef unlike no other.”

“The more you speak the more I want to punch you.”

“That’s not nice,” Donghyuck pointed out. “Choose love, not violence. Kiss me instead.”

Renjun faked a gag. 

“You act as if you can’t get enough of me,” Donghyuck teased, leaning his face closer and closer. “Kissing me as soon as I get back. You’re so cute, Renjunnie.”

“Shut up.”

“Make me.”

Knowing that Donghyuck was expecting a kiss, Renjun instead put an end to Donghyuck’s blabbering with a hand over the younger man’s mouth. Donghyuck’s eyes widened, baffled and wounded. He complained, the words muffled against the soft palm of Renjun’s hand, only made clearer when Donghyuck opted to swipe his tongue over the flat surface, causing Renjun to recoil in disgust. 

“Eww.”

“Rude. This is the same tongue that kisses you!”

“Again: eww.”

Donghyuck scoffed. However, before he could say or do anything, Renjun’s phone vibrated. Once, then twice, and by the third message, it was obvious who it was. 

They didn’t even have to check, both men painfully aware as to who would be texting Renjun at this time of day. It wasn’t as if Mark hadn't been keeping in touch, however, every time he messaged or called Renjun it soured the mood. It was a harsh wake up call, yanking the two men out of the blissful and light cocoon they were in, forcing them back into reality.

Renjun’s smile faltered, his eyes following the noise until they landed on his discarded phone. 

Another message.

“You should answer,” Donghyuck said, an awkward strain in his voice. 

Renjun looked up at him, a sign of hurt flashing behind his eyes. Betrayal, perhaps.

But what was Donghyuck supposed to say? If Renjun didn’t respond then Mark would reach out to him instead, questioning if everything was fine. It happened before and Donghyuck had to lie, saying that Renjun went to sleep early when in fact he was right next to Donghyuck, waiting for him to end the call so that they could get back to their makeout session. 

And yet another text.

“He seems chatty today.”

The attempt at a joke was met with an annoyed sigh from Renjun. The older man went to grab his phone, reading through the texts sent by Mark.

“Anything important?”

“No,” Renjun replied. “Just the usual I miss yous. Nothing important.” With that, he typed out a quick response and put his phone down. The air between them felt thick, stifled by the ghost of Mark. “I’m gonna wash up.”

“Yeah. Cool.”

Renjun made his way towards the bedroom. By the time he would be done, things would be back to normal between them. Still, Donghyuck couldn’t help but feel uneasy. He pulled out his own phone, counting down the seconds until Mark texted him. 

It didn’t take long at all.

Mark

Hey

Is everything fine with Renjun?

Donghyuck

Not that I know of

He’s gone to take a shower so he’s probably ready to go to bed

Mark

Ah

Yeah

Makes sense

Sorry

Have a goodnight!

Donghyuck

Yeah

You too

Donghyuck looked at the two mugs left on the counter. He sighed, picking both of them up and taking them to the bedroom. Renjun was in the bathroom, the shower running, and instead of intruding, Donghyuck placed the mugs down on their bedside tables, ready for when Renjun stepped out. 

Mark really did have impeccable timing. Not that Donghyuck could entirely blame him for trying to talk to his own boyfriend, though he also would have preferred it if Mark got consumed with work and didn’t reach out at all. Donghyuck was selfish and he knew as much. Every time Mark reached out, he did so at the worst time, somehow sensing that Renjun and Donghyuck were in the middle of something, happy to be together. He just had to ruin the moment, reminding them of his existence. 

Donghyuck groaned, taking his place in bed, checking his alarm for tomorrow morning was still set. He made sure to give himself enough time for his much needed Renjun wake-up session (aka kissing him all over). Maybe ten extra minutes would do him some good too. 

After getting his alarms set up, Donghyuck checked his calendar, hovering over Friday. 

He made a reservation for them in advance - basically as soon as Renjun suggested that they go to that restaurant together. Renjun watched over his shoulder as he did so, a soft, shy smile across his lips. Donghyuck would head out there as soon as he got off work, meeting up with Renjun as soon as he possibly could. 

He wanted it to be special. He wanted to show Renjun just how much he cared for him - how he would always make the time for him, and how if he made a promise, he would keep it. 

By now it wasn’t hard to put the pieces together, seeing just how fed up and hurt Renjun was by constantly getting his hopes high, only for them to get crushed time and time again. 

Yet that didn’t explain to Donghyuck why exactly Renjun put up with it; clearly he was hurt, and clearly Mark was too preoccupied with work to make the time for Renjun, so why did Renjun stay with him? Why did he put up with being treated like an after-thought?

Did Mark even realise?

Knowing him, he probably didn’t. That was probably the worst part. 

After around ten more minutes, Renjun stepped out of the bathroom. He only had shorts on, revealing his slender chest, skin smooth and damp from the shower. The balls of his shoulders were a peachy pink, enticing Donghyuck to bite into the flesh, curious if they were just as sweet as he imagined. Donghyuck watched him pad across the room before he made his way over to the bed. 

It wasn’t late by any means and they could have fit in at least a movie or two before they realistically needed to go to bed, however Mark’s intrusion certainly soured the mood enough for Renjun to want to retire for the night. 

He slipped under the covers, propping a pillow up against the headrest so that he could sit up for a bit, either with the company of a book or something on his phone or tablet. He wore a complicated expression - somewhere in the ballpark of annoyance, agitation, and a palpable sadness which overpowered everything else. 

Donghyuck didn’t know if he was to blame. 

He didn’t say anything, the tension in the air too thick to navigate through just yet. However, when Renjun spotted the mug of tea on his bedside table, a soft smile thawed the ice, calming the air between them. He picked the mug up, taking a sip.

“Thanks,” Renjun offered.

“It’s nothing,” Donghyuck assured. 

The older man hummed, nursing his tea in silence. 

Donghyuck barely touched his, not feeling in the mood for it. 

“Did he text you too?” Renjun asked.

“Yeah. He wanted to see if you’re fine. You didn’t say much to him, did you?”

Renjun shrugged. “Not much to say, is there?”

“Yeah… Still, he sounded worried.”

“And?” Renjun turned to look at Donghyuck. He was completely unreadable to Donghyuck at that moment. 

There was anger, irritation bubbling just beneath the surface. But there was that same sadness which Donghyuck noticed before. He didn’t know what to make of it. 

“Do you want me to go to him? Tell him I’m perfectly fine and that I totally don’t mind that he only reaches out when he remembers about me every few days?”

“That’s-”

“You sound like you really want the best for Mark and I. That’s so sweet of you.”

“Oh come on! I’m just saying-”

“What? You’re saying what?”

Donghyuck opened his mouth, ready to argue, only for all his words to fall flat. He was stuck playing both sides despite everything. So he could only avoid the topic. “What’s gotten you in such a pissy mood anyway?”

Renjun scoffed. “Oh don’t act like you don’t know.”

“I don’t. One second you’re fine, and the next you’re annoyed by everything.”

“Well maybe you’re just fucking blind.”

“Maybe! What do you want me to say?”

“You know what,” Renjun said, sounding like he was holding back tears. 

But he wouldn’t say it either. As it stood, they were both too scared to say exactly what was hanging in the air between them. And neither of them would speak up first. The silence crushed Renjun. He bit down on his cheek, eyes glossing over when all Donghyuck could do was sit, stumped and quiet. 

“Leave,” Renjun said. 

“What-”

“Just go,” the older man continued, rolling over onto his side. “Go.”

And maybe if he was better - if he was braver - Donghyuck would have stayed and talked it out. Maybe he would have said exactly what Renjun wanted to hear from him. But he was far from brave. Reckless and stupid, yes, but not brave. Never brave. 

So he did as instructed, getting out of bed and taking his things. He walked over to the doorway, giving Renjun one last look before he made his way out and towards the guest bedroom. It felt colder than he expected it to. 

The white walls were depressing, and the bed wasn’t as comfortable as the one he shared with Renjun. It was a sterile, lifeless environment, sucking out whatever shred of joy he still had left within him. Once more, Donghyuck was nothing more than a guest occupying Renjun’s living space. All because he couldn’t speak up. 

In a way, it was funny. All of this happened because Donghyuck couldn’t speak up in the first place - because he couldn’t tell Renjun how he really felt, keeping it in until it was too late. 

Was it too late again?

He hoped not.

Donghyuck considered storming right back into Renjun’s bedroom, but he knew that the words would only get lodged in his throat once again. Three simple words he was too scared to utter aloud. He wanted to finally get them off his chest, but each time he was stopped by something he just couldn’t push aside. 

First, it was the fear of humiliation and heartache. Next, it became the crushing reality that Renjun chose someone else. And now, it was a putrid mixture of both. 

He sighed, getting in a bed which was far too cold and large for just him. But he did this to himself.

Still, he held out hope that by the time morning came, he would be able to patch things up with Renjun. 

He held onto that glimmer of hope as he tried to fall asleep, failing miserably, the minutes slowly ticking by. When he checked his phone, an hour had already passed and he was nowhere closer to falling asleep. 

He missed Renjun by his side. He missed his warmth and the weight of his body. He missed the steady rise and fall of his chest in his sleep, tranquil and calm. They had only been sharing a bed for a bit over two weeks now, but it already became a fragment of his routine that Donghyuck couldn’t do without. 

He tossed and turned, his heart split across the apartment. 

And when he thought all was lost, Donghyuck heard a soft pad of feet across the floor. It grew nearer until it was right by the door. Renjun paused, looking at Donghyuck’s frame beneath the covers, waiting for a sign. Donghyuck turned around, facing the older man, their eyes meeting in the darkness of the apartment. They didn’t say anything, but they didn’t have to.

Renjun made his way towards the bed, slipping under the covers and finding his place by Donghyuck’s side. 

The younger man wrapped his arms around him, pulling him as close as he could. Perhaps he couldn’t say the things he wanted to say, but he could show Renjun the truth of his heart. He pressed their foreheads together, dark eyes locked on each other, their breaths steady in the minimal space between them. 

“I’m sorry,” Renjun uttered softly.

“It’s fine,” Donghyuck assured. “I’m sorry too.”

That was the best they could do for now.

♡♡♡

They were fine in the morning. As fine as they could be.

Thankfully, Mark didn’t text Renjun again, placated by Donghyuck who had reached out first. 

After the mess that Mark’s texts caused, Donghyuck took the initiative to message his best friend first so that he wouldn’t feel obligated to reach out to Renjun on Donghyuck later on. He made up some bullshit about Renjun working or going out with friends, and said that he was drained from all the thrills, hence his reluctance to talk to Mark as often. That seemed to do the trick, because Mark didn’t interrupt them once throughout the day. 

And then, once Friday finally came, Donghyuck and Renjun were once more in a state of complete, oblivious bliss. 

Donghyuck spent some extra time in the morning getting ready. He packed a change of clothes in his bag, opting to change after work. He was careful when folding his clothes, not wanting to end up wearing a crinkled shirt to what was basically a date with Renjun. 

Renjun watched him in the morning, amused by how much effort Donghyuck was putting into his appearance even though it was obvious he would end up looking like a mess after a full day of dealing with a bunch of kids. 

“I still can’t believe you work at a daycare,” Renjun mused as Donghyuck was trying to get his hair to sit neatly in place. 

“What can I say: I’m great with kids.”

“Probably because you have so much in common.”

“Haha, very funny,” Donghyuck retorted. “Would you say the same about Jaemin?”

Renjun shrugged. “I don’t think so. He seems more put together.”

“So you’re just saying I’m a hot mess?”

“I wouldn’t say hot.”

Donghyuck scoffed. “Why do I even bother?” 

The older man laughed, stepping towards Donghyuck, standing behind him. He propped his head on Donghyuck’s shoulder, looking at their reflection in the mirror. “You’re more handsome than hot,” Renjun argued, stroking his hands up Donghyuck’s arms. “With a dash of pretty, too.”

“Is that your type?”

Renjun hummed. “Yeah, you’re just my type.”

What a great way to boost Donghyuck’s ego.

Donghyuck looked over to his shoulder, glancing down at Renjun. He waited for Renjun to glance up at him too, smiling as he did so. When Renjun’s attention was on him, he closed the distance between them, sealing the moment with a kiss. 

“You’re just my type, too. One of a kind.”

“Keep talking like that and you’ll be late for work.”

“Don’t tempt me.”

Renjun laughed, pulling away. “Alright, I won’t. I’ll see you after work, right?”

“As soon as possible.”

“Good. Have fun today.”

“Since you told me to.”

♡♡♡

Donghyuck rushed to catch the earlier tram, shoving himself inside without a care for how many feet he had to trample on in the process. He received quite a few annoyed glares as he pushed himself inside, but quite frankly he couldn’t care any less if it meant getting to Renjun faster. 

He would save a solid ten minutes like this, so he could handle some disgruntled murmurs aimed at him. 

As soon as he had the chance, Donghyuck got changed at work and ran off. He promised to cover for Jaemin on another occasion since he dipped a bit earlier. Jaemin didn’t really ask why he was in such a rush though Donghyuck was certain he would bring it up at a later date - most likely Monday. 

Not that Donghyuck would give him all the details. 

He changed to the spare clothes he packed. Thankfully the shirt didn’t crease and his hair was fixable, his appearance relatively put together given he had a day’s work behind him. Hopefully Renjun would find him charming even if he was slightly disheveled. 

Renjun sent him a text to make him aware he was heading out as well. Maybe Donghyuck had a chance of getting there before him. Surely that would be a pleasant surprise to the older man, not having to wait around for Donghyuck, wondering if he would even show up. But he would most definitely show up, wanting nothing more than to take Renjun out on a proper date. 

This was a place he suggested as well, so he was determined to make the night perfect. He would make this the best date Renjun had ever been on.

As soon as he made it to his stop, Donghyuck hurried out and followed the maps on his phone to reach the spot.

He made it before Renjun.

The older man was still about five minutes away which gave Donghyuck enough time to catch his breath and make an attempt at pulling himself together. Honestly, there was no reason to run all the way here, but Donghyuck knew that he had to be there first. He knew he had to be the one waiting - not the other way around.

And once Renjun made his way over, the look on his face made it all worth it. He seemed surprised to see Donghyuck already waiting for him, eyes lighting up, a warm smile spreading across his face, reaching from ear to ear. 

With the distance between them, Renjun ended up picking up his pace, walking over with a noticeable pep in his step. It was beyond adorable and it caused Donghyuck’s heart to leap forward, threatening to jump out of his ribcage. 

“You’re early,” Renjun said once he made his way over to Donghyuck.

“Or are you just late?”

At that, Renjun rolled his eyes, an airy and amused laugh passing through his parted lips. “How long did I make you wait?”

“A painful five minutes,” Donghyuck replied. “You’ll need to make it up to me. Think you can do that?”

“I’ll see.”

Not wasting any more time, the two men made their way inside. Donghyuck gave his name for the reservation, led by the waiter to a table already set out and waiting for them. 

