Archive of Our Own

Ever since Taerae was a boy, he dreamed of a love that would sweep him off his feet. Not quite a prince charming, but a soulmate. He knew there was someone out there. Someone just right for him. His one true love.

A teacher of his had called him a daydreamer. While sitting in class, Taerae would fantasize about where his true love lived and where they might meet. Maybe it would be on a plane. Or a party—if he ever happened to be invited to one. Maybe he would have a sister like him. Or a fascination with cars and guitars. And perhaps they already knew one another. Or they’d meet in ten years.

He’d stare out the window every day until his teacher moved his seat across the class. After parent-teacher conferences, his dad had told him to get his head out of the clouds and pay attention. Ever so obedient, Taerae did as he was told.

But if after school he sat in his bed writing poetry about a cute boy in his class instead of doing his homework, his dad wouldn’t have to know about it.

Despite his active imagination, Taerae didn’t have much luck with love in reality. 

His first kiss was when he was seven. It was a little girl who lived next door to his grandfather. She pecked him on the lips, and he immediately wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and wrinkled his nose. The little girl cried in embarrassment. She never came over to play again.

When Taerae was fourteen, his friends told him that a girl on their bus had a crush on him. He didn’t believe them until she passed him a confession note with hearts drawn on it in red ink. She was beautiful with her sparkly round eyes and a bow in her hair, but Taerae had no desire to hold her hand or ask her to the dance. Yet, he did both of those things. It felt like the right thing to do. After two months, however, he told her that they should stay friends. Although she was sad, she accepted his words. They didn’t stay friends though. She wouldn’t even look in his direction on the bus.

A year later, he had his first boyfriend—if one could even call it that. They shared secret kisses under an empty park pavilion and the boy made Taerae swear he wouldn’t tell anyone. Taerae locked his pinky with his and kissed him again. He would have him however he could, even if it meant his heart was aching when they had to pretend not to know each other in the halls.

And while passing him in the hall one day as he always did, Taerae’s heart didn’t just ache this time. It shattered. There was his boyfriend, flirting with a pretty girl whose cheeks were flushed a rosy pink. Taerae’s eyes filled with tears as he stood frozen staring at them. They locked eyes, but he couldn’t say a word. He wouldn’t. He pinky promised.

He was devastated, but he remained hopeful. Even though it personally wasn’t his ideal way of meeting someone, he tried dating apps after he graduated. A speed dating event at his university. A blind date that a friend set him up on. He certainly met some wonderful people through these experiences, but the thought of starting a relationship with any of them didn’t feel right. 

And he definitely didn’t want to hook up. Hook up culture was never desirable to him. He didn’t want a one night stand or a situationship (which is only the trendy way of referring to friends with benefits). He wanted something that would last.

So, he waited. He waited for a man who would love him the way he deserves to be loved and let Taerae love him in all the ways he wants to be loved as well. He waited. And waited some more.

Then, as randomly and naturally as Taerae always hoped he would, he met him.

He was with some friends for dinner after a long week. The restaurant was busy that Friday night and they were told they would have to wait about fifteen minutes before they could be seated. One of his friends complained and insisted they go somewhere else, but Taerae told the hostess they would stay. He was patient when it came to waiting for good things.

It was about twenty minutes later when he and his three friends were seated in a booth near the back of the restaurant. The lighting was dim and it was loud, but full of laughter and light conversation. There was a bar too that was especially tempting to him after a stressful work week. There was even a live performer singing a love song that Taerae’s parents used to play for him on one of their old cassettes. He relaxed into the seat and listened to his friends contemplate over what they were going to order as his eyes scanned over the entree options.

Their waiter had arrived at their table to get their drink orders, but Taerae’s eyes stayed glued to the menu as he now quickly turned to the drink section.

“And you, sir?” the waiter asked in a kind voice.

Taerae could feel everyone’s eyes on him as his eyes darted around the alcoholic drink options. He didn’t drink much so all of the words on the page practically looked foreign to him. With a sigh, he averted his eyes from the menu to their waiter.

His face was as kind as his voice. The corners of the man’s lips were turned up ever so slightly as they met eyes, and above his smiling lips Taerae noticed two little moles. Every time he sees moles on people, he can’t help but think about the legend that moles represent where someone had been kissed by their soulmate in their past life. That was a pretty place to be kissed. Maybe his soulmate even liked to tease him, acting like they were about to kiss him on his lips but then psyching him out. The man looked like he would be fun to tease.

“Do you have any recommendations?” Taerae finally spit out.

The waiter stepped closer to where Taerae sat before slowly leaning over him to point at drinks. Taerae only half paid attention to his words, distracted by the subtle sweet perfume he wore and the veins in his hand that were as pretty yet masculine as the rest of him.

“That one sounds nice,” Taerae said, pointing at the last one the waiter suggested.

He looked up at him as he jotted the drink down on his tiny notepad. As he finished writing it, he peered down at him and smiled shyly when he noticed that Taerae had been staring. Taerae bravely smiled back at him, but his heart was a jack rabbit in his chest.

“My name is Matthew. If you need anything at all, I’ll take care of it,” the waiter said, glancing around at all of them only for his eyes to land back on Taerae. He pressed his lips together almost as if he was trying to hold back another bashful smile. “I’ll be back with your drinks.”

As soon as Matthew disappeared around the corner, all of Taerae’s friends were giggling and teasingly poking at him. His cheeks flushed as he batted their hands away.

“We’re getting his number for you by the end of the night,” one of his friends declared.

By the end of the night, he didn’t get Matthew’s number. However, after ogling at each other during Matthew’s maybe one too many stops at their table to check on them, Taerae had conjured enough confidence to do something he had never had the guts to do before.

He told his friends he would pay for the meal and none of them could argue with that offer. Matthew came back with his card, the receipt, and a pen. When he bid the small group goodbye, his eyes lingered on Taerae again. As he watched him disappear around the corner once more, he prayed that it wasn’t the last time he would see the waiter’s face—especially after the brave move he was about to make.

He scribbled down a generous tip, of course. He always tipped servers well and wrote a little ‘thank you’ with a smiley face. For this particular waiter, his message was a bit different.

I hope this isn't creepy. If it is, pretend you didn’t see it. If it isn’t, you could message me if you’d like. I would love to get to know you more.

Taerae

P.S. You have a beautiful smile.

Under the message, he carefully wrote out his phone number. He checked it a few more times to make sure every number was correct. His friends thought his note was charming and claimed it would absolutely work. Taking their word for it, he walked out of the restaurant feeling a mixture of anxiety and hope.

Taerae made it halfway down the street with his friends when he felt a hand gently wrap around his forearm. Despite the non-threatening nature of the touch, he snatched his arm away and turned around.

There he was, standing in front of him with round eyes and hands held up in surprise. Taerae didn’t notice as his friends walked a bit further down the sidewalk to give the two of them privacy, nor did he notice one of Matthew’s co-workers spying from the doors of the restaurant with a cheesy grin on her face. (Taerae would find out later that she had been the one to find the note on the receipt before rushing to show Matthew. She had to follow him and see the action.)

Taerae didn’t notice any of them. Only Matthew.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,” Matthew said with a little chuckle. His fingers fidgeted with the buttons of his classy black shirt now. “I saw your note. I didn’t think it was weird and I want to get to know you too… and I get off work in ten.”

Although his body language made him seem nervous, his words were as bold as the message Taerae had left on the table. Taerae stared in disbelief. To have his feelings reciprocated in such a forward and personal way felt too good to be true. It was a fascination that only ever lived in his head. Until now. Until Matthew.

A wide, dimpled smile spread across Taerae’s face. He couldn’t hide his joy in this moment even if he tried. 

Matthew’s eyes lit up. “Your smile is also beautiful, by the way,” he said, as if he was adding his own audible postscript to his confession.

Taerae could feel his ears turn red, but he didn’t make any effort to try and hide them either. He wanted Matthew to see, to know how he affects him. He only knew his name, but Taerae was already smitten for the cute waiter and he wanted him to know it.

“I’ll wait right here for ten then,” said Taerae, gesturing at the wide sidewalk under their feet. A few people walked past them on it, but Taerae didn’t pay them any mind. Not when the most handsome man stood only a few feet in front of him.

Walking backwards to head towards the restaurant, Matthew kept his eyes on him too. “I should go finish my shift so I don’t get fired,” he laughed.

“If you get fired then I could see you again even sooner,” Taerae said with a little wink. 

For a moment he was afraid the joke was a bit much. Then Matthew laughed again.

“You’re cute,” Matthew said before turning and jogging towards the doors where Taerae finally noticed the co-worker giggling and waving for him to hurry.

As he disappeared through the doors, Taerae spun on his feet to look at his friends whose reactions were not much different from Matthew’s co-worker. His best friend Hao looked especially proud of him, a smirk on his face that said I taught you well.

About ten minutes later, Taerae stood alone on the sidewalk, leaning against the brick wall of the building beside it. Matthew came wandering out of the restaurant and he looked relieved to see Taerae still where he had left him. The top two buttons of Matthew’s top were undone now and his name tag was removed. His attire was similar to Taerae’s own work clothes that he was still in as well.

Taerae couldn’t help but think that strangers may look at them and think they were all dressed up for a date night. He couldn’t help but instantly imagine them doing that exact thing later on if this worked out. His daydreaming never did quite end.

Daydreaming wasn’t necessary when he was with Matthew, he quickly learned. He brought his dreams to life.

Matthew was a gentleman in all the ways he had dreamed of. He looked right into Taerae’s eyes as he spoke, almost bumping into others walking in the opposite direction because he was so focused on him (which made Taerae laugh quite a bit). He moved to walk on the other side of Taerae, between him and the busy evening traffic. He even opened the door for him when they arrived at a little cafe for a sweet dessert (which he paid for and they shared).

It was the kind of gentleman behavior that was rare in men these days—at least the ones that Taerae met over the years. It was the kind of subtle sweetness that made Taerae want to kick his feet and twirl his hair. He came close to doing it a few times.

“I work at the restaurant full time and once a week I teach at a dance studio,” Matthew explained as he scooped a small piece of cake onto his spoon. “I want to teach there more, but for now it’s all the owner is letting me do. I guess I still have to prove myself.”

Taerae lit up. “That’s your passion then? Dancing?” he asked. He picked up his boba drink and sipped the sweet brown sugar flavor down.

Matthew swallowed his bite as he nodded. “I dropped out of university to pursue it full time, which my mom didn’t agree with,” he said with a little sigh. “But I guess she was onto something. It’s not going great.”

“But it could,” Taerae said. He leaned forward a bit. He was immersed in this exchange completely. “When the timing is right, everything just might fall into place.”

“Is that what happened for you?” Matthew asked with a tiny fond smile, also subtly leaning towards him. “Has everything fallen into place for you? I get the impression you kind of have it all together.”

“Why would you think that?” asked Taerae, his cheeks blushing. He looked down at the cake that he was now poking at with his spoon.

“You seem like a passionate person, based on the conversation we had on the way here,” he replied. “What is your passion, Taerae?”

When Taerae shifted his eyes back up to him, he was greeted by that kind face again. It made him melt into his chair. It made him want to trust him completely, to dive in head first and give him his all.

But he was getting ahead of himself. As usual.

“To be happy,” Taerae simply answered.

Matthew seemed satisfied by that answer. “What makes you happy?” he asked.

“A lot of things,” he responded with a little shrug. “I know it’s a broad statement, but I’m really easy to please. I don’t need much. Being healthy. Feeling safe and secure. To be loved and to be in love…”

“Do you want to get married, Taerae?”

“Do you have a ring for me?” Taerae teased, a wide smile spreading across his face.

Matthew threw his head back as his cheeks now matched the pink in the ones across the table from his. His laugh was like music to Taerae’s ears, and his smile lit up the entire room. It seemed the older woman across the cafe agreed with him as she also looked enthralled by his bright display of amusement. Taerae made eye contact with her and she gave him a little nod.

“Not yet,” Matthew giggled, bringing Taerae’s gaze back to him. “We’ll see how tonight goes.”

Taerae’s blush reached his ears again. He quickly stuffed cake into his mouth, and Matthew giggled even more.

On the way out the door, which Matthew was holding open for him once again, the older woman reached out from her table and touched Taerae’s arm to get his attention. Taerae turned his whole body towards her as she whispered to him.

“Don’t let that one go. He’s a good one.”

Taerae raised his eyebrows in surprise. He had never seen this woman before tonight, but it was as if she somehow knew his story and what this night meant to him. Maybe it was her elder wisdom.

Not having any words in response, he simply bowed before rushing out the door to join Matthew.

“What did she say to you?” Matthew asked as they slowly began walking side by side down the sidewalk again.

“Oh, nothing,” he casually replied, waving his hand. 

But he is bad at lying.

Matthew gave him a deadpan look before reaching over to jokingly push at his shoulder. “Tell me, Rae.”

“Rae?” Taerae stopped in his tracks, an annoyed group of teenage girls walking around them. He brushed his hair behind his ears (although there was nothing much to actually brush back). “Are we using nicknames already, honey?”

The last word was spoken in English. He didn’t know many words in Matthew’s first language, but he always liked the way that pet name in particular sounded.

Matthew rolled his eyes, chuckling at his antics. “Well, yeah. We have to move quickly if you want that ring soon,” he teased. “And I like honey. I don’t think anyone other than my mom has ever called me that. It’s cute coming from you.”

If he called him cute one more time, he may just burst at the seams.

Taerae stared ahead of them, about to explain what the woman in the cafe had said, when a LED sign caught his attention.

“Karaoke!” Taerae exclaimed. He stopped in his tracks once again to point enthusiastically. He was bouncing on the balls of his feet and Matthew smiled like it was the most precious thing he had ever seen. “We should do it.”

“You're full of surprises,” Matthew chuckled. “You like to sing?”

“I go with the marketing team all the time,” he said, gently grabbing his arm and tugging him towards the bar. “Last time we went, I got really tipsy and hogged the mic the entire night.”

“I'll find out if that was a good thing or not once I hear your voice,” Matthew said with a little smirk.

As soon as Taerae let go of his arm, Matthew reached out and took his hand into his own. His mouth gaped open as he looked down at their hands and Matthew’s fingers sliding between his own. He almost froze on the sidewalk for a third time, but instead forced his feet to keep moving towards the bar doors.

Already holding hands after only meeting earlier that night felt like a bold move for Matthew to make, but completely right to Taerae. It felt natural, like it’s where his hand was meant to be. The hopeless romantic in him wanted to believe that it was. So far, Matthew gave him no reason to believe his hand didn’t belong there in his.

Taerae didn’t karaoke immediately upon entering. Instead, they decided to walk together to the bar to get a drink before finding a small and round empty table nearby. He convinced Matthew to drink some soju with him. He told himself that it was his charming smile that made Matthew cave. As they started drinking, however, he could tell he was enjoying himself despite his initial hesitancy.

While others (who were majoritively drunk) sang karaoke on the platform inside the bar, the two of them talked more about anything and everything. Maybe it was selfish or inconsiderate of Taerae to think so, but there weren’t many people he met who he wanted to know everything about. Without a doubt, he is a people person. He enjoys the company of others and going out. Sitting down with someone like this and having a deep conversation was completely different though.

But he couldn’t get enough of Matthew.

“You lived in New York too?” Taerae asked with round eyes. “What brought you there?”

“It was a trip during my gap year that turned into a month and a half stay,” he chuckled. He picked up the bottle to pour more into their shot glasses. “I blew almost all the money I had saved which pissed off my parents, but looking back it was worth it.”

“Blowing all your money or pissing off your parents?” Taerae laughed, eyes wrinkling at the corners.

Matthew tapped his shot glass against Taerae’s. “Both,” he laughed before pressing the glass to his lips.

He laughed along with him before doing the same, the alcohol smooth and crisp as it went down his throat. Once he recovered from the aftertaste, wrinkling his nose for a moment, he told Matthew to tell him more about his New York adventures. He leaned on the table, his cheek resting in his hand as he watched him animatedly tell stories about a wild heavy metal concert he went to and his odd experiences on the New York transit.

“Okay, I’m dying to hear you sing,” Matthew said abruptly.

Taerae moved his hand down from his cheek, now warm and pink. Whether that be from the alcohol or watching Matthew be cute, or both, he couldn’t know for sure.

“Should I go after him?” he asked, nodding at the middle-aged man on the platform who was singing completely off pitch and having the time of his life.

“Are you going to do dance moves like that?” Matthew asked as the man was now aggressively headbanging.

Taerae couldn’t hold back his loud laughter which was thankfully drowned out by the several others talking in the bar. “It’s kind of difficult to do that to a ballad.”

“You already know what song you’re doing?”

He watched as the man was dramatically bowing on the stage before putting the mic on its stand. When he hopped down, Taerae stood up. He took one more little sip of the soju straight from the bottle and winked at Matthew.

“I figured it out while listening to your stories,” he replied before hurrying towards the stage before anyone beat him to it.

He approached the bar employee who was controlling the karaoke music and lyric monitor. Leaning in so the man could hear him, Taerae told him what song he would like to do. The man nodded and began working to queue it up. He moved slowly, clearly bored with his job and probably tired of hearing drunk people attempt to sing.

While he waited for him to find the song, Taerae grabbed the mic from the stand and his eyes searched for Matthew immediately. He smiled wide at him when they made eye contact.

“I guess I’ll dedicate this song to you,” Taerae said into the mic. He shrugged. “I don’t know anyone else here.”

That pulled a laugh out of Matthew. Pride bubbled in Taerae’s chest for making him smile.

Thankfully Taerae was looking at the monitor as the song was beginning. The start of SG Wannabe’s Writing Our Stories is completely acapella, a countdown showing when the first lyrics began. He used his chest voice as he sang the deep intro, closing his eyes to completely immerse himself in the lyrics.

Singing is the one thing Taerae can’t do humbly. He knows he is skilled. He didn’t go through years of choir and vocal lessons for nothing. In another life, he is sure he would have a successful career in performing. This universe had other plans. In this life, it is a secret talent that he would always show off—especially to unsuspecting cute men.

The bar gradually decreased in volume a bit, everyone enthralled by his bright voice and his somewhat peculiar song choice. But when he opened his eyes once he got to the first verse to see Matthew smiling and his eyes round in awe, he knew nobody was as mesmerized as him. Taerae almost giggled into the microphone, but quickly composed himself.

The bar crowd hollered and whistled as his karaoke performance came to a close. Some even put down their drinks to clap. Taerae’s eyes landed on their table to see what Matthew was doing now only to discover that he was missing, both of their chairs abandoned. Before he could even begin searching for him, a warm hand slid into his own and then guided him towards a dark empty hall nearby.

Taerae’s eyes widened even once he realized that it was of course Matthew. He peered into his eyes which curved as he tenderly smiled at him. And there was nothing quite like his smile. It practically glowed, much like the warm evening sunset did when Matthew met him on the sidewalk earlier that evening.

“That made me want to kiss you, but PDA makes me a little uncomfortable,” Matthew shamelessly admitted.

Gazing down the hall they were standing in, Taerae observed that it led to a set of doors which would open to an alleyway outside. Also in the hall was a door that had a piece of notebook paper taped to it with the word ‘storage’ written on it in permanent marker. It was dark and private, surely the only place in the bar where they could truly be alone and uninterrupted.

“I see,” Taerae mumbled, cheeks burning red. He turned back to Matthew. He raised his eyebrows. “Are you going to?”

The toes of Matthew’s shoes were touching the toes of his, hardly any distance between them now. Taerae wanted Matthew to close the distance immediately. He wasn’t brave enough to do it himself.

Then it happened in a blink. Matthew’s lips were pressed to his and he could taste the soju on them. The aftertaste didn’t have the same bitter burn this time though. When they pulled apart briefly, softly smiling at one another, Taerae eagerly moved in for more. He didn’t think he could possibly get enough of his taste and his supple lips that moved with no hurry, as if he was savoring Taerae’s flavor as well.

His hands touched the smooth skin of Matthew’s face and neck which he discovered was just as warm as his own. Matthew’s hands touched his waist with light fingertips and pulled him in closer. Being held by Matthew was comforting. He felt safe.

When he felt his fingers move slightly lower, however, Taerae pulled away just enough to make eye contact.

“I, um, don’t do hookups,” Taerae mumbled awkwardly. He pressed his thumb against a tiny mole on Matthew’s cheek that he hadn’t noticed earlier. Not until he was this close. “I thought you should know. I hope that doesn’t kill the mood.”

