Work Text:
Aventurine was sitting in his IPC office but then his vision was suddenly blocked and he felt homself beign lifted into a giant sack usef for kidnapping people. He said What the hell??!!??!!?!? but there was no response. soon he was knocked out by blunt trauma though he didnt know that untll he felt it
aventurine woke up in a dark and gross room like gross and moldy kinda core and he was tied to a chair and restrained. Though thankfully the kidnapper did not stoper his mouth because his kidnapper is really stupid and i the author give my thanks to the kidnapper for letting me write this next dialogue in. Aventurine yelled Oh my god WHAT but actually no he didnt cus he has too much aura to freak out he went hohohohoho i will gamble this one out but in his mind so nobody could hear his beautiufl plans.
Then his evil kidnappet Evil Sunday entered the room and he was like heyyyy girll whats uppppp yassss queen u look so good in those restaints yessssss slaayyyyy and aventurine told him to Fuck off and go kill his ugly birdbrained self. Sundays offensemeter went up by a lot becuase he had not gained the power of aura like avwnturine he is easily triggered hahaha chud sunday vs chad aventurine. And then aventurine flew one of his infinite poker chips at sundays face and he was like AHHHH son of a BITCH!!!! WHY DID YOU DO THAT!!! but aventuring WOILDNT HAVE THAT because IT WAS INTERNATIONALWOMENS DAY YESTERDAY I THINK AND HE RESPECTS WOMEN A LOT AND DOES NOT CONDONE CALLING WOMEN BITCHES. SO HE DROP KICKED SUNDAY IN HIS CHAIR CUS HES AN ALPHA LIKE THAT EXCEPT HE ISNTHES AN OMEGA BUT HE GOT ALPHA ENERGY IN THIS MOMENT
SUNDAY lost 99 HP! He is currently in the UNCONCIOUS state and cannot move. Surely if he leveled up his SLROROCORP attribute he would've been able to tank that blow. Meanwhile aventurine is fiddling with his infinite poker chips and infinite cards that he stashes in his pockets and hair and hat and underwear because what else does a gambler do. So he does that for a while until theres someone entering tge room. Avnetirnue was like oh my god what WHY IS THERE SOMEONE HERE. Bursting through the door with his mega HOMOSEXUAL ENERGY was Doctor "Gay Sex" Veritas Ratio. Im here to save you Kitten Aventurine. He said in his deep and strong voice, gay sexly and veritasly and ratioly and doctorly. Aventurine was like omgggg MY HUS BAND. ITS HIM. He was like Hey rat. And then ratio was like Hey urine. So henceforth they formed Team Rat Urine.
Ratio (male, 6'11, ceo, billionaire) used his amazing doctorly powers to untie aventurine (male, 4'1, young, petite) and siwing him over his broad shoulders. Hes 6'11 by the way. Using his nonchalant 6'11ness he strides out the door of sundays house which ratio has lined with explosives. When ratio and venturine leave the building he sets the thing off and they walk away with explosions in the background like a movie and its so much fuckinh aura i shed so many tears. Anyway dr ratio kindly flies back to his partment and sets down aventurine on his bed gently. Thank you my alpha, aventurine avents urinely. Ratio blushes. like a tsundere. Hmph. tsundere ratio (much like hetalia england, as my sister would say) states. Aventurien says Im so glad to get outta EVIL sunday'S (1910-2026) DISGUSTING HOUSE (circa 1958, oil on canvas). and that him and doctor ratio should have gay sex right now!!!!!!
Dr ratios like woah there mamacita. Heh. yeah. lets freak it out... together.......
So they do
If Dr Ratio ejaculates at a speed of 15 m/s at an angle of 40° north parallel to the bed into Aventurine's mouth 50 metres away (on Earth, with negligible air resistance), calculate if the projectile will reach Aventurine.
Dr ratio and aventurine have both gayed out their sexometer today. They are now lying on the cold hard floor and contemplating their life decisions. And also if the problem written above is even realistic. Cheers to gay sex and not kidnapping people.
Soon, they find themselves both asleep because theyre rlly tired
Dan Heng, the most attractive honkai star rail character as acclaimed by many respected scholars, (" Dan heng is really fine i left my wife and children just for him" - Smarty Smarterson, PHD in Physics, Maths, English, Biology, Art, Chemistry, Engineering, Medicine, History, Sociology, Gender Studies, Geography, Optometry, Dentistry) comes into the frame to wish the lovely couple a happy rest of their evening. Applause.