The restaurant was moody, dim lights and dark, earthy colours. The candle on the table offered some soft light, illuminating Renjun’s face in a tender orange hue, making him look gentler and younger. The image stole the air from Donghyuck’s lungs, seeing a vision of the man he fell in love with all those years ago.

Confused, Renjun tilted his head to the side, wondering why Donghyuck was looking at him like that, breathless and weak. When Donghyuck still didn’t say anything, Renjun gave the younger man a light kick under the table to see if he could snap Donghyuck out of his daze.

“Ah- Sorry.”

“What was that about?”

“Oh it’s…” Donghyuck swallowed the lump in his throat, feeling awkward now that he was allowing his genuine feelings to come out to the surface. “You’re beautiful.” He said it with utmost sincerity, not playing it up for laughs. He simply said it as it was, meaning it to the fullest. No joking, no teasing, and no hiding. 

Not expecting Donghyuck to be so bold, Renjun blushed visibly even under the dulled lights. It somehow made him look even more ethereal in Donghyuck’s eyes, the rosy pink dusting his cheeks beyond charming. 

Renjun cleared his throat, unable to force his smile down no matter how hard he tried to play it cool. He opted to give Donghyuck another playful kick under the table only for Donghyuck to trap his foot in between his legs, watching with glee as Renjun’s face filled with even more colour. 

In that moment, Donghyuck felt twenty again. He felt like anything was possible, and he felt like he had a chance with the beauty sitting opposite him. They were both giddy idiots, skirting around what they both truly wanted. And tonight, once their date was over, Donghyuck would be the one to take Renjun home - something which his younger self was incapable of doing.

“You’re in a good mood,” Renjun mused, not trying to pull his trapped leg away. Instead, he opted to tease Donghyuck with it instead, stroking along Donghyuck’s clothed calves as he wore an innocent smile. 

“What can I say: you just have that effect on me, Renjunnie.”

The older man chuckled, looking away once more, shy in a way Donghyuck had yet to see from him. 

Although…

It wasn’t that new. In fact, if Donghyuck allowed himself to reminisce, he could see them like this years ago. He saw them during the years where nobody dared to make a move. The years where Donghyuck stuck around Renjun and annoyed the life out of him just to see him smile and laugh. He took him out then too, but he foolishly never called it a date. And then it was too late. 

Right now, they were picking up from the moment Donghyuck had his chance but didn’t take it. They were right back to eight years ago, knowing now how things would play out if neither of them plucked up the courage to ask for more. 

When the waiter came around, Renjun asked for the drinks and dessert menu, skipping out on everything else. It was what they were here for in the first place.

Renjun picked out a wine for them and then made the executive decision on the desserts they should try. 

“And do I get a choice?” Donghyuck asked after Renjun listed out what he was going to order.

“Of course: would you prefer the chocolate souffle or the pistachio tiramisu?”

Donghyuck clicked his tongue, looking at the menu set out in front of them. “I’d actually like the cheesecake.”

“Really?”

“Oh sue me for being basic.”

Still, Renjun gave in and swapped out the tiramisu for the cheesecake. After all, since they skipped out on having actual food, they could probably order another round of desserts anyway. 

They took their time with the sweet treats, taking scoops of each other’s orders to have a quick taste. And whilst they took their time with the food, the same couldn’t be said about the drinks. One glass turned into two, both men pleasantly buzzed and warm. 

The wine worked wonders to loosen them up, the atmosphere of the restaurant making them feel like they were the only people around, locked in their intimate bubble. 

“Can I be honest?” Renjun asked, his souffle nearly gone. 

“Only if you’re nice about it.”

Renjun chuckled, shaking his head. “I don’t know if that’s possible.”

“Then don’t talk. Simple as.”

The older man snorted, his foot brushing up against Donghyuck’s under the table. “I think I’ll talk anyway.”

“Not like I can stop you, can I?”

Renjun shook his head, a shit eating grin across his face. “You know, you irritated me so much when we first met,” he confessed, taking things to a place Donghyuck wasn’t sure he was ready to go just yet. He probably needed another glass of wine before that. “Like… I would see your face and get the urge to just strangle you.”

“Wow.”

“But then I- then I kind of understood you better,” Renjun continued. “I realised that that’s how you show affection - maybe because you’re too embarrassed to be genuine about it or something like that.”

“Or something like that,” Donghyuck echoed, feeling as if that was the best explanation either of them were ever going to get. “Then I guess I’ll be honest too and admit that I- I thought you hated my guts,” he added, scratching the back of his neck as he did so. “Or at least… I thought you really found me annoying. Like, you put up with me but- I didn’t think you’d… you’d ever want anything more.” 

He was too much. Donghyuck knew that very well, and as much as he loved to rile Renjun up, he was also worried that one day he would take it too far - annoy Renjun too much - and everything would fall apart. 

“You-” Renjun stopped himself, words lost at the tip of his tongue. 

All he could do was look at Donghyuck, the fragile admission weighing them both down, crushing them to a pulp. There they were, nearly a decade in, and only now did the reason for the hesitation come into light. All this time, Donghyuck had been far too scared, constantly walking the edge. 

“Seriously?”

Embarrassed and remorseful, Donghyuck nodded, glancing down at his plate, only a bite sized piece left. “Seriously.”

Leaning back in his seat, Renjun’s lips curved into a strange, strained smile. The type that was painted on and forced in place, all whilst his eyes gave away the turmoil within his heart. “But I… I liked that. I still like it,” he stated, his words hushed like a secret meant only for their ears.”It’s… That’s our thing.”

Donghyuck chuckled, nodding in agreement. “Yeah. I guess it is. But you know… I never knew if it was just a bit or if- well, if you really didn’t mind. If you really liked… me.”

Hearing that, Renjun only lasted so long before something visibly snapped inside him. Donghyuck couldn’t exactly pin-point what exactly happened, but he saw an undeniable shift in the older man. 

A bitterness behind his eyes - a sadness which no amount of humour could wash away. It lingered, permeating deep into his soul, consuming him from within. And instead of crying like Donghyuck expected, Renjun laughed. 

He laughed, though there was no glee to be found in the noise whatsoever. It was a void, deep and dark, his heart shattered and sucked into the unrelenting pull of its gravity.

The laughter fizzled out, left with a weak, flat exhale. 

Donghyuck saw the tears in his eyes then.

“I’m stupid,” Renjun said, lips pulled into a thin smile as he dabbed the wetness from his eyes with a napkin. “So stupid.”

“Hey…” Donghyuck reached out for his hand, holding it in the centre of the table, offering it a light and reassuring squeeze. “Only I’m allowed to say that.”

The comment did what Donghyuck hoped it would, bringing some sincerity to the stretch of Renjun’s mouth. It warmed his expression, setting aside the sombre regret lingering around him. 

“You’re not allowed to say that,” Renjun argued. “But I- I always liked you,” he added with far more conviction Donghyuck was ready for. “I really was bad at showing that, wasn’t I?”

Truthfully, Donghyuck didn’t know. Who was more to blame? Donghyuck and his refusal to make a move, or Renjun and his own hesitance to speak his mind? At least with Renjun, it could have been seen as a genuine game - hard to get and easy to want. He was waiting, playing along with their bit, only for Donghyuck to never follow through in a way that truly mattered. 

So maybe it was Donghyuck all along.

He was the stupid one. 

“Or I was just too blind.”

Renjun chuckled, looking down at their joined hands, a pleased glint flashing behind his eyes as if he quite liked the sight. He flipped his hand over, letting Donghyuck stroke the inside of his palm. He didn’t say anything else - no confirmation nor argument - simply allowing the moment to linger between them in a shared understanding. 

Yet Donghyuck didn’t want it to consume the entire evening either. 

He tapped his index finger over Renjun’s palm, playful and light, finding a rhythm that the older man might recognise if he paid enough attention. A song they both knew - their go-to song whenever they went out for karaoke along with their friends. They always had to sing it together, putting up an act for their friends who found it hilarious - especially multiple drinks in. Even Mark laughed along, oblivious to the fact Donghyuck sang his heart out for Renjun every single time.

Renjun snorted once he realised, tapping his foot along. “Really?”

“Really,” Donghyuck replied. “We should go out for karaoke.”

“Just us?”

“Just us.”

“That would be a long night,” Renjun pointed out. 

“But it would be fun. Or are you scared you wouldn’t be able to keep up with me?”

“Honestly, yes. You’re terrifying when you get in the groove,” Renjun stated. “And your song choices are abysmal.”

“No they’re not. You just lack the distinguished taste I have.”

“That’s one way to put it.”

“Hey! At least it’s not trot.”

Renjun chuckled. “I like trot. It’s fun when Jaemin sings it.”

Donghyuck rolled his eyes, thankful for the change in conversation. With the ball rolling, he and Renjun spent the next hour talking their ears off with glasses of wine coming in after the other. 

They ordered another round of desserts to Renjun’s liking, liking off their spoons with satisfied hums. They could have continued for the rest of the night just like that, both men pleased by the company and good atmosphere. But unfortunately they had to call an end sooner than later.

Both pleasantly buzzed, they waited around for their taxi. The night was pleasantly warm, though that didn’t stop the pair from sticking to each other as closely as possible. 

Renjun kept the conversation going as they stood around, a light and giddy giggle mixed into his words. It warmed Donghyuck right up, his heart throwing itself around in elation. He couldn’t get enough of the sound, wishing to soak it all up - to feel it in his own chest, kissing every bubbly laughter from Renjun’s sweet lips. But for now, he could only hold Renjun, arms looped around him with the intention of never letting go.

He touched him even during the taxi ride home, knees bumping the whole way. And the nearer they got back to the apartment, the contact became less lighthearted, instead brimming with intent. 

Brief glances, coy smiles, and an understanding of what would happen next as soon as they stepped out of the car. The air thrummed in Donghyuck’s ears, his heartbeat lodged in his throat with anticipation. It wasn’t as if he hadn’t felt Renjun against him; he knew how he tasted now, and he had drawn out the most divine sounds out of him already, but it was different this time around. 

This time, instead of a heated affair he was met with something far more tender and real, even if their circumstances hadn’t changed in the slightest. 

After all, this was still nothing more than a scandalous rendezvous behind Mark’s back, running victory laps around a man who was completely oblivious to the situation. But with this… With this, Donghyuck felt it deep in his heart - down to the very core of his being. It was the knowledge that it was more to both of them. It was a successful date, sweetened still by the desires of not only their hearts but also their bodies. 

When they arrived, the air was thick like molasses. Sweet and indulgent, far too much to handle. Every single step they took towards the elevator was painful, having to cut through the wall of want. And once they got inside and the doors finally shut close, all semblance of control was lost.

It was Renjun who made the first move, slamming Donghyuck against the wall with the intensity of his kiss. He wasn’t gentle in the slightest, all hot want and devouring hunger. 

His kiss could barely be counted as one, far too unrestrained to be anything more of a plea for Donghyuck to fuck his mouth, panting and ready for him. And Donghyuck would be a fool to refuse him in any capacity. He lurched forward into the kiss, licking his tongue into Renjun’s mouth with no restraint, the sopping heat welcoming him right home. 

He tasted like sugar, far too sweet and addictive. Donghyuck couldn’t pull away from him, taking Renjun’s waist in his hands and yanking him closer all whilst Renjun’s hands roamed all across his chest, cursing all the buttons which prevented him from feeling all of Donghyuck underneath. Donghyuck slipped his thigh in between Renjun’s legs, hearing the older man mewl into their exchange as Donghyuck rubbed against his crotch. The heat of the contact was infernal, burning away Donghyuck’s inhibitions one by one. 

He dropped his hands down to Renjun’s ass, pulling him closer so that Renjun would grind against him. When he did, Renjun moaned - the noise reverberating inside the small confined space of the elevator. Pleased by the friction, Renjun swayed his hips on his own, rubbing himself against Donghyuck as if he was in heat, desperate to be fucked within an inch of his life. 

And all whilst his hips were moving, he kept uttering Donghyuck’s name - the two syllables slurred with a giddy lust. That alone did it for Donghyuck, weak to Renjun in ways the older man would probably relentlessly tease him for if he ever found out.

The floors kept going up and up, thankfully uninterrupted in their ascent. And finally, once they reached their floor and the doors opened, Renjun pulled himself away with the willpower of gods. He wrapped his hand around Donghyuck’s wrist and led him forward, all whilst wearing the most tempting smile Donghyuck could ever hope to witness. 

Lips glossy with spit, eyes blown out, cheeks a gorgeous pink, Renjun was the image of sin itself. A siren luring its hapless victim off the ship, and Donghyuck was more than willing to plunge in the arctic waters for him.

They navigated the corridor to the room, stumbling like lovesick fools, pulling each other into another kiss. They couldn’t bear to be apart for a split second, coming together like pieces of a puzzle, yearning to be one and whole. 

At the door to the apartment, Donghyuck pushed Renjun against the hard surface. The wait was killing him and he couldn’t contain his desire for Renjun long enough to make it through the door. He kissed him, hot and heady, pressing Renjun up against the door with no room for escape. He slid a hand down Renjun’s waist and his thigh, forcing the older man’s leg up around his waist. And Renjun let him, hips rocking, cock already half hard in his pants. 

Renjun only had a moment of clarity when he heard the elevator ding as it went down, realising that they were still out in the open. His lips curved into an amused smile, laughing into the kiss. “My bag,” he uttered, the words muffled against Donghyuck’s passionate kiss. “The keys.”

Donghyuck understood, snaking his unoccupied hand over to the small bag barely keeping itself up on Renjun’s shoulder. He unzipped it and dug around until he found the outline of the keycard to the doors. With it secured, he tapped it against the reader a few times until it finally registered and unlocked the doors.

As soon as they were inside, Renjun yanked him forward, desperate and unrelenting. Donghyuck laughed, low and dark, following along with Renjun’s whims. He allowed Renjun to pull him forward, ravenous hands touching whatever they could, stripping each other bare with every step they took towards the bedroom. 

Donghyuck’s shirt was tossed somewhere in the corridor and his pants weren’t far behind with how fast Renjun was to undo his belt and pull his zipper down. And of course, Donghyuck wasn’t going to let Renjun have all the fun, caring very little about how expensive the shirt the older man wore was, treating it with the same due diligence as Renjun did to his own.

A trail of clothes was left along their path, both men stumbling and laughing into their kiss, bodies set ablaze within the sterile chill of the apartment. 

The second they breached the threshold of the bedroom, Renjun flipped them around and pushed Donghyuck back. The younger man made contact with the bed. He was dizzy, an expression of hazy lust written all across his face, barely able to stand straight. All he needed was one gentle breeze to knock him off his feet and Renjun knew that. 

Renjun took one look at Donghyuck before he yanked his own pants down, kicking them off, no barriers left between them. “Off,” he said with no patience left in him.