“Oh, that’s completely fine. I didn’t think that’s where this was going,” Matthew said in surprise, his eyes round. One of his hands trailed back to his waist. His thumb rubbed circles against the smooth material of his button up shirt (and Taerae melted). “I was kissing you just to kiss you. I don’t expect anything more.”

(Taerae was a puddle.)

Matthew smiled against his lips when Taerae immediately kissed him again. A warmth spread through his chest as he also kissed Matthew just to kiss him. No ulterior motives. No hidden agenda. To kiss.

“When can I see you again?” Matthew asked later that night.

After leaving the bar, they walked together to where Taerae had parked his car. They sat inside of it and talked for another hour before deciding to call it a night. Taerae drove Matthew to his apartment building and he invited him inside. He said his roommates were out for the night. He emphasized that he wasn’t implying they would do anything. Just to talk. Just to maybe just kiss some more.

Taerae was tempted by the offer, but he was beyond tired. As much as he would have loved to pull an all-nighter and talk with Matthew until the sun rose, his eyes were dying to meet the inside of his eyelids.

So now they lingered outside of Matthew’s apartment door. He held Taerae’s hand in his and lightly swung them between their bodies.

“You saved my number, yeah?” asked Taerae, tilting his head at him.

“Not yet.” Matthew reached into the pocket of his trousers and pulled out the receipt Taerae had left the note on. “I technically should have left this at my job, but I kind of really loved your note. I wanted to keep it.”

Taerae chuckled and shook his head. “You’re kind of really cute,” he said before bashfully looking down at the receipt. The receipt that started it all. “Don’t lose it. I’ll be waiting for your message.”

As Matthew slid the receipt back into his pocket, Taerae leaned in and pecked his lips one more time for good measure. Or what he thought was one more time, at least.

“You know, I’ve never kissed on the first date before.” Taerae slid his hand out of his and started to walk backwards towards his car. He watched Matthew as he smirked at him. His stomach twirled.

“Was this a date?”

Taerae gave him a deadpan look, stopping next to the door of his car with his hands on his hips. “I don’t just kiss anyone, Matthew. This was a date.”

Matthew chuckled fondly. “Okay. Yeah. This was definitely a date,” he said, leaning back against his apartment door. The warm yellow glow of the exterior light by his door lit the side of his face. He was stunning. “Will you go on a second date with me, Taerae?”

Taerae dropped his hands from his hips and slipped them into his pockets. “Hm…” He looked up at the jet-black sky and pursed his lips. “I’ll think about it.”

“You’ll think about it?”

“Yes, I’ll think about it.”

Footsteps approached him on the asphalt. The corners of Taerae’s lips curled up.

“I’ll be waiting for your answer,” whispered Matthew before pressing a soft kiss to his cheek.

Taerae’s lips stretched even further. He turned his head to look at Matthew whose twinkling eyes made up for the lack of visible stars in the sky. 

The kiss he pressed to his lips this time was for sure the last of the night. For good measure. They would share many more on their second date. And their third and fourth. Between dates when they would meet on Taerae’s lunch break. Late nights meeting for a drink or taking a walk. And before and after all the goodbyes that Taerae dreaded.

Matthew cracked his heart open in a way no other man had managed to. In a way Taerae hadn’t allowed any other man to. In a short period of time, he shared deep emotions that he had only ever shared with Hao and his older sister.

“I think I was hopeful that I would meet someone who I would fall in love with, but there was this fear that would creep up on me,” Taerae whispered one night a few weeks later. “The fear that I would be alone forever.”

Post sharing more just kisses and cuddles, they rested in Taerae’s bed together. Taerae lay on his back and Matthew was on his stomach beside him. Matthew's hand rested on Taerae’s stomach and Taerae contentedly played with his fingers. He wore a couple rings that he spun around and slid up and down his fingers as if Matthew’s hand was a fidget toy.

Earlier that night, Matthew had arrived with grocery bags of ingredients. The food came out perfect and the fact that he looked so attractive while cooking was a major plus. Taerae helped by playing music and talking his ears off. Free entertainment.

After filling their stomachs and washing the dishes together, which felt perfectly domestic, they ended up in bed. They had started a movie only to soon forget that they ever put it on. When Matthew was around, Taerae wanted to give him his full attention. He becomes the center of his universe the moment he enters any room.

“You’re the last person I would expect to be alone forever,” Matthew chuckled. He pressed his face into Taerae’s pillow, his words becoming muffled. “I think you’re a catch.”

“Aw, shucks,” Taerae giggled. He nudged Matthew’s leg with his foot. “That’s sweet.”

Matthew laughed softly into the pillow before facing him again. “Are you in love with me yet?” He had a cheeky little smile on his face.

Biting his bottom lip, Taerae felt shy suddenly. He knew the answer to this question and he had thought about it plenty. Admitting it out loud was a whole other ordeal.

Taerae turned his face to the ceiling. “Hm…”

“Hm?” Matthew slid his hand slightly under Taerae’s oversized t-shirt. His thumb stroked the skin of his tummy right above the waistband of his joggers. “Did you know you’re blushing?”

A shiver went down Taerae’s spine as he slid his hand further under the shirt and to his side. Then he burst into laughter. Matthew squeezed at his side, tickling him enough that he was curling up and attempting to push him away.

He slapped Matthew's arm. “I will literally kick you. Stop,” Taerae got out between his painful laughter.

Matthew mischievously giggled. Wrapping his arm around Taerae’s waist, now that they were fully facing one another, he pulled him in closer. He knocked his nose against his flirtily.

“I’m in love with you,” Matthew whispered ever so casually. “Do you think it’s too soon?”

Taerae felt his heart skip a beat in response to the confession. It had been only three weeks since Matthew waited on his table at the restaurant. It felt like just yesterday yet also like he’d known him all his life.

“Not at all.” He smiled benevolently at him, bringing his hand up to caress Matthew’s cheek in his hand. “I love you too.”

Neither of them had any desire to move their relationship slowly from that moment forward. Taerae was truly diving in head first and giving him his all, just as he wanted to since the night they met. He was serious about him.

And to show how serious he was, Taerae brought Matthew to his hometown to meet his parents a week after that. 

His parents fell for Matthew as quickly as he did. His mom was especially charmed by his manners and how adorable he was when he enthusiastically tried every food she prepared for lunch. His dad also liked all the answers Matthew had to his questions about his family values and career goals, admiring his determination to pursue his dream of dance—which was a surprising response from a businessman who had several degrees under his belt.

An hour into their day with his parents, it was clear that they approved. It was the first guy that Taerae had ever brought home. He hoped that Matthew would also be the only.

Taerae was more nervous meeting Matthew’s family than he was having Matthew meet his—and it was over video chat. Out of the view of the camera, Taerae clutched Matthew’s hand tightly as the image appeared on the screen of his mom and sister who were thousands of miles away in Canada.

His nerves quickly went away once they began talking. He could see Matthew in them. In their smiles and laughter. In their humor and playful banter. He began to talk comfortably after that. By the end of the call, Taerae had his sister’s Instagram and his mom made them promise they would meet in person soon. It couldn’t have gone better.

Two months later, they were intimate for the first time.

In the days and weeks leading up to it, they expressed their attraction and adoration for one another in many ways. Kissing. Cuddling. Touching over clothes. Matthew never pressured Taerae to do more. He didn’t rush him. He knew it would happen when they were both ready.

And one random Sunday morning, Taerae was ready. He didn’t plan it to be that morning. In fact, all of the times he fantasized about it—because of course he even daydreamed about having sex with Matthew—he never imagined it to be in the morning. He thought it would be under the moonlight with candles lit and soft music playing to set the mood.

Yet there they were in the broad daylight inside Taerae’s bed, wrapped in each other’s arms as Matthew gave him time to adjust. Taerae was already breathless, staring at him in utter disbelief that this was real life, that this was actually happening. With the sunshine pouring in through the windows of his bedroom, they were fully exposed. They couldn’t hide in any shadows and there was no music to mask any sounds that escaped them.

It wasn’t how Taerae imagined, but just like every other moment with Matthew, it was better.

Taerae whined as Matthew moved slowly and deliberately, still allowing him time to adjust to the feeling of him inside. His lips were pressed to Taerae’s neck, kissing him through every bit of the discomfort and pleasure. It was a mix of both sensations. It was something like he had never experienced before.

“Matthew,” whispered Taerae as his kisses trailed from his neck to his jaw and then behind his ear. His back arched as Matthew pressed further into him. A new pleasure coursed through his body. “I’ve waited for you my whole life.”

Matthew moved his face in front of Taerae’s with a look so intense in his eyes, an expression that he had never seen. His eyes may as well have been hearts.

He kissed Taerae with the same passion and unhurriedness as usual while moving his hips a bit faster in such a way that had him moaning against his lips. His fingertips pressed into Matthew’s back as his speed increased and his cock that was pressed between their bodies was receiving an overwhelming amount of friction.

Breaking from the kiss, Matthew pressed his face into Taerae’s neck again. The feeling of his breath against his skin made Taerae shiver. It was almost enough to drive him over the edge, and once he felt Matthew’s hand wrapping around his length, he knew it wouldn’t be much longer after that.

“I love you,” Matthew whispered. He moved his hand in time with the movement of his hips, now thrusting into him harder and faster. “I love you. I love you so much, Kim Taerae.”

Taerae couldn’t get the words out to reply. Not even a moan. There was only the sound of their bodies moving in tandem and the headboard of the bed occasionally hitting the wall. The verbal exclamations of love continued to fall from Matthew’s lips on top of it all.

To feel Matthew fill him was even more special than Taerae could have ever pictured. And once he spilled his own pleasure between their bodies, he was in absolute bliss.

“Are you still with me?” Taerae laughed as they came down from the high. He poked at Matthew’s cheek. “Earth to Matt?”

Matthew kept his eyes closed. “Give me a moment,” he said with a dopey smile. “That was a lot.”

Taerae looked down at the mess they made. “You’re telling me,” he mumbled. He slowly sat up, feeling sore but mostly sticky. “Let’s go get cleaned up, jagiya.”

Groaning softly, Matthew let Taerae pull him up from the bed and into the bathroom connected to the room. While in the shower, Taerae could see every mole on Matthew’s body. He kissed a few of them between helping him clean up, but especially the ones along his collarbone. They were his favorite.

In the months following, Matthew spent less time at his own apartment and more time at Taerae’s house. It wasn’t that Matthew hated his apartment. In fact, his roommates were wonderful. Their names were Gyuvin and Ricky, a couple that had been together for five years. They had an interesting dynamic. Gyuvin was a tall, lanky puppy who would do anything to make his boyfriend smile while Ricky pretended to be uninterested in everything but was actually as soft as can be and really easy to please. They were not only his roommates, but also two of Matthew’s closest friends. 

However, he liked using Taerae’s kitchen to cook for them and liked that his shower was wide enough for the both of them to wash up together (to save water, of course). His smile was also extra wide when he woke up next to Taerae. And Taerae enjoyed waking up to see it.

“Have fun at work,” Matthew sang on a particularly sunny morning from Taerae’s couch, legs crossed under him and scooping yogurt into his mouth.

Taerae smiled fondly at him, grabbing his work bag and keys. “I’ll have so much fun doing my marketing shit,” he chuckled. He leaned down to press a kiss to Matthew’s head. “Have fun teaching your class. Dance hard.”

“You know it.” Matthew winked as he watched him approach the door. “I’ll see you tonight.”

Taerae winked back. He opened the door to leave, but froze as he was halfway out the door. He turned on his heels and looked at Matthew who was still watching him. Somehow even in his black tank top with his bulky arms out, Matthew looked beyond precious. Taerae was beyond in love.

“Move in with me?” Taerae asked. He tilted his head at him and bit his lip. “I know some people might think it’s a bit soon. It’s only been seven months since we made it official official, but… I don’t think it’s too soon for us. Don’t you agree?”

He took a deep breath and continued before Matthew could get a word in. “And I know that maybe you might be concerned about the financial aspect, but don't worry about that. I can afford this house on my own so I don't expect you to split the rent with me. It's closer to the dance studio too and I could drop you off anytime you wanted. I'll drive you anywhere. Plus this place is lonely, so I think having a roommate would make me feel less lonely. And who better than my smoking hot boyfriend?”

Matthew stared in silence for a few moments before casually setting the bowl of yogurt down on the table in front of him. “Yes,” he said with a massive smile. He sprung up from the couch and practically attacked Taerae in a tight hug. “I’ve been waiting for you to ask.”

“You’re suffocating me,” laughed Taerae, patting his back gently.

“Sorry,” Matthew said, pulling away a bit.

“No, don’t stop. I like it.”

They hugged again, even tighter than they had before. Taerae was late to the office that day. He told his boss that he was stuck in traffic. In reality, he was stuck in his boyfriend’s embrace. He could have stayed there forever.

Once Taerae’s house also officially became Matthew’s, it had never felt so much like home. His Pokémon and action figure collections sat next to Taerae’s shelf of his car figures. His gaming room now also had Matthew’s dumbbells. Their toothbrushes sat next to each other in a cup and their clothes hung together in the bedroom closet. 

They even had couples mugs that sat on the kitchen counter. Ricky bought them as a ‘housewarming’ gift. One had the word ‘husband’ printed on it in cursive and the other read ‘wife’. He specifically handed the wife one to Matthew. He uses it everyday.

It was one afternoon, ten months in, while Matthew had that mug cradled to his chest, that Taerae longed to make the sentiment of the mugs their reality. He daydreamed about future moments just like this, snuggled together on the stairs outside their house while drinking hot tea and enjoying the light breeze. Except there would be rings on their left ring fingers. And although it wouldn’t be by legality, it would be utterly real to them. He wouldn’t be his boyfriend—or his wife—but his smoking hot husband.

A little under two months later, they ate dinner at the restaurant where they had first met. Matthew pulled some strings, since he still worked there, and made sure they had the same table Taerae and his friends had sat at exactly a year ago. 

It was a little big for just the two of them. Matthew said that meant space for more food. In the middle of the table was a little candle and rose petals scattered around it. Taerae thought it was romantic, but he also turned the brightest color red possible as they approached Matthew’s setup. Everyone was staring and he wanted to hide.

As someone who said he didn’t like PDA a year ago, Matthew was being incredibly public with his affection. 

“When did you become this romantic?” Taerae asked before taking a sip of his drink. 

He didn’t remember what he ordered a year ago, but Matthew did.

“Um. I’ve always been this romantic.” Matthew smirked at him. He picked up a rose petal and flicked it in Taerae’s direction. (He missed him.) “I’m a modern day Shakespeare, baby.”

Taerae had to roll his eyes at that. “I’m not a fan of Shakespeare.”

“Okay, then… I’m a modern day Ed Sheeran.”

“You’re so stupid.”

They played footsie under the table and held hands over it. Their favorite dishes were spread across it and they fed each other from them. Eventually Taerae didn’t care if anyone was staring. Not even when Matthew kissed a piece of meat before feeding it to Taerae and they both burst into giggles.

He really was so stupid, but in all the right ways. He was right for him in all the right ways. Even when they argued and Matthew insisted he was right (although he clearly wasn’t). Even when Matthew left his dirty clothes on the floor. Even when he yelled at Taerae for doing the same. He was right for him. Taerae didn’t want anyone else.

Once they paid and were outside on the sidewalk, Taerae suddenly gasped and turned to Matthew. “I left my jacket inside,” he said in surprise. “Can you go back in and get it for me? It’s on my chair.”

Matthew immediately nodded, brushing past him to head back into the restaurant. As soon as he disappeared through the door, Taerae began walking further up the sidewalk. He stopped once he was in front of a brick building. With his back still turned towards the restaurant, now halfway down the street, he reached into the pocket of his pants. When he pulled out his hand, he held something in his palm. Something cubed and velvety.

He stared at it and his hands began to shake. This was happening. He was doing this.

“What is that?” Matthew asked from behind him moments later.

Startled, Taerae jumped and turned towards him. The box was in full view between them. It wasn’t a secret now. This was definitely happening.

“A year ago today, we had our first date at a little cafe. There was a sweet woman there who stopped me on the way out the door. She told me that I shouldn’t let you go, that you’re a good one. I never forgot her words because even though we had only met that day, I knew you were something special. That we were something special,” Taerae said, his voice shaking as much as his hands were.

Matthew’s eyes were the size of saucers and there was the slightest of smiles on his face. The smile became more prominent as Taerae knelt down and opened the box. A simple silver ring was inside. It had diamonds embedded in it and it wasn’t too flashy. It was exactly Matthew’s style.

He stared up at Matthew whose eyes were watering now and continued. “I don’t want to ever let you go. I want forever with you. Will you marry me, Matthew?”

An excited laugh cascaded from his lips. He brought Taerae’s jacket to his face—which Taerae had purposely left behind as a distraction—and wiped his tears away with it. From where he still knelt down, Taerae laughed as well. Seeing Matthew’s tears, happy or not, always made him want to wrap him in his arms and kiss all of them away. But he stayed right where he was, anticipating his answer.

“Will I marry you?” Matthew sniffled. He reached out and took one of Taerae’s hands into his. “In a heartbeat. I’m yours forever.”

Taerae was tugged to his feet by his hand. Their lips crashed together as soon as they were face to face. There were claps and cheers from a few passersby who had stopped on the sidewalk to watch their moment, as well as a group across the street that happened to spot the sweet proposal.

Tucking his red face into Matthew’s neck, he left it to him to thank the strangers who were congratulating them. Then, once they were alone again, Taerae pulled away from him to remove the ring from the box. He slid it onto Matthew’s finger before bringing it up to his lips and kissing it gently. It was awfully cheesy, but Matthew smiled so wide that it was worth it.

“It’s a perfect fit,” Matthew said. He leaned forward and pecked his lips again. “I love you.”

“I stole your friendship ring and took it to the jeweler so I could get the same size,” Taerae chuckled, referring to another ring of Matthew’s that he had gotten with his best friend Hanbin. 

Matthew took his hand gently into his. “I did the same,” he said as casually as ever before leading the way down the sidewalk.

Tilting his head in confusion, Taerae stumbled behind him. “What do you mean?”

“I also stole one of your rings.” He smirked over at him. “You beat me to proposing, but your ring is at home inside my nightstand.”

Taerae released his hand to grab at his arm, forcing Matthew to stop walking and turn to face him. “You’re serious?” he asked with bright eyes. “Let’s go home immediately. I need to see it now.”

It wasn’t the ring itself that had Taerae on the verge of tears. It was the promise behind the ring. The commitment Matthew also had to him.

“Of course. Then, we can both wear our rings and… celebrate,” whispered Matthew. He wiggled his eyebrows playfully, wrapping his arm around Taerae’s waist. “What do you say, Rae?”

Taerae bit his lip while glancing down at Matthew’s lips which were far too difficult to resist. “Absolutely.” He leaned in and whispered in his ear. “And I’m topping, honey.”

He hysterically laughed as Matthew began eagerly pulling him down the sidewalk towards where they had parked the car.

That night, once they had showered and were back in bed wearing nothing but their new rings, they discovered that they had both asked each other’s parents for their blessing and permission to propose. They giggled about it for a good while, the fact that both of their families approved of their engagement fully knowing that their own son was planning to propose as well. It all felt so perfect.

A year was fast—but when you know, you know. Taerae’s dream had come true. He had a love that swept him off his feet. His one true love.

But as the saying goes, two is better than one.

♡

Taerae was convinced that there was nothing cuter than watching Matthew get excited.

For their one year wedding anniversary, Taerae went all out. For an entire week, they would stay at a nice hotel on Jeju Island which in itself had Matthew bouncing off the walls. As Taerae walked around with him to show him everything from the pool to the spa and sauna, Matthew hugged his arm and kissed his cheeks. He was bursting with joy.

“I think this is my favorite part,” Matthew said as they walked back into their hotel room. He wandered to the wide window. “This view is gorgeous. The water is the bluest I think I have ever seen.” He turned to look back at Taerae who was sprawled out on the bed, exhausted from their morning of travel. “This view is even better.”

Taerae’s cheeks flushed and he rolled his eyes. “You flatter me,” he mumbled before turning onto his side. The beige short sleeve button up and shorts set he wore was comfortable enough to sleep in. “I need a nap, Matt. I promise I’ll have more energy by tonight.”

