Archive of Our Own

Robby remembered a lot of firsts in his life. His first time riding a bike, his first kiss, his first heartbreak.

He have had many firsts in his many years alive.

And as he sat in a dirty gas station bathroom on a horrendously sticky toilet lid he was experiencing a first yet again.

Staring at the tiny stick in his trembling hands, waiting for an answer that he didn't really know what to feel about yet.

He gnawed on the side of his bottom lip as he nervously rubbed his neck with his other hand.

His eyes locked on the stick's little display.

Robby's heart was beating erratically, like it was gonna burst out of his chest at any second.

He had been very careful all his life, no sex without condoms even when he was on the pill.

But as he grew older he had really thought there was no chance of him getting knocked up anymore so he stopped taking the pill.

Also him and Jack had been together for so long now that it felt ridiculous to keep buying condoms.

Suddenly the display came to life, showing the result.

Pregnant

"Oh shit…" Robby huffed out, he slipped his hand over his mouth.

Okay, so he had gotten himself pregnant at Fifty-four…

Great.

He sighed as he began to rub at his forehead anxiously.

What was he gonna do?

Get rid of it?

The thought made something in him feel uneasy.

Not that getting an abortion was wrong, it wasn't that.

No. It was more a feeling of 'don't waste this' and 'this is your last chance'.

Robby took a steadying breath, laying the stick down on the dirty sink and roughly rubbed his hand over his face.

Tears started to well up in his eyes, he hugged his arm around himself tightly.

His whole life had wanted a kid, he had thought about adoption or maybe fostering. But time got away from him.

He had been content with being a father figure for Jake but he wasn't talking to him after the disaster that was Pittfest.

And as he sat there on the dirty toilet lid the thought of a little kid with Jack's red hair running around in his home. His heart clench with want.

He swallowed down the lump that had started to form in his throat and stood up.Wiped his hands on his pants before picking the pregnancy test up.

Feeling and thoughts surged through him as he stared at it.

Was he really going to go through with this?

Was he even willing to go through with it?

Was he gonna have to go through this alone if Jack didn't want this?

Robby pocketed the stick as he exhaled shakily.

FIRST PERSON HE TOLD

(WEEK 6)

He didn't mean to tell Jack right away, really.

But when Robby came home from the gas station and Jack had waited for him by the kitchen table with a soft and gentle smile on his lips, he got an overwhelming feeling that he needed to tell him.

"Hey." Jack greeted and glanced back at his computer, his glasses had slid down halfway down his nose.

Robby slowly made his way the table and plopped down on the chair opposite his husband.

Robby bit down on his lip as he contemplated on how to tell him.

The pregnancy test jabbed uncomfortably in his pocket.

He slid his hand down into his pocket, his fingers gripping the stick tightly and swallowed nervously.

"Gas didn't cost too much, right?" Jack asked, without looking away from the screen.

Robby pulled the test out of his pocket but held it out of sight under the table.

He cleared his throat, "No, it wasn't too bad. The usual." He answered in a slightly shaky voice.

Jack snapped his eyes to him immediately.

"What's wrong?"

Robby shook his head, "Nothing… Why would there be something wrong?"

The other man tilted his head to the side and raised his brow.

"Mikey." He said, his voice soft and filled with concern.

Robby sighed quietly.

Fuck it…

He laid the pregnancy test in the middle of the table then hugged both his arms around himself.

His heart began to beat rapidly as tears started to well up in his eyes yet again.

Jack's brow furrowed in confusion, closing the computer and pushing it to the side.

He reached his forward and picked the test up, pulling it closer so he could see what it said.

His eyes softened, he slowly looked up at Robby.

"It's yours?" He asked in a soft hushed voice.

Robby bit on his bottom lip and gave him a faint nod.

"What do you wanna do?" Jack asked gently, his eyes full of understanding and love.

The tears that had welled up began to fall from his eyes, running down his cheeks then into his beard.

He glanced down at his lap, still hugging himself.

"I–I think I want to…" He stuttered out before clearing his throat and glancing up at the other man.

"I think I want to keep it." He said firmly.

Jack's eyes became somewhat shiny, he pursed his lips as he was trying to keep his feeling in check. He slowly pushed the chair back, taking his time as he stood up and made his way around the table.

His slightly trembling hands took hold of Robby's tear streaked face, as he was made of the most fragilest of glass.