Donghyuck laughed, struggling to strip with how easily he kept losing his balance. However, once he was completely naked, Renjun took the next step. He closed the gap between them, a hand on Donghyuck’s sternum pushing him down until he was sat at the edge of the bed. Renjun crawled over him, finding his rightful place on Donghyuck’s lap, ass grinding over Donghyuck’s hardened cock.

“Fuck,” Donghyuck groaned, mind spinning from the heavenly friction. And when Renjun continued, working Donghyuck up with his ass alone, Donghyuck saw stars welling behind his eyes. He was weak, a shiver running down his spine, body tingling with bliss. He was at Renjun’s mercy and he wouldn’t have it any other way. 

Legs straddling Donghyuck, Renjun took the reins, urging Donghyuck to lie down. With his back flush against the mattress, Donghyuck saw Renjun unlike ever before, laid down beneath him, looking up at the object of his affections - his god, meant to be worshipped and cherished, revered with all the grace and care in the world. 

But his god was nothing but a sweet, tempting succubus; devious and deceivingly soft in appearance, yet unrelenting beneath the surface. 

Renjun followed Donghyuck down, seeking his lips to steal the life out of Donghyuck. And Donghyuck, ever the fool, was more than happy to let Renjun have all of him. 

His wanting hands found their place on Renjun’s slender waist, stroking up and down in tempo to the tantalising rock of Renjun’s hips over him. Donghyuck’s erection rubbed sinfully against the crack of Renjun’s cheeks, his trickling precum smeared all over their union. Every brush against him sent a spark down his spine, senses set alight. He felt it at his fingertips and on his tongue, desperate as he met Renjun’s kiss fervently. 

When it still didn’t feel like enough, Donghyuck’s hands spread across Renjun’s back, pushing him down until they were chest to chest. It wasn’t practical, but by god did Donghyuck need it. He needed to feel Renjun’s rapid heartbeat against his own, the adrenaline spike driving them both delirious. The rhythm matched his own, a constant pounding which only wanted one thing and one thing only. 

But kissing and grinding against each other was only ever going to get them so far. Reluctantly, Renjun pulled himself up, hands splayed against Donghyuck’s chest. Any attempt to pull him back down was met with unwavering resistance. It infuriated Donghyuck but it also made his stomach flip with immense arousal. 

God, he wanted Renjun right now. And by god did he find him sexy like this - firm and bossy. It would only make it all the more fun once Renjun lost control, moaning and crying from Donghyuck’s cock. 

Ever the tease, Renjun decided to torture Donghyuck some more. With his hands firmly planted over Donghyuck’s chest for leverage, Renjun rolled his hips in alluring circles, grinding over the younger man’s erection as his own cock leaked from his alluring pink tip. He tipped his head back, getting lost in the pleasure of the build-up. 

Donghyuck was salivating at the sight, fighting for his life to not just yank Renjun down and flip him over, fucking him over the edge of the bed like he wanted. Instead, he soaked in the sheer eroticism of it all - the wait which would make it all worth it. He gripped onto Renjun’s thighs, the flesh giving under the pressure. 

It was the show of a lifetime. A show meant just for his eyes. How could he possibly rush this?

As he swayed along to his own tempo, Renjun leaned further back, dragging his hands down Donghyuck’s torso. The touch was simultaneously firm and light as a feather, the mixture of sensations causing the man beneath to shudder. 

Renjun arched his back, running one hand further along his own body, stroking past his chest up to the delectable line of his throat until his fingers finally reached his lips.

Donghyuck gulped, watching intently as Renjun slipped the digits past the soft cushions of his lips, lapping his tongue over the fingers until they were nice and slick with his spit. He pulled them out slowly, letting Donghyuck see the wetness stringing between his digits, clear and sweet as sin. 

It wouldn’t be enough, but that didn’t matter right now. The only thing that mattered was the way Renjun reached behind himself, brow scrunching when he slipped a digit past his furrowed pucker. 

“Do you- want to know a secret?”

Tongue heavy as lead in his mouth, Donghyuck could only nod and hum in response. He gripped hard on Renjun’s thigh, knuckles white with restraint. It would definitely bruise. A sign of Donghyuck on Renjun’s delicate flesh. 

“I had a-” Renjun gasped, slipping his finger all the way in. “A whole day to get ready.”

It took a few seconds to process, but when Donghyuck understood, he felt the world tipping back. “Oh sweet Jesus.” The words were somewhere along a whine and a groan, the earth beneath his feet suddenly disappearing. 

This was different than when Renjun let him slip inside after getting himself off over the phone with Mark. It was different than when Donghyuck fucked him again, Renjun still remembering his shape. It was completely different, because Renjun did this for him with the intent of sleeping with him. 

A show just for his enjoyment.

“Did it in the shower,” Renjun continued, his words coming out slightly slurred as he had to focus on not getting lost in the pleasure of his fingers spreading him open. “For you.”

“Oh baby…”

“But my- my fingers are short,” Renjun said with a faint, airy laughter. “Not as good as your dick.”

Donghyuck was about to pass out, all the blood in his body rushing right down to his aching cock. 

Satisfied with Donghyuck’s reactions, Renjun had the audacity to smirk all whilst he fingered himself open. He had to be the devil - there was no other explanation. How else could he torture Donghyuck and wear a smile at the same time?

“I thought that maybe- maybe if the date was terrible, it wouldn’t matter,” Renjun said, his mouth taking the shape of a small ‘o’ when he reached as deep as he could on his own, stroking up against his walls in the moment of silence which followed. He waited before letting out a humoured exhale. “But you don’t disappoint. I didn’t even have to wait for you.” 

Unlike someone. 

Renjun laughed, airy and strained, his chest tight with arousal. “Is it sad that I- I could’ve fucked you just for that? Maybe. Who cares anyway?” With that, Renjun pulled his fingers out of his ass, whining at the loss. 

Empty, he frowned, sitting himself upright on Donghyuck’s lap. He looked over towards the bedside table, straining himself to reach over and rummage through the top drawer. Their bodies disconnected for a few seconds - seconds which felt far too long and cruel, cold and wrong. Thankfully it didn’t last long, because as soon as he was gone, he returned to his rightful place - this time with a bottle of lube in hand.

Not new. Half empty. 

Mark’s side of the bed. 

Not that it mattered. He was about to fill his shoes anyway.

“I’ll give you a choice,” Renjun declared. “You can finish the job, or we can jump straight to the fun part?”

Donghyuck really was about to pass out. 

“Five… four… three.. two…”

“I wanna fuck you.”

Renjun snorted. “You’re honest; I’ll give you that. But you’re in luck, because I don’t want to wait any longer.”

With that, the choice was made. 

Renjun poured out some lube into the palm of his hands, rubbing it to warm it up before he once more reached behind him. However, this time around he had a different goal in mind. 

He wrapped his hand around Donghyuck’s throbbing cock, grinning at the way it practically perked up from the single touch. He started rubbing slowly from the tip, dragging the lube and precum down over the length before offering a few more tentative strokes, enjoying the way Donghyuck shivered beneath him, nails digging hard into his thighs. 

Still, he did manage to find a shred of mercy in himself because after a few more unnecessary strokes, Renjun lifted his hips and guided Donghyuck’s cock over to his expectant entrance. The heat alone made Donghyuck feel weak, glad that he was laid out on the bed for this one. 

Renjun looked over his shoulder, angling his hips just right to finally welcome Donghyuck inside. The younger man’s tip rubbed over his rim, the fat cockhead leaking with excitement, hungry to pillage and devour completely. Positioned and ready, Renjun sank down on him, taking Donghyuck inch by inch.

At first, he was composed, adjusted to the stretch. However, as soon as he breached past what his fingers could prepare him for, Renjun’s breathing became laboured, his expression pinched in an enticing symphony of ache and euphoria. His hips stuttered over the last inch, needing a moment longer to get accustomed to it at this angle. Despite his own overwhelming agony and need to fuck Renjun stupid, Donghyuck offered the older man comfort, squeezing his thighs and massaging them to ease the strain.

Finally, Renjun took all of Donghyuck in, gasping when he sat in Donghyuck’s lap. His chest heaved, breathing intense and rapid, the noises slipping out of him a mixture of high whines and whimpers which slowly morphed into wanton moans as he was left filled to the brim. 

Renjun supported himself up with his hands splayed over Donghyuck’s stomach. His body was taut, muscles tensed. 

Donghyuck wanted to fuck him loose and unrestrained. 

“You good, baby?” Donghyuck asked, not caring how thin his voice came out. He had Huang Renjun literally sitting on his cock right now - being flustered was a given!

The older man sucked in his lips and squeezed his eyes shut, his hips shifting ever so slightly to get more comfortable. He hummed, still needing a few more seconds. It was cute. Sexy too - very much so. 

“Yeah. Just- need a moment,” Renjun replied. “Haven’t done this in- in a while,” he admitted, causing Donghyuck’s stomach to do a series of increasingly more complex flips and somersaults. It must have somehow been visible because Renjun chuckled, relaxing where he was on Donghyuck’s lap. “He prefers missionary.”

“Oh fuck.”

Renjun laughed, the vibrations in his chest palpable around Donghyuck’s dick. He was losing his sanity with each passing second.

“Probably for the best,” the older man continued. “I don’t want to do all the work.”

Yet he insisted. He wouldn’t let Donghyuck move, putting them in the position they were in right now. 

What was Donghyuck supposed to do with that information but go crazy?

“It gets boring though,” Renjun said. “Only so many times I can say harder and faster before I get sick of it. It’s… fine. Dull, but fine.”

Donghyuck wanted to curse Mark out, but at the same time his incompetence worked in Donghyuck’s favour. Always a goodie two shoes, even in bed. Not that there was anything bad with missionary, but fuck did Renjun deserve to be flipped and tossed around every which way. 

“Fuck,” Renjun uttered, a smile spreading across his face. He clenched around Donghyuck, mouth parting. “Good. So good.”

“Yeah. So fucking good.” 

A severe understatement. 

Something about that must have been hilarious because it made Renjun laugh. Sweet, bubbly, angelic. 

And then he attacked.

Renjun lifted himself up - not by much, but enough to notice. And before Donghyuck could suck in the air to fill his lungs, Renjun dropped back down. 

It punched a moan out of Donghyuck, the impact making his toes curl. Renjun was still so fucking tight, walls sopping with lube and arousal. There was no way Donghyuck could be normal about this. 

One small movement turned into two, then three, and then Donghyuck lost count. 

Each time, Renjun grew more confident and sure in what he was doing. He raised himself up higher, his pucker dragging over Donghyuck’s throbbing cock at a maddening pace before he would sink right back down, taking him in whole with a satisfied moan. He became entranced, the movement of his hips a dance of its own. He rolled his head, smiling to himself as Donghyuck reached a long neglected spot within him. 

Donghyuck couldn’t hold back anymore. Renjun was used to it by now, and so, Donghyuck gripped onto his waist and offered him some help. 

He helped Renjun as he pushed up, and once he came crashing back down, Donghyuck forced him harder onto his length. Renjun moaned at the extra force, slamming down with a harsh slap of skin over skin. And then he did it again and again and again and-

Donghyuck fucked up into Renjun’s velvety heat, lube trickling out from the intensity and speed of their union. The older man was reduced to nothing more than a string of long, winding moans as he bounced on Donghyuck’s lap, fucked deeper and harder just like he wanted. Donghyuck didn’t need any goading and begging, taking care of Renjun in a way he so desperately craved. 

Nothing dull, and nothing boring. 

The strength in Renjun’s arms was slowly dissipating, each brutal thrust into his silky opening knocking more and more energy out of him until he was a shaking mess. Head hung low, thighs quivering with strain, Renjun did his best to keep fucking himself open on Donghyuck’s throbbing cock. Donghyuck couldn’t get enough of his expressions - the scorching lust and desperate want vivid in the crease of his brow and the parting of his lips. 

Renjun was born for this.

Donghyuck gave Renjun’s ass a firm squeeze, spreading the cheeks apart before letting them fall back into place, swallowing him up. The way Renjun rolled over him was hypnotising; all Donghyuck could focus on was him and his exquisite body - narrow frame, smooth skin, a waist meant to be held. 

He wanted to cherish just as much as he wanted to ravage and destroy, biting into the tender flesh, his mark eternally left on Renjun. 

Losing strength and his mind, Renjun started to lean forward, the shift in angle punching out a sharp gasp out of him, eyes wide as Donghyuck hit him just right. His hips stuttered from the onslaught of sensations, seeking the pleasure but avoiding the ache. In the end, he couldn’t resist the temptation and fucked himself right back down, Donghyuck’s girth rubbing over his prostate.

“Oh fuck,” Renjun moaned, his nails digging into Donghyuck’s chest. “Yes.”

“Right there?”

Renjun keened, biting down on his bottom lip.

“Then take it, baby. Show me how much you love it.”

With a high whine, Renjun rolled his hips again, arching his back to get the perfect angle. He kept repeating the same movement, mustering all the strength he had to bring himself close to the edge. Donghyuck could feel just how close he was by the way Renjun trembled - the way he clenched around him, begging for Donghyuck to join him, delirious with want. He wasn’t far off either, constantly holding himself from finally tipping over, waiting for Renjun.

And he was close. So close.

Renjun’s movements became frantic and messy. Paired with his ineligible moans and pleas, Donghyuck knew that he needed very little to finally reach his peak. And so, Donghyuck helped him out on the last stretch seeing as Renjun’s strength was completely sucked out of him, deep arousal seeping through his veins. 

Donghyuck firmly planted his feet on the floor and fucked up into Renjun, his grip vice-like over the older man’s waist, slamming him down with maddening force.

Renjun was pliant for him, taking everything Donghyuck gave without protest. He allowed himself to become completely at Donghyuck’s mercy, attaching his mouth to Donghyuck in a hot kiss. He moaned into his mouth, barely able to to anything more as he was continuously fucked into vigorously. But he wouldn’t have it any other way. Renjun took it all, smiling the closer he got to his peak. Sweet gasps and moans poured into Donghyuck’s mouth and he swallowed each one down for safe keeping.

Donghyuck was close too. Painfully so. Renjun was still so tight, the pressure around his cock driving him crazy. He fucked into him, the bucking of his hips getting more aggressive and desperate with each passing second.

All he needed was the final push.

And Renjun delivered right on time.

“Mine,” the older man uttered, body going taut as his climax sat just around the corner. “Mine,” he repeated, muscles flexing, stomach tight before his hips stuttered. “Mine,” he called one last time before he came in between their joined bodies, trembling from head to toe from the force of it. His moan dragged, muffled into the heat of Donghyuck’s mouth.

One simple word, yet it meant so much.

“Yours,” Donghyuck said desperately, Renjun’s luscious walls constricting around him. 

That was it. That was all he needed. He groaned, holding on tightly to Renjun, his high washing over him. He felt like he had been submerged under water, gasping for air before promptly resurfacing. He spilled out inside of Renjun, milking them both dry, their bodies seeking to draw out as much of the shared euphoria as possible. 

The single word echoed in his ears. 

Mine.

Yours.