Fondly smiling, Matthew walked over to the bed and leaned down to press his lips to Taerae’s temple. “Would you be offended if I went down to the beach while you sleep?” he asked softly. He stroked Taerae’s hair from his face. It was the longest he had ever grown it out and Matthew adored it. “I’ll bring you back some food.”

“Not at all,” Taerae whispered back, closing his eyes. “I planned this trip for you. Go enjoy yourself while I enjoy this perfect bed.”

Matthew chuckled into his hair before pressing a few more kisses to his head. “I’ll leave you to that, baby.”

He didn’t fall asleep immediately. Instead, he watched as Matthew got changed into one of his swimming shorts and a loose tank top, smiling sleepily when he called him a perv for staring. He didn’t have the energy to deny it. 

“Love you,” Taerae mumbled, eyes closed again and closer to sleep. “Be safe.”

“I love you. I’ll be back before dark.”

He listened to his footsteps until he couldn’t hear them anymore. It was then that Taerae let his drowsiness take over completely.

Two hours later, Taerae woke up to his phone buzzing next to him in the bed. He rubbed one of his eyes with the back of his hand and then answered the call from Matthew.

“Wake up, sleepy head,” he sang over the phone. “I made a friend on the beach. I played volleyball with him and his friends and now he’s inviting us to dinner. It would just be us and him. Really laid back. But if you don’t want to, I can tell him we can meet up another day.”

It was no surprise to him that his husband managed to make a friend only a few hours into their trip. Although Taerae may have done the same if it was him down at the beach.

“I’ll meet you there,” Taerae mumbled, stretching out his limbs on the bed. He hummed as his shoulders popped. “I think that was the greatest nap ever.”

“You’re cute,” Matthew chuckled. “See you soon.”

When he arrived at the restaurant, he was in awe of the atmosphere. The sunset was gorgeous, oranges and pinks painted across the sky, and the breeze light. The restaurant was outdoors, right beside the beach. There was a large awning with pretty string lights and lanterns hung around it, patio tables and chairs set up under it.  And sitting at one of the tables was his Matthew. His Matthew and his glowing smile.

“Where is your new friend? You made him up, didn’t you? Are you hallucinating?” Taerae giggled as Matthew stood to pull him in for a hug. He rested his head in the crook of his neck. “Do we need to spend our anniversary at a hospital instead?”

Matthew squeezed at his side, making him giggle even more. “He’s in the bathroom, dummy.” He pulled away from the hug and guided him to the table to sit down next to him. He kept his arm around Taerae’s waist as they sat down side by side. “You’re seriously going to love him, Rae. There’s something about him that is so… enticing.”

“Are you in love or something?” teased Taerae. He grabbed Matthew’s drink by the stem of the glass and took a sip of the tropical liquid. He wrinkled his nose slightly and sat it back down. “Did you find a new husband?”

“Oh, definitely. He’s really handsome. Funny,” Matthew said, looking out at the sunset with a dreamy expression. “And tall too. Probably about 184 centimeters if I had to guess.”

Taerae slapped at his shoulder, both of them bursting into laughter.

“You were right. Your husband is hot.”

Both of their heads turned quickly towards the voice. Red spread across Taerae’s cheeks as he stared at the man in front of them. 

He kind of had a baby face. His cheeks were made to be squished and his eyes were round and innocent-like. Yet his broad shoulders and strong figure were the giveaway that he was surely no kid. Although, Taerae was certain he was younger than them. And his eyes—his eyes were beyond beautiful.

“Me? Hot?” Taerae asked with a little smirk, quickly snapping himself out of his daze. He looked to Matthew who cheekily shrugged. “You’ve been flirting with me all day.”

Matthew chuckled. “It’s impossible not to.”

Rolling his eyes, but smiling wide, he brought his attention back to Matthew’s new friend. “It’s nice to meet you. I’m Taerae.”

“Gunwook,” he replied sweetly. “Would you like a drink? I can go order you one at the bar.”

Taerae perked up. “That would be amazing.” He nodded across the table at the small glass in front of Gunwook’s seat. It looked like whiskey, but he couldn’t be sure. “I’ll have whatever you’re having. It has to be better than Matt’s fruity drink.”

Laughing, Gunwook nodded. “It is.” He began to make his way towards the bar at the back of the awning, glancing back at the both of them with another soft smile.

As soon as he was far enough away, Taerae turned to Matthew with a shocked expression on his face. “Holy shit. He’s fucking hot.”

Matthew threw his head back in laughter. “Well, I did say he was tall and handsome.”

“That’s an understatement. He’s a whole model, Matthew.”

“I’ve never seen you thirst over a man like this.”

Taerae scoffed at him. “I’m not thirsting. I’m admiring,” he muttered. He settled back into his arm that still held him around the waist. “I’m married. I only thirst for one man.”

“Good,” he whispered before pressing a long kiss to his lips. “I can’t lose you to a hot younger guy.”

Taerae stared into his eyes before closing the space between them again. He grasped his face gently in his hand as they deepened their kiss. There were moments when it would really sink in that he got this lucky, that he found a guy this amazing who he now gets to call his husband. And here they are on their one year wedding anniversary trip.

“God, we’re making love tonight,” he mumbled against his lips.

“Good,” Matthew repeated. He giggled softly, separating from him just in time for Gunwook to arrive back at their table.

“Here you go, hyung,” he said, holding the glass out to him. “Is it okay that I call you hyung?”

As he slowly brought the glass to his lips, Gunwook sunk into his chair across from him. Their eyes stayed locked as the robust flavor went down his throat. “Of course,” he said with a little smile. “Thank you for the drink. It’s so much better than his.”

They both chuckled as Matthew clicked his tongue next to him. It was always fun to tease Matthew. It was even more fun to have someone to tease him with.

“What brings you to Jeju, Gunwook?” he asked, settling the glass on the table with his hand still wrapped around it. “Are you vacationing too?”

“It’s a graduation trip, I guess you could call it. I came with some buddies to celebrate,” Gunwook said. “They’re all getting drunk in the hotel lounge at the moment.”

“They’re staying at the same hotel as us,” Matthew softly added.

Taerae tilted his head at him. “And you chose to hang out with a married couple instead of your friends?”

“Happily.”

The smile on Gunwook’s face as he looked between them was so incredibly sweet and fond. Taerae’s stomach spun. He brought the glass back to his lips and sipped at the alcohol instead of thinking about what that meant.

The younger man spoke gently yet confidently, so sure of himself and who he is. Three years younger than them, he was incredibly mature and well spoken yet had a playful spirit. Taerae thought he was magnificent, inside and out.

“I work with at-risk youth,” Gunwook explained later in the evening. He picked up a shrimp and dipped it in the gochujang cocktail sauce. “I had a rough childhood, so I want to help kids have a better life than I did.”

His graduation trip was to celebrate his master’s degree in social work. Taerae leaned in with intrigue when he told them. It was impressive. Although, if he were honest with himself, he was finding everything that came out of his mouth interesting.

“Rough childhood?” Matthew said before reaching forward with his chopsticks to grab some black pork to put on Taerae's plate and then his own. “You don’t have to tell us anything more if you don’t want to, of course. I’m just curious.”

Gunwook shrugged. “Wouldn’t be the first time I’ve trauma dumped over a dinner,” he joked.

It got a chuckle out of Taerae. That was his kind of humor.

“I was in the foster system until I was adopted at ten,” he said. He looked into their eyes as he told his story, unashamed. “But that family was a mess. They were controlling and abusive even to their biological children. I ended up running away at sixteen and bounced from house to house until I made a friend whose family took me in. Now they’re my family too.”

“And now you have a master’s degree and help kids that were like you,” Matthew said in awe. 

Taerae smirked into his whiskey glass. Seeing his husband ogle over another man should make him jealous. Instead, it was amusing.

“That’s my hope,” replied Gunwook. 

“That’s amazing.”

His cheeks went bright pink (and Taerae thought it was adorable). “Thank you, hyung.” Bashfully, he ducked his head. “You’re really sweet.”

(Incredibly adorable.)

They spoke at the restaurant until it closed before moving their conversation to the beach. Sitting in the sand together, they got to know each other even more. Matthew told stories that had Gunwook clutching his stomach from laughing so hard. Taerae was excited to find that he also played guitar, though he was still learning. He told Gunwook that he could teach him more since he brought along his guitar. The younger man was genuinely enthusiastic about that idea.

Resting his head in Matthew’s lap, Taerae stared over at the man who now lay on the ground next to them. He was probably getting tons of sand in his hair and the apples of his cheeks were red. And whether the blush of his cheeks be from the alcohol or some other factor, Taerae thought it only made him more precious.

“I don’t want to intrude on your anniversary trip,” Gunwook said. He sat up, brushing the sand off of himself. “But I'm here for a few more days and I’d love to see you both again. I’ve really liked hanging out.”

Matthew looked down at Taerae whose tender smile mirrored his own. “You’re not intruding at all. We should definitely meet up again,” he said, turning back to Gunwook. “We can make a group chat on KakaoTalk. Get in touch.”

“That sounds great, hyung.”

Since it was late, and they were all a bit tipsy, they walked the younger man up to his hotel room. It was only a floor below theirs. He proudly told them that he had a room all to himself, which is exactly how he likes it while on a trip like this.

“I used to feel that way too,” Taerae admitted, keeping his voice low to not disturb other guests. One of his hands brushed against Gunwook’s as they walked down the length of the hall. His other held Matthew’s hand tightly. “I like to have my personal space and to have things a particular way… and then I met this guy.” He smiled over at Matthew. “He still gives me my space where I need it, but I also don’t mind sharing it with him.”

Gunwook looked between them with soft eyes. He stared at them in a way that had Taerae flustered, as if he was staring into their souls. Trying to figure them out or maybe admiring them for all they are. He would have asked what he was thinking, but he didn’t have the courage. Instead he would overthink it. Fantasize about it. As usual. 

Suddenly, Gunwook tripped over his own feet, finally looking away as he caught himself. Matthew quickly let go of his husband’s hand to reach across and grab at him to keep him from falling—although he was already stable on his feet and it wasn’t actually necessary. 

They all giggled, leaning into each other and trying to keep quiet. Taerae pat Gunwook’s back and said that he maybe had one too many glasses of whiskey, though he too knew that they tasted delightfully pungent and it was impossible to stop after one.

Once they arrived at Gunwook’s door, they both gave him a hug and promised they would see him again soon. They watched as he disappeared through the door, staring back at them until it clicked shut. Even then, they both stood there silently with their eyes locked on the shiny numbers hanging on dark wood.

“So your friend is pretty fucking cool,” whispered Taerae, bumping Matthew with his elbow. “And still pretty fucking hot.”

Matthew snorted and elbowed him back. “Just like my husband.”

“I’ve heard,” he giggled. He wrapped his arms around Matthew and pressed his lips to his jaw and then down along his neck. His lips stretched into a smile against his skin as Matthew hummed and let his head fall back. “Let’s go to our room, my honey.”

“Are we still making love?” Matthew wiggled his eyebrows at him, a cute habit of his. He ran his hands along Taerae’s waist and pulled him in close. “Please say yes.”

Taerae answered with a kiss to his lips. He kissed him more in the elevator and against the inside of their hotel room door. In their king sized bed wrapped in the downy duvet and his arms. He kissed him until they were both exhausted.

However, now settled into the firm mattress and fingers loosely intertwined, they weren’t too exhausted to talk about their new friend. All of his charms and kindness. The commonalities they shared. The blush on his cheeks and his sweet smile. His honesty and his resilience.

His name lingered between them even once the conversation was through, yet the silence felt safe—safer than digging deeper into the curiosity they had for the younger man. It was best that way. After all, the love Taerae had always dreamed of was lying right next to him. They felt whole because they had each other, and once something is whole, it doesn’t need anything else.

Right?

They were enamored by Park Gunwook. Maybe even swept off their feet. But they would both pretend their feet were still planted on the ground.

♡

Taerae groaned for probably the fifth time that early afternoon. “My feet are killing me, Matt. Can’t you use your big muscles to carry me?” he whined. 

“This hike isn’t even that bad,” Matthew chuckled, stopping to look back at Taerae who was bent over with his hands on his knees. “I literally chose the flattest trail.” He approached him to gently rub at his back before grabbing his arms and raising them. Taerae stood up straight, both of them now eye to eye. “This might help you breathe a bit easier. It expands your ribcage.”

He took a deep breath, smiling softly at Matthew. “You’re right,” he said gently. He leaned forward to press his lips to his, lowering his hands to rest on his shoulders. “Sorry I keep complaining. I’m trying to enjoy this for you. I know you like it.”

“We’ll do something you enjoy later,” Matthew assured him. He rubbed his hips gently with his thumbs. “The weather is great though. Isn’t it?”

“It’s perfect,” he agreed. He kissed him one more time before pulling away so they could continue walking the trail.

The view was perfect as well. Miles of lush, emerald grass and serene waves. Taerae almost felt ridiculous for complaining about the hike when they were surrounded by such beauty. 

But his body really was killing him. So, once they returned to the hotel, they went straight to the sauna. He knew it was just what he needed to relieve his muscle tightness. It had been quite a while since he last visited a sauna, and doing it with Matthew made it extra special. Everything was a little extra special with Matthew.

This sauna specifically had wooden benches around the perimeter of the room and the lighting was dim. It was empty except for them. A private and cozy atmosphere. Just the right atmosphere for the celebrating couple on their anniversary trip to celebrate.

“Kissing you never gets old,” Matthew mumbled against his lips. He parted his lips in time with Taerae’s, welcoming his tongue into his mouth.

Taerae hummed softly into the kiss, his hand travelling along his torso. He could feel every curve of his chest through the shirt that clung to his body. It was sensual and romantic.

“Oh, I’m so sorry,” a voice suddenly said from the doorway. “I didn’t mean to interrupt, hyungs.”

They pulled away from each other immediately, even putting some space between them on the bench. Taerae stared in shock at the man standing there. He pushed his damp bangs back from his face in embarrassment.

“Gunwook,” he said with round eyes. “No, don’t worry. We’re the weirdos making out in a public space.”

“Exactly,” Matthew added with a little laugh. He was a lot less embarrassed than Taerae somehow. “Please. Join us.”

Chuckling softly, Gunwook sat down on the bench across the room from them. He wasn’t all that far away, however, since it was a small room. “For the record. It was really hot,” he said with a tiny smirk. “Not that I was eavesdropping.” 

Grabbing the bottom of his shirt, he pulled it over his head, now sitting in only his shorts. He slung a small towel around his neck.

Taerae quickly looked away to lock eyes with his husband. He could feel the heat travelling down his neck. On the other hand, Matthew was completely amused by Gunwook’s words. He laughed in surprise, sparkling white teeth on full display. It was a rare, unabashed Matthew laugh. His favorite song.

“Did you abandon your friends again, Gunwook?” Matthew asked, his smile still a mile wide.

“I spent the morning with them. We ate breakfast here at the hotel and then hung at the beach again,” he explained. “I needed some time alone.”

“Ah, sorry you couldn’t have your alone time here,” Taerae said. He kept his eyes locked on Gunwook’s face and definitely didn’t steal glances at his toned upper body. “Instead you get more time with us.”

“My new favorite couple.” Gunwook said sweetly. “That’s even better than alone time.”

Matthew chuckled softly next to him. When he looked over at him, he could see that his eyes too were wandering along Gunwook’s body. Taerae looked away as if he didn’t notice a thing.

“Do you have a boyfriend, Gunwook? Or girlfriend?” Taerae asked suddenly.

He raised his eyebrows. “Oh. No. I don’t have a boyfriend,” he admitted. “And definitely not a girlfriend. I’m really gay.” He looked down at his hands, picking at his fingernails. A little bitter laugh escaped his lips. “I was literally just thinking earlier about how back in high school the kids would say I turned out gay because I spent too much time with girls. I was the only boy on the dance team… and the debate club.”

Matthew sat up straight, eyes as round as golf balls. “You danced? Do you still?” he asked, voice going up a few pitches. “Why didn’t you mention that when I told you I’m a dance teacher?”

Gunwook waved his hand. “No, no. I just did it for fun. I haven’t danced in years.”

“I’m getting you to dance with me before this trip is over,” he said enthusiastically.

The younger man’s cheeks went beet red. “Dance with you?” He shyly smiled. “Yeah. Okay. I’ll dance with you and play guitar with Taerae hyung. This all sounds great.”

Taerae giddily laughed, brushing his hair from his forehead again. Gunwook’s eyes were glued to him as he ran his fingers through his hair. He stared back at him, heart pounding in his chest.

Thankfully, Matthew diverted his attention from him by asking more questions about dancing. He listened to the two of them ramble about their shared love for dance and music. How Gunwook used music in support groups with the kids he worked with. How Matthew was now teaching small children how to dance at a local studio once a week. Their eyes were twinkling, and he enjoyed every moment of watching them talk about their passions.

“Your jobs are so exciting. I wish I had fun stories to tell,” joked Taerae once comfortable silence settled between them.

“Your job may not be exciting, but it is sexy, hyung,” chuckled Gunwook, looking at him with the same intense gaze as before. “You probably look hot in a suit too.”

Taerae’s mouth gaped open. “Oh. Well, uh—”

“He is hot in a suit,” his husband confirmed. He playfully elbowed his side. “The sexiest marketing manager in the world.”

Taerae rolled his eyes and huffed. He prayed they couldn’t tell how flustered he was. “You two are ridiculous,” he laughed. He looked down at the floor to avoid their eyes. He could still feel him staring. “I rarely ever wear a suit. I work from home half the time now.”

Gunwook only chuckled more in response. A moment later, the door to the sauna was opening, an older man walking in and sitting down. With the new body entering the space, Gunwook did finally divert his eyes from Taerae, but not to look at the man. 

To look at Matthew.

The emotion in his eyes was just as profound. Soft and yearning. But Taerae couldn’t begin to understand what he was longing for, what he could possibly want from two men he had only just met the night before. He wouldn’t try to understand. Instead, he looked away.

“Matt,” he whispered, leaning closer to him. He stroked his arm with feather-light fingertips. “I’m really hungry. Do you want to wash up and order an early dinner?”

Matthew immediately nodded, lovingly smiling at him. He turned to Gunwook. “We’ll see you soon,” he said before standing up with Taerae on his arm. “For dancing and guitar jamming.”

Nodding in agreement, Gunwook grinned up at the two of them. “Absolutely. I’ll see you later, hyungs.”

As they walked out the door, Taerae glanced back at him one last time. Gunwook offered him a small wave and another genuine smile. His heart pounded again.

“What are you thinking for dinner?” Matthew asked when they returned to their room. He pulled his shirt off, his skin shiny with sweat. “Maybe something light like salads and chicken. Or—”

Pushing him against the wall, Taerae slammed his lips to Matthew’s so aggressively that it almost hurt. His fingers groped his chest and arms and moved across his skin with a hurriedness as if he was discovering it for the first time, as if he had never touched him before.

“What’s gotten into you?” Matthew breathed out as Taerae moved lower and lower, lips and tongue exploring his chest. “Not that I’m complaining.” He ran his fingers through Taerae’s hair once his knees were now sinking into the cushiony carpet of their room. He smirked down at him. “Does the sauna turn you on?”

Taerae pulled away from where he was pressing kisses to Matthew’s thigh. He peered up at him through his eyelashes. “You turn me on,” he whispered.

Matthew’s mouth was slightly opening as if he was about to say something else, and then closing as if he changed his mind. His fingertips trailed from Taerae’s hair to his cheek and along his jaw. Slowly, he pressed his thumb into his lover’s mouth. Taerae closed his eyes.

“Only me?”

Instantly, he opened his eyes again. They locked with Matthew’s eyes as his thumb popped back out of his mouth. The question was practically echoing in his ears and the answer went unsaid.

His eyes were closed once again as he soon took Matthew into his mouth. He slowly moved his head, letting his mind go blank as the pleasure of pleasing his husband consumed him. Only the beautiful sound of Matthew’s moans filled his ears now.

“Only you,” Taerae finally whispered later in the night.

The room was dark now. They lay in the bed together, bodies parallel and faces inches apart. They wore each other’s clothes and the room smelled of a lavender mist Taerae had sprayed. Their stomachs were full from the dinner they ate and their hair was slightly damp from the shower they took before it.

It was early in the evening, but they were exhausted. Their muscles still ached from the hike, and their minds were still endlessly stirring.

Matthew stared back at him. He knew what he meant by the two words. He remembered his own question from earlier as well. It too had echoed in his ears. And he stared back at him like he didn’t believe him. Like he knew he was lying. 