Robby could help the soft sob that broke loose from his throat at the action.

Jack's gentle thumbs wiping away the fresh tears that made their way down his cheek.

"I wanna keep it." Robby repeated meekly.

Jack gave him a gentle smile as he looked down at him, "Yeah?"

Robby nodded stiffly as Jack's hands held his face in place.

"Yeah… are you okay with that?" Robby squeaked out, licking his lips anxiously.

Jack huffed out a chuckle, "Yea', of course."

Robby nodded and let out a deep breath he didn't know he was holding in.

His head started to flood with concerns and worries.

"I gotta get healthy…" He muttered, running his hand through his hair, "It's a big chance I'll miscarry. This is already such a high-risk pregnancy with my age and I'm not gonna fuck this up… I gotta stop T and get prenatal vitamins!" He rambled all while Jack just smiled down at him with a grin.

Jack started to laugh, it wasn't malicious, it was more light and giddy like he couldn't contain his happiness.

Robby stopped his rambling and glared at him, "What?" He huffed out.

Jack lifted Robby's face up so that he could lean down and bring him into a kiss.

FIRST TIME HEARING THE BABY'S HEARTBEAT

(WEEK 14)

The day shift was moving at the usual fast pace.

Robby had been keeping up with it, running at his usual rhythm from case to to case and room to room, procedure to procedure.

He was observing inside trauma two, watching closely as the residents and interns ran the trauma, ready to step in and help at any moment.

The patient was brought in unconscious and when they tried to wake him up, the man had snapped his eyes open.

Looked at around the room with his wild and confused eyes, and before anyone could react, he lunged at Samira.

Without thinking, Robby threw himself in between her and the patient.

The agitated man shoved him to the side and suddenly his feet didn't work properly, the world tilted to the side and with a loud dull 'boom' everything went black.

Slowly voices started to come from everywhere, he felt his body being maneuvered and lifted.

"—obby?! Dr. Robby, can you hear me?!" He heard someone ask loudly and a terribly bright light suddenly came into his eye.

I'm fine. He wanted to say but it came out more like groan.

He felt himself move, sounds coming from everywhere and nowhere all at once.

A groan slipped out of him again.

"Dr. Robby? You with us?" Somebody said, he frowned. No, not somebody, Samira.

He hummed, squinting his eyes as he tried to open them.

"… Yea'" He mumbled, reaching his hand up to rub at his head but a firm hand took his arm before he got the chance.

His frown deepened, glancing at the hand, following the arm to the person it was attached to.

The stern eyes of Dana meet his.

"Let's get you to CT, bud." She declared.

Robby groaned, "I don't need a CT." He argued as Samira was about to take look at his head.

The charge nurse scoffed, "Yes, you do. You know you do!"

"It's just a bump to the head! We don't need to waste time and resources." He tried to argue back, wincing a little as Samira's fingers found a bump on his head.

Dana just shook her head at him and looked towards the resident, "Make sure he doesn't make a run for it." She warned, turning to leave.

Robby let out grumble, crossing his arms across his chest.

The CT had gone surprisingly quickly.

But if Robby had to guess, he had gotten VIP treatment by strict orders from Dana.

He was back in the Pitt, in a room. Which Robby felt like was a bit excessive and unnecessary, they shouldn't be wasting a bed on him.

It was just a bump to the head.

He let out a sigh, closing his eyes.

He could at least try to get a little rest during the wait for his CT results.

After a little while a faint cramp seizing through his abdomen, then a sluggish wet feeling in his underwear.

Robby snapped his eyes open.

His heart started to pick up speed, the monitor beside him began to beep faster. Breathing was beginning to feel more and more difficult.

Was he miscarrying?

Panic clawed at him, his eyes darted around the room helplessly.

He had to get to a bathroom, he really needed to check his underwear.

Without thinking he sat up, throwing his legs down to the side. He ripped off his pulse ox and wires in haste.

His back was to the door but he heard it squeak open.

"Hey! Hey! What do you think you're doing, mister?" Dana's gruff and firm voice sounded from behind his back.

Robby snapped his wild eyes to her, he slammed his mouth shut and tried to calm his breathing down through his nose.

"I–I need the bathroom." He stuttered out, sneaking an arm around his middle.

"Use the bedpan." She huffed, moving the side he was sitting on.

Robby felt tears beginning to form in his eyes, he bit his bottom lip hard as an uncomfortable lump started to lodge in his throat.