His heart constricted, crushed by just how much he meant it. Crushed by the desire for Renjun to mean it too.

With a few more frenzied thrusts, they were both done. Renjun was filled to the brim with Donghyuck’s seed, the liquid trickling down from their union, fucked in and out of him. He collapsed over Donghyuck, shaking and laughing, bubbly and happy. 

He didn’t say anything, struggling to utter a single coherent thing. Instead, he buried his face against Donghyuck’s neck, leaving open mouthed kisses over the flushed skin.

As he recovered, Donghyuck stroked across Renjun’s back, fascinated by the curve of his spine. The joy he felt from being this close was met with a sadness just as strong. A sadness he didn’t show but one which would always be present.

All he could do was utter a hushed confession. “All yours, baby,” he said, faint and hoarse but honest. “Always have been.”

Always will be.

Renjun hummed, running his hand over Donghyuck’s chest to press it over Donghyuck’s heart. It stayed there until they both pulled apart, matching smiles and things left unsaid.

“That was… the best date I’ve been on,” Renjun admitted.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. We should do that again.” The older man sat himself back in Donghyuck’s lap, wincing at the dull ache in his back. He pulled up and slipped Donghyuck’s cock out, frowning as he clenched around the empty space. Donghyuck cooed at the sight, finding Renjun far too adorable and irresistible. “Oh shut it.”

“But you’re just so cute, Renjunnie! Makes me wanna fuck you again.”

Renjun rolled his eyes. “Not like this. My thighs burn.”

“Are you saying you want me to fuck you again?”

He didn’t respond, but his poor attempt and biting down a smile gave it all away.

“Oh Renjunnie, you don’t have to play coy with me,” Donghyuck said, holding onto Renjun’s hips. “We should celebrate our date, don’t you think? Say, what’s the most times you came in one night?”

“I- I don’t know?”

Donghyuck smirked. “Then, how many times do you think you can cum tonight?”

Flustered, Renjun pushed down on Donghyuck’s stomach. “I don’t know.”

“You wanna find out?”

♡♡♡

Five times. But who was counting anyway?

♡♡♡

The weekend was spent in what could only be called domestic bliss. Their date (and the night after) put them both in a great mood which seemingly nothing could ruin. Even when Mark texted or called, the atmosphere didn’t suddenly sour like before. Maybe because they didn’t pay much attention anyway. 

The apartment was stifling and Renjun had better plans than to sit around all day. Hence, the older man dragged Donghyuck out to get some fresh air. 

When Mark sent a message, he had the excuse of being busy and out and about, not needing to spare his boyfriend much time. And Mark was happy that Renjun was enjoying himself, not pushing further. Maybe if he asked, he would have realised Donghyuck was also with him - that he was with him constantly. But even then, it was unlikely he would have ever thought anything was going on between them. 

Something about ignorance and bliss.

Back at the apartment, the master bedroom was cleaned up and aired out after how much of a workout the two had partaken in earlier. Renjun changed the sheets, opting for a fresh set of bed covers; they were white with large yellow sunflowers, the colour matching the feature wall. It livened up the space, adding another personal touch to it. 

The bedside table on Mark’s side had now been occupied with Donghyuck’s things: his phone charger, his glasses and case, a bottle of water, and a small tube of moisturiser. That was probably the most use it had ever gotten.

And in a week, it would have to be cleared once again.

Each time Donghyuck unlocked his phone and looked at the date he was reminded just how little time he really had. That was unless he actually made a move - and by that he didn’t mean kissing Renjun or fucking him senseless. 

What he meant was something serious, a conversation that the two of them had to have at some point. One which they were both avoiding and dragging out. One which they tiptoed around, day in and day out because despite their age, they were both the same terrified young boys at heart. 

But Donghyuck could feel it in the way Renjun touched him. He noticed it in the way the older man would look at him, the way even the softest smile would reach his eyes. It was clear as day that what Donghyuck felt was reciprocated, 

The only obstacle that stood in the way was Mark.

Donghyuck really had to ask, but why was Renjun even with him? Why did he stick around after all this time when he clearly wasn’t happy in the relationship - not in a way that truly mattered.

And on Monday evening, after Donghyuck got back home after work, he got his much awaited answer. 

When Donghyuck got back, he was surprised to find that Renjun had dinner ready. At first, he assumed the older man had ordered take out, however given the pots and pans and Renjun’s proud look on his face, it soon became obvious it was all his doing. 

“You made this for me?” Donghyuck asked, wrapping his arms around Renjun, pulling him in for a warm embrace.

Renjun scoffed. “Not everything’s about you,” he pointed out. “I live here too, you know?”

Amused, Donghyuck hummed. No matter how hard Renjun tried to pretend, he still couldn’t hide the blush creeping up his neck and cheeks. “Of course. Is that why you cooked my favourite for dinner? Or is that just a coincidence?”

“Lucky coincidence.”

“Ah. Of course. It happens.”

“It happens,” Renjun confirmed, shivering when Donghyuck kissed the sensitive spot underneath his ear. At first he went rigid before he gave in and melted into Donghyuck’s arms, resting his weight on the younger man who was more than willing to support him. “Are you hungry?”

“Starving,” Donghyuck replied, playfully taking a bite out of Renjun’s neck. It earned him a scandalised gasp and a light pat to the head, only for Renjun to laugh in the end. 

“You animal.”

“Feed me or I’ll have to eat you up, Renjunnie. Or do you like the sound of that?”

“No comment.”

“That’s as good a response as any,” Donghyuck mused, slipping his hand under Renjun’s hoodie (was it one of his he packed for the month?) and pinching his waist. “I’m gonna devour you until there’s nothing left.”

“And waste all the food I made?”

“I’ll make room.”

Despite how eager he was to lift Renjun and haul him to the bedroom, they did actually have dinner at the kitchen table. It was by no means anything noteworthy, but it was also the best meal Donghyuck had in his entire life on the sole basis that it was made for him by Renjun. This was something only for the two of them to share, and how was Donghyuck not meant to cherish it? 

With the leftovers, Donghyuck packed some for his lunch for work tomorrow. Jaemin did question since when Donghyuck actually made himself proper food for work but that was that, not really expecting Renjun to cook for him given his track record. After all, Renjun really wasn’t known as the type to spend more than five minutes in the kitchen when necessary. Which was why the food that he made for the two of them meant so much more to Donghyuck; Renjun had gone out of his way for him for no apparent reason other than he just wanted to. 

Since it was only fair, Donghyuck was the one to clean up after them. As he stood by the sink, scrubbing the pots and pans clean, Renjun came to stand behind him. He nuzzled his face in between Donghyuck’s shoulder blades, purring like a cat.

“Can I help?” Donghyuck asked, briefly looking over his shoulder to look at the older man. He couldn’t really make out much, but his heart clenched nevertheless from how adorable Renjun was. 

“Maybe,” Renjun replied. 

“Really? How?”

Renjun hummed. “Depends,” he mused, causing Donghyuck to laugh.

“Oh so you’re speaking in riddles now?”

“I’m not,” Renjun argued. “You’re just slow.”

Donghyuck scoffed. “Am I? Don’t answer that.”

Amused, Renjun snorted. “Are you tired?”

“Not really. Why? Do you have something in mind?” Donghyuck paused washing up, straining his neck to look back properly at Renjun. The older man wore an impish smile, his body pressing closer against Donghyuck’s back. It didn’t take a genius to understand what he wanted. Donghyuck chuckled, looking back at the dirty dishes. “Alright. I’ll just finish up here and meet you in the bedroom. Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

Satisfied with the outcome, Renjun leaned up on his tip-toes to place a gentle kiss to Donghyuck’s cheek before he made his way to the bedroom. It took Donghyuck a short minute to stop grinning to himself, shaking his head in disbelief. It almost felt too good to be true.

 What, Renjun cooked him dinner and now was propositioning sex? Did Donghyuck get knocked out and die? 

As far as he was aware, he was still alive, so it probably wasn’t that. 

Nevertheless, Donghyuck continued with the dishes, wiping his hands dry once he was done. 

However, he didn’t rush, giving Renjun some time to get ready. In the meantime, Donghyuck opted to wipe down the dining table and clean up around the living room, picking up the mug of cold coffee left and long forgotten by Renjun. He poured it down the sink, keeping himself busy.

As he finished up, Donghyuck’s phone vibrated in his pocket. 

He grabbed it only to see Mark’s contact across his screen. A message and then another.

It wasn’t anything urgent: just Mark checking in on everyone.

Mark

Hey

All good back home?

Donghyuck

Everything’s set on fire

We’re living under a bridge now

Mark

Seriously!?

Donghyuck

…

Mark

Right

You’re pulling my leg

Should be used to it now

Donghyuck

You don’t say

Mark

Anyway, how are things? 

I’ve tried texting Renjun but he’s giving me short answers

Is he mad at me?

Donghyuck scoffed. What would ever give him that idea?

Donghyuck

Have you done anything to make him mad?

Mark

I don’t know

He doesn’t tell me

And with us being so far apart it’s not like I can tell

I haven’t done anything though!

Not that I’m aware of

The last time I called him we just chatted for a bit and he sounded tired which I guess makes sense with the time zones and all that

But over texts he’s just so… cold

Do you think I pissed him off somehow?

He said he didn’t want to go with me, but what if he wanted me to ask him?

What if he wanted me to persuade him?

Donghyuck

Would that have changed anything?

You seem busy

Mark

Yeah…

Honestly, I’m barely at the hotel 

Maybe it’s best that Renjun isn’t here

I know last time he got annoyed with that

I made it up to him but still

Does he miss me?

Oh what a funny question to ask. 

Donghyuck

How would I know that

I’m not a mind reader or anything

Mark

Yeah

Okay

I’ll try talking to him again

Thanks, Hyuck

It’s getting pretty late, right?

Sleep well!

Donghyuck

Thanks

You too

With that, Donghyuck locked his phone. He sighed, dragging a hand down his face. He didn’t even know what to say to Mark anymore. It’s not like he could actively help him when all he wanted was for Mark’s and Renjun’s relationship to crash and burn; he couldn’t tell him that Renjun was actually mad with him and that it went beyond this stupid month-long work trip of his. If he did, he would be giving Mark a chance to figure his shit out, and quite frankly he couldn’t have that. After all, would Renjun stay with Mark if he did show signs of change?

Donghyuck couldn’t have that. At least this way he still had a shot. 

After checking the time, Donghyuck made the executive decision to head to the bedroom. He turned the lights off on his way, following the thin slither of warm light pouring out from the ajar doors. When he entered, Renjun was sitting on the edge of his bed, phone in hand as he typed out a text. 

It was obvious who he was talking to.

“Is he bothering you too?” Donghyuck asked, attempting to make a joke of it. 

Renjun hummed just as another message poured in. 

“He thinks you’re mad at him.”

“I know,” Renjun replied, not sending anything back. More texts came flooding in from Mark. 

Donghyuck didn’t say anything further, opting to step into the en-suite bathroom to freshen up himself. He washed his face and brushed his teeth, checking his reflection in the mirror. 

There were signs of exhaustion under his eyes from a long day, and his hair looked matted and tousled, but other than that he didn’t look all that bad. Definitely not as gorgeous as Renjun, but still handsome. He had to look good enough if Renjun wanted to sleep with him in the first place. 

Wanting to give himself a bit of a boost, Donghyuck applied some moisturiser before accepting he wasn’t going to look much better without his beauty sleep and a shower. Renjun just had to deal with it. 

Once he stepped out, Renjun glanced up from his phone. Apparently Mark was still texting him. 

That didn’t sit right with Donghyuck.

“Can’t you just tell him you’re busy?”

“Busy? With what?” Renjun asked, a hint of a smirk appearing by the corner of his mouth. 

“Sleep?”

Renjun laughed. “That’s a good one. I’m too busy sleeping.”

“It’s convincing,” Donghyuck pointed out, taking off his shirt casually whilst Renjun’s eyes followed every movement - every flex of muscle. “You do sleep a lot. I’m sure he’ll understand.”

“Maybe,” Renjun mused. “But he’s trying to appease me in one of the few ways he knows how to.”

“Oh?” That piqued Donghyuck’s curiosity, dropping his hand down to his waistband, loving the way Renjun sucked in his breath with anticipation. “Is he talking dirty to you over text? That’s cute. Too bad that you’re busy with the real thing, right? Or am I interrupting? I can always leave if you prefer to play along with him. I’m sure he’s got a filthy mouth,” Donghyuck joked. “I bet he’s proper about it too. Oh Renjun, I want to put my penis inside of you,” he said with his best impersonation of Mark’s voice. 

That only made Renjun laugh, covering his face in embarrassment. 

“I will pour exactly a hundred millilitres of lube out to prep you,” Donghyuck continued, earning himself a loud snort from Renjun.

“Hundred?”

“More? Less? I don’t know - don’t question it.”

Grinning, Renjun nodded. “Alright. Do go on.”

And Donghyuck did, finally pulling his pants down, hearing an audible gasp from Renjun who pushed himself up the bed. 

His pretty legs were bare, bony knees joined together, waiting for Donghyuck to spread them apart for him. Renjun’s sleep shirt was long, reaching down to the middle of his milky thighs, but Donghyuck had a feeling that there wasn't anything else underneath there. 

He was teasing Donghyuck.

“You’re not tired, are you, baby?” Donghyuck asked, kicking off his pants to the side. He knelt at the end of the bed before slowly crawling over towards Renjun like a predator approaching its delicate, sweet prey. 

“No. Why?”

“I just don’t think I’ll be able to stop myself tonight,” Donghyuck replied. “Think you can handle that?”

“We’ll have to find out.”

Donghyuck smirked, humming in agreement. He leaned down, kissing Renjun's bare foot up along his shin up to his closely pressed knees. The touch of his lips was delicate and reverent, met with a graceful deity like Renjun upon his endless travels. He had to give him all of his love - all his worship and dedication. 

He kissed the ball of Renjun’s knee as his hand slipped in between his legs, stroking the inside of his calf to open him up. And it worked. Slowly, Renjun’s legs parted for Donghyuck. Just like expected, once his legs were spread open, Donghyuck’s suspicions were proven true: Renjun wasn’t wearing anything other than his loose shirt. His pretty cock and supple ass were all for the taking, and it only made Donghyuck feel ravenous. 

“Eager, aren’t we?” Donghyuck mused, his satisfaction thick in his voice. “You can’t wait for me to fuck you, can’t you?” He continued, trailing kisses down Renjun’s thighs and up to his hip bone, pushing the fabric of his shirt away to feel the soft skin beneath his lips. “Fucked you so good you realised what you’ve been missing out on, right?”

Renjun swallowed, the tips of his ears reddening. 

“Embarassed to say it? I won’t judge.”

“It’ll only get to your head,” Renjun argued.

Donghyuck chuckled. “Which one?”

Renjun could only roll his eyes. 

“You’re so cute when you’re shy. I almost forgot how feisty you can get.”