But he knew his Taerae well. He wasn’t lying to hurt him—he was lying to protect them and the love they had built. It was sacred. It was theirs, and not for anyone else to touch. Their love wasn’t fragile, but Taerae couldn’t afford to let anything break it. It is the most valuable part of his life. It is irreplaceable.

Sometimes he swears Matthew knows him better than he knows himself. When he looks into his eyes, it feels like he is searching his soul, attempting to pull out all his unspoken thoughts and desires that he guards. All of his fantasies that are better off staying in his head. 

So he closed his eyes.

“I always choose you,” Taerae quietly added.

He could still feel him watching. Then, a moment later, a kiss was pressed to his forehead. Tender. Reassuring. Understanding, with the many uncertain yet alike feelings bottled in their chests. They were better sealed shut, remaining untouched and hidden away before they could swell into something more. Until they were forgotten.

If only it were that easy.

♡

While they were still dating, Taerae had only ever really seen Matthew dance for an audience or during the few times he would sit in on one of his classes to watch him teach. He moved his body with precision and intention. Whether it was to impress or entertain, he perfected his performance.

At their wedding reception, however, there was nobody to impress. He wasn’t there to entertain anyone—except maybe his husband. And Taerae was beyond entertained. He giggled as Matthew tugged at his tie to pull him closer, swaying his hips to one of the ridiculous pop songs that he had chosen for the celebration. All he could do was dance along with him and call him an idiot.

He danced like he didn’t care who was watching. He probably didn’t care who was watching. He was in his own little world with his lover. With abandon, he pulled the goofiest moves Taerae had ever seen him do.

Since then, it became an evening tradition for them to play more ridiculous pop songs while preparing dinner. Matthew cooked and Taerae cleaned, and some nights, they also danced. Sometimes their dance moves were big and outrageous, spinning each other and jumping around. Sometimes they danced slowly and intimately, wrapped in each other’s arms as the food cooked or the dishes soaked. On the nights when they were especially exhausted after a long day of work, they simply hummed and swayed where they stood at the kitchen counters.

Dancing was a joy of Matthew’s that became a joy of Taerae’s. Watching him spread that joy also on their anniversary trip made the biggest smile spread across his face where he sat nearby.

Earlier that day, they had messaged in their group chat with Gunwook about meeting at a pub for drinks and dancing. Although Matthew said that his friends were more than welcome to join them, Gunwook showed up by himself. He walked in with his hair styled up and off of his forehead and wearing a tight shirt with a brown racer jacket over it. Taerae’s mouth dropped open when he saw him.  He was relieved to see that he wasn’t the only one, Matthew staring with round eyes next to him. 

Taerae mentioned having soju, his favorite bar drink, to which they both agreed. After a few shots, Matthew was attempting to drag both of them to the merely empty dance floor. Taerae insisted on staying right where he was while Gunwook followed without hesitation.

The music was not modern. In fact, the songs were so outdated and obscure that even Taerae, who especially enjoys old music, didn’t know a single one. However, it didn’t stop the two of them from dancing and having the time of their lives.

The moment they sauntered onto the dance floor, it was as if a curtain was pulled around them. They were no longer acknowledging anyone else in the room. Only each other. Once again, Matthew danced and was in his own world, except this time, Gunwook was in it too.

Taerae smiled to himself as he watched them and couldn’t help but think that may have been what he and Matthew looked like at their wedding reception. Matthew had tunnel vision for him that entire day, but especially when they were dancing that evening. There were countless bodies around them, close friends and family, but he only wanted to dance with Taerae. He only looked at him.

Now that Gunwook was the center of his attention in this little Jeju pub, Taerae realized again that he should probably be jealous. He should be jealous of the way Matthew was looking at him with those teasing coquettish eyes and coy smile. The way their bodies flowed in synchronicity, not quite moving the same but in perfect rhythm with each other. He should be jealous, but instead he was looking at his husband with another man and thinking, that looks familiar because it looks like us.

Even when he tried, he couldn’t make himself feel it, that bitter jealous feeling. He couldn’t look at Gunwook with any trace of malice because somehow, even though this man was practically still a stranger, he trusted him with Matthew and (of course) trusted Matthew with him.

He watched from his seat with a calm curiosity as the two of them never crossed any lines. They never touched nor danced too intimately, but their eyes were speaking for them. Taerae turned to the table and poured himself another shot before he could try to understand what their eyes were even saying.

As he threw the shot back, his eyes connected with Gunwook’s. He was looking over Matthew’s shoulder at him, and his eyes continued to speak the same language they were speaking with his husband. Taerae only softly smiled at him and then turned away again.

Later in the evening, after many shots of soju that left them all three feeling buzzed, they left the pub together and went on their way towards the hotel. They asked Gunwook to join them in their room, telling him that Taerae could teach him something new on the guitar or simply play around with it. It came as no surprise that Gunwook agreed, eager to spend more time with the two of them.

On their walk down the street towards the hotel, Taerae hugged himself as a gentle breeze blew in. “I didn’t expect it to be chilly out tonight,” he muttered.

“Here. Take this, hyung.”

Taerae looked over at Gunwook who was stripping off his racer jacket. Before he could even begin to decline the offer, the younger man settled the jacket over his shoulders. He couldn’t deny that it was warm. It was warm from the heat of Gunwook’s body that had previously occupied it and it smelled like his perfume, and as he slipped his arms into his sleeves he decided that it fit well. It wasn’t his usual style, but it looked good on him. It felt nice. Comfortable.

“Thank you,” he whispered with a bashful smile, not quite looking at him as he said it.

But he did look at Matthew. He smiled fondly back at him. Taerae reached over and brushed his bangs from his sleepy eyes. He knew once they made it back to the room that he wouldn’t last long.

And he would be correct.

Upon arrival, Matthew immediately laid back on the small sofa near the bed and closed his eyes. Taerae teased him for being such a lightweight all of a sudden which was a claim that Matthew immediately denied.

“I’m only resting my eyes,” he insisted. “Just for a moment and then I’ll make us drinks. My Matthew specialty.”

Taerae had no idea what his Matthew specialty was, and they never found out. Minutes later, he was softly snoring from the sofa and the other two giggled at the way his mouth hung open. 

“Hyung looks cute like that,” Gunwook chuckled from where he sat with his legs crossed at the end of their bed. Taerae’s guitar was held gently in his arms. The strings were lightly strummed under his fingertips and thumb. It sounded like a lullaby.

“He really does,” Taerae agreed with a sweet smile, admiring his husband’s adorable expression. He turned to Gunwook. “Do you want some whiskey? Our room minibar here has the same kind as the restaurant we were at the other night.”

Gunwook’s eyes lit up. “That sounds great, hyung. Thank you,” he said. “I think this is the most I have ever drank. I guess that’s the vacation vibe though, isn’t it?”

“I’m not much of a drinker unless it’s for special occasions.”

Opening the small cabinet of alcohol and snacks that the hotel provided, Taerae pulled out the bottle of whiskey and two small glasses. He set them on the nearby table and filled them both a little under halfway.

“Is hanging out with me a special occasion, hyung?” teased Gunwook. 

Taerae didn’t even need to see his face to know that he was smirking ever so slightly. But when he turned, his suspicions were proven to be correct. Nobody had ever looked so adorably smug.

“It’s felt like it these past few days.”

He carried over the glasses and handed Gunwook his. They both sipped from their glasses with tiny smiles on their faces as he sat next to him at the edge of the mattress. The apples of Gunwook’s cheeks turned an even deeper red as they made eye contact.

He watched as Gunwook placed the glass on the bedside table so he could continue strumming at the guitar. His eyes locked on his fingers, admiring the way they danced across the strings.

“I don’t think you gave yourself enough credit when you said you were just okay at guitar,” Taerae said with a little chuckle. “What you’re playing sounds beautiful.”

“You’re too kind, hyung,” Gunwook said, ducking his head down to try and hide his blush. It was impossible to even in the dimly lit room. His cheeks burned bright.

Their voices remained low and soft to not disturb Matthew, much like the delicate plucking of the guitar strings. Like the music, the conversation stayed light and Taerae felt at ease. The alcohol warmed him up too, so much that he had to remove Gunwook’s racer jacket and put it on the back of the nearby chair. While he was up, he lowered the lights a bit more. He was getting sleepy as well, especially while hearing his husband’s snores increase in volume, but he wanted to stay awake.

He wanted Gunwook to stay.

Before their conversation took a slight shift, their positions in bed did as well. Taerae sat up in the bed with his back resting against the headboard, now being the one to play the guitar at a quiet volume. The younger man lay on his stomach next to him, his arms folded under his head. Resting the side of his face against his arms, he stared up at Taerae with his own sleepy eyes.

“Hyung,” he spoke gently.

Taerae looked down at him and hummed in acknowledgment.

“Do you ever wonder what your life would be like if you hadn’t met Matthew?” Gunwook continued. “I know that’s a random question.”

Chuckling, Taerae nodded in agreement. “It is random,” he said. “But I have wondered.” He leaned his head back against the headboard as he wondered once again, trying to imagine what his life would look like now if he didn’t have Matthew. It wasn’t an easy task. “As we told you, we met at the restaurant that he was a waiter at. But what I didn’t mention is that I almost didn’t eat there with my friends.”

Gunwook raised his eyebrows in interest. “Really?”

“There was a bit of a wait to be seated and my friends are impatient,” he snickered. His fingers were absent mindedly strumming at this point, a song he had played countless times before. “I wanted to stay. I knew the food was good, so I told them to suck it up.”

“As you should,” laughed Gunwook.

Taerae smiled down at him. “I don’t know if I would have ever met him if we had gone somewhere else. The timing was just right. We were one of his last tables for his shift and we ended up leaving around the time he got off. It was all so perfect,” he said with a dreamy look in his eyes. “I don’t like to imagine my life without him. I don’t know where I would be.”

“You wouldn’t be here,” whispered Gunwook. Slowly, he sat up and moved to sit next to him against the headboard. 

Taerae couldn’t help but suck in a breath as he felt so much closer now. He could once again smell his sweet perfume like he had on his jacket. Diverting his eyes down to the guitar, he hummed in acknowledgement of Gunwook's words.

“I feel really comfortable around you and Matthew,” Gunwook said. He bent his knees in front of himself, sitting in a relaxed manner. “Even though we’ve only met a couple days ago, I feel like I can… take off the mask.”

Raising his eyebrows in interest, Taerae let his head loll against the headboard to look towards him. “What do you mean?” he asked.

Gunwook held his gaze as he spoke. “There’s times with my friends or my family, or even strangers, when I feel that I need to prove myself. That I need to present myself in a certain way to be accepted or to feel like I belong.”  His sleepy eyes now also had a sadness creeping into them. “I don’t need to go to a therapist to know that feeling stems from years of not having a stable home.”

“I can only imagine how difficult that was on you,” whispered Taerae. His own eyes were full of empathy for the younger man. He looked like a boy right now—an emotionally scarred boy who was baring his soul. “I hope you continue to feel like you can let go of that burden around us. You don’t have to prove anything. We like you, Gunwook.”

Gunwook smiled at him. A genuine, relieved smile. “I like you too,” he said. “You’re really kind, hyung. You know, when I met Matthew on the beach, he talked about you like you were an angel on earth. He said you are easy to love.” He smiled even wider. “I can see why he feels that way.”

His fingers had stopped strumming the guitar strings completely at this point. It felt like for a moment the entire world stopped. Even Matthew’s snores. He glanced over at his husband whose eyes were still closed and mouth was still hung open. Still cute.

“I think you’re easy to love too, Gunwook,” he said after a few silent moments. He turned back towards him. “Just as you are.”

They stared into each other’s eyes for a few moments longer until the silence maybe got a bit too loud for Gunwook and he began clearing his throat to interrupt it. He looked down at the time on his phone. 2 AM. It turned out they had talked for a lot longer than they had realized.

“I should head back to my room. One of my nerdy friends wants to go to a museum before lunch tomorrow,” he said before climbing out of the bed. He stood at the foot of it with a little smirk. “I’m the nerdy friend.”

Taerae laughed and placed the guitar to the side before meeting him there where he stood. “Tonight was nice,” he said softly. “Thank you for going out with us.”

“Thank you for having me, hyung,” he said in a small, sweet voice.

He opened the door for Gunwook and wished him a good night’s rest as he began down the hall towards the elevator. He watched him go until he disappeared into the elevator, waving one last time before stepping back into his room.

On the walk over to Matthew, who he was going to gently shake awake so he could join him in bed, he stopped in his tracks at the sight of something that didn’t belong to him. Resting on the back of a chair was the brown racer jacket, still where he had put it earlier in the evening. 

He ran his fingers across the smooth material. Returning it would be an excuse to see him again. So he could simply return it. Or so he could talk with him more. Or so Gunwook could rest easy in their presence and take off his mask again. Or all of the above.

♡

The best way to have a deep conversation is over pancakes. According to Matthew.

It was the morning after they had a massive argument, early into their married life. They had spent the entire night going back and forth in a heated discussion, unable to compromise or communicate effectively. It was the biggest disagreement they had up to that point. Sure, they had bickered and aggravated each other before then, but this was the first time Taerae felt like he could cry out of frustration or slam a few doors.

He didn’t cry, nor did he slam any doors, but he did sleep with his back turned to Matthew. He was even petty enough to put a pillow between their bodies.

When he woke up, he was alone in the bed, and he immediately heard a pan clatter. Taerae began huffing as he threw the duvet off of himself and climbed out. He wasn’t a morning person anyways, so waking up to hear dishes clanging elicited an unwarranted rage in him.

His rage quickly transformed into amusement when he stepped into the kitchen. In the middle of the floor was a pan and under it pancake batter was splattered across the tiles. Matthew stood next to the mess with a disappointed little pout on his face. Giggling, Taerae walked around the mess to grab some paper towels. As he wiped the batter off the floor, he muttered that it was Matthew’s karma for being an idiot the night before. His husband didn’t think it was as funny as he did.

Fifteen minutes later, they sat together at the island in the kitchen eating pancakes that Taerae assisted him in preparing. There were no messes this time.

As they began eating, Matthew asked if he was ready to talk about it. While Taerae contemplated if he was or not, Matthew insisted that talking about it while eating pancakes was the best way to have the conversation. His words made him smile.

Pancakes weren’t necessary every time they had a challenging conversation nor was it needed to have a serious talk when they ate pancakes (which is often considering they are one of Matthew’s favorite foods). But in some moments, such as the following morning in the hotel dining area, the sight of pancakes made Taerae want to spill some of his thoughts. Like the batter on the kitchen tiles.

“Are we going to talk about how you flirted with Gunwook last night?” Taerae asked from across the table. He chuckled softly at the sight of Matthew’s cheeks full of fluffy pancake as his eyebrows furrowed in confusion. He looked like a bewildered little chipmunk.

“I was flirting?” he asked once he swallowed his bite. “When?”

“With your eyes,” he replied ever so casually. “While you were dancing with him.”

Matthew shoved more pancake into his mouth and shook his head. “I did no such thing,” he said with his mouth full. He smiled innocently. “Are we going to talk about you flirting with him?”

“Can you not talk with food in your mouth? You’re so gross.”

“You’re not answering me.”

“Was I flirting or was I just having a nice conversation with a nice guy?”

“Do you tell all nice guys that they’re easy to love?” Matthew snickered.

Taerae gasped, leaning over the table to intensely whisper to him. “You were awake? You heard that?”

“Yeah, I woke up to hear you two practically confessing your love,” he teased him. “And then you were stroking his jacket.”

He began laughing softly. It was so ridiculous that he couldn’t stifle it. “You really heard and saw everything, huh?”

Matthew snickered some more. “Not everything. But enough.” He poked at more pancake and dipped it in syrup before holding it out to Taerae.

He gave his husband a deadpan look and then accepted the bite. After quickly chewing and swallowing it, refusing to talk with food in his mouth like Matthew had, he said, “It wasn’t flirting though.”

“Didn’t we agree to always be honest with each other?”

His voice was still teasing, but there was a hint of sincerity behind them and his soft eyes. Taerae almost had to look away. But he refused to. He wouldn't this time. It’s a habit of Taerae’s to look away before he can understand what he is feeling, when something is a bit too complicated and he would rather pretend it’s not happening.

“Fine,” Taerae huffed in response. He kept his voice light and teasing as well. Teasing, but with a hint of sincerity. “I was flirting a little, but you can’t deny you were too.”

Matthew reached across the table to take his hand. He gave it a tiny squeeze, his thumb stroking his fingers. “Since you admitted it, I will too,” he said. “But you’re my honey.”

His eyes turned to crescents at the use of his pet name. “I am your honey,” he cooed. He reached across the table as well, squishing his face in his large hand until his lips were puckered cutely. “And you're mine. Only mine.” He leaned across the table to sweetly press his lips to his. 

“I always interrupt you two when you’re kissing.”

Speaking of him.

Both of their heads whipped to look at Gunwook who stood next to their table. His cheeks were rosy and his smile was small and shy. Still dressed in pajama pants and a t-shirt, and hair sticking up in a few places, he looked absolutely darling. He also had a plate of food in his hands. 

Pancakes.

“Starting to think it’s intentional,” Matthew joked.

Gunwook ducked his head, cheeks turning a darker shade of pink. Taerae gazed back across the table at his husband, pleased to find that he was moments from combusting because of how cute the younger guy was. He would tease him for that later too.

“Are you still going to the museum today?” he asked Gunwook. “Your nerd museum.”

He giggled in response. (Taerae thought he was extra cute today.) “I am, yeah. My friends aren’t thrilled about it, but I’m ready to geek out,” he said with his big toothy smile. “What are your plans, hyungs? Something romantic, I’m assuming?”

“Unless ATV riding is considered romantic, then no,” Taerae laughed. He looked at Matthew who was already watching him with fondness. “But it will be really fun.”

“You’ll make it romantic,” Gunwook said softly. “I can feel the love when I’m around you two. It’s just natural, hyungs.”

(He was extra, extra cute today.)

Before either of them could respond, he cleared his throat and added, “I don’t know what your plans are for tonight, but my friends want to go down to the hotel pool. The pool hours were extended to 11 for tonight.” He nodded over at where they were sitting across the room. Five youthful boys in pajamas, around a table and eating as if it was the first time they had in days. “We’ll be there if you want to join us.”

Matthew brightly smiled up at him. “Sounds fun,” he said before glancing at Taerae. His smile turned to a cheeky smirk. “We’ll see how exhausted this one is after the ATVs.”

Taerae scoffed. “I’ll be fine, dummy.” His expression, and voice, softened as he then spoke to Gunwook. “We’ll see you there.”

Gunwook bit his lip, as if trying to contain his excitement. To hold back how he actually wanted to react to their words. “Have fun today, hyungs,” he said with the subtlest of winks before striding towards his friends.

Once he was far enough away, Matthew smirked again.

“Stop looking at me like that,” Taerae huffed, poking at his food. “Dummy.”

“Do you think he was winking at me or you?”

“Matthew,” he said with wide eyes. He looked over his shoulder at Gunwook and his friends who were completely oblivious and hadn’t heard a thing. After all, the dining hall was busy and loud. “Shut up.”

“Make me.”

As it turns out, ATV riding can be romantic. The weather was perfect, warm with a clear blue sky above them. The green hills stretched for miles and they rode side by side over them. Seeing Matthew’s smile, and how precious he looked in the bright blue helmet he wore, melted his heart. The straps on the side that met under his chin squished his cheeks. As soon as they got off the ATVs, Taerae kissed both of his soft cheeks and then his lips. Their helmets knocked together and they both giggled softly.

“God, I could marry you,” Matthew whispered. He cupped his face gently in the palm of his hand. “My Rae.”

Taerae rolled his eyes. “Oh, could you?” He leaned into the palm of his hand and closed his eyes, giddily giggling. “Since when?”

“Since forever.”

He pushed at Matthew’s shoulder, giggling at his cheesy words. When he opened his eyes, however, he was surprised to see his blushing cheeks and eyes brimmed with tears. 

Taerae pouted at him. “Why are you about to cry?” he whispered. He reached out and brushed Matthew’s bangs from his eyes. “You do know we’re married, right? Or are you suffering with memory loss? Maybe spending our anniversary at a hospital wasn’t a joke after all.”