Dana frowned at the sight of him, her eyes softening.

He hesitated for a beat.

"I–I think I'm having a–a miscarriage…" He muttered out, his voice cracking. His arm tightened around his middle, "I'm cramping… a–and I felt something—" He gestured to his lower region, "—down there."

She mouth fell open in shock, her eyes grew wide.

"Oh… shit." She uttered, laying a hand on his shoulder. "Let's take one step at a time… L–let's just take a look to see if you are bleeding then an ultrasound."

Robby faintly nodded, trying to swallow down the lump in his throat. He carefully stood up with a little help from Dana.

She took the gown that laid by the end of the gurney, the gown that Robby had flat out refused to wear earlier, and unfolded it.

Dana held it so that it was covering him. He took an unsteady breath before beginning to unbuckle his belt with trembling fingers.

Pulling down his pants and underwear just enough to take a peak.

His underwear was stained with red.

Robby whimpered, looking away and covering his mouth with his hand.

"Hey, hey…" Dana soothed, "Don't jump to any conclusions."

He shook his head, a pitiful sound slipping out his throat. He tried to pull up his pants with his other hand but it was shaking too much.

Dana stepped forward, helping him pull them up and led him back onto the bed. She gave his shoulder a comforting squeeze and leaned down to catch his eye.

"Don't jump to ant conclusions." She repeated in a firmer tone, "We don't know anything til we do an ultrasound."

But Robby felt that that it was little to no hope left, he had lost the baby.

He scooted back on the bed, swinging his legs up on it and stared up at the ceiling. The tears in his eyes threatened to fall but he wouldn't let them fall, biting his quivering lip as hard as he could.

His arms hugging around his stomach tightly as he tried to breathe normally and not give into the pure despair that was crawling up from the pit of his belly.

The charge nurse reattached all the wires and the pulse ox, then patted his arm gently.

"I'll be back in a moment." She assured him with a tone that he'd only heard her use on patients.

Robby stiffly gave her a nod, his lip trembled between his teeth. He closed his eyes and focused on his breathing.

The door closed with a soft click, leaving him all alone with his thoughts.

An overwhelming feeling of sorrow washed over him.

He hugged himself tighter. Without warning, a sob ripped it's way out of him.

He lost the baby…

This was his last chance and he blew it.

The door opened again.

Robby quickly wiped away the tears on his face with a clumsy hand, sniffing sharply. He glanced over towards the door.

Dana held open the door as Santos pushed an ultrasound machine into the room.

Robby sighed, putting his arms to the side.

"I've paged OB, said it was pronto. Didn't tell them it was you but I told them it was one of our own." Dana said, helping Santos set up the machine.

He nodded wearily.

It felt pointless to do the ultrasound, he had lost the baby.

Couldn't they spare him having to see? Spare him from the embarrassment of totally losing his composure in front of another resident?

He took a deep breath and closed his eyes, the tears burned as they silently slipped out.

"Could you lift up your shirt, please?" Santos asked, her voice was a little unsure.

Robby lifted up his scrub top and the shirt underneath in one go, readjusting himself so that he could move it up far enough.

The gel was cool against his warm skin, but he didn't care.

He felt numb.

Santos put the wand on his lower belly and brought it back and forth as she applied some pressure.

Robby felt the lump in his throat pushing it's way further up, he bit his lip trying not to let it all out.

He felt Dana's soft and warm hand on his arm, trying to give him some comfort.

Then he heard the faint click of a button and suddenly the room was filled with a quick and soft whooshing sound.

Robby's face crumbled, the rough sob he had been holding in ripped it's way out. His hands came up to cover his face as sob after sob teared out of him.

Dana's hand rubbed his arm as she shushed him softly, "See, your little green bean there is fine." She muttered.

He nodded, fully sobbing his heart out.

"I'll go check on OB, okay? I'll be back in a few." Dana said, giving his arm a squeeze.

He roughly wiped his face, panting slightly but gave her another nod. Dana glanced over at the resident and pointed a finger at her.

"You, stay here."

Santos gave her a mock salute, wiping the gel off of Robby's belly.

He closed his eyes and let himself just feel the relief. He lifted a hand up to his stomach, gently caressing it as the tears flowed down his face as his breath hitched.

Robby then felt smaller fingers clutch his other hand, he turned his head. His resident gave him a tentative smile.