“I’ll show you feisty if you don’t hurry up already,” Renjun uttered with the most adorable pout. Donghyuck had no other choice than to kiss it off his lips. 

Thankfully, Renjun was more than happy to melt underneath the pressure of their joined mouths, smiling in honest satisfaction as he allowed Donghyuck to crowd over him. He laid down flat beneath Donghyuck, his legs spread to make room for him. 

Donghyuck dragged his hands up along Renjun’s waist, pulling his shirt up inch by inch until he forced it over Renjun’s head, getting rid of the pesky annoyance. Now, there was nothing left in between them. Just as it should be. 

With Renjun all to himself, Donghyuck took his time kissing him all over. His lips, cheeks, jaw, the column of his neck down to his shoulders, chest, his cute and pert nipples, all the way down to his stomach and hips. 

Renjun trembled and sighed from the onslaught of affection, treated with the reverence he deserved. And Donghyuck couldn’t get enough of it either, feeling starved, needing all of Renjun to feel satisfied. His lips continued down on their sacred pilgrimage, focusing on Renjun’s thighs, biting and sucking on them, leaving a nice and distinct mark on the inside - a spot dangerously close to Renjun’s cock. 

He got lost in the process, reaching for the lube amidst his daze. He poured out a fair amount, slicking his fingers in the cool liquid so that he could work Renjun up.

The older man sucked in his breath, looking down in between his legs where Donghyuck’s mouth teased just around his erection, kissing the sensitive skin at the base as he urged Renjun to lift one of his legs up to grant him better access to his ass. 

Willingly, Renjun did just as instructed, gasping when Donghyuck’s finger slipped past his tight ring of muscle. He whined - such a sweet, tender noise - biting down on his lip the deeper Donghyuck pushed inside. 

But that wasn’t good enough for Donghyuck. He wanted more.

Hence, Donghyuck finally licked up along the length of Renjun’s cock right to the tip before he wrapped his mouth around it. He didn’t give the older man much of a chance to adjust before he sank down completely, submerging him in the delectable, sopping heat of his mouth. Renjun moaned, back arching up from the mattress. 

Now, Donghyuck had Renjun just like he wanted. He spread him open slowly with his fingers - in and out, time and time again, curling his fingers up ever so slightly to find and press up against the bundle of nerves deep inside. Renjun was responsive, every movement earning a heavenly whine or whimper out of him, his muscles flexing. 

It was perfect.

And then they were interrupted.

The ringtone was obnoxiously loud.

Renjun groaned, glancing to the side where he previously discarded his phone. He tried to reach for it to decline the call, however Donghyuck felt a nasty, vile pang of jealousy coursing right through his veins. 

A jealousy which made him reckless and possessive. He should have told Renjun to ignore the call - to focus on Donghyuck and only Donghyuck. It was what he should have done before as well, instead making Renjun cry because Donghyuck couldn’t do one thing right. 

Donghyuck wasn’t brave.

But he was stupid. He was reckless. And that’s exactly why he stopped Renjun from declining the call.

“Answer it,” he uttered, face between Renjun’s thighs, the taste of the older man’s excitement on his tongue. 

Dumbfounded, Renjun stuttered. “W-what?”

“Answer it,” Donghyuck repeated, taking Renjun’s cockhead back into his mouth, suckling on the tip as his dark eyes kept contact with Renjun. He felt the man twitch, adrenaline pumping through his veins. Renjun liked this too. He liked this side of Donghyuck. 

The second dragged on for what felt like years, but finally, Renjun answered Mark’s call. He put his phone to his ear, greeting Mark with an airy and faint “hello.” 

He did his best to contain his current breathless state - made all the worse by Donghyuck who insisted on kissing and touching him the whole time. As Renjun spoke to Mark, Donghyuck was busy with making Renjun actually feel good with his mouth and fingers. 

Renjun was tense, muscles clenching to stop his body from enjoying Donghyuck’s ministrations too much. But the more he tried to hide, the more obvious it became just how much he liked everything Donghyuck was doing to him. 

“I’m in bed,” Renjun said to Mark. “Why? Ah. Is that it? No I’m- I’m good. Yeah I can-” He bit down a moan when Donghyuck swallowed around his length at the same time as his fingers curled up against his prostate, stimulating him from both ends. “I can. Are you in bed too? Mmm, yeah, sounds good.”

Donghyuck wanted to laugh at the way Renjun’s words came out practically monotone. He slowly dragged his mouth off Renjun’s erection, licking his lips clean before mouthing “speaker” to Renjun. At that, the older man’s eyes widened in horror. But honestly, where was the fun if Donghyuck couldn’t hear what was happening?

It took some persuasion in the form of slipping another finger inside of Renjun’s sweltering heat to get the man to comply. Who knew it would be that easy to get Renjun to do whatever Donghyuck wanted?

“I missed your voice, baby,” Mark said over the line. It felt wrong to hear him like this, but Donghyuck couldn’t really care right now. Renjun was supposed to be his, and he would prove it one way or another. “It gets lonely without you.”

“You’re just saying that.”

“You know I mean it, baby.”

Donghyuck rolled his eyes. 

“Wish I could hold you right now.”

Then he shouldn’t have left. Now Donghyuck was doing the job he couldn’t do himself. 

Mark continued to speak - all different flavours of “I miss you” and “I want you” - to the point that Donghyuck blanked him out, focusing only on Renjun and how sweet he tasted. 

The older man was leaking into his mouth, tangy pre-cum coating Donghyuck’s cheeks and tongue as he swallowed all of him up with great pleasure. He took devilish glee in the fact Renjun had to hold himself back when he obviously wanted to moan and cry out Donghyuck’s name, his back arching and muscles pulled taut with strain and arousal. 

Yet a part of Donghyuck didn’t want to let Renjun cum just yet. And so, he pulled himself off his cock, kissing his stomach, waist and chest instead. His fingers stayed where they were, slowly pumping in and out of Renjun, the glide smooth from the lube softening Renjun up for his cock. 

“Are you touching yourself, baby?”

Renjun glanced down, swallowing the lump in his throat. “Y-yeah,” he uttered, just loud enough for his voice to be caught on the phone. Donghyuck smirked against the skin of Renjun’s thigh, his teeth lightly scraping over the flesh. 

“Your cock or your ass?”

“Both.”

A low noise akin to a whine came from the other side. If only Mark knew exactly what was going on right now. 

“How many fingers?”

Donghyuck grinned. 

“Tw- three,” Renjun gasped right as Donghyuck slipped a third one inside. It was a tight stretch, but Renjun could take it. He could take it well, just like he could take Donghyuck’s cock. But that would come soon. 

“Three? Already?”

Donghyuck bit on the soft muscle of Renjun’s thigh, quickly licking over the spot to soothe it. 

“Y-yeah.”

Mark’s dirty talk honestly needed some improvement, but at the very least he wasn’t skipping through the foreplay so Donghyuck had to give him some kudos for that. However, he was quite slow and boring. No wonder Renjun pounced on Donghyuck: he needed a good fuck. 

And Donghyuck needed that too, which is why he needed to move things along before he did something even dumber than fingering Renjun open with Mark blissfully unaware over the phone. 

Donghyuck reached for the lube again, pulling his fingers out of Renjun, hearing the older man whine at the cruel loss. To placate him, Donghyuck kissed his throat, smiling over the heated skin. He guided his hand over to his own neglected cock, heavy and aching. The second he barely brushed over it, Donghyuck held back a painful hiss, face scrunched in lust fuelled agony. 

Renjun cupped his face, brushing his thumbs beneath Donghyuck’s eyes, easing the tension written across his expression. The touch was grounding amidst the strokes of Donghyuck’s hand over his erection, dragging the lube all over the length, working himself up even more. All he had done was touch and please Renjun, yet that was enough to already get him to this point, dripping with want for the older man. 

Donghyuck propped himself up and leaned to whisper in Renjun’s ear, careful to stay at the other side of the phone. “Hurry up,” was all he had to say before he pulled himself away, kneeling between Renjun’s spread legs. 

He gripped onto the man’s thighs and yanked him closer, his eyes flickering over to one of the pillows in a silent request. Renjun understood instantly, reaching behind himself and passing the firm pillow over for Donghyuck to slip under Renjun’s back. 

Sitting back, Donghyuck had the perfect view of Renjun, naked and gorgeously flushed. He guided Renjun to wrap his legs around his torso, adjusting his position so that he rubbed against the man’s supple ass. 

Mark said something, but Donghyuck wasn’t paying attention to him at all. Not when he had Renjun right in front of him. 

He didn’t wait for a sign, pushing his hips forward until his cock breached Renjun’s dripping opening. Once he was in, Donghyuck gripped onto Renjun’s waist, pushing him further onto his wanton length. The older man’s mouth flew wide open, the angle making even a single breath feel vivid. 

Renjun reached down towards Donghyuck’s hands, digging his nails into the man’s forearms as he adjusted, his luscious walls giving way, inch by inch. He threw his head back, a bawdy moan spilling past his lips. All for Donghyuck.

“That good, baby?”

Right. Mark was there. Whose idea was this anyway? Oh, right: Donghyuck’s.

Renjun could only respond with a deep hum - one which teetered on yet another moan. 

Donghyuck took great pride in that. And he would happily show Mark just how good he could make Renjun feel. He was certain that Mark never heard Renjun moan quite like he did from Donghyuck’s outpour of love. 

He tightened his grip on Renjun’s hips, forcing himself deeper inside until all he could feel was the sublime scorching heat of Renjun’s entrance. It took all of Donghyuck’s restraint to keep completely quiet, biting down a groan from deep within his chest. The way Renjun clenched around him, twitching with anticipation from being teased open with Donghyuck’s fingers for far too long, it would drive even the strongest man insane. 

Renjun was keeping his reactions under wraps too as if to not come across too eager - perhaps not to wound Mark’s ego. 

Still, as funny as it was, Donghyuck wanted Renjun loose and unrestrained, caring only about the pleasure he experienced without anything standing in the way. And so, he didn’t give Renjun much of a warning before he rolled his hips back before slamming right back into him. 

The abrupt thrust punched a strained moan out of the older man, mouth wide open as the angle allowed Donghyuck to reach all that he needed to. 

He repeated the act, a mischievous smirk written across his face, loving the way Renjun came apart beneath him. He truly could never get tired of seeing Renjun like this, completely at his mercy, body contorting and trembling with the overwhelming weight of his arousal. 

It only made Donghyuck want more. And soon enough, with enough encouragement from Renjun’s body, Donghyuck proceeded to pound into him vigorously. The moans and cries which poured out of Renjun were pornographic, lewd to the point Donghyuck thought the older man was playing it up. 

Yet when he looked at Renjun’s face he knew that it was real. His nails clawed at Donghyuck’s forearms before they lost strength, opting to grip onto the bedsheets and pillows to ground himself. 

“Fuck, baby, are you using a toy?”

Something far better, actually.

The shock in Mark’s voice filled Donghyuck with a sense of pride - as if this was something Mark had never heard from Renjun before. At least not to this extent. And only Donghyuck could make Renjun feel this good. Nobody else - not even his boyfriend of seven years. 

It only spurred Donghyuck to fuck Renjun harder, each thrust met with an even more beautiful noise. Renjun was shaking his head, blabbering as he approached his peak. 

“Oh fuck, baby, I’m close.”

Renjun gasped, thighs clamping hard around Donghyuck’s waist in anticipation. Donghyuck wasn’t far behind either, his clear excitement spilling out and coating Renjun’s walls, mixing along with the lube that he kept fucking in and out, the squelch of it a crude melody paired with the symphony of Renjun’s cries. 

Donghyuck was struggling to keep himself up right, his body aching but determined to reach the end with Renjun. He leaned back, pulling Renjun along with him as his thrusts became far more frenetic and desperate. But that still wasn’t enough. 

“Oh god, baby. You’re so good. So good for me. All mine,” Mark said over the line, his words hurried and strained.

And this time around, Renjun did humour him with a response. 

However, he looked right at Donghyuck as he uttered “all yours.” There was a moment of genuine clarity between them - a moment where lust and desperation didn’t win over - which made Renjun’s two simple words wrap around them in a tender moment all before they rammed right into Donghyuck’s heart like a freight train. “Yours,” he repeated, blown out eyes locked with Donghyuck’s own, the contact delicate. “All yours.”

Those two words rang loud in Donghyuck’s ears. So loud that it was all he could focus on. He blocked out everything else, only feeling the warmth which they provided, his heart leaping with joy - a somewhat bittersweet joy, waiting all this time to truly hear exactly what Renjun felt towards him. 

It was as good as a confession could ever be. It was his confirmation. And though he could tell before, now he was certain. Renjun was all his, and Renjun wanted it that way.

It overwhelmed Donghyuck. And it felt good. 

Donghyuck didn’t have any more strength to sit back; he leaned forward, caging Renjun between his arms as his thrusts became animalistic, hips pistoning wildly into Renjun. 

He pressed his face against the crook of Renjun’s neck, kissing and biting over the skin as he quietly echoed Renjun’s own words right back at him. “Yours. All yours.”

As if it wasn’t painfully obvious already. 

Renjun wrapped his arms around Donghyuck, dragging streaks of red across Donghyuck’s back where his nails scratched him up. He was trembling, weak towards Donghyuck’s passionate onslaught. His cries were getting higher and higher, broken up with every ravenous thrust until he couldn’t hold back anymore.

The older man came with a heavy moan, hips bucking up as he spilled in thick ropes of white between their tightly pressed bodies. He became softer and hotter in Donghyuck’s embrace, his heat a suffocating furnace around Donghyuck’s plunderous cock. It became debilitating to continue, and Donghyuck was soon to join him in his euphoric bliss. 

To suppress his own moan, Donghyuck bit down hard into Renjun’s shoulder - hard enough that he was certain he drew blood. 

And as he came, wave after wave, Donghyuck couldn’t stop the frenetic and zealous way of his hips. He fucked every last drop out of them - every last whine and cry, every tremble and twitch of muscle. He didn’t stop until Renjun was limp beneath him, gasping for air which didn’t fill his lungs. 

Renjun barely had enough strength to reprimand Donghyuck for his overeager virality by dragging his nails over Donghyuck’s arm. Only then did Donghyuck feel the exhaustion too, collapsing on top of Renjun with a soft laugh, the sound muffled against the older man’s skin. 

He was elated, his heart full. 

“Oh fuck, Renjun-”

Renjun aimlessly searched for the phone, slamming his hand all over the mattress in search of it so that he could end the call as soon as he could. He kept failing, flailing his arms around until Donghyuck finally helped him out, grabbing the device just to promptly disconnect. He made sure to double check that the call was actually over before he tossed the phone back down, now having Renjun completely to himself to adorn with kisses. 

“You are- a menace,” Renjun uttered, breathless and hoarse.

Donghyuck hummed. “Maybe. But you liked that, didn’t you?” He kissed the column of Renjun’s throat and then down to his ribcage, pressing a long and firm kiss over his pounding heart. “You like it when I get a bit mean, don’t you? That’s our thing, right?”