Huffing, Matthew pushed at his shoulder right back. “Why can’t you let me be romantic?” he laughed. He wiped his eyes with the sleeve of his shirt. “I just… can’t believe it’s real sometimes, you know?” He sniffled. “I’m lucky to have you.”

“I’m the lucky one,” Taerae whispered in response. He grabbed his hand gently and gave it a little squeeze. “I never thought I would find someone like you. Yet here you are. Here we are.”

And it’s enough. It will always be enough. More than enough.

Yet, that evening, there they were again. Taerae could feel the rapid beating of Matthew’s pulse in his wrist as they sat there together at the edge of the pool. His own heart couldn’t be ignored as it pounded like a drum. There were only ever two people that made his heart beat like that. One sat next to him.

The other was across the pool.

There they were again—hopelessly adoring Gunwook and pretending it didn’t mean a thing.

His tan skin was practically glowing and his wet hair was brushed back from his face. When he laughed, Taerae could have sworn he also heard angels singing. It wasn’t the first time he had been attracted to someone with a beautiful laugh.

“Are you even paying attention to the conversation?” Matthew mumbled next to him.

Taerae gave him the side eye. “Of course, I am,” he mumbled. He stroked Matthew’s arm gently. He still felt his pulse still beating quickly as his fingers glided over his wrist. “His friends are funny.”

“You haven’t been laughing,” chuckled Matthew. He leaned in closer to whisper to him. “Just staring at Gunwook.”

“Shut the fuck up.”

Matthew reached over and playfully pinched at his thigh. Which, of course, resulted in Taerae squeaking and jerking away from him and moving to put space between them. Which, of course, drew in the attention of Gunwook.

“Are you abusing Taerae hyung?” Gunwook smirked, swimming over to the edge. He folded his arms in the new space between them before resting his chin on top of them. His round, boba-like eyes shifted to Taerae. “Do I need to step in?”

“Maybe drown him for me?” Taerae smiled wide and toothy.

While his husband dramatically gasped next to him, Gunwook snickered. He was often amused by Taerae. More amused than Matthew was by his teasing—and silly threats.

“For Taerae hyung, anything,” he whispered, as if Matthew wasn’t sitting right there listening. “I’ll get him when he least expects it.” He turned to the other with an innocent smile and spoke at a normal volume. “Anyways. Completely unrelated to what we were talking about... Do you want to finally get in the water, hyung?”

Matthew laughed, kicking his foot in the water to splash the younger man. Taerae laughed right along with them before suddenly deciding to slide into the pool for the first time that evening. He winced at the temperature for a moment, but continued to sink into the water and gradually became more comfortable. 

The shirt he still had on became a darker shade of red as it got wet. While he was the only one at the pool wearing a shirt, he didn’t feel embarrassed about it. And Gunwook didn’t say a thing. He only smiled at Taerae as he stood next to him, just pleased that he had joined him.

Then, in the blink of an eye, Gunwook had turned back to Matthew and was grabbing his legs to pull him into the pool. Matthew’s surprised yelp echoed through the room. The water splashed in all directions around them as he practically landed on top of him.

“You little shit,” Matthew laughed before now purposely climbing on Gunwook to dunk him under the water.

Meanwhile Taerae laughed and backed away to watch from a distance. He wanted no part of their wrestling, and he was torn between finding them cute and wanting to get back out of the water to watch from the edge.

Moreso, he found them cute as they pushed each other in the water and laughed. As Gunwook’s cheeks turned red and Matthew glared at the other. They looked like kids.

But kids don’t look at each other like that or touch each other’s waists under the water like that. The energy between them was far from childlike. Watching them so close together, hands on each other’s bare skin and laughing between teasing words, it made a heat pool in his belly and an ache grow between his legs. It was becoming less cute.

He bit his lip and turned his face towards Gunwook’s friends instead. They were chatting still, completely unaware of the tension across the pool.

“You okay, Rae?”

Taerae’s head whipped back to its original position and he stared at Gunwook with round eyes. Those three words didn’t come from his husband. The petname didn’t come from his husband. No one else had ever called him that since it became Matthew’s sweet name for him. He never wanted anyone else to. Yet he didn’t hate it coming from Gunwook’s lips. In fact, he liked it a bit too much, his body continuing to react in a way he didn't expect it to.

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m good. I, um, need to use the bathroom though,” he said softly before rushing to pull himself out of the water. He was careful to keep his body angled away from them, quickly wrapping a towel around his waist.

Without glancing back, he exited the pool area and walked the short distance around the corner to the bathroom. As soon as he entered, he went to one of the sinks, splashing water in his face. While he leaned over the sink, however, the towel fell to the ground. The tent in his swim shorts was clear as day.

So clear that Matthew noticed it as soon as he also entered the bathroom.

“Need help?” Matthew asked with a little smirk on his face, eyes glancing downwards for a moment. He wasn’t subtle at all.

Taerae was too aroused to be embarrassed or pretend that it wasn’t what he wanted. He darted across the room and pushed him against the wall. His body grinded desperately against his as they kissed. 

“Aren’t you afraid of someone walking in?” Matthew mumbled, breaking the kiss long enough to get the words out.

Glancing at the door, Taerae smirked and shook his head. “No. Touch me.”

As eager as his husband now, Matthew pulled Taerae into the large stall. Although the bathroom was so clean that it was sparkling, there was still something so filthy about it. It was scandalous more than anything. They had never hooked up in public, but Taerae was thrilled by the thought of it suddenly. At the thought of someone hearing. Someone walking in. Someone seeing.

Someone.

Matthew spat into his hand before pushing it into Taerae’s wet shorts and enveloping his hard length in his fingers. As soon as he made contact, Taerae whined and wrapped his arms around him. He squeezed his eyes shut and pressed his open mouth against Matthew’s neck. He kissed and bit at his warm skin as Matthew’s hand stroked him. Their breathing got heavier as they both made an effort to stifle the moans threatening to come out.

Then the bathroom door creaked open. Taerae’s eyes went wide. Matthew, however, showed no signs of stopping as his hand remained where it was. He stretched his free arm in an attempt to pull the cracked stall door shut completely and lock it. Before he could, a specific someone stood a few feet from the stall. 

Matthew’s hand froze on the small metal latch of the door. “Oh.”

“Oh,” whispered Gunwook.

Though he was still fully clothed, Taerae felt bare as Gunwook’s eyes were practically drinking in the sight of him. As if he was undressing him with his eyes. As if he yearned to step forward and do it himself. 

Hesitantly reaching forward, he placed his hand over Matthew’s which still held the door. Matthew didn’t resist at all as Gunwook moved his hand to rest back on Taerae’s body while also moving into the stall with them. His hand stayed over Matthew’s, his thumb gently caressing his smaller fingers. All three of their eyes watched as his hand then glided from Matthew’s hand to Taerae’s shoulder and then to his face. It moved as if it had a mind of its own.

And when Taerae’s eyes locked with Gunwook’s again, he couldn’t tell what was going on in that mind of his. He couldn’t tell what his intentions were, but he knew every move of his hand was intentional. Every glide of his thumb across his cheek intentional, holding him as if he were fine china that could fall and break.

He held his face with the same tenderness that Matthew had only hours before that very same day. With that realization dawning on him, he knew he should pull away. He knew he should probably leave the stall entirely and tuck his feelings—their feelings—back in the corners of his heart, where they could hide yet linger close by.

His feet stayed planted there in that stall, however, and his whimpers filled the space as they both touched him. Matthew’s strokes. Gunwook’s tender touches. He closed his eyes, far too overwhelmed by their hands on him to handle them watching him too. To handle them watching as his back arched against the wall and his head tilted back. To handle the sight of Gunwook staring at his neck before tracing a vein in it with his nose, breathing in his sweet scent but never tasting him.

Moments later, he made a mess of his clothes and Matthew’s hand. He breathed heavily and pleasure coursed through his body. To his surprise, when he opened his eyes, their eyes were no longer on him but on each other. Though one of Gunwook’s hands was in Taerae’s hair, which he had brushed from his forehead, the other was cradling Matthew’s face as he had with his.

His eyes were still unreadable, but soft. His entire expression was soft, full of so much desire that it made the moment feel far less filthy than it should. As if they weren’t in a bathroom stall, but somewhere sacred. Somewhere hidden feelings can creep out of corners and into the light. If only for a moment.

Saying nothing still, Gunwook looked between them one last time. His hands slid off of them and rested at his sides before he retreated from the stall. Taerae listened as his footsteps got further away and then disappeared completely after the creaking of the door.

Sighing, he dropped his head onto Matthew’s shoulder. “That was really wrong,” he whispered. He nuzzled into him more as his husband wrapped an arm around his body.

“Then why did it feel right?” Matthew whispered back. “We should stop lying. We always swore to be honest, didn’t we?”

Taerae’s stomach twisted. He shook his head against his shoulder and closed his eyes. “But this is too much.”

“When have you ever thought love was too much?” Matthew asked in a soft voice. He wasn’t challenging him. He just knew his husband well. “All you’ve wanted since you were a kid was to find true love.”

“Can we call this love?” Taerae asked, snapping his head up to stare at him with round eyes. “You’re my love, Matthew. You’re what I was waiting for.”

Matthew stared back with a calmness. The same soft desire from before still lingered in his eyes. “I don’t think we can call it love,” he whispered after a moment. “But we can’t say it won’t be. We knew it was after a day when it was me and you. I know you feel it with him too. You have this whole time. Don’t lie to me again.”

Taerae couldn’t lie this time, not as he stared at him that way. So instead he nodded in agreement before muttering that he wanted to get cleaned up and get to their room. His husband couldn’t deny him that, not as he pouted at him that way. They had each other wrapped around their fingers.

And Gunwook had them wrapped around his.

When they returned to their room, the first thing Taerae noticed was the brown racer jacket still resting on the back of the chair. Matthew noticed too. He looked at it and then at his lover, the corners of his lips lifting ever so slightly. 

As they soon lay in bed together, snuggled closely under the sheets, Taerae watched as he typed out a message in the group chat they shared with the younger man. He tilted the screen towards him more and Taerae nodded in agreement once again.

thanks for letting rae borrow your jacket the other night. he forgot to return it to you… want to meet up tomorrow? :) 

♡

The moment he woke up, Taerae thought of him. Mostly he thought of the way he stared at them, watching them with hunger in his eyes. Like he was torn between wanting to spill out his emotions and crossing the line. His hands were gentle on their skin. They never went below their waists. His lips never touched them either—though they came close.

No words were spoken, but Taerae could see the admiration in his eyes. He looked at them like they were the most gorgeous men he’d ever seen. He looked with a yearning that had been there since they first sat across from him at the restaurant a few days prior.

He looked at them differently than he did at his friends. His entire face took on a different expression. As if the mask came off. Taerae understood his words a bit deeper now.

They made plans with the younger man to meet for lunch at a restaurant not far from their hotel. It was located right by the water and the weather was beautiful. So, Taerae arrived at the beach with his husband early to enjoy it until Gunwook arrived. 

They found a nice spot, perching themselves on a large rock at the edge of the water. The view in front of them was peaceful. The water was calm. It was a bit overcast and the breeze was light, causing goosebumps to appear on Matthew’s skin. Taerae noticed and handed him the brown racer jacket. It still smelled like Gunwook, and now a bit like Taerae too. He slid his arms into the sleeves with a soft smile on his face.

At the sound of laughter, both of their heads turned to look at a group of people further down the beach. Three girls and a guy. They were around their age, sitting in chairs and eating sandwiches. Also probably on a trip themselves.

“If that man over there flirted with me, how would you feel about it?” Matthew asked abruptly.

Taerae whipped his head back towards him. “All of a sudden?” he laughed, eyebrows furrowed. “Why are you asking that?”

Matthew grabbed his hand and squeezed his fingers. “Just humor me. How would you react if he came over here and asked me out or something?” He laughed as well, intertwining their fingers now.

“Well, I’d have to tell him to fuck off, honestly,” Taerae mumbled. He looked back over at the man across the beach. Though he was handsome, he wasn’t fond of the thought. “I’d tell him to find his own buff twink.”

“I am not a twink,” huffed Matthew, reaching over to shove Taerae’s shoulder. “I’m going to pretend you didn’t say that.”

Taerae looked back at Matthew with a devious little smirk on his face. With his free hand, he pinched his cheek. “My cute little buff twink.”

Matthew grabbed that hand as well and held it gently. “You’re really annoying, you know that?” he chuckled. “But anyways,  I would also tell him to fuck off if he flirted with you.”

Taerae slowly nodded. “Okay… And you’re making up fake scenarios, why?”

“Anytime someone has flirted with me in the past, you got annoyed or a little jealous,” he replied softly. “But when Gunwook flirts with me, you don’t tell him to fuck off. You smile. You like it.”

“And so do you.”

“You’re not wrong.”

Taerae pursed his lips and looked out at the water. He brushed his hair back from his face as his thoughts began to spiral again. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Matthew staring at him. Studying him. Waiting.

“I don’t know what you want me to say,” Taerae mumbled. He fidgeted with Matthew’s fingers as he watched the water rise and fall against the rocks. “I’m confused, Matt. I never pictured having feelings for another guy. I only pictured you, and growing old together and everything being simple. But this isn’t so simple.”

“Why isn’t it simple?” Matthew’s voice was soft. He leaned into Taerae and nudged his nose against his cheek. “We both like him and he obviously likes us. We can just let it be that for now. We don’t have to overthink it.”

“Easy for you to say,” Taerae huffed, giving him the side eye and pressing his wide lips together. “And how do we know he likes us and doesn’t just want to… I don’t know, get in our pants? This isn’t an open relationship, Matthew. We’re not going to hook up with every guy who takes interest in us. I don’t like the idea of that.”

“Obviously. I don’t either,” Matthew sighed. “But do you really think that’s what this is? Do you think that’s his goal? Getting in our pants?”

He didn’t actually think that one bit. He was only making excuses. Silly excuses for feelings he wanted to keep bottled up and hidden in the shadows. Silly excuses for Gunwook. Making excuses was easier than being honest.

Taerae clicked his tongue. “No,” he mumbled. “But what does he want if it’s not that? Hm?”

“Maybe… he wants to be loved,” whispered Matthew.

Taerae finally turned his face completely to look into his eyes. The words struck him in a way that made his stomach twist. He held Matthew’s hands tighter.

“And maybe,” continued Matthew, “he found two guys that he could love right back. You understand that desire. Being loved and being in love. On the night we met, you told me that was part of your dream. Maybe it’s his too.”

Taerae watched as Matthew brought one of his hands up to his lips and gently kissed it. Even after two years he had butterflies in his stomach at the touch of his lips. He opened his mouth to respond, but before he could get any words out—

“Hyungs!”

They both turned their heads in sync to look behind them. A few yards away, Gunwook stood looking adorable and sweet as ever. His hair looked especially soft today, his bangs hanging in his eyes. He also wore a light long sleeve shirt and baggy ripped jeans. He looked comfortable. And maybe a little nervous. A shy smile was on his face as he crept closer to them.

“I didn’t expect you to be here early. Looks like you had the same idea as me,” he said in a small voice.

Matthew smiled back at him. “Come sit with us,” he invited him, patting the space on the other side of him. He looked at Taerae for a moment as if he was silently asking permission and confirming it was okay.

Taerae nodded and returned his gaze to the younger. “It’s beautiful out here. Our reservation isn’t for another 15 minutes anyways.”

So Gunwook sat with them, crossing his legs and leaning back on his hands. Then he froze. His eyes had landed on Matthew again in realization.

“You’re wearing it,” he said. A bashful smile spread across his face as well as a redness in his cheeks. “You look better in it than I do.”

Matthew glanced down at the jacket. “Nonsense. It looked like it was made for you when you wore it,” he said.

The redness in the younger’s cheeks spread to his ears now. He bit his lip and looked down at his lap, fingers playing with the threads of a rip in his jeans.

Taerae thought his reaction to Matthew’s words was precious. He made eye contact with his husband who was smiling as fondly as he was. The air felt lighter now that he was there with them. All of the weight from their previous conversation was seemingly lifted off of them when he settled in next to them. His presence alone brought peace and clarity.

“I’m glad we could use it to see you again,” chuckled Matthew. He stroked his thumb against Taerae’s hand as he spoke. “It was a good excuse.”

“I would have seen you again regardless,” Gunwook chuckled lightly. His eyes shifted back up. He glanced between the two of them while chewing on his lip once again. “I wasn’t sure if you would want to see me again. After last night.”

It was bold of him to already address the elephant in the room. Taerae thought they’d at least wait until they ordered their meal.

“Did it look like we didn’t want you there?” asked Matthew with a tiny smile. He nudged the younger with his elbow. “I didn’t close the door on you. We let you in.”

“Why did you come in?” Taerae finally spoke up. “Why did you come into the stall with us?”

Gunwook stared into his eyes. “I wanted to,” he practically whispered. “I thought I would take the risk and be a part of the moment, but I also didn’t want to go too far. I really hope I didn’t.”

With a curious look, Matthew turned to his husband. Taerae smiled softly at him and shook his head. His heart was pounding out of his chest.

“No, I don’t think you went too far,” Taerae softly admitted. “I enjoyed it… even though I wasn’t sure what it meant.”

“I wasn’t sure either,” said Gunwook, “but I wanted to. And I’m glad I did.”

For a few moments, the only sounds were the steady waves of the water and the distant laughter of the group nearby again. Taerae also thought he could hear his own heart. But like the waves, his mind was calm now.

Then suddenly, Gunwook moved closer to Matthew. His shoulder brushed against his. Though his eyes were determined now, his voice remained gentle.

“I believe in fate, hyungs. I believe everything happens for a purpose, that we all meet for a reason. And I felt that when I met Matthew hyung on the beach and again with Taerae hyung that night at dinner. I know it’s only been a few days, but I don’t want this vacation to end and to go back home and not have you two in my life anymore,” he passionately spoke. He settled his hand on Matthew’s knee. “And I know you’re married and I’m maybe complicating things, but I want you both in any way you’ll let me. As friends. As something more. I just want you.”

The energy between them felt charged now as Matthew slid his hand over Gunwook’s. As his other hand squeezed Taerae’s.

Now that his feelings were all out in the open, a warmth spread in Taerae’s chest like a confidence growing. Like the confidence it would take for him to be honest—with them and himself.

“I want that too,” whispered Taerae. For a moment, his gaze wandered to Matthew who was already looking back at him in surprise. “We want that. I don’t know exactly what we want, but we want you. It can be that simple.”

Matthew smiled knowingly. “There’s no rush in figuring it out,” he assured his lover. He leaned over and kissed his cheek before turning back to Gunwook. “We can figure it out together. Even if we are two hours away from you.”

Gunwook huffed. “Don’t remind me. I was so disappointed when you said where you lived,” he pouted. “But I’ll take buses to get to hyungs. Or a train. Two hours isn’t so bad.”

A short laugh fell from Taerae’s lips, loud and giddy. “Why are you so adorable?” He reached across Matthew to ruffle the younger’s bangs. “We’d drive to you too, you know. Hyungs have a pretty cool car.”

Gunwook caught his hand with his free one. A wide gummy smile appeared on his face as he intertwined their fingers. “I can’t wait.”

Lunch with Gunwook was a lot different than the first meal they had shared with him only days earlier. They still sat across from him at the table, but this time his ankle was hooked with Taerae’s and he would occasionally reach across to touch Matthew’s smaller hands. Taerae noticed the way Gunwook stared at their hands as he held Matthew’s hand in his own and played with his fingers. He noticed the little smile on his face as he silently compared the size of their hands.

It was adorable.

Now that Gunwook was more openly affectionate with them, and now that their feelings came out of hiding, it felt like Taerae could relax. He didn’t have to worry about staring at Gunwook a bit too long or saying something a bit too sweet to be considered platonic.

He was still a little nervous about this. Whatever this was. But having Matthew by his side made it easier, knowing that their feelings were the same and they would walk this road together, no matter how uncertain it looked. Taerae didn’t know what to expect of the future, but he knew two facts for certain.

The first is that Matthew would be there. Regardless of how the future unfolds, he knows what he has with Matthew will remain constant and stable as it’s always been. Their love for one another is unchanging, and nothing could possibly come between it.

The second fact is that right now everything feels right. Although Taerae sometimes struggles to stay in the present because of his busy mind, he willed himself to look between them and take the moment in. He wanted to enjoy this. He wanted to enjoy the straightforward fact that there are real feelings between the three of them and that the butterflies in his stomach doubled in size. Matthew was right—it doesn’t need to be complicated. For now, it can just be this.