"Do you want me to call someone?" She asked, her grip tightening for a moment.

She was worried, although she would never admit that.

But he had spent enough time with her to know her signs.

He cleared his throat. Jack was probably asleep right now, he really didn't want to wake him up. But then the thought of not having him here hit him… No, he wanted Jack. He needed him here.

Robby gave her a tiny nod, pointing with the hand that was not in hers towards the side table behind her.

"M–my phone…"

Santos glanced to where he was pointing and let go of his hand, reaching for the phone.

"The code is one, nine, seven, five." He muttered, sniffing a little. "Call… Jack."

Her eyes widen for a second but shook herself out of it, tapping at the phone.

She put the phone to her ear and gave him another small smile.

Robby heard the phone signals echo then a sharp click and some mumbling.

"Hi, Dr. Abbot. This is Dr. Santos." She answered awkwardly.

He heard some more mumbling from the other end.

"Yeah… I— erm… R–Robby got attacked by a patient earlier and took a bump to the head." She looked to him and raised her brow in question, nodding to his middle.

His eyes softened in realization.

She didn't want to out his pregnancy in case Jack didn't know. He gave her an approving nod.

"He's spotting a little and we're getting OB down soon but the ultrasound looks good and the baby has a steady heartbeat."

She hummed to whatever Jack was saying back, "Yeah." She mumbled then looked to Robby, "He wants to talk to you."

He hummed, giving her another nod and held out his shaking hand. She gave him his phone with a little frown.

Robby sniffed again, putting it to his ear.

"Hi…" He muttered, his voice was shaky and unstable.

"Hey, baby." Jack cooed gently.

Robby's chin started to quiver at his tone.

"I'll be there as soon as I can. I'm out the door in a minute." He said out of breath. Robby could hear the rustling of clothes.

Guilt swiveled in his stomach.

"I'm sorry…" Robby sobbed out.

"What are you sorry for? You couldn't help this." Jack said, firmly.

Robby hugged his other arm around his chest, "No… I'm sorry I woke you up." He mumbled, tears in his voice.

He heard the jingle of keys then a deep sigh.

"Baby…" Jack grumbled, "You can call me anytime. Asleep or not, day or night." He assured in a gentle tone.

Robby gnawed on his lip, "… Okay." He muttered back.

"Now, Santos is going to stay with you til I'm there. You take it easy and call me if anything changes." Jack informed, "I mean it, Michael. Anything."

"I–I will." Robby's voice cracked as he answered.

"I love you, see you soon." Jack cooed softly.

It brought a smile to Robby's face, "Love you too." He whispered and hanged up the phone.

Santos took the phone from his hand and laid it back on the side table then slipped her hand into his again, squeezing it.

"You'll be alright, kid." She said with a soft smile on her face and tears in her eyes.

Robby gave her a teary smile back.

FIRST TIME HE NOTICED HIS BUMP

(WEEK 19)

Robby woke up to warmth against his face, he tried to open his eyes but was hit with the morning sun right in his face. Although somewhat muted by the almost see through curtains, it still was a little too bright for his newly awake eyes.

“Mmmmpf…” Robby sounded as he stretched out horizontally, like a cat. Pushing his face into the pillow forcefully in the process.

He had a wonderful dream, he couldn't remember a thing about it but the warm feeling of it still lingered.

He sighed happily and glanced to Jack's side of the bed, it was empty. The curtains caught his attention instead as they lightly flowed, the fan by the foot of the bed blew it gently as it steadily rotated back and forth. 

The soft and annoying morning alarm from his phone began to play it's jingle and he couldn't help but to let out a groan.

With clumsy hands he reached for his phone. Shutting it off with a tap.

He was going back to work today after the incident a few weeks ago. His OB had put him on bed rest for a while and had basically ordered him to take some time off work too if he wanted to keep this baby.

Robby rubbed his hands over his face and sat up, swinging his legs over the side of the bed.

The cold ground on his warm bare feet made him wake up some more. He stood up and stretched again, his hands up in the air over his head. He yawned a drawn out yawn, letting his hand slip down and scratched his hairy stomach lightly.

He really wanted coffee…

A groan slipped out of him at the thought. He really missed coffee.

Yes, there was decaf but it tasted off to him.

He staggered towards the door, taking the robe off the hangar on the door and slipping into it before making his way out towards the bathroom.