Renjun bit down a moan when Donghyuck wrapped his mouth around Renjun’s nipple, playfully nipping the bud with his teeth. 

“He seemed surprised you could even sound like that,” Donghyuck continued. “A toy? I’m better than that, aren’t I, Renjunnie? You prefer me, don’t you?” He asked, looking up with pathetically honest hope behind his eyes. 

Renjun whimpered, reaching for Donghyuck’s face to pull him towards his lips. He kissed him, shutting Donghyuck up in the best way possible. And when he did part from the kiss, Renjun looked Donghyuck right in the eyes, contemplating what to say to him.

“You’re infuriating," Renjun confessed. “In a way I can’t fucking get enough of.”

Donghyuck chuckled. “Right back at you, Renjunnie.”

“And right now, I want you to fuck me into the mattress. Do you think you can do that?”

Already up for the task, Donghyuck’s cock twitched in anticipation. “Since you asked me so nicely,” he mused, kissing Renjun one last time before he abruptly flipped him over. “I’ll do my best for you, baby.”

♡♡♡

Donghyuck laid with his ear pressed against Renjun’s heart, the beat slowly softening as the adrenaline rush of their nightly activities dissipated. He had his hand over Renjun’s tummy, stroking up and down in a soothing rhythm, his fingertips occasionally pressing down harder over the pale skin. 

As for Renjun, the older man had his own hand buried in the mess that was Donghyuck’s hair, massaging the man’s scalp and the base of his skull, drawing out a shudder and pleased sigh from Donghyuck here and there. 

After the phone call, it felt like something had snapped - impossible to be put back to its original shape. But it wasn’t a bad thing per se. 

It almost seemed natural and needed. They both took things way too far, and now no matter how they looked at it, there was no way to skirt around the topic at hand.

“Are you gonna leave him?” Donghyuck asked, breaking the serene silence in the bedroom. Renjun didn’t tense beneath him, almost as if he had been expecting Donghyuck to utter those exact words by now. “You’re not happy with him, are you?”

“It’s complicated.”

Donghyuck hummed. “Complicated,” he echoed, the single word dripping with sardony. “That’s one way to put it.”

“It is complicated,” Renjun reiterated firmly. “I’ve- I’ve spent seven years with him,” he pointed out as if Donghyuck didn’t know by this point. Oh god did he know. He spent those seven years pining and wallowing in his misery from afar. “And I- I do love him. A part of him. The idea of him.”

“But not the real thing.”

“He’s… You know.”

“Yeah, I know.”

Mark the saint who can do no wrong. Always kind, spoiling those around him. Sweet and caring and helpful. The perfect lover in theory. A great friend - in part. 

But the real thing is far more complex than that, and over the past three weeks spent with only Renjun, Donghyuck came to see just how different the idea of Mark was to the truth. He was barely present with his own boyfriend, so much so that their shared bedroom shows no signs of him. He is easy to replace, taking his spot without anyone realising. Like a ghost.

“Why are you with him though?”

Renjun chewed on his bottom lip, mulling the words around in his head. “I… It’s… It’s easy,” he admitted. “When he asked me out I- I said yes since it felt right, and when a year passed it already felt like… like we were beating a dead horse,” Renjun explained. “We shouldn’t have made it past the two year mark, but he suggested we move in together and I got comfortable. That’s all.”

A relationship of convenience with the spark long extinguished. One where there were only scraps of love left - most of them in Mark’s possession. 

Because Mark loved Renjun in whatever way he could, and Donghyuck knew that more than anyone; he saw the way his best friend spoke of Renjun, a bright light glimmering in his eyes, a fond look to him. His voice always softened and he always wanted what was the best for Renjun, but what was the best for him would never include Mark in the picture. Donghyuck knew that now.

“Why couldn’t you have asked first?” Renjun uttered, the question doused with poignant sorrow and regret. “Why did you have to-” He halted, exhaling and shaking his head. “You said you were scared. That’s it, right? You thought I hated you?”

“Yeah…”

“Well, look where that got us now,” Renjun mused. 

“You can still leave him,” Donghyuck pointed out. 

“I know. But I- Not like this.”

“Like what?”

Renjun shrugged. “Just like this. I- He deserves one more chance.”

Donghyuck scoffed, pushing himself up to rest on his elbow. “One more chance for what? To change for the better?” He asked with a faint laughter catching his words. “He’s had seven years, Renjun. What difference will one chance make? You know him. I know him. He won’t change,” he pointed out as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. Because it was. Even if Mark saw all his flaws and the errors in his ways, he still wouldn’t be able to shift his priorities from work. It’s as if he was born to work, everything else secondary. “He won’t.”

Renjun’s eyes met Donghyuck’s, holding his gaze steadily with a deep understanding. “I know,” he admitted.

And Donghyuck understood what Renjun meant by one more chance. The last chance. It was nothing more than an act - his way of letting Mark land the finishing blow to their relationship. Mark could either cling on, or sever their connection. It was his choice. 

The realisation left Donghyuck feeling uneasy. His mouth went dry and he swallowed, glancing down and away from Renjun’s eyes. “Oh,” was all he could muster. “And after that?” He asked after a minute, looking back at Renjun, hopeful.

“I don’t know,” the older man replied. “It depends.”

“On what?”

“On you.”

On whether Donghyuck could do what he couldn’t do all those years ago.

“Why do you want me to leave Mark? Be honest.”

As if these past three weeks weren't proof enough. But they weren’t, because not once during their time together did Donghyuck speak the complete, honest truth. And now was his time. It was now or never.

“Because I love you,” Donghyuck confessed, his own heart hammering in his chest. He felt it in his throat and heard it in his ears, feeling far more vulnerable than he ever was. 

Donghyuck was laid bare in front of Renjun - truly laid bare, open for Renjun to witness. No disguises, no sarcasm and witty remarks to save him now. Just the real, raw and true Donghyuck.

Renjun sucked in a sharp breath, his lips parting ever so slightly. The same lips Donghyuck had felt beneath him - delicate and sweet. Lips which drove him crazy and lips which he cherished with all his heart. Lips which he would do anything to feel against him even just one more time. 

“I love you,” Donghyuck continued. “And I have loved you for so long. And I never did anything, because I never in a million years thought that you would- that you would ever feel the same about me. I thought that I got on your nerves so much and- but that’s just our thing, right? That’s just us.”

The older man cracked a brief smile - fond yet sorrowful. A tender and beautiful thing. “Yeah. That’s our thing.”

Donghyuck hummed, glancing down momentarily. He licked his lips, the nerves drying them out. “And you know, I- I thought you were happy with Mark so I just… never really did anything,” he admitted. “I even helped him pick out date spots for you - though it turns out he didn’t take you out as often as I thought. But I- if I had known then maybe-” He stopped himself from saying a complete lie. 

Even if he knew, he wouldn’t have made the first move. He would have waited for Renjun, just like this time around. 

“I want you to leave him so you can be with me. I’m not going to make some grand promises - I definitely won’t be able to afford you the same comfortable life Mark can, but I know I can treat you better than him. If that’s what you want.”

Renjun smiled, pushing himself up so that he was eye to eye with Donghyuck. He leaned his face closer, cupping Donghyuck’s jaw, tilting his head ever so slightly so that Donghyuck would have no other choice than to look him in the eye. 

“I want that,” Renjun confirmed. “I want you. And I love you too.”

Words which Donghyuck never expected to hear in his lifetime. He thought he was dreaming, perhaps hallucinating after Renjun completely drained the life out of him in bed. But no: he heard correctly. Donghyuck heard Renjun’s confession, and now it was certain there was no room left for misunderstandings between them. 

Renjun loved Donghyuck, just as Donghyuck loved Renjun. It was in their own, weird way, but it was theirs. 

Each passing second left Donghyuck feeling like he was slipping away - losing his grip on sanity. He sucked in a sharp breath, his eyes shaking, heart palpitating loud and clear in his chest. He must have looked an utter fool, shaken to the core by Renjun’s simple yet poignant response - so much so that it amused the older man, his soft smile picking up a fondness only meant for Donghyuck. 

Renjun brushed his thumb across Donghyuck’s cheek before he closed the distance between their mouths. A delicate peck of the lips, tender and sweet, ending as soon as it started. 

When he pulled away, he only did so momentarily. Their eyes locked and lips pressed in a ghost touch, neither man could resist the magnetic pull between them. And one kiss turned into two and then into a never ending flurry, interrupted only by airy laughter and sighs. 

Overwhelmed with his love for Renjun, Donghyuck simply couldn’t stop once he started. He pushed the man back down on the bed, his hands roaming every single sliver of exposed skin. There was not a single inch of Renjun that he left unexplored, be it with his hands or mouth. And Renjun gladly obliged, melting into the kiss and sinking back into the mattress, opening himself up for Donghyuck to take without an ounce of restraint. 

Breathless and heavy “I love you”s poured out between them, neither of them quite sure who said what. But it didn’t matter. What mattered was that they loved each other. What mattered was this moment right now - the safety and security which came from being in each other’s embrace, the world around them meaningless. They had each other. 

“I’ve loved you since I first set my eyes on you,” Donghyuck uttered, delirious and overflowing with affection. He wasn’t sure if that was even the case, but it felt right; it felt as if he had loved Renjun from the very beginning, no matter the details. He loved Renjun from the start, even if he didn’t completely know it back then. “I wanted to kiss you at every chance I had. Whenever you got mad at me I- god, I wanted to kiss you stupid.”

“I wish you did.”

Donghyuck smiled into their kiss. “Yeah. Me too.”

But now he had his chance. He had the opportunity to kiss Renjun from sunrise to sunset, from Monday to Sunday, spring to winter. He had Renjun all for himself, and he would never let him go. He would never make the same mistake again. Once he had Renjun, he would ensure he never lost him. 

He kissed Renjun's mouth down along his throat, teasing the sensitive skin with a light scrape of his teeth. Further down, he peppered his chest with kisses, up to his shoulders and then back again to his neck, nipping at the skin behind his ear just to feel Renjun shudder beneath him. 

From what Donghyuck learned, Renjun really was so sensitive around his ears, giving Donghyuck even more animation to tease him by blowing over the skin or sucking on it, all for Renjun to whine and squirm and get oh so cute and excited. 

“Fuck, Renjunnie, I can’t get enough of you.”

“Yeah?”

Donghyuck hummed, dragging his nose over Renjun’s neck, inhaling his scent. “Yeah.”

“Good.”

The cockiness in Renjun’s voice had Donghyuck groaning, sinking his teeth into the meat of Renjun’s shoulder. “You like being the centre of attention, don’t you, baby?”

“You have a problem with that?”

Donghyuck chuckled, soothing the bite mark with his mouth. “Not at all. It’s not like anyone can steal you away from me, right? Nobody can love you the way I do.”

Renjun bit his bottom lip, humming in agreement. 

“And I need everyone to know you’re mine.”

“How are you gonna do that?”

Donghyuck grinned, pushing himself up. “How do you think? I’ll just have to fuck you until everyone can smell me on you.”

That earned a boisterous laughter out of Renjun. “What are you? A dog?”

“Yeah. And I think I’m going into rut, baby. Help me out?”

Renjun snorted, pushing the hair out of Donghyuck’s face. “Again?”

Donghyuck nodded, nuzzling his face into the palm of Renjun’s hand. “You drive me crazy, Renjunnie. It must be your pheromones."

And yet another giddy laugh, finding Donghyuck beyond ridiculous yet still so charming. “You’re such a loser.”

“Maybe. But only for you, baby. I love you so much.”

That seemed to do the trick, because no matter how stupid Renjun found Donghyuck, he still pulled the man down for a deep and passionate kiss, licking his tongue into his mouth. Despite how tired they both were, Renjun still had it in him to tease Donghyuck, biting down on the younger man’s lip, dragging it before offering Donghyuck a coy smile. 

Breathless, Donghyuck could only stare, dumbfounded and needy. And then Renjun pushed him away all so that he could flip himself over, preening his ass for Donghyuck. Remnants of lube and Donghyuck’s earlier releases dripped along the sinful curve and down Renjun’s thighs, enticing Donghyuck in. 

Renjun looked over his shoulder, the look in his eyes dark and dangerous. “You can slip inside,” he said, playful as Donghyuck was once more left gripping onto his sanity. “It’s all yours anyway,” he added, reaching behind himself to spread his cheeks apart, his pucker fluttering. “So come take it.”

Neither of them would be able to walk tomorrow.

♡♡♡

Donghyuck wished it could last forever.

The month had passed by far too quickly - cruelly so. He had gotten used to being here with Renjun, greeting and ending the day with the man by his side, sharing a bed, wrapped up in each other’s embrace all throughout the night. 

They would wake up together (even if Renjun complained about having to be up so early, though he didn’t have to join Donghyuck in the morning anyway) and share a coffee and light breakfast to get through the day. 

When Donghyuck left to work, he would bid farewell with a lingering kiss from Renjun, sometimes so tempting that Donghyuck debated if he should risk being late just so that he could kiss Renjun some more. But once he did finally pry himself off, he would take one last look at Renjun to give him the strength to make it through the day, desperate to get back to the man his heart yearned for.

During the day, Donghyuck would carry on as usual, entertained by Jaemin as well as whatever the kids at the daycare got up to. Still, his eyes would find themselves on the clock more often than not, counting down the hours then minutes and then seconds until he could leave and make his way back to Renjun.

“Are you seeing someone?” Jaemin asked when it became obvious just how badly Donghyuck wanted to leave. “Or do you just hate your job that much? That’s also an option. You know, Jeno thinks I should change jobs.”

Vaguely paying attention, Donghyuck looked to his friend, eyebrows raised.

“Crazy, right? He thinks I get baby fever,” Jaemin explained, surrounding the comment in air quotes. “And apparently I take it out on his poor back. Ridiculous, right? He’s got a good back! A really nice back. Gorgeous arch.” He was salivating now. “And those shoulders? So fleshy and,” Jaemin swallowed the saliva in his mouth, “delicious.”

Donghyuck blinked. “I think he should leave you.” Bold coming from him since Renjun has been complaining about his own back thanks to Donghyuck. But could you blame him? Renjun was just so irresistible and Donghyuck was just so pathetically weak. If anything, he could sympathise with Jaemin in this regard, because now that he thought about it, he also would love to have mini-Renjuns walking around the place. 

Maybe he also had baby fever. Not that he would ever admit that - not to Jaemin at least. 

“And you’re a fucking freak.”

Jaemin gasped. “My own friend, backstabbing me like that. But whatever; are you seeing anyone?”

“What makes you think that?”

Jaemin snorted as if what Donghyuck said was somehow funny. “Oh come on; you’re practically vibrating and shaking with how much you want to leave. You have a date after? A booty call?”

“No,” Donghyuck replied. Renjun wasn’t a booty call. And technically they didn’t have a date, but Mark would be coming back over the weekend so they wanted to make the most of the little time they still had left. “I’m just… tired.”