Three men who completely swept each other off their feet.

Once their plates were empty and the check was paid, they journeyed back to the water. Gunwook gently took Matthew’s hand again as they strolled along the sand. He made eye contact with Taerae as he did.

Taerae smiled. “I think you’re a little obsessed with Matthew’s hands, huh?” he chuckled.

Gunwook went pink and his feet slowly came to a stop. “Hyungs hands are small and cute.”

They both stopped with him, standing on either side of the younger. Matthew snickered at his words and sandwiched Gunwook’s hand between his. Gunwook went even more pink as the older rubbed at his hand and stepped closer to him.

“You know,” Gunwook whispered, “I’m going to miss you two a ton when I leave.” He reached out and grabbed Taerae's arm gently, tugging him closer to him and Matthew. They stood in a triangular shape now. So close to one another. “I kind of want something else to miss.”

Matthew tilted his head at him. “Something else?”

Judging by the way he glanced at both of their lips, Taerae quickly understood what he meant. His own cheeks flushed pink before he reached forward and delicately moved a strand of Gunwook’s hair. It wasn’t out of place. He just needed an excuse to touch him.

“Matthew kissed me on our first date,” Taerae said very matter-of-fact.

His husband’s eyes widened slightly, also understanding what Gunwook was implicating now.

“Which was also the first night you met,” giggled Gunwook. He leaned into Taerae’s hand as he touched his hair a second time. He enjoyed his attention. “I wanted to kiss the both of you on the beach that night we met. I knew it probably wasn’t a good idea at the time.”

“But now?” Matthew asked. He was practically fluttering his eyelashes at him. 

Taerae laughed at his husband, reaching over and playfully shoving his chest. Watching him flirt with Gunwook was cute, amusing, and embarrassing all at the same time.

“Now…” Gunwook softly started. He glanced down the beach. The group from before had now left and not another person was in sight, likely because of the rain that would soon be coming this way. It was only them, and the wind had stilled as if it was holding its breath for them. “Now I think it might be okay. Is it, hyungs?”

Taerae moved his hand to the nape of Gunwook’s neck. He gently stroked the ends of his hair with his thumb. “If our lunch was a date, then it’s okay with me.” He smiled over at Matthew. “I don’t just kiss anyone.”

Chuckling, Matthew leaned into him and wrapped his arm around his waist. It felt like an inside joke, one they’d share with Gunwook later.

“It was a date. Definitely,” said Gunwook with twinkling eyes. 

He wrapped his arm around Taerae as well, his hand gliding along the sleeve of his own jacket that Matthew still wore. They felt connected like this. Anchored together there on the beach.

Matthew reached up and touched Gunwook’s face, bringing his attention completely back to him. Taerae watched them as if he were in a trance. Although they were focused on each other, he still felt like he was a part of the moment with their arms around him. And as they slowly leaned in and connected their lips, he melted even more into their arms.

His hand fell from Gunwook’s hair and he wrapped his arm around him instead. He felt like a giant heater as he leaned into him. He was warm and safe, and he felt strangely like home.

They kissed with no rush. Their lips moved slowly, like they were savoring the taste of the other. Taerae couldn’t keep his eyes off them. If it were possible to join them and kiss them both at the same time, he absolutely would.

“Feeling left out over here,” pouted Taerae. His pout turned to a fond smile as they started giggling into the kiss and then turned to look at him.

Gunwook wasted no time. He captured his lips with his own quickly. They moved with a bit more of an urgency than they had with Matthew though. He kissed him eagerly, grasping Taerae’s face in his hand and pulling him in closer. It felt as if Gunwook not only wanted to taste him but completely devour him. And he would let him. In a heartbeat.

Still he could feel Matthew’s arm around him, his thumb rubbing his side. Soon he could also feel Matthew’s soft breath against the side of his face as he moved even closer to the two of them. As expected, nothing could come between their love. 

Gunwook didn’t disrupt it—he added to it.

“Not to ruin the moment,” Matthew whispered suddenly, “but I see rain clouds.”

They (regretfully) pulled apart and looked at the sky. Sure enough, the overcast sky was a bit darker now, and in perfect timing there was the distant rumbling of thunder.

“Do you want to go back to my room, hyungs?” asked Gunwook with an innocent little smile. The apples of his cheeks were bright red and his lips were shiny. “Just to talk and hang out? Maybe kiss more… to give me more to miss?”

Taerae didn’t glance at his husband, and frankly couldn’t even break his eyes away from Gunwook’s lips. He just nodded before standing slightly on his tiptoes to kiss him again. He couldn’t get enough. 

Matthew laughed softly next to them. “Calm down there, Rae,” he teased. “Let’s go before we get rained on.”

They indeed did share more kisses in Gunwook’s hotel bed. It reminded Taerae of the just kisses he and Matthew had shared in the beginning of their relationship. There were no expectations for something more. They just sat—and eventually laid—together in the bed and kissed to the sound of rain pattering against the window.

They kissed to kiss. As simple as that.

♡

Taerae will never forget the first time Matthew spent the night at his house after they had started dating. It was about a month after they initially met and they hadn’t planned for him to stay. 

It was a Friday night and Matthew arrived with takeout and a large vanilla shake for Taerae as well as a mint chocolate chip one for himself. The moment Taerae texted him saying it was a stressful day in the office, his boyfriend said he would come over and take care of him. So, he fed him, cleaned up the dishes they used, and then snuggled him in bed after he had taken a shower. He definitely felt cared for. And tremendously loved.

Before they knew it, it was nearing midnight. Taerae hugged him tightly around the waist there in his bed and asked him to stay. He told him that he had a toothbrush still in its package below his sink and comfortable clothes that would fit him. He insisted that it was too late to travel back home too, that it wouldn’t be safe. Though he did actually believe that was true, he mostly just didn’t want to let him go. He didn’t want to go to sleep alone. He thought he might sleep better with Matthew there beside him.

Matthew was convinced by his pouting lips. He got up from the bed and promised to return. He used his shower to wash off, changed into a pair of Taerae’s pajama bottoms and oversized t-shirt, brushed his teeth, and then climbed back into the bed with him where Taerae still lay half awake. He gazed at him with sleepy eyes and then nuzzled into him once he was settled into the sheets with him. Within minutes he was asleep.

He woke up again in the middle of the night and immediately giggled at Matthew’s snoring and his messy hair. He wanted to reach for his phone to snap a photo, but didn’t move in fear of accidentally waking him up. Instead he watched him sleep until his own eyes drifted shut again.

Taerae was also awake first that following morning. This time Matthew had his back turned to him. He slowly shuffled his body closer before sliding his arm around his waist and nuzzling his nose against the base of Matthew’s neck. He could smell his own body wash on his boyfriend’s body. He was warm too. Warm and right where he belonged.

I want every morning to feel like this. I don’t want a day to begin with him not by my side.

These thoughts found him again a couple years later. Yet the warm body next to his wasn’t his husband’s. It was a younger man who somehow managed to wiggle his way into their hearts in only a few days' time. He was warm like Matthew, but larger like a big teddy bear. He didn’t snore like Matthew, but his hair was just as messy as his where he lay facing towards Taerae. Once again, Taerae was tempted to snap a photo, but didn’t move a muscle.

He wasn’t brave enough to reach out and touch him either. As if they hadn’t kissed and cuddled that afternoon and evening before, he was nervous to move closer to him now. It suddenly dawned on him once again that this man who days ago was a stranger was now laying between them and dreaming of a future with them in it.

Only days ago, Taerae brought his husband on an anniversary trip to celebrate their love. And now, they were discovering another love. Something new, a little uncertain, and (contradictively) a little promising as well. 

He liked how this morning felt. It felt like his mornings with Matthew, but multiplied. And as Gunwook began blinking his eyes open, Taerae closed his eyes to pretend he was still sleeping like he used to with Matthew the first few times he slept over—before he eventually caught him in the act.

He could feel Gunwook shuffling next to him. Once his body stilled, he peaked his eyes open slightly to see that Gunwook had turned to face Matthew who lay on the other side of him. And then a moment later, he heard a little giggle.

“Good morning, hyung,” Gunwook whispered, his voice gravelly from sleep.

“Good morning,” Matthew whispered back. “I’ve been awake for a while… debating on if I should cuddle you or not.”

Taerae smiled at his words. Of course they were both awake and thinking the same things. Their friends often joked that the married couple were running on shared brain cells. He is starting to believe they’re onto something.

“You should,” replied Gunwook after a few moments.

Taerae watched as Matthew’s arm slid around Gunwook’s waist. Taerae felt jealous, but only because he was left out. But he kept up the act of being asleep, keeping completely still beside them.

“I feel like I’ve known you forever,” Matthew said. His fingers gently scratched his back through his t-shirt and Gunwook moved even closer to him. “I look into your eyes and they feel familiar. It’s odd, isn’t it?”

Same brain cells. For sure.

“I don’t think it is,” Gunwook responded. “I believe in soulmates, hyung. I always knew that when I met the one that it would feel like this.”

“The one?”

Gunwook snickered. “The two. I feel that way about both of you,” he said. He hummed in thought. “I told Yeojun about the situation a bit. After the… bathroom thing.” Taerae couldn’t see his face, but he could imagine that he was blushing. “He thought that maybe you two just wanted to have a threesome or something. I told him that you’re too in love with each other to mess around with anyone else.”

“You’re right,” said Matthew. “But now we’re questioning everything. You’ve really complicated things, Park Gunwook.”

An adorable giggle left Gunwook that made Taerae want to audibly coo, but he contained it.

“Do you believe in soulmates, hyung?”

“Not as much as Taerae. He’s been a romantic his entire life which is always a shock to people when they find out,” chuckled Matthew. “But I started to come around to the concept when I fell in love with him. I’d been in love before, but it felt different falling for him. He’s my person. I never doubted that.”

Taerae smiled even wider. He slowly moved his hand to cover his mouth to keep in more cooing or giggles. It never gets old hearing Matthew talk about how much he loves him. It never would.

“Do you think I could be your person too?” The younger one whispered so softly that Taerae almost couldn’t hear him. He said it like he was scared of the response or perhaps a little embarrassed to ask such a vulnerable question.

“You could,” Matthew replied just as softly.

There was the sound of a soft kiss a moment later. Taerae closed his eyes and listened to the kisses that followed. Sleepy and slow. 

“It’s your last day here,” Matthew said suddenly. “Will you spend it with us? We’re either going to the market or the waterfall today. Both, if we have the time.”

A disappointed huff left Gunwook. “I wish I could,” he said, and Taerae could hear the pout in his voice. “My day is packed with plans my friends made. But I’ll be free in the evening. I could sneak away then.”

“That would be perfect, Gunwookie,” Matthew replied softly. Taerae opened his eyes in time to see Matthew slide his hand under the younger man’s shirt and gently stroke his back.

Gunwook hummed, relaxing completely at his touch. “We could go to Seongsan Ilchulbong Peak. It’s quite the hike, but the sunset is even more gorgeous from there. It has a romantic vibe.”

“That does sound romantic,” Matthew agreed. “Taerae may not be thrilled about another hike, but I’m sure he’ll suffer for you.”

Okay, the act was up.

“Shut up,” Taerae snickered. “I’ll be fine, asshole.”

The both of them jumped at his voice. Gunwook giggled and turned onto his back to look at him, Matthew’s arm slipping out from under his shirt as he did. Matthew sat up and balanced on one of his elbows to peer over at him. Taerae smiled widely at the both of them before scooting closer. He sat up just enough to lean over and meet his husband halfway, pressing his lips to his.

He snickered even more when he looked down at Gunwook and saw him biting his lip and his cheeks blushing. “Enjoying the view?” Taerae teased him.

With a dopey little smile on his face, Gunwook ran his large hand along Taerae’s arm. He melted into his gentle touch against his bare skin. No man other than Matthew had ever touched him quite like this, so tender and soft.

“I think this is my new favorite view,” he whispered. His eyes shifted to Matthew who was watching him just the same. “I’ve never enjoyed sharing the bed with anyone until now. You two were really warm. And…” He traced circles on Taerae’s arm. “I didn’t want it to end.”

Taerae’s teasing smile softened. He reached forward and tilted Gunwook’s chin up with his fingertips before pressing a soft kiss against his lips. “We’d come back to your room tonight,” he said. He laid down his head on the pillow, his face inches from his, and practically wrapped his body around him. “If you let us.”

“I was already planning on dragging the both of you here, hyung,” giggled Gunwook. “It wasn’t even negotiable.”

Matthew turned onto his stomach and leaned on his elbows and forearms. He admired both of them with soft eyes before scooching over to attempt wrapping his arm around the both of them. His head found a comfy spot on Gunwook’s chest too.

They rested like that until Gunwook noticed the time and realized he needed to get ready. All three of them moved slowly. It went without saying that they wanted the morning to stretch as long as it could. Until they had to part ways.

They thought the evening would come quickly, but they would be mistaken. Their day stretched out as well, but in the best way. Taerae sat with his husband at the waterfall for a couple hours. He closed his eyes occasionally, enjoying the misty breeze blowing towards them. Matthew did most of the talking, voice soft as he brought up anything that came to his mind. Spending time with him like this was exactly why he wanted to go on this trip in the first place.

After that, they got a small lunch before going back to the hotel for an afternoon nap. When they woke up, they softly talked some more. No matter how much time they spent together, they always found something to talk about. 

Even if the topic made Taerae go red.

“You can’t deny it’s true,” Matthew giggled as he watched Taerae bury his face in the pillow.

“But I can. I will deny it,” he groaned, voice muffled. “Let’s not talk about it.”

“No, we are,” Matthew giggled more. He sat up slightly and rested his back against his now propped up pillow. “You got turned on almost every time we hung out with Gunwook. After first meeting him. At the sauna. The pool. I’m surprised you didn’t hop on my dick when we came back here this morning.”

Taerae popped his head up. “Seok Matthew!” he yelled before reaching over to shove at him. “That’s so crude. And not true either… Only half true.”

“Knew it,” Matthew smirked. “Should we unpack that more?”

Rolling his eyes, Taerae sat up and criss-crossed his legs. He was wearing a tiny pair of shorts now and an oversized shirt. Matthew wore the same. Cozy nap-time wear.

“Do you not get turned on by Gunwook? You called him attractive first,” Taerae asked with a smirk, leaning back on his hands. If they were going to have this conversation, he’d go all in now. 

“I never said I didn’t. I just wanted you to admit it,” he laughed.

Taerae clicked his tongue. “Okay. I admit it. Happy?” He bit his lip at the thought of it. “But I still stand by my no hook-up rule. I only go that far with someone I’m serious with. After marrying you, I didn’t even consider being intimate with anyone else.”

“I know, jagiya. We’re on the same page still,” agreed Matthew. He reached out and took Taerae’s hand into his. “But it is cute… you getting all worked up because of a younger guy.”

Taerae could feel his ears warming up now. “Not just any younger guy. He’s really special,” he said in a small voice. He looked down at their hands as their fingers intertwined. 

“You’re right about that,” Matthew said, mimicking his quiet voice. “So, we agree to just continue taking out the sexual tension on each other?”

Taerae raised his head with a cocked eyebrow. “Did you bring this up because you’re horny, Matthew?” he accused him with a wide smile creeping onto his face.

“I said no such thing,” Matthew said in a silly accent before suddenly laughing and pulling Taerae closer by his hand.

Taerae’s laugh blended with his as he settled into his lap, his legs framing his hips. He hummed and leaned into him when Matthew’s hands slid from his hips to his ass and teasingly squeezed him. It didn’t take much for Taerae to get worked up when it came to Matthew.

Or Gunwook apparently.

“Do you look forward to him touching you like this?” Matthew whispered against his neck

Taerae’s fingers curled into his hair as he rolled his hips once, slow and deliberate. “Maybe…”

Matthew’s breath hitched. He pulled his head back to look into Taerae’s eyes, and smiled fondly at the sight of his red skin.

“I love that you still blush like it’s our first time,” he chuckled. He reached up to cup the back of his neck and pulled him down to kiss him. Their kisses deepened quickly, Taerae tugging at his hair like he knew his lover liked it.

“It feels like the first time every time,” Taerae said before smirking slightly. “But better.”

Matthew let out a sound that was half a laugh and half a sigh. He kissed him again and then along his jaw. Taerae could only close his eyes and lean into his every touch and kiss. Just as he had closed his eyes and let the wind by the waterfall wash over him a few hours prior, he now enjoyed the feeling of Matthew’s affection completely enveloping him. It was as gentle and refreshing as the breeze.

And just as the breeze picked up, so did Matthew’s affection for Taerae as he soon would be laid out in the bed, surrendering completely to him. With the side of his face pressed into the pillow, legs spread, and back arched, he slowly moved his hips back to meet Matthew’s devotion over and over again. Still slow and calculated, he pushed back into him, and took in the overwhelming sensation of his lover inside of him.

His body shook with a chill as Matthew’s hand pressed into his back, sliding his shirt further up his torso to reveal more of his skin. He could feel each finger press into the muscles of his back as Matthew’s other fingers held his hip.

“You’re driving me crazy,” whimpered Taerae. He let out a strained moan as Matthew’s cock dragged slowly out of him before just as slowly pushing back in. His body was used to his size, but never used to the sensation. “Can you move any slower?”

Matthew laughed softly from behind him. “Do you want me to prove it?” he teased before doing just that, moving his length out of him completely at an un-godly slow speed. 

His self-control was something Taerae could never understand. Anytime Taerae tops, he loses his mind the moment he is inside his husband, moving desperately and with haste to reach his release and bring Matthew to his. But Matthew takes his time. Not every time, but most times. This was one of those times.

Taerae whined pitifully. He looked over his shoulder at him with a pout. “If you don’t get back inside of me right now, I’ll cry,” he huffed at him. “You feel too good, Matthew. I need it.”

Matthew’s eyes widened at his words before he grabbed his hips again and easily moved back into him. Still slow, but now with more of an urgency to make his love feel pleasure again.

“Tell me how you want it then, jagiya,” Matthew sighed, again gliding his hand up the length of his back until his fingertips reached his bunched up shirt.

He made eye contact with him again. “Do it like you would to Gunwook… Or how you’d like him to do it to you.”

His words were unexpected to Matthew. Dirty talk was usually pretty limited for Taerae. He didn’t like to force anything. He only said what he felt in the moment. And right now, he was thinking of him. 

“Fuck,” Matthew groaned as he pushed into him harder, head falling back. “I haven’t even thought about that.”

“Think about it now,” sighed Taerae. He drove his hips back again. “How would you like it with Gunwook? Hm?”

Matthew gulped and closed his eyes. Taerae watched him closely as his hand pressed harder into his back and he pushed into him until he was completely bottomed out. They moaned in sync, loud and clear.

“You’re so naughty for this,” Matthew breathily laughed.

“And so are you.” He grabbed the sheets tightly as he felt him begin to move again. “Matthew, show me.”

In an instant, he leaned down and began pressing tender kisses to his back. His hands loosened their grip on him, gently holding him as he rolled his hips into him.

It wasn’t the reaction Taerae expected in response to his challenging words, but it was better. It was as if he was further proving his emotional connection to Gunwook. Taerae already knew that it wasn’t purely a sexual attraction. In fact, Matthew confirmed only a moment ago that he hadn’t even thought about having sex with Gunwook. But now, after telling him to treat him as he would the younger, he is worshipping his body and whispering sweet words and Taerae was melting completely.

As he always did with Matthew. As he always did with Gunwook. As they did with each other.

“Matthew,” Taerae moaned as Matthew pulled him upwards, both of them sitting up in this new position. He tugged Taerae’s shirt off of him and dropped it to the side so that his bare back now pressed against Matthew’s chest. “You’re so deep.”

He bounced on him eagerly, reaching back to thread his fingers through Matthew’s hair. Matthew helped him through the motions, still holding him as he moved on top of him.

“You want him this deep in you, Matthew?” he asked, glancing back at his blissed out face.

“Taerae,” he whined before pushing him back down onto the bed and thrusting into him with even more passion. 

Uncontrollably, Taerae whimpered and moaned into the sheets, becoming completely pliant under him. His legs wanted to give up on him as he spread them further, but Matthew’s grip on his hips kept him up.

“I want you to- ah, fuck,” whimpered Taerae. His legs were sliding out from under him, but Matthew lifted his hips to meet his eagerly. “Come in my mouth, Matthew. Can you please?”