Swiftly switching on the light before flipping open the lid on toilet and sitting down, moving the robe so that he didn't sit down on it.

Another sigh came out of him as he relieved himself.

He reached out and took a good amount of paper, cleaning himself up and sat up, pulling up his boxers and closed the lid. Pressing the flush button before going to wash his hands.

Robby turned off the faucet and glanced up into the mirror, he actually looked well rested for once.

When he was done, he made his way to the kitchen and started to whip up an easy breakfast.

Just scrambled eggs and one of those green smoothies Jack had convinced him to drink every morning.

He ate in silence as he read an article that Jack had sent him a few days ago then after putting the dishes into the dishwasher, he walked back to bedroom to get dressed.

He slipped out of robe and hanged it back up on the hangar, taking off the underwear he had been sleeping in and tossed them into the laundry basket.

Robby went over to the dresser and pulled out a fresh pair, quickly putting them on then made his way to their closet.

Without really looking he just pulled out the pair of cargos that laid on the top of his pant pile, putting them on.

As he was about to button them up, he found himself unable to. He stopped and looked down.

They weren't this hard to put on a few weeks ago.

He tried again.

Robby sucked in his stomach and he got the button into the hole, he zipped the zipper up quickly and let out the breathe he'd been holding.

Slowly he caressed his hand over his belly, looking down at it.

Was he beginning to show?

He put his other hand on his belly as well, holding it as he frowned.

"Mike?" Jack's voice resonated through the house.

Without looking up from his middle he shouted back, "In here!"

" Well, hello." Jack's voice came from the doorway.

Robby glanced up at him. Jack was leaning on the doorframe with his arms crossed over his chest, his scrubs was rumbled and he looked tired but still a sly grin was plastered on his face. Robby rolled his eyes at him and nodded to his middle.

"Am I crazy or am I starting to show?" He asked, removing his hands to show him.

Jack pushed off the doorframe and moved closer, reaching out to put his hand on his belly.

His hands were soft and gentle as he smooth them over the little bump, his gaze locked in on it as he did.

"Yea'… I think so." Jack muttered, the sly grin melted away into something softer. He looked up at Robby and leaned his face closer, pressing a tender kiss onto his lips.

A sigh escaped Robby as he promptly kissed back, letting his hands travel up to Jack's neck.

Jack's hands were still on his tiny bump, caressing softly as he brought the kiss deeper.

Robby just let himself get lost in the moment before he remembered that he needed to get dressed and get to work.

He hummed as he broke their kiss, "I need to go to work." He panted.

Jack leaned his head down, planting his face into his neck and hummed, "You can be late…" He tried to argue, placing a soft kiss on his neck. Robby let out a chuckle.

The other man just continued to plant kisses on his neck with a soft hum, as his hands caressed non stop over his fuzzy belly.

"I can't " Robby said firmly.

"C'mon…" He tried with a whine, mumbling into his neck.

Robby couldn't help to let another chuckle, "What's got you so excited?" He asked with a smile.

The other's hands stilled, cupping the little bump.

"My sexy husband is half naked in our bedroom." Jack purred, placing a few more kisses, "And he's looking real good—" He nipped at Robby's neck, "—now that you can see I've knocked him up." He almost growled.

Robby felt himself get a little aroused but he knew they didn't have time for a quickie.

He let out a groan, pushing the other man away slightly.

"I really have to go." He said, cupping Jack's face with his hands.

Jack grumbled loudly and pouted.

Robby let out a giggle and pulled his face close, placing a soft kiss on his cheek. "I promise to make up for it when I get home, okay?" He cooed, giving his husband a pointed look.

Jack answered with a frustrated hum.

FIRST TIME SOMEONE ELSE NOTICED

(WEEK 21)

He had been taking it a little easier the last couple of weeks, cutting his hours down and tried to stress less.

Actually leaning on his staff for once.

Robby had been spending more time off his feet, sitting by the central hub and charting. But of course he was still moving around some but he was more mindful of taking breaks, especially when the watchful eyes of the charge nurse came his way.

Today he felt like had been keeping off his feet a good amount, he felt the restlessness crawling under his skin a little.

He scanned the hub for Dana, she was nowhere in sight so he stood up slowly and swiftly sneaked away.

Robby walked by some of the rooms, glancing in to check if any of his doctors needed him.

He saw Samira with a med student in one room, Javadi in another, they looked like they didn't need any help.