Jaemin hummed. “Can’t sleep?”

Donghyuck swallowed, glancing down at his lunch - leftovers from yesterday’s dinner that Renjun made for them. It tasted fine, but the fact Renjun made it was enough to elevate the flavour to a five Michelin star restaurant level. 

“Something like that,” he replied, thinking of exactly how the previous night was spent. They were going through bedsheets like crazy, using that poor washing machine like a work horse. 

“You still at Mark’s place?”

Could it even be considered Mark’s to begin with? Renjun would probably argue otherwise seeing as how little his boyfriend actually stayed at his place of residence. 

“Yeah. Until the end of the week,” Donghyuck explained, feeling a hollowness at the pit of his stomach. A month went by just like that. But what a month it was. “And then it’s back to the dump,” he added with an attempt at a laugh. 

“Has it been fixed up?”

Donghyuck nodded. 

“That’s good.” 

But Donghyuck wished it was still in ruins. Just so that he had an excuse to stay longer. Even if Mark came back, what were the odds that he would actually be back? Enough for his presence to be felt? What difference would it make anyway? He would go out to work, and Donghyuck could easily take his place and be the lover he couldn’t even begin dreaming of being. 

It made Donghyuck sick to the core to think about Mark sharing the bed with Renjun - sleeping on his side - and holding Renjun as if he had the right. His knuckles went white from gripping tightly onto his spoon, imagining how Mark would so easily kiss Renjun from his delectable lips down to his throat and even further if Renjun let him. 

But Renjun wouldn’t let him. He wouldn’t. 

He said so himself. He told Donghyuck there was no use - that there was nothing left to give. Mark was sweet and charming and brimming with love, but it fell flat when it came to proving it to Renjun. Mark would probably notice anyway that Renjun wasn’t into it, left disappointed by how empty his embrace felt. Or maybe he wouldn’t, confused as to why Renjun cut Mark off before anything could start - why their kisses never went anywhere and why Renjun pulled away from every touch.

Renjun told Donghyuck that there wasn’t anyone else - that he loved him and not Mark. And just because he was giving Mark one last chance didn’t mean that he was going to drop Donghyuck for a version of Mark he knew would never exist. It was nothing more than Renjun being polite and courteous to the man he spent close to a decade with. A breakup which had been a long time coming. 

Before Jaemin could say anything else, Donghyuck’s phone vibrated. He pulled it out and unlocked it, smiling as soon as he saw Renjun’s name pop up on the screen.

Renjunnie

Went out with Chenle and he dragged me around to get food

We went for a coffee too and this place had a cheesecake that looked good

I got it for you and your simple palate

You can thank me later, loser

Seriously? Cheesecake?

The things I do for you

Got a few other slices as well

Chocolate and the like

Oh and maritozzi

A cream bun in case you had no idea

You probably didn’t

Makes your silly cheesecake look stupid

Donghyuck

You’re so cute when you pretend you don’t find me charming

Renjunnie

Eww

Just threw up in my mouth

Donghyuck

Just admit it Renjunnie

You’re madly in love with me

No shame in admitting it

Renjunnie

A lot of shame actually

But I guess I do

Love you

Donghyuck’s heart faltered, his breath hitching as he read over the two words that had popped up on his screen. It still felt surreal - like he could wake up from this sweet dream at any second. 

But it was real.

Donghyuck

I love you too

I’ll see you soon

And I’ll have my dessert then

Oh and the cheesecake too

Renjunnie

Disgusting

Donghyuck

You won’t be saying that when I eat your ass tonight

Renjun didn’t respond as soon as he did previously. However, Donghyuck saw that he was typing. It must have been quite a long message given how long he was taking. Donghyuck chuckled, watching the screen as seconds passed by without a response. At a certain point, Donghyuck thought he left Renjun completely speechless. 

Renjunnie

Don’t disappoint

Donghyuck grinned, typing his message out.

Donghyuck

Trust me, baby

I won’t

Let’s skip right to the good part when I get back, yeah?

You can sit on my face

I won’t stop until you pass out

Renjunnie

Are you at work?

Donghyuck

Yeah

Why?

Are you gonna tease me?

Renjunnie

I think you’re the one doing all the teasing

Just get back home soon

I’ll be ready for you

Donghyuck

Good

I’ll see you soon, Renjunnie

Love you

Renjunnie

Love you too

Donghyuck smiled before locking his phone, looking back up only to find Jaemin eyeing him down with full blown scepticism. It made Donghyuck stop dead in his tracks, startled and paralysed like a deer caught in headlights. Right, he wasn’t alone. He was at work during his break, sitting with Jaemin, giddy as he was making plans to fuck Renjun stupid over the phone.

Donghyuck cleared his throat.

“No booty call, you say?”

“Not at all.”

“But not dating?”

“Not dating,” Donghyuck assured. Just yet. But soon enough, he would call Renjun his. He did wonder how soon Jaemin would be able to put the dots together - from Mark and Renjun breaking up to then Renjun and Donghyuck getting together. Would he realise that the month Mark spent away was when Donghyuck and Renjun got really close, and would he suspect an affair? Honestly, knowing him, he probably would. But would he ever say anything about it? That was much harder to gauge. 

Jaemin hummed, brows furrowed. “Alright. Sure. Just don’t do anything stupid.”

He was long past that point now. 

“Yeah. Nothing stupid.”

Maybe he already knew.

Donghyuck didn’t linger on it, focusing on getting through the day instead. There wasn’t much of it left anyway, and now with something more to keep him going, Donghyuck was free soon enough. He rushed back home, walking in like he owned the place. Renjun didn’t even have a chance to greet Donghyuck before his lips were sealed with a kiss. He didn’t fight back, smiling into it, his arms snaking around Donghyuck’s shoulders. 

“Missed me?” Renjun asked once Donghyuck gave him a moment to breathe.

“Like crazy,” Donghyuck admitted, earning a giddy laughter from Renjun. “I’ve been waiting to have my dessert all day.”

Renjun chuckled, twirling a lock of Donghyuck’s hair around his lithe finger. “Oh really?”

“Really.”

The older man hummed, sucking in his lips to hide the intensity of his smile. “Where do you want it? In the kitchen? On the dining table? Couch? Or are you gonna get the bed dirty?”

Donghyuck grinned, his hands pinching Renjun’s waist playfully. “It’s only right to eat at the table,” he mused, leaning in closer, his hot breaths brushing over Renjun’s ear. “And once we’re done, we can have seconds in bed. How does that sound, baby?”

“Really good. So… are you gonna do something?”

Donghyuck didn’t respond verbally, instead, he dropped his hands lower to Renjun’s thighs. Renjun understood immediately, jumping up and wrapping his legs around Donghyuck’s waist. 

Their kiss was filled with bubbly, giddy laughter from Renjun’s side as he was carried over to the dining table only to be set down with utmost care. He leaned back, propping himself up on his elbows, eyes locked on Donghyuck hovering above him. 

“Go on then,” Donghyuck said, his eyes falling to Renjun’s lap. “You said you would be ready for me, didn’t you? So strip.”

“You’re so demanding,” Renjun teased, following orders nevertheless. He lifted his hips up and pulled down his slacks, kicking them off to the side. He didn’t need Donghyuck to tell him to take his top off either, pulling the sweater off to reveal he had nothing underneath. “After all that I’ve done for you.”

Donghyuck rolled his eyes, placing his hands on either side of Renjun’s hips, leaning forward to shut him up with a kiss. Languid and natural. It lacked urgency, simply wanting to make the most of their moment together. “All you do is complain.”

“All you do is waste time.”

Donghyuck clicked his tongue. He tried to appease Renjun, licking into his mouth, tasting the sweetness of the cakes he indulged in on his earlier trip, balanced out by a hint of bitter coffee. 

It made him want another bite, desperate to have his fill of the man beneath until he pushed Renjun fully flat on the dining table, body tensing as his bare skin made contact with the smooth and cold glass. He didn’t complain though which was a good sign, far too occupied with Donghyuck’s tongue and the press of his hot hands over his waist and chest. 

Honestly, Donghyuck wouldn’t mind coming home to this everyday. He didn’t understand how Renjun wasn’t getting fucked every single day with how irresistable he was; just one kiss and one touch were enough to frazzle Donghyuck’s brain, making him think of nothing but Renjun and how to make him see stars behind his eyes. Yet there Renjun was: denied the adoration he deserved. 

Donghyuck would fix that. He was already making a start on it, and all he needed now was Renjun to live with him instead. Only then would Renjun know what it meant to be loved completely and thoroughly. 

He could envision it perfectly in his head; Donghyuck would come home and sweep Renjun off his feet, ensuring he never was left unsatisfied. If Renjun had a long and busy day, Donghyuck would spoil him, massage him and run him a nice hot bath, and once he was loose and relaxed, Donghyuck would sweeten the deal with his mouth, giving Renjun a good start to his night, meeting his dreams utterly at peace. 

Soon.

He continued the kiss, parting from Renjun’s delectable mouth and going down along the column of his throat, lightly biting and sucking over the skin until he reached the jut of Renjun’s clavicle, pressing a heavy and lingering kiss to the tight stretch of skin. In all honesty, Donghyuck had very little patience tonight - when he knew exactly what they both wanted. He didn’t even have it in himself to be a little mean and tease Renjun, denying him of the pleasure.

Donghyuck pulled up and looked down at Renjun, the air punched out of his lungs at the ethereal portrait underneath him. If only he could frame this exact moment and hang it up above his bed.

He’d never get a wink of sleep if he did that. 

His eyes briefly flickered upwards towards the kitchen counter, finding a large white box he assumed to contain all the sweet treats Renjun brought home from his outing with Chenle. As he looked at them, he got a devilish idea, licking his lips, the residue of Renjun’s kiss piquing his appetite. 

Without warning, Donghyuck pushed himself away and started walking towards the box. Renjun whined, following Donghyuck’s movements. 

“Seriously?” Renjun asked as Donghyuck made his way over to the box, opening it up to see what was inside. “You’re going to eat now? When I’m right here?”

A slice of chocolate cake. Donghyuck’s promised cheesecake. A tart, muffin, and then the pastry Donghyuck was hoping to see. The maritozzi, stuffed to the brim with cream. Donghyuck poked it, getting some of the whipped delight on his finger. He brought it up to his lips, licking his finger clean with a satisfied hum. Sweet and rich. It would taste even better if it were licked off Renjun’s body. 

Donghyuck grabbed the bun and carried it back over to the table, earning himself a curious glance from Renjun. When Donghyuck found himself back by Renjun, he gave Renjun’s thighs a light pat, urging the man to spread his legs open for him. Renjun really was so good at following orders. 

Donghyuck slotted himself into the space between Renjun’s legs before he dropped down to his knees, guiding Renjun’s legs to rest over his shoulders. Met with the heavenly sight of Renjun’s pucker, Donghyuck salivated. All this time and he still hadn’t gotten a taste. How unfair was that? Truly unfair. But at least that was going to change right this moment.

He inched his face closer, taking in a deep breath, shuddering at the unmistakable scent of Renjun. Clean skin, a subtle body oil, and the bubbling arousal emanating off him. Donghyuck felt dizzy, his cock twitching in the restraints of his own pants. He dropped a hand down to his zipper, pulling it down and undoing his buttons. He pulled his cock out, slowly hardening in anticipation. 

With that, Donghyuck couldn’t resist any longer. He shuffled himself closer, kissing up from Renjun’s knee, going down his inner thigh, his hands spreading Renjun’s cheeks apart. 

Taking it slow wasn’t an option, and as soon as he had his chance, Donghyuck licked around the rim. Renjun hissed, thighs clenching at the sudden attention. But Donghyuck wasn’t about to stop, licking and kissing everywhere he could, sucking along Renjun’s perineum. He would gladly stay right there, finding his rightful place between Renjun’s legs, more than happy to serve and worship him just like this. 

Nothing could be better than this.

And then Donghyuck remembered the treat he brought with him from the kitchen. In a complete daze, he reached down for it all whilst keeping his mouth preoccupied with Renjun’s inner thigh, fighting with himself to not leave a mark right there for Mark to see. Not that he would ever see it because Renjun was his and only his; Mark didn’t have the permission nor right to get that close. 

But he held himself back, panting like a dog, worked up from the taste of Renjun’s soft skin. 

He pressed two fingers into the cream of the bun, groaning at the way the airy texture gave way. It was sticky and fluffy and Donghyuck couldn’t wait to cover Renjun in it. 

It came to a surprise for Renjun when he felt something cool smeared into the flesh of his thigh. Yet he didn’t question it, back arching and fingers dragging over Donghyuck’s skull as the whipped cream was worked against his skin. His thighs, ass cheek, taint, scrotum and the base of his cock, all coated in that syrupy cream that clung to the flesh. Donghyuck scooped all that there was, coating as much skin with it as he could all for him to attach his mouth onto.

He latched his mouth onto Renjun like a crazed animal, starved and unrestrained. He licked Renjun’s thighs clean first, slobbering as he sucked it all up. Renjun’s skin was left reddened from the attention, sweet no matter how many times Donghyuck ran his tongue over him. It was dizzying and Donghyuck couldn’t get enough. He moaned, gripping onto Renjun’s thighs, nails digging into the giving flesh as all he could do was devour. 

Inch by inch he got closer to where Renjun needed him, slurping up the sacrine cream from his perineum and going up to his scrotum. He sucked it clean off Renjun’s ballsack, humming as his mouth was occupied, a pleasant heavy weight on his tongue, all to then go to Renjun’s cock, licking from the base of the shaft right up to the tip. 

Renjun whimpered, muscles flexing, breathing ragged. But before Donghyuck could lose himself in sucking Renjun off, he remembered what he was there for in the first place. 

His attention dropped south and Donghyuck repositioned himself, spreading Renjun’s ass cheeks apart. He followed the sweet trail right down to Renjun’s awaiting entrance, his tongue licking over the furrowed rim, teasing the opening with just the tip. 

Renjun gasped, his hips bucking with the need to feel Donghyuck inside. It was cute. 

And Donghyuck couldn’t deny them both any longer. He pressed forward, his tongue breaching the tight enclosure of Renjun’s rim. He groaned, heat rushing right down to his cock. Renjun tasted just as sweet as Donghyuck imagined, unable to get enough of him. 

“Fuck.”

Donghyuck smirked, flicking his tongue inside. 

“Oh fuck!”

Renjun was tight, every muscle clenched as he adjusted to the strange sensation of Donghyuck’s tongue slipping inside. Whenever he thought he was getting used to it, Donghyuck proved him wrong by twirling and curling his tongue, spreading Renjun out for him. 

Every whine and moan only spurred Donghyuck on more. He didn’t care how messy he got, his spit getting everywhere as he licked and sucked, desperate to have all of Renjun for himself. He pushed further in, barely able to breath though that didn’t deter him at all - if anything, it made him crave Renjun even more, hooked on his musky scent and the tremble of his body where they were joined. 