“You’re so insane today,” Matthew moaned as he pulled out of him after a few more thrusts, and then flipped Taerae onto his back. He began climbing up Taerae’s body until he straddled his chest.

It wasn’t their first time doing this exact thing, and that was clear as Taerae opened his mouth and held his tongue out of his mouth. His eyes stared up at Matthew with a seductiveness that sent him right over the edge as he moved his hand quickly along his shaft. He painted his chin and tongue, and Taerae closed his eyes as he tasted him.

“You’re beautiful, Taerae. Insane and beautiful,” he laughed softly. He swiped his thumb across his chin before pressing it into his mouth. Taerae closed his smiling lips around it, and Matthew felt like he could get hard again from that alone. “Can I suck you off, baby?”

Taerae nodded as Matthew popped his thumb out of his mouth. “Please,” he whispered, his hands reaching up to run them along his biceps. 

His hands found his hair again, their favorite place to go, once Matthew’s lips were wrapped around him. His mouth was warm as he bobbed his head up and down, and Taerae was incredibly close. He also told him he was a moment later, pulling at his hair and the sheet underneath them, but Matthew kept going. He kept going until he released in his mouth.

And he swallowed every drop, which would have been hot if it weren’t for the way he was cutely scrunching his nose. Taerae dopily smiled and stroked back Matthew’s hair as he pulled off of him.

“Come here, jagiya,” Taerae sighed, stretching out his arms to him.

Matthew sighed as he fell into his embrace. He wrapped his arm around Taerae’s waist and rested his head on his shoulder, humming softly as his husband rubbed his shoulder.

“So we got our Gunwook sexual tension out of the way,” chuckled Matthew. He nuzzled his nose into Taerae’s collarbone and breathed in his pretty scent. 

“You mean your Gunwook sexual tension,” Taerae teased, pinching Matthew’s side. “I was perfectly fine until you started touching my butt.”

Matthew giggled and turned onto his stomach to get a better look at him. He leaned over and kissed him sweetly on his cheek, and Taerae stared into his eyes with so much love and endearment.

“I’m really happy we could have this time together,” Matthew said softly. He laid back down on his side next to him and affectionately rubbed Taerae’s chest. “And I don’t mean only the sex we just had, but this entire trip… The sex was amazing though.” He laughed at his own words as Taerae only rolled his eyes. “It’s not the trip we expected it to be, but it’s really proven that we’re perfect for each other.”

Taerae raised his eyebrows at him, a tiny smirk on his face. “Please elaborate.”

“You’re cute,” giggled Matthew. He touched the side of his face gently and pinched his cheek. “We communicate well… most of the time. We could improve on that. But once we do communicate, we understand each other. We get each other and fall in love with the same things.”

“The same Gunwooks.”

Matthew snickered and nodded. “The same Gunwooks, yep.”

Closing his eyes and smiling softly, Taerae leaned into the kiss Matthew pressed to his temple. He loved when he was like this, showering him with kisses all over his face. He loved that he still gave his husband cuteness aggression with the little things he said. It was his goal to have that effect on him even when they’re old and gray.

“I’m excited to keep living life with you, and to see where this relationship with Gunwook takes us after we leave Jeju,” continued Matthew, his voice full of enthusiasm. He propped himself up on his elbow. “We’re in this together and we’ll do it our way, yeah? We’ll do what makes us happy and what feels right. Which means we need to keep being honest with each other, and trust each other. Do you promise you’ll do that?”

Taerae smiled wide, brushing Matthew’s hair back from his forehead. “I promise to try my best, honey,” he said. “You always get so expressive and poetic after sex.”

Matthew wiggled his eyebrows at him. “You inspire me,” he whispered, leaning in closer to his lips but not closing the distance between them.

“Oh?” Taerae whispered back. His eyes were shining. “Flattery will get you everywhere, Matthew.”

Glancing down at his lips, Matthew let out a breathy little chuckle. “Is that so?”

Taerae grabbed the back of his neck and pulled him down to close the space between them. He moved his lips slowly against his smiling ones. With his chest now against his as well, it felt like their hearts were playing a tennis match, beating hard in a perfect rhythm.

Suddenly, one of their phones began loudly buzzing on the bedside table. The both of them huffed in frustration thinking it was Gyuvin calling again. He had called earlier during their lunch with an unnecessarily long story about Ricky and grocery shopping. (Taerae already forgot most of the details, but did know that it was domestic and cute, and Gyuvin wanted to propose. Matthew thought it was about time.)

But Matthew picked up his phone to discover that it was instead someone else. A silly little smile appeared on his face instantly and Taerae didn’t even need to see the phone to know who it was.

“Hey bro,” Matthew answered in English.

He put the phone on speaker just in time to hear Gunwook’s awkward response. “Eh?” He chuckled softly. “Bro? Have I been put back in the friendzone since this morning?”

Taerae clicked his tongue at his husband. “He uses it as a term of endearment, unfortunately,” he sighed, reaching over to poke at Matthew’s chest just because he could.

“Okay, bro.” Gunwook chuckled even more. “I escaped from my friends if you two are ready to go on that hike to the peak now.”

“Already? What time is it? How long were we going at it?” Taerae whispered with wide eyes.

He had never been good at whispering.

“Going at it?” giggled Gunwook on the other side of the phone.

Taerae’s face went beet red while Matthew only laughed hysterically. At least he found this amusing.

“Yes. Thank you, Taerae, for exposing us,” Matthew said with a massive grin. “We’ll be ready in a half hour or so. Want to meet us in the lobby?”

Clearing his throat, and holding back more giggles, Gunwook replied, “That sounds great, hyung. I’ll see you both then, and I definitely won’t be thinking about you two… going at it.”

Taerae groaned, rolling over to stuff his face into the pillow. Ever so fond, Matthew rubbed his back while saying his goodbyes to the younger.

In only about twenty minutes, they managed to pull themselves out of the bed, clean themselves up, and look presentable enough to go out in public. Taerae had given up on trying to make his hair look good and settled on wearing a bright red beanie that Hao had gifted him for Christmas. It was his favorite color, and it was rare to ever see him not wearing at least one red article of clothing. 

Matthew smiled when he saw him put it on, grabbing the sides of his head and pulling him in to kiss his forehead. “Stop being so fucking cute,” he playfully growled through his teeth. He shook Taerae’s head, watching in amusement as Taerae screwed his face before pushing him away.

Taerae tried to hide his smile as he reached for Matthew’s hand and intertwined their fingers, but his dimples betrayed him. “Let’s go,” he huffed.

Already waiting for them in the lobby, Gunwook greeted them with big bear hugs and a gummy smile. Though he wasn’t much younger than them, it was when he smiled like that when Taerae could see the kid in him, like he could imagine exactly how he was as a child and teenager.

As Gunwook had told them, his upbringing wasn’t a walk in the park. Much like the hike to the peak, it was a challenge. It had an incline and stairs and Taerae was huffing only 15 minutes into it. But then he’d look at the younger, chatting and smiling with his face all pink. It wasn’t easy, but Gunwook kept going with a positive spirit.

Despite every trial, Gunwook didn’t lose his spark. And despite the steepness of the trail currently, his stamina was unwavering.

Taerae suddenly stopped, hands behind his head like Matthew had told him to during their hike days earlier. Both Gunwook and his husband noticed his absence next to them almost immediately, also pausing their steps a few feet in front of him before looking back.

“You okay, hyung?” Gunwook asked sweetly. He held out his water bottle to him. “Drink some more water.”

He accepted it knowing that Gunwook wouldn’t accept his refusal. As he sipped it, he stared back at Gunwook who was fondly smiling at him.

“I’m okay,” he said after a moment before holding the bottle back out to him. “This is just a lot. I need to start working out.”

Matthew clicked his tongue at that, turning towards Gunwook. “I’ve been trying to get him to be my gym buddy for over a year now,” he grumbled. He gave Taerae the side eye. “He doesn’t listen to me.”

“I’m not going to the gym. Too much sweat there,” Taerae grimaced. He stuck out his tongue in disgust at the thought. “I’ll be your at-home workout buddy.”

Matthew pressed his lips together and shook his head. Meanwhile Gunwook looked back and forth between them with shining eyes and a smile stretched across his face. He was enjoying every moment of their bickering.

“I used to have a gym membership, but I can’t afford it anymore,” said Gunwook. He reached out for Taerae who took his hand without a beat of hesitancy. They all began walking up the path again. “I use my weight set and treadmill at home now.”

Taerae peered down at their hands, watching as their fingers intertwined. Though their hands were a bit clammy, Gunwook didn’t seem to mind and neither did he. He liked the way it felt to hold his hand and the way they looked together. It was different from Matthew’s smaller hand. Larger and a bit more rough, but safe. He always felt safe wrapped up in Gunwook. Even his presence alone was safe. It is just who he is.

“If we lived closer together we could be gym buddies,” Matthew said enthusiastically. “I would pay for your membership in a heartbeat.”

“And then you’d stop bothering me about it?” Taerae asked with a tiny smirk, looking past Gunwook only to see Matthew’s unfaltering excitement. In fact, Matthew didn’t spare his husband even a glance. He only continued to stare at Gunwook expectantly.

Gunwook giggled, ducking his head. “I would be your gym buddy in a heartbeat, hyung,” he said. He glanced at Taerae and squeezed his hand. “And I would invite Taerae hyung over to work out when I’d rather stay in.”

“The perfect compromise,” chuckled Matthew. He bumped his shoulder against Gunwook’s gently. “I love that. You must make a good boyfriend.”

The younger’s ears turned pink to match his cheeks, lowering his head again bashfully. “You could find out for yourself one day.”

Taerae hummed thoughtfully. A married couple with a boyfriend.

“We could,” whispered Matthew. He looked across at Taerae and chuckled softly at the dreamy expression on his face. “He’s already imagining it.”

Snapping his head towards his husband, Taerae huffed at him. “Am not,” he argued. But they all could tell that was a lie. “If I were to imagine it though, I think it would be nice. Don’t you?”

The both of them watched Taerae as they continued up the path. Their steps had slowed, in no rush to get there although the sun was beginning to set now.

“As Matthew said this morning, you could be our person too,” he continued, making eye contact with Gunwook who was staring back intensely. “And I think that would be nice… to have twice the love I dreamed of. And to give you the kind of love and acceptance you always deserved.”

An emotion that they hadn’t seen before flickered in Gunwook’s eyes. Taerae swore he could see tears starting to well up in them as well, but the younger turned his head back towards the golden sun before he could look too closely.

“I think that would be more than nice, hyung,” Gunwook whispered, squeezing Taerae’s hand. 

“Absolutely,” added Matthew, his voice louder than he meant it to be and making the both of them jump. He laughed softly. “I’m looking forward to getting to know you even more, Gunwookie. We could go on dates and video call.”

“And sleepovers,” Gunwook added with a wide smile.

Matthew wiggled his eyebrows at that. “Sleepovers, huh?”

While Gunwook smirked at him, Taerae let out a dry and humorless laugh. It was a good thing Gunwook was between them because he really wanted to (lovingly) hit him for that one.

“Yes, sleepovers. Which means sleeping,” said Taerae, clicking his tongue once again. He did that a lot when it came to Matthew and his little antics. A habit that made his husband only want to tease him more.

“Other stuff and sleeping.”

“Seok Matthew.”

Gunwook snickered at them more. “You see? This is why you two need me,” he teased. “I can be a moderator in your arguments.”

His glaring eyes softening, Taerae slowly leaned his head against Gunwook’s shoulder. “Or you can just take my side since I’m usually right.”

The three of them laughed, continuing to chat as they journeyed to the peak. When they arrived, Taerae didn’t have to question at all if their long hike was worth it. 

It was heaven on Earth.

There were no words that any of them could have spoken to describe the beauty in front of them, the vibrant oranges and pinks that blended together in the sky and the rolling emerald hills below. It was as if God Himself picked up a brush that evening and painted the view.

There were also no words that could have captured the warmth in Taerae’s chest that was likely in theirs as well. It was as if God Himself brought the three of them together. Something this perfect could have no other explanation.

♡

Gunwook had left his jacket on purpose.

He randomly confessed to it late that night when they were all sitting on the beach. Those few days earlier when he had abandoned it in their hotel room, leaving it hanging on the back of the chair, it was no accident. He left it there with the intention of using it as an excuse to see them again—not knowing that they would beat him to it.

Taerae had laughed the hardest, explaining that he had used a similar tactic when he proposed to Matthew. He recalled that day, how he pretended to forget his jacket inside the restaurant so Matthew would go get it for him. All the while, Taerae used that time to walk to the exact spot on the sidewalk where Matthew had asked him to hang out exactly a year earlier.

While Taerae used a jacket as a distraction, Gunwook used his as a small excuse. A quiet hope. A gentle nudge.

The next morning, after their affectionate goodbyes in the hallway outside Gunwook’s hotel room, he suddenly dug through his bag and pulled the racer jacket out. He held it out, to no one in particular, and smiled softly.

“Keep it,” he had whispered. “It looks better on the both of you anyways.”

Although it didn’t exactly match Matthew's sweatpants, he wore the jacket with them the following day when they also left Jeju Island. As they sat on the plane, Taerae rested his head against his husband’s shoulder. His cheek was pressed against the smooth material of it and it smelled like Gunwook’s perfume. He thinks he may have sprayed some directly on it before giving it to them.

When they got home that afternoon, Matthew hung the jacket on one of the hooks next to the door. Taerae watched as his lover ran his fingers across the material. The action was familiar. He had done it too. 

“Is it crazy that I miss him already?” said Matthew, turning to him with outstretched arms.

Taerae wrapped his husband in his arms, and somehow he felt smaller. “I do too. Maybe we can video chat with him later?” A breathy little chuckle tickled his neck. “What? Do you think we’ll come off too clingy if we ask?”

“Maybe. I don’t know. Maybe we should wait a day.”

Taerae almost pouted at his response. “If you say so. Should we unpack our things now?”

Judging by the way Matthew’s arms tightened around his waist and he smashed his face into his neck, he could tell the answer was a hard ‘no.’ 

“Or a nap.”

“Please,” Matthew mumbled against his skin.

He peeled his arms off of him before guiding him towards their bedroom by his hand. “Come on, you big baby.”

It turned out that Taerae was more tired than he had thought. Within ten minutes of stroking the back of Matthew’s head to soothe him to sleep, he was also softly snoring into his pillow. Being back in the comfort of their bed coaxed him right to sleep.

They slept until the sun disappeared. Their bags were still fully packed on the living room floor and Taerae’s phone was buzzing.

In a half-asleep panic, he rolled over and began patting around on the bed in an attempt to find it. Matthew, much less frantic, turned on the bedside lamp.

“Here, jagiya,” Matthew said with a gravely voice. He reached over Taerae and picked up the phone that lay face down in the blankets. He flipped it over and smiled. Taerae knew that smile.

“Gunwook?”

“He wants to FaceTime.”

Taerae sat up, brushing his fingers through his hair to quickly try and fix it. “And you said we should wait until tomorrow,” he teased. “Answer it.”

Laying on his back, Matthew tapped the screen. “Hey you,” he answered the call. The corners of his lips stretched wider. “Taerae is busy. Just you and me, baby.”

“O-Oh?” Gunwook stuttered on the other side. “Baby?”

Taerae almost reached over to hit him, but kind of wanted to see where this went. Carefully he laid down next to him, out of view of the camera, but close enough to see Gunwook’s sweet face. He was at his kitchen counter, phone propped up against something so that both of his hands were free while he prepared food. Stirring something in a small pot, he stared at his screen with round eyes.

“Do you like that petname?” giggled Matthew. He moved his arm to rest it behind his head. 

The younger’s eyes went even bigger. Taerae understood why. He was also practically drooling at the sight of Matthew’s bicep and his H.M.C tattoo—Howl’s Moving Castle, his mom’s favorite anime. He didn’t have to do a thing for Taerae to think he looked hot. It came naturally to him. Sometimes Taerae was envious of that, his effortless ability to look that fine. Even after just waking up.

“Do I?” Gunwook asked, biting his lip and shyly looking down at the pot of food. “I liked it a little too much, hyung. You’re making me blush.”

Matthew giggled more. “You’re our baby now, Gunwookie. It’s fitting.”

“I don’t know why I feel more nervous now that we’re talking over the phone,” admitted Gunwook. He moved the spoon off to the side before reaching to adjust the temperature on the stove. “I feel like a kid with a crush again.”

Looking between them, Taerae fondly smiled. They both looked like kids. It seemed to be a common occurrence when they got together. They brought out the kid in each other.

“Where is your husband though? You have his phone, but no Taerae.”

Matthew glanced to the side towards Taere who fluttered his eyelashes and smiled his dimpled smile. “He’s in the bathroom,” he replied. He turned back to the camera, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. “Explosive diarrhea."

“You asshole,” Taerae laughed. This time he really did hit him—right on his stupidly hot bicep. “Why are you like this?”

“Hyung!” Gunwook exclaimed, leaning closer to his phone. His eyes were bright and twinkling at the mere sound of Taerae’s voice.

Resting the back of his head against Matthew’s stupid bicep now, Taerae came into view of the camera. “Hi, Wookie,” he said sweetly. “What are you making?”

His cheeks went pink as he stared at Taerae. “Doenjang jjigae,” Gunwook answered softly. He brushed his hair back out of his face, glancing down at the pot “I should make it for hyungs soon. You’d really like it.”

Taerae could tell he was nervous like he said he was, and it was absolutely adorable. He would reach through the screen and kiss his squishy pink cheeks if he could.

“You look really good, Taerae hyung,” he added suddenly. He picked up the spoon again, ever so casually going back to preparing his stew.

“All of a sudden?” Taerae snickered. His face was hot. Now he was the shy one. “My eyes are all puffy from napping and you think I look good?”

“You always do.”

“I wouldn’t say that. You’ve only known me for, like, a week. You haven’t seen the worst of me yet.”

Saying that out loud felt wild. Only about a week had passed and he was this down bad. It wouldn’t be the first time he had felt like this though. It feels impossible for him to take it slow when it comes to romance.

He got lucky enough to fall for two guys who were the same.

“I can’t wait to see then. I’m sure you’ll still be beautiful to me,” Gunwook said after a few moments.

Taerae’s heart fluttered. Before he could think of a cute response, Matthew was giggling next to him. He was awfully giggly tonight.

“Now why is that funny to you?” Taerae asked, turning his head to look at him. “You don’t think I’m beautiful all the time?”

“Always, my honey,” Matthew smiled, leaning over to press a kiss to his forehead. He turned back to the phone. “Are you going to invite us over soon so you can make us your doenjang jjigae?”

Gunwook’s eyes were round again. “Of course!” he said excitedly. “I could put it in thermoses and we could go on a picnic. I kind of already planned it on my way back home.”

“Sounds like a date,” smiled Taerae.

“A date.”

The younger one was smiling so big that it almost looked like it hurt. Taerae turned into Matthew, resting his head against his chest now but still looking at the screen. A different kind of expression filled Gunwook’s eyes. Not sad, but wistful. Like he wanted to do the same, snuggle up to Matthew and hold him tight. 

And his lover must have noticed it too.

“Are you free on Saturday?”

Gunwook raised his eyebrows at the words. “Saturday? Like this Saturday?”

“Yes. Six days from now Saturday,” chuckled Matthew. “We could drive to you and you can take us on your picnic date.”

As Gunwook grabbed his phone and his clumsy thumbs moved on the screen, Taerae beamed at Matthew. He was beyond giddy. And also wide awake now. 

“I have a meeting in the morning, but I’m free after that,” he said after a moment. “A date. Our first.”

“Second actually,” corrected Taerae.

“Right, right.”

And the second date was better than the first.

They picked up Gunwook at his apartment building. He met them outside, holding a small cooler that had their food inside. He had on an outfit that made him look so sweet and soft—gray chinos, a cardigan, and New Balance sneakers that Taerae immediately told him he also owned and that they needed to match next time. 

Gunwook wrapped them both in big bear hugs and said that he missed them. Taerae breathed in his perfume. It was the same as the one on his racer jacket. He wanted to bathe in the scent.

He directed them to a local park. It was a spacious area with grassy flat land. There were sculptures, archways, and concrete paths leading through them. A small fountain was in the center of it all. It was the perfect place for a picnic and the weather was perfect for it too.

“It’s a lot busier than I thought it would be,” Gunwook said softly as they walked to find a place to spread their blanket on the ground. “A lot of people.”