Then he went by one room, inside was an older woman with a nervous looking Whitaker.

He opened the door and peaked his head in.

"Hey…"

Whitaker snapped his attention to him.

"Dr. Robby!" He exclaimed, his hands tightening around the tablet.

Robby slipped inside, gently closing the door. He gave the patient a warm smile, "Hi, I'm Dr. Robby." He introduced himself.

Then he turned to the younger doctor and moved closer.

"You okay?" He asked, he noticed the older woman staring at him especially his middle.

Whitaker nodded shakily, "Y–yeah! Why do you ask?"

Robby side eyed the woman before looking back at him, "Erm, you looked a little on edge." He answered with a shrug.

"Oh—! I was just a little… urm… thrown off by Mrs. Davis comment." Whitaker explained, his face turning red as he looked down at the floor.

Robby raised his brows.

"I'm so sorry…" Mrs. Davis said, catching Robby's gaze. "Are you perchance pregnant?" She asked.

His mouth fell open as he looked at her a little thrown off and flabbergasted.

He glanced over at the younger man, Whitaker's eyes were wide as saucers. Robby hadn't told anyone at work except Dana and Santos, and of course Jack.

"I–I'm terribly sorry if you aren't—" She began.

Robby shook his head a little, "I—erm… yes." He answered, tilting his head to the side in confusion.

Mrs. Davis smiled, laying a hand over her heart, "Oooh! That is so wonderful! My younger son was pregnant just a little while back, he has a beautiful little baby boy now!"

A startled laugh bubbled out of Robby, he rubbed his hand on his neck.

"I'm sorry, it's this is just so surreal." He apologized, gesturing with his hand.

The older woman just gave him a softer more understanding smile, "I get that. I wouldn't think you were pregnant before my boy got pregnant."

Robby's eyes widened, he heard Whitaker inhale sharply.

"Now when I saw that belly of yours… I just knew that wasn't a beer belly, you look just like my son did when he was around four or five months along." She explained.

A loud knock on the glass door made them all snap their heads to the towards it.

Dana stood with her hand on her hips, giving Robby a stern look before opening the door.

"What do you think you're doing?" She huffed out.

"Oops…" Robby muttered.

"Were you even needed?" She asked, glancing over at Whitaker.

Robby hanged his head, "No…"

She snapped her fingers and pointed towards the hub, "Get your ass back to the desk."

He gave a nod to the patient and the younger doctor, backing away towards the door. He followed Dana back to the hub and sat down at his desk with a grunt.

Robby had only been back at the desk for about fifteen minutes when Whitaker came over, leaning on the counter right by him.

"I–I didn't know you were a seahorse dad." He said, looking down at his hands as he nervously fidgeted with his fingers.

Robby gave him a confused look, his brows furrowing tightly.

"A 'what' dad?"

Whitaker chuckled a little, "A seahorse dad, a trans man who's pregnant." He explained.

"Ah…" Robby said as the penny dropped in his head.

The younger man gave him a nervous smile, clearing his throat.

"I actually— I erm… I maybe want to be a seahorse dad too." He stuttered out, "But I haven't decided yet." He swallowed, his Adam's apple bobbed.

Robby's face softened at his words.

"Anyway it made me feel a little bit of hope, knowing you're doing it now. It's nice to know that I don't have to decide right at this moment, I still have time." Whitaker added.

A lump started to form Robby's throat and his eyes began to sting. He gave him a wobbly smile and nodded, not trusting his voice.

Whitaker smiled back and left him, smacking the counter with his palm lightly.

Robby felt a tear roll down his cheek.

"Ugh!" He groaned and wiped it away, but then another came and then another.

Dana walked up to him, putting a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"Hey… you okay?" She asked, worry in her voice.

He shook his head and furiously wiped his face.

"Yea'… " He looked up at her, tears running freely, "Damn pregnancy hormones…" Robby muttered weakly.

FIRST TIME HE WATCHED JACK FEEL THE BABY KICK

(WEEK 24)

Robby had been feeling stronger and stronger kicks all day but he couldn't tell if they were strong enough yet that other's would feel it.

He had tried to figure that out the whole day, every time they kicked he would put his hand on his bump, trying to feel if he felt it on the outside. It was hard to know.

By the evening, Robby was convinced.

They were strong enough.