Donghyuck’s spit trickled down the corners of his mouth and chin, dripping down onto the floor and his lap but he simply didn’t care. Renjun was so soft and wet for him, giving Donghyuck everything he ever wanted and Donghyuck wasn’t going to waste as much as a second to breathe or think or bother about how sloppy and dirty he was. Nothing mattered more than Renjun. 

He was close, too; Donghyuck could feel it in the way he breathed and the way his body shook. He could tell by the curl of his toes and the way his nails dragged over Donghyuck’s head. And Donghyuck wanted him to let go already - he needed to know how it felt to have Renjun unwind from his tongue alone. 

Eagerly, Donghyuck shifted and pushed Renjun’s legs up for better access. He held Renjun’s legs up, fucking into his with his tongue as Renjun cried and moaned. 

“Please,” he begged, voice strained and thick with lust. “Can I- can I touch-”

Donghyuck groaned, giving Renjun’s thighs a firm squeeze in response. At that, Renjun whimpered, bringing his hand towards his cock, stroking himself in rhythm to the thrust of Donghyuck’s tongue. It was chaotic and crazed, needing to finally cross the finish line before he lost his mind. And it didn’t take him much longer, gasping as he saw the end behind his eyes. 

With one last thrust and stroke, Renjun was done, crying out and high, squirming and shaking as he spilled all over his chest, coating himself in hot ropes of white. 

Donghyuck didn’t stop. He didn’t stop even as Renjun started to whimper from overstimulation, babbling as the strength was zapped out of him. But Donghyuck couldn’t stop no matter how hard he tried. And Renjun didn’t push him off. Renjun let him go at it even as he was sobbing and gasping for air, too high on the feeling to put Donghyuck’s frenzy to an end. 

Donghyuck was ravenous, cock throbbing and neglected. He reached down for it, stroking himself furiously, still unable to pry himself off Renjun. Nothing could get him to pull away, savouring every gasp and choked cry coming from Renjun. It brought him to his own orgasm, shoulders slouching and shaking with the overwhelming weight of it.

And still, it wasn’t enough. Hands coated in his own release, Donghyuck was insatiable. He only offered Renjun a moment of relief when he pulled his tongue out of Renjun’s ass, opting to kiss his quivering thighs instead. Thinking he was finally free, Renjun exhaled, his entire body relaxing. But that relief only lasted a mere second before Donghyuck slipped two cum coated fingers right back inside. 

Renjun’s entire back lifted up from the table, sharp and abrupt to the point Donghyuck worried he might snap in half like that. 

“Donghyuck!”

“I’m sorry, baby,” Donghyuck murmured into the heated skin of Renjun’s thigh. “I can’t stop. You drive me crazy like this. Is this fine?” He pressed his fingers upwards, pushing up against the tight walls. “I don’t know if I should fuck you with my cock or tongue again. What do you want?”

Renjun squirmed, seeking purchase, gripping onto the edge of the table like his life depended on it. 

“I promised you my tongue, didn’t I? But fuck… Jaemin said something at work and now- now I don’t know,” Donghyuck continued. “You think if I try hard enough I could get you pregnant?”

Renjun moaned as Donghyuck thrust his fingers in hard. 

“Just imagine: we could have the whole block looking like you.”

Another curl of his fingers. In and out, in and out. 

Renjun was getting hard again, his breathing ragged and utterly broken. Yet he didn’t beg Donghyuck to stop. He simply took it like he wanted it. 

“You-” Renjun moaned, hips bucking, “need to stop- hanging out with- Jaemin.”

“He’s not that bad,” Donghyuck mused. “But you didn’t answer my question, Renjunnie: do you want my cock or tongue?” Again, he thrust hard into Renjun’s soft opening, copious spit fucked out of him. “Hmm?”

“Cock,” Renjun gasped out. “Want- want your cock.”

Donghyuck smirked. “Needy, aren’t you?”

“Fuck you.”

That earned a hearty laugh out of Donghyuck. “I’m down for that. Right now though?”

“Shut up.”

“That’s rude, Renjunnie. You should try being nicer if you want me to fuck you.”

Renjun whined, weakly giving Donghyuck a kick. 

“Oh look at you getting all feisty,” Donghyuck teased. “I can stop if that’s what you really want.” With that, he retracted his hand, leaving Renjun clenching around nothing, a pathetic whine passing his lips. “No? You’re giving me mixed signals here, baby.”

“You-” Renjun swallowed, struggling to speak as it was. “Bedroom. Now.”

“So bossy.”

“Donghyuck.”

Donghyuck straightened his back, a chill running down his spine. “Ah… Yes, right, Renjunnie. Let’s get you to bed, hmm?” He hauled himself up, finally getting a good look at the state Renjun was in after his endless teasing. Renjun was flushed, his skin a gorgeous pink, chest coated with his release. His cock was already twitching with want despite his overstimulation, pushed to the brink only to still crave more. 

Donghyuck wouldn’t go easy on him at all. Not when he knew Renjun could take a lot. 

“Bed?”

Renjun extended his arms, silently asking for Donghyuck to carry him. Maybe Donghyuck should take up Jaemin’s offer to join him in the gym some time soon; after all, he needed to carry his spoiled and pampered Renjun around from now on - especially after fucking him to the point his knees went weak. 

Donghyuck pulled Renjun up and managed to get him comfortable in his arms. “Alright then,” he said, steady on his own two feet. “Bed it is.”

“Less talking, more walking.”

“Yes, your highness.”

Renjun snorted, pressing a kiss to Donghyuck’s cheek. “You’re stupid.”

“If you say so, your highness.”

The walk to the bedroom was accompanied with laughter, continued further once they were back in bed with Renjun spread out and wanting beneath Donghyuck. Despite both being needy, they didn’t jump straight to fucking like the crazed animals they were, opting to kiss each other breathless instead. Although that didn’t last too long before Renjun was pulling Donghyuck in, swallowing him up, welcoming Donghyuck as if that was exactly where he belonged.

“Mine,” Renjun uttered, velvety walls encompassing Donghyuck’s length. 

“Yours.”

♡♡♡

Unfortunately, all good things have to come to an end. 

Saturday night was their last true moment of peace before Mark returned. 

Donghyuck dreaded it, even though he knew that the separation wouldn’t last long anyway. Even if Renjun and Mark didn’t break up right away, he could still have Renjun to himself. It’s not as if Mark - oh the ever sweet and naive Mark - would think his boyfriend and best friend are having an affair right behind his back.

“What time is he coming?” Donghyuck asked, laying face to face with Renjun, his arms thrown over the older man’s waist to keep him close. 

“His flight gets in at seven,” Renjun replied. “He said he doesn’t need me to come pick him up since it’s early.”

Donghyuck hummed. That gave them just a few more hours together in the morning. 

“He’s gonna want me out as soon as possible, isn’t he?”

Renjun chuckled. “He won’t say it,” he stated. “And he might honestly be fine with you sticking around for a bit, but that would be…”

“Awkward,” Donghyuck finished. 

“Yeah.”

Donghyuck exhaled. “That’s fine; I’ll leave as soon as he comes. I’ll be packed up by then.” Not that he really had much to pack anyway. “He’s gonna want you all to himself.”

“Yeah.”

That sinking feeling in his stomach again.

“Will you-”

“No,” Renjun interrupted, answering Donghyuck before the question could even come out of his mouth. “I won’t. I- There’s nothing left there, and I know he won’t push it if I say no.”

Feeling miniscule relief, Donghyuck exhaled, his hand stroking Renjun’s waist and lower back. “Don’t do anything you don’t want to.”

“I won’t. I’ve done enough of that now. And I have you now.”

Donghyuck smiled, humming in agreement. “You have me. Always.”

“You promise?”

“I promise,” Donghyuck replied, sealing it with a kiss.

♡♡♡

They woke up early just so that they could savour every moment together. An early rise, both men groggy and tired but desperate to feel as much as they could of each other. Needing a pick-me-up they took a shower together, the water reinvigorating them up enough to not drag their feet as they got dressed and got out of the bedroom. Renjun made a start on the coffee whilst Donghyuck packed up his things, making sure he didn’t leave anything in Renjun’s bedroom that could be too incriminating. 

Renjun greeted him with a freshly brewed coffee, standing around in the kitchen, wearing a pair of shorts (which sadly went below the knees) and one of Donghyuck’s old hoodies, the text on the front faded and chipping off, yet Donghyuck refused to get rid of it since he had it for so long and it was comfortable. Even Mark thought it was time to let it go. Still, Donghyuck was stubborn and refused to throw it away.

They didn’t have time nor energy to do much else other than sit around together, cuddling and kissing until Renjun’s phone vibrated with the much dreaded message from Mark.

“He’s landed.”

It wouldn’t be long now. 

Donghyuck had to keep reminding himself that this was just temporary - that Renjun and Mark would break up sooner than later, and then he would have Renjun completely to himself, guilt free. No affairs, no secrets, just the two of them happy as they should be. It was a long time coming, but they both needed this. 

Just a bit longer.

“It won’t be more than a month,” Renjun muttered under his breath. 

A month still felt like eternity, but what was it in comparison to eight painful years spent pining and yearning for a man he thought he couldn’t have? Merely a blink.

“Then I’m all yours.”

“Then you’re mine.”

Hopeful. 

Donghyuck had faith. He had to have faith that Renjun wouldn’t falter - that the years he spent with Mark wouldn’t sway his judgement one way, leaving Donghyuck stranded again. He had to believe that Renjun would put an end to the relationship which - whilst secure and safe - meant nothing to him anymore. It was a hollow husk of what it once was, and even then, it wasn’t much to begin with. All because Donghyuck was too scared to ask Renjun first. 

Every passing minute weighed down on them, crushing them until at last, the doors opened. 

Neither Renjun nor Donghyuck moved, both glued to the couch, too heavy to get up.

“Baby, I’m home,” Mark called out. “Baby, you up yet?”

Renjun exhaled, finally making a move. “Yeah. Just in the living room.”

Mark closed the door, dragging his suitcase over and leaving it in the hallway where he kicked off his shoes and shimmied out of his jacket. He stepped into the living room, eyes wide and a smile plastered across his face, clearly glad to be back. However, when his eyes landed on Donghyuck on the couch with Renjun, Mark seemed surprised. 

“Oh, Hyuck,” Mark uttered. “You’re still here.”

“Dissappointed?”

Mark chuckled, shaking his head. “That’s not it. Just didn’t expect you to also be up this early.”

Donghyuck put on a thin smile, hoping that it came across as genuine. “Well, somebody had to greet you. You know how much of a sleepyhead Renjun is; it’s a miracle he’s up this early.”

“Hey!”

Mark laughed, nodding in agreement. “He does need his beauty sleep, don’t you, baby?”

“What are you insinuating?”

“Nothing, baby,” Mark assured. “Now come here, I missed you.” With his arms open, Mark waited for Renjun to come greet him like he was meant to: with a kiss and hug. At least that was what loving couples would do. But Renjun hesitated. Yet in the end he still got up, allowing Mark to wrap his arms around him. One hand dropped down to Renjun’s ass, giving it a light squeeze, the sight of which made Donghyuck feel sick, anger and jealousy clouding his vision. 

Thankfully, when Mark tried to go for a kiss, he was denied, only offered up Renjun’s cheek. He laughed it off as Renjun being his usual teasing self, but Donghyuck knew what it truly meant. Only he was allowed to kiss Renjun - just like he did before Mark arrived. 

Would Mark be able to taste him on Renjun’s tongue if he did manage to kiss him? Would he even be able to tell the difference?

“I should- I should probably go,” Donghyuck said, interrupting the awkward moment between the couple. “Leave you two lovebirds to it. You must be tired from the flight too.”

“I’ve gotten used to it.”

Donghyuck hummed, his smile weak and meaningless. “Still, I’ve probably overstayed my welcome.”

“Hey, you know we’re always happy to have you. Isn’t that right, Renjun?”

Donghyuck and Renjun exchanged glances - a dangerous thing to do given Mark’s presence. Just their eyes alone could give away far too much. 

“Yeah,” Renjun replied. “You’re always welcome.”

“How was it anyway? Did you guys get up to much? No fighting?”

“Just a bit of fighting,” Renjun replied.

Mark squeezed Renjun’s waist. “You didn’t make Donghyuck’s life hard, did you?”

“Not at all,” Donghyuck replied. “We had fun, didn’t we?”

“Yeah. Fun.”

“Well, I’m glad to hear that! The guestroom was fine, wasn’t it? The mattress and all that.”

“Perfectly fine,” Donghyuck assured, his stomach tying into knots. He barely used that bed, but he didn’t lie either: it was fine. “Anyway I- I won’t take up more of your time now. I’ll just get my stuff.”

“Sure. Cool. Glad you stayed over.”

“Me too.”

Donghyuck went to grab his suitcase where he left it, wheeling it over back to the open living area. Mark and Renjun were still standing around together with Mark cuddling up to Renjun, face nestled against Renjun’s shoulder all whilst Renjun kept a noticeable distance between their bodies. That didn’t happen when Donghyuck held him. 

Were Mark and Renjun always this awkward?

Their eyes met once Donghyuck returned.

“I’ll walk you out,” Renjun announced, stepping away from Mark who very clearly wanted to keep holding Renjun. Still, Mark let him go. “Come on.”

Donghyuck nodded, dragging his suitcase with him. 

He put his shoes and jacket on and stepped outside as Renjun stood in the doorway. They didn’t say anything, simply looking at each other. What was there left to say anyway?

“I… I had fun,” Donghyuck said.

“Yeah, me too.”

This felt ridiculous after everything that happened. They weren’t supposed to part like this.

“You can come over to my place any time you want,” Donghyuck stated. “It’s not as fancy as your place but umm… You know.”

“I know. And the same goes for you.”

Donghyuck hummed, glancing down at his feet. It felt like they were somehow going backwards. Yet Renjun was looking at him, whispering so only they could hear, drowning in Donghyuck’s faded hoodie. This was further than they ever dared to go before. 

“Run away with me,” Donghyuck suggested.

Renjun chuckled, leaning his head against the edge of the door. “Okay, now you’re just being stupid.”

“I’m being serious.”

“I know. But there’s no need,” Renjun assured. “I promise.”

He had to believe. 

Donghyuck looked through the gap of the door, peering over Renjun’s shoulder. Nobody was there. Mark wasn’t watching. He had no reason to watch. Which is why Donghyuck did something stupid and reckless and brave. Something he had to do or else it would eat him alive until the next time he got to see Renjun. 

He reached for the drawstrings of the hoodie, yanking on them so that Renjun leaned forward. With that, he pressed their lips in a last, secret kiss. A kiss which Renjun dared to deepen, his tongue licking into Donghyuck’s mouth, desperate and aching for more, dreading the separation. 

But they had to pull away.

It was painful, but they had to.

Breathless, they looked at each other, hearts racing. 

“I love you,” Donghyuck whispered, the confession heavy.

“I love you too.”

Donghyuck believed it.