He sat on the couch with his legs crisscrossed, his hand on his bump. He was quite big now, he had stopped telling people that he had just gotten a beer belly because his staff were not convinced.

In fact no one in the Pitt were shocked when he had told them that he was pregnant.

Actually many of them had groaned, fished out their wallets and paid a smug looking McKay.

She happily took the money while congratulating him. He didn't bother to ask.

Robby laughed thinking back on it, his baby gave him a sharp kick.

"Don't get all your energy out now, daddy is home soon." He said firmly, looking down at his belly.

The TV played some rerun of a baking show that he was half listening to, he was mainly focused on the clock.

Glancing over at it now and then.

But it wasn't til the commercial break came that the door squeaked open.

"I'm back!" Jack announced, barging in with his hand full of shopping bags.

"Did you get the milk?" Robby asked, looking towards the kitchen.

He heard Jack putting away all the groceries, the rustling as he opened the bags and then the opening of cupboards.

"Yeah!" Jack shouted, "I even got you those weird pre-portioned smoothie mixes that you wanted to try." He added.

"Aw! Thank you!" Robby shouted.

The baby kicked at his shouting, a few sporadic kicks right on his right side.

"Alright, I'll quit yelling." He muttered.

"Hey, who you talkin' to?" Jack asked, his voice all warm and lovey as he walked into the living room.

A soft smile stretched across Robby's lips, he patted the space next to him on the couch. "To the baby, come sit."

Jack joined him, close enough that their shoulders were touching. The only sound in the room was the gentle muttering of the TV now running some infomercial.

Robby held out his hand to him. “Here.”

With question, Jack gave him his hand and Robby placed it on the side of his belly.

Nothing happened for a moment, Robby started to get a little nervous he was making up the kicks but then a tiny faint kick came right under were Jack held his hand.

He snapped his gaze to his partner to see if had felt it.

Jack's eyes were wide with glee as a big dopey grin painted his face. He glanced up from the bump.

"Wow." He said, absolutely amazed.

Robby couldn't help but to smile back, his smile probably just as dopey and happy as Jack's.

He let out a soft chuckle and Jack huffed out one as well, his hand rubbed soothing circles on his belly.

Jack leaned down slightly, "Hey there, sweetheart!"

After a beat, another faint kick came and Jack practically jumped with delight.

"Oh wow! Did you feel that Mikey?! She kicked again!" He cheered, letting out a laugh, utterly awestruck.

She.

Robby's heart swelled at the thought of their baby being a girl. His eyes started to well up a little, a lump began to form in throat.

“Y–you're sure it's a girl?” Robby asked, his voice uneven wobbly.

Jack grinned at him, "Yes! I have a strong feeling that this is a little girl." He said confidently, his hand continued to caress softly.

Robby moved his hand over his, intertwining their fingers together. He tired to swallow down the lump in his throat.

"If you say so." He mumbled, barely containing his smile.

FIRST TIME HOLDING HIS BABY

(WEEK 40)

"Just remember to breathe, honey." Jack said calmly.

"YOU TRY TO BREATHE!" Robby snapped back, panting as he pushed through a contraction.

Jack just ignored his words, shushing gently into his ear as he gripped his hand.

"Head is almost out." The OB nurse said.

Robby closed his eyes, his breath came in gasps, "I can't—"

"Hey!"

He snapped his head to his husband. Jack gently pushed back the sweat-soaked strands of hair on Robby's forehead.

"Yes you can. Just a little bit more." He encouraged, pressing a kiss to the side of his head.

Robby tried to focus on Jack's touch as the next contraction hit, letting out a long moan. The burning as the head made it's way out was agonizing, his lower body felt like was on fire.

Then suddenly the burning stopped, he let out a grunt at the feeling.

"Good! Head is out! Just continue pushing!" His OB yelled.

Robby trembled, panting as another contraction cramped through his body and pushed.

"Fuuuuck!" He screamed, gripping Jack's hand with a death grip.

The baby's shoulders were not as painful as the head was, but still they were not exactly easy to get out.

His heart was beating so aggressively that he barely could hear what his doctor was saying. He just pushed and pushed with all his might, his husbands soft voice cut through the haze of the pain.

"You’re doing so good, Misha. You're right there, just a little more.”

"Ngh!" He groaned, gripping his hand tighter.

He felt a gush of fluids as their baby slipped out of him.

And then, after a beat, cries erupted through the room.

Robby sobbed in relief at the sound, closing his eyes. He felt Jack hug his head close, kissing it gingerly.

Then he felt the warm and wet skin of their baby against his chest, he snapped his eyes open and glanced down.

"Oh wow…" He muttered, his whole body quivering. He reached his hand up, sluggishly, to hold them close. Jack's hand was already there supporting but he wanted to to touch them.

"She's beautiful." Jack said breathlessly as he pressed another kiss to the side of Robby's head.

"She?" Robby glanced over at him, "It's a girl?" He squeaked out and then promptly looked back at the baby.

Jack laughed, "Yes, I was right." He leaned his head on Robby's to look down at their daughter.

Robby gently stroked her soft cheeks with his fingers, murmuring in Russian, "Ты здесь. Ой, ты такая маленькая""You're here. Oh you're so small," His voice trembling as his fingers found her red tuft of hair.

Their daughter continued to cry, letting her parents know her displeasure of leaving her warm home.

Jack rubbed her little hand between his fingers and let out a huff.

"Yeah, I know. You're pissed off, rightfully so. I would be too if I were that warm and cozy for nine months." Jack cooed, making Robby snort.

 The nurse came and gently took her from them, "I'll just weigh her and then you'll get her back." she reassured, making her way to other side of the room.

After a little rest, Robby had woken up to the gentle sound of his husband softly humming.

He glanced over to the side and saw him shirtless in the rocking chair, their daughter on his chest as he hummed with his eyes closed, rocking gently.

Robby smiled, tears sprung to his eyes at the sight. He repositioned himself a bit to sit up more, he let out a grunt as a somewhat sharp pain twinged low down.

"You okay?" Jack's gruff voice muttered.

He glanced over at him again, Jack had stopped rocking the chair.

"Hmm, yea'" Robby answered, his eyes felt heavy, "Just sore."

A soft knock made him looked the other way towards the door, it squeaked faintly as it opened.

Dana's head peeked in.

"Can I come in?" She asked with an excited smile.

Robby nodded tiredly.

She opened the door a little more so that she could fit the stuff that she had in her hands. Three balloons in on of her hands, one that just said 'congrats!' and the other one said 'It's a girl!' and the last one said 'It's a boy!'" but someone had crossed out 'boy' and had written 'girl' under it with a sharpie.

He recognized the handwriting immediately, Santos.

Robby let out a chuckle as she made her way over with them.

"Hey there, tough stuff." She greeted, setting the balloons to the side and gave his shoulder a gentle squeeze, "You feeling alright? Labor wasn't too tough?"

He inhaled before answering, "Yeah, piece of cake…" he said as he exhaled and gave her a smile.

Dana huffed out a laugh and held out two cards.

"One is from all of us downstairs and the other is from Whitaker." She explained.

He took them from her, opening the one on top.

It was the one from the staff, everyone had written something in it.

"Now, I gotta see this little lady." Dana said, making him glance up at her. She gave him a serious look, "You see… that's the whole reason I offered to go deliver these." She gestured to the balloons and the cards.

"Oh wooow. So that's how it is, huh?" He said with playing offended, laying a dramatic hand over his heart.

She shrugged, moving towards Jack, "Sorry to say it Robinavitch, but I only put up with your annoying ass so that I would see this lovely little girl." She said and turned around.

"Jesus Abbot, put on a shirt for Christ sake!" She hissed, holding out her hands for him to give her the baby.

"I'm doing skin to skin!" He argued.

"You're just showing off!"

Robby shook his head in amusement and looked back down at the cards, he closed the first one and put it to the side.

When he saw the second one, his breath caught in his throat.

It was just a piece of card stock folded in the middle, but on the front it had a badly drawn seahorse with a stethoscope around it's neck and a written text above it saying 'Congrats!'.

He took a shaky breath and opened it with trembling fingers, he read the text inside.

'Congratulations! I hope the labor wasn't too difficult, but if it was please lie!

I've finally decided that I wanna too wanna be a seahorse dad! So please lie if it hurt too much I don't wanna be too scared about the birth.

Anyways, I hope you and the baby are okay!

From Dennis Whitaker'

Robby swallowed as he try to get the lump in his throat to go away but didn't succeed, he let out a soft cry and closed the card. He caressed his fingertips over the drawing as tears welled over and ran down his cheeks.

He hugged the card to his heart and closed his eyes, smiling happily.