“Don’t worry about it, Gunwookie,” Matthew assured him. 

He reached over and gently squeezed his hand. That was enough to relax Gunwook.

The picnic food was also perfectly prepared by Gunwook. He sliced up some fresh fruits and vegetables, made tiny sandwiches and, as he promised, doenjang jjigae in three little thermoses. It was especially precious to imagine him putting so much time into each thing. Evenly cutting the food and preparing the stew before also evenly splitting it between their three thermoses.

When Taerae knew no one at the park was nearby and looking their way, he leaned over and kissed Gunwook’s cheek as a thank you. Watching his cheeks go pink was much more satisfying in person.

Throughout the date, they subtly held hands with Gunwook and with each other. They fed each other the food and also attempted to catch tossed grapes in their mouths. Taerae giggled every time the grapes bounced off their faces and onto the blanket. Now he felt like a kid too, and that also was perfect.

They talked about their weeks which trailed off into other topics and conversations that didn’t relate at all. Matthew made Gunwook laugh, and Taerae thought his laugh was like music to his ears.

Don’t let that one go, echoed in his ears. He’s a good one.

He sure didn’t plan to. Taerae wanted this all the time.

A week and a half later, they drove the two hours to Gunwook’s apartment for date number three . They prepared a meal together in his kitchen which became more of a mess than they could have imagined. They burnt their homemade pizza and Gunwook broke the news to them with flour on his cheek and nose. Instead of being upset, Matthew only chuckled and grabbed a rag to wipe the flour from his face. Taerae looked at the burnt catastrophe in front of them and took it upon himself to order a pizza online instead.

The kitchen was all cleaned up by the time the pizza arrived. They collapsed on the couch together and ate the non-burnt pizza, chatting softly between bites. Matthew admitted that he was struggling with his job recently, something that even Taerae wasn’t really aware of. 

They listened to his rant and when he was done talking, and eating, Gunwook took his plate from him and put it to the side. He pulled Matthew into him and the older rested his head on his shoulder. He immediately relaxed into him and soon fell asleep there. Taerae let him sleep until they eventually had to leave and venture back home. Until then, Taerae stroked the back of Matthew’s head like he always did and whispered to Gunwook.

By date six, nearly a month after that, Taerae felt they were becoming something more and voiced it aloud to them. 

Gunwook had surprised them one Friday afternoon by visiting them. While the sun was still up, they went on a walk on a beautiful hiking trail not far from their house. They came up to a peak which overlooked their city and decided to rest there. It wasn’t as magical as the peak on Jeju Island, but it still felt as nice being with them. It was as they sat there when the thoughts had gathered so much in Taerae’s head that he had no choice but to let them spill out of his mouth.

“This is starting to feel real, isn’t it? More serious between us,” he broke the silence. He looked at the two of them. They were sitting next to him right there on the dirt. Matthew had his hand resting on Gunwook’s thigh and the simple intimacy of it made Taerae smile. “Do we put a label on it?”

Both of them looked at him, but with slightly different emotion in their wide eyes. While Matthew’s anticipatory expression mirrored his, Gunwook’s was dancing on the line separating excitement and hesitancy. Gunwook looked down to avoid eye contact all together. His large hand enveloped the one Matthew rested on his leg and he held it gently.

It seemed that Matthew could sense the tension as well. “What do you think, Gunwookie?” he asked in a careful tone.

“I guess I just… I have some worries,” the younger replied after a moment. 

“Worries?” Taerae said, eyebrows sewn together. He stood up and moved to sit on the other side of Gunwook. “You can talk to us about them. You know we’ll listen.”

Gunwook glanced between them and his shoulders relaxed a little. “My main worry is how people will react. I want this to be official, of course. But making it official also means telling people,” he explained. He kept his eyes on his and Matthew’s fingers. His thumb traced the older’s knuckles and stroked the length of his fingers. The action was soothing to him. “The only person in my life who knows about us is Yeojun. He accepts us, but the thought of telling his family… It’s a little scary.”

And by Yeojun’s family, he also means his own family—the family who took him in when he had no one else. Taerae wrapped his arm around Gunwook and squeezed his shoulder. He watched his face attentively, the gears turning in his head. There was more that needed to be said. So Taerae gave him the time to sort his thoughts.

“I’m also afraid of being too much. Or not enough,” he admitted with a sigh. He lifted his eyes to meet Taerae’s. They were glistening, though he wasn’t quite crying. Maybe on the verge. “I am already so attached to hyungs, but I don’t want to be too clingy or needy. But I also don’t want to give too little or give one of you more attention than the other. I don’t want to hurt anyone.”

They both listened to his concerns, nodding their heads and softly humming in understanding. Because they did understand. They could relate to every word.

“This is new for us too, baby,” whispered Matthew. He squeezed his hand as Gunwook turned his head towards him now. “We don’t know how to navigate a relationship with two people either. I know it probably feels different for you because we’ve been together for a couple years and now we’re bringing you into this. But it’s all new for all of us. We’re all figuring it out as we go.”

Taerae nodded quickly. “I have the same thoughts you have. I never want any of us to feel left out. And thankfully, so far, I think we’ve done a really good job at making sure that doesn’t happen,” he said. He smiled fondly as Gunwook looked down at his lap all shy. Taerae leaned closer, pressing his nose into his cheek. “You especially, Gunwook-ah. You take such good care of us.”

“You’re just right,” added Matthew, giggling as he watched Taerae press kisses to the younger’s cheek. “Our baby.”

Taerae pulled away and moved his hand to rub Gunwook’s back. “And as far as your family,” he said, “that’s a really valid worry. I know we’re also both worried about that, but I especially understand why you are… after everything you’ve been through.”

When Gunwook lifted his head again, his eyes were glistening with actual tears this time. “I don’t want to be abandoned again.”

At the sight of his wobbling bottom lip, Taerae’s heart sank to his feet. One thing he had quickly realized about Gunwook, and realized entirely now after a month and a half, is that Gunwook didn’t feel anything partially—he felt everything deeply and wholly. 

He was sensitive, however, in a way that didn’t make him seem weak. It takes strength to be vulnerable with others. Taerae knows because there have been countless times in his life when he chose silence over being open. It was easier.

Gunwook didn’t choose easy. He chose courage. Honesty. To show them the parts of himself that he usually hid, but trusted them enough to hold. He knew they’d be careful with every part of him, every delicate piece.

He let go of Matthew’s hand to wipe at his face. “I didn’t mean to cry,” he mumbled.

“You can cry if you need to,” Matthew whispered. His hand found its place on Gunwook’s leg again, his thumb stroking his thigh comfortingly. “No matter what happens, we’ll be here.”

“We’ll figure it out as we go,” Taerae repeated Matthew’s words.

“As boyfriends?” Gunwook asked in a small voice. A silly little smile appeared on his face. “Or well, husbands and boyfriend.”

Taerae couldn’t help but lean forward and kiss his cheek again. It was wet with tears this time and he didn’t mind. He’d kiss his tears away every day. Anything for him.

“Partners?” whispered Matthew. He smiled as the younger one leaned into him. He ran his fingers through his hair. “I think I like how that sounds.”

Gazing past him, Taerae made eye contact with his Matthew. They had a discussion about this just a few nights before, about making it official with Gunwook. They had the conversation over pancakes. The only way to have it. By the end of the conversation, and their plates were empty, they reached a unanimous decision.

Taerae smiled wide, truly unable to contain his happiness. “And you aren’t our third, Gunwook-ah. You’re not an extra or an addition. We’re equal. A triad. I found that term after doing some research,” he said proudly. 

“You’re cute, hyung,” Gunwook giggled. “Okay. A triad. I like that.”

Their following dates as an official triad felt even more intimate than the previous. Gunwook kissed like he didn’t need permission anymore. He never needed permission, but now he acted like it. They were getting to know Gunwook better too through the dates, late night video calls, and text message threads on busy work days. 

How Gunwook preferred his coffee. What kisses made him blush. The songs that made him happiest—or brought tears to his eyes.

It was date ten. They found a vintage vinyl shop in a small city in the distance between theirs and Gunwook’s. There were stations set up with record players and headphones. Enthusiastically, Gunwook had come up with the idea of each of them choosing records that they thought the other two would enjoy and then listening to them.

Matthew had picked two records that reminded him of his partners. When he held out the one for Gunwook, he stared at it as if he was an alien looking at a foreign object. It was clear that he had never heard of it before.

However, moments later when Gunwook had the headphones on and the angelic voice of Karen Carpenter came through them, the confusion was replaced by endearment. Absolute adoration for the man who had handed him the record.

Why do stars fall down from the sky

Every time you walk by?

Just like me, they long to be

Close to you.

He wasn’t completely sure what the words meant, only catching a few here and there that he knew in English, but he could feel the meaning behind the song. It tugged right at his heart strings—and his tear ducts. Taerae didn’t love seeing him cry, but it was a relief that they were happy tears this time.

Three months in, they lost count of what date they were on. In fact, they were starting to feel less like dates and more like routine. It wasn’t like a work routine that ran them dry and tired to the bone. It was an easy routine that came naturally. A routine they didn’t mind. One they needed.

Gunwook entered their house like he lived there, balancing a big brown paper bag in one arm and an overnight bag slung over his other. It was his first time staying the night. Upon being asked by Taerae in their group chat, he agreed instantly with heart eye emojis and a corny low-quality GIF of a child jumping up and down. Taerae could only shake his head at his dorky boyfriend.

“Did you rob the convenience store?” Matthew laughed, taking the large paper bag full of snacks from his arms. “When you said you were getting snacks I thought you meant for movie night, not a whole week’s worth.”

“Shut up,” whined Gunwook. He reached out and batted at Matthew’s back as he turned to take them to the kitchen. “I wanted to cover all the bases. Sweet. Salty. Sour. Everything is in there.”

Taerae closed and locked the door behind Gunwook before approaching him to take his small duffel bag. He leaned up with his lips puckered. In return, he received a warm smile and a long kiss. His hand trailed around Taerae’s waist to his lower back and he pulled him in closer.

It was in moments like these when Taerae wanted to climb this man like a tree.

“It’s awfully quiet in there,” Matthew called out suddenly.

Taerae sighed and pulled away. “You ruined the moment. We were about to make out,” he huffed.

But as it turns out, their movie that night would be abandoned and they would choose kissing over watching it anyways.

After not seeing Gunwook for nearly a week because of work and life in general, they insisted he sit in the middle on the couch. On either side of him, they casually leaned over to kiss him throughout the beginning scenes. He happily leaned into every one, and before he knew it, a few pecks turned into a more passionate moment of intimacy.

Like the moment years ago with Matthew, Taerae didn’t see it coming. It wasn’t planned, but he felt ready. He wanted this.

And as he kissed along Gunwook’s neck, he could tell he wanted this too.

“Hyungs,” whined Gunwook, reaching his hand to grip Taerae’s thigh. “You’re going to kill me.”

The ending of his words was muffled by Matthew’s lips connecting to his again. Their lips moved hungrily and Matthew tilted Gunwook’s jaw to deepen the kiss. Taerae's breath caught at the sound of their mouths moving together. The heat in his gut was building as well as the weight between his legs.

He wrapped his arms around Gunwook’s neck and moved in closer. His eyes landed on a pretty mole on his neck. It received a sweet kiss. The tiny one on his jaw did as well. And soon the one he discovered on his shoulder when his oversized t-shirt slipped off of it. He wanted to kiss every part of Gunwook, worship every bit of him. His fascinations aren’t much different from Matthew’s, it seemed.

Gunwook’s hand reached blindly again. He grabbed onto the back of Taerae’s shirt and pulled him into him until they were pressed together. A soft moan left Taerae’s lips, the said weight between his legs now rubbing against Gunwook.

Separating from the younger, Matthew looked at Taerae with a small knowing smile. “Rae,” he whispered. He reached out and cupped the side of his face so he would look at him. “Come here.”

Taerae didn’t hesitate. He was done hesitating and taking it slow. He was all in. 

He stretched across Gunwook to meet Matthew in their familiar kiss. His hands found his hair like his husband loved and Matthew’s wandered under Taerae’s shirt to gently touch his waist. They knew each other well. This was familiar. Two years familiar.

But Gunwook’s shaky hand against his back was new, and the feeling of his lips against his shoulder. He knew how Gunwook liked his coffee, what kisses made him blush, and the music that stirred up the most emotion in him. This, however, was new territory. Taerae wanted to explore it immediately.

“I’m ready,” he mumbled against Matthew’s lips. He opened his eyes and shifted them to Gunwook who was watching them with fire in his eyes. A burning desire. “If you want this too, I’m ready.”

There were no words needed for the moment. Gunwook kissed with fervor, holding Taerae against him again. Intentionally, he moved his leg just right against Taerae’s hardening length in his sweatpants.

“Gunwook,” he softly moaned. He couldn’t help the way he rolled his hips against his leg in response. It was an instinctual response to the pleasure. 

“Okay,” Gunwook spoke breathlessly. His head fell back against the couch. “Can we move this somewhere else?”

Taerae noticed the way Gunwook’s hands shook. It was clear by the boldness of his actions and words that it wasn’t out of nerves, but because of the overwhelming arousement and anticipation. 

He took one of Gunwook’s hands and kissed his fingers while holding eye contact with him. “Let’s go to our bed,” whispered Taerae. His other hand reached for Matthew’s and he did it again, his lips pressing to his fingers with the same affection.

His hands didn’t let them go as they travelled down the hall to the room and he kept them close as they settled into the bed. They took it slow, hands wandering each other’s bodies and stripping off their clothes without hurry. Though the moment had begun with an urgency, it went without saying that they wanted this to last as long as it could.

“How far do you want to take this?” Matthew gently asked Gunwook who hovered over him. 

Taerae watched as Gunwook’s large hand ran down his husband’s chest. Over the grooves of his chest and toned stomach. With every touch, Matthew’s body reacted, twitching and shivering.

“I want to go as far as you both let me. I want anything.” Gunwook let out a shaky breath, his hand now reaching out for Taerae as well to pull him in for another kiss. “I’ve wanted this ever since that night. The night at the pool. I wanted to touch you. To have you. I never thought I’d be able to.”

Biting his lip, Taerae felt like he was about to burst at the seams. “Have me,” he breathed. He kissed him again with the same urgency and desperation from before.

“Jagiya,” whispered Matthew, and they both knew who he was talking to. 

Taerae turned his head to look at him and his eyes softened. They smiled at each other as if they were communicating without words. Gunwook could see it too and he giggled softly.

“I can’t wait until I can telepathically talk to you both also,” he joked. “What are you saying?”

“That you should fuck Taerae.”

Gunwook stopped giggling immediately, eyes round and mouth gaping open at the blatantness of Matthew’s words. “Oh.” He glanced between them. “I want that. Yeah.”

Smiling fondly at the younger’s shock, Taerae leaned over and kissed Gunwook’s cheek. “I want both of you to.” His hand stroked Gunwook’s arm. “Please.”

That is how he soon ended up on his back in the bed, Gunwook’s fingers working into him. His body writhed with an intense gratification. Matthew kissed along his neck and whispered about how good he was doing. Gunwook kissed his thighs when his fingers curled at just the right spot. It was as if he already knew his body well. Taerae felt like he could come undone from this alone.

He clutched onto both of them eagerly. “Please,” he whined. His hips involuntarily moved against his fingers as they filled him. He was still so tight, but he wanted him desperately. “I want it now.”

Gunwook’s eyes dilated at the sight of Taerae grinding his hips down on him and the feeling of him around his fingers. He looked to Matthew who looked just as turned on. 

“How do you want it?” Matthew asked softly, looking to Taerae for direction.

Reaching down, he pushed Gunwook’s hand so that he slowly removed his fingers from him. Taerae moved so that he lay on his side and faced Matthew. For a moment Gunwook stared in confusion, but quickly understood the vision as Taerae pulled Matthew down to lay facing him.

Gunwook eagerly lay down behind Taerae and let out a quiet moan as Taerae pushed back against his cock. “Gosh, you’re insane,” Gunwook whispered. 

“I’ve been telling you,” Matthew said, earning him a half-hearted swat on the arm from Taerae.

Gunwook wrapped his arms around Taerae at the same time as Matthew, their arms clumsily running into each other. They both chuckled, meeting over Taerae for a short kiss. Matthew gently held his face in his hand for a moment, staring into his eyes. 

It was the small moment of stillness he needed to slow him down again. Though he wanted this so desperately, and Taerae wanted it even more so, slowing down and enjoying the moment made this even more special.

So for a moment he did. He moved into Taerae slowly as he spooned him there in the bed. He kissed his neck slowly and reached out to touch Matthew’s shoulder with the same unhurriedness. He moved with the slowness that Matthew so often enjoyed, but soon enough met Taerae with the fervent desire for release that the older craved as he needily whined for more. Holding onto Taerae tightly, he thrusted into him. His hyung felt so warm and tight around him that he could hardly control himself anymore. 

Taerae shook with pleasure as Gunwook’s cock filled him. He reached down and wrapped his hand around Matthew, pumping him to the rhythm of Gunwook’s movements. 

It was all so overwhelming. The sound of Matthew’s moans. Gunwook’s heavy breaths against his neck. The slight change in position as Gunwook lifted one of Taerae’s legs and moved into him faster. The position he chose for them felt intimate, Matthew on one side of him and Gunwook on the other. Surrounded by them.

He reached back, his fingers tugging at Gunwook’s hair and angling his head to bring him in for a sloppy kiss.

“You’re so good, Gunwook. Feels so good,” Taerae whimpered, at the complete mercy of Gunwook. A lazy smile spread across his face at the feeling of Gunwook’s stuttering hips. “Come for me, Wookie. Come inside.”

“Hyung,” Gunwook moaned as he pistoned into him.

“Yes. Just like that,” whined Taerae.

Taerae’s back arched at the feeling, gripping onto Gunwook’s hair tighter while his other hand let go of Matthew’s length completely. His eyes rolled back as he could feel Gunwook fill the condom while inside of him. Meanwhile, Matthew could only watch in adoration as Gunwook climaxed. He reached over and stroked the side of his face with his thumb.

For a moment, Gunwook was worried that he had climaxed too soon and disappointed his hyung. But Taerae instead praised him—and clearly, he wasn’t done having his fun.

“Good boy,” Taerae whispered, wasting no time before slowly moving Gunwook’s cock out of him and then pushing Matthew onto his back. He straddled his hips and sat up before reaching for the lube on the bedside table. “Your turn?”

“You’re enjoying this too much,” Matthew chuckled before biting his lip at the feeling of Taerae’s hand around his cock.

“I think I’m enjoying it just as much,” breathed Gunwook next to them. He watched them where he lay on his back, eyes wide at the view of Taerae on top of the other. “I feel like I’m seeing a completely new side of Taerae hyung.”

Taerae smirked down at Gunwook all while sinking down onto Matthew’s cock. “You like what you see?” he asked with a shudder.

Gunwook could get hard again from watching this. This man was dangerous.

He was in awe of him as he soon wildly bounced on top of Matthew, his hips moving recklessly. His head was thrown back, hair sticking to his slightly sweaty forehead. Also in this desperate state, Taerae was absolutely breath-taking. Gunwook was convinced there was nothing more gorgeous.

That was until Matthew, a moaning mess underneath him, reached out to Gunwook with hungry eyes. Quickly, Gunwook scooted closer and positioned himself above the beautiful man. He kissed him deeply, Matthew’s moans filling the cavity of his mouth every few seconds. It was clumsy and incredibly sexy.

Gunwook began to kiss along Matthew’s neck and along his shoulder all while his hand roamed his chest and stomach again. His skin was soft and all his to touch. 

He glanced at Taerae who was slowing down on top of Matthew, and without words, Matthew bent his knees and began thrusting into him at a faster pace than before.

“Oh, my god. Yes, Matthew,” Taerae moaned, voice cracking. He leaned forward, bracing a hand on Matthew’s chest as his other grasped Gunwook’s arm. “Oh— Oh, fuck. You—”

Gunwook had to bite his lip to hold back a groan at the sight of Taerae, whimpering and gasping as his body tremored with pleasure above them. Matthew’s thrusts only gained momentum, driving into him sharply and at just the right angle to drive him crazy. 

For the second time that evening, Gunwook was hard. 

It didn’t go unnoticed. Matthew reached over, wrapping his hand around his length. His small hand was soft too, moving smoothly and with the perfect amount of pressure. A whimper fell from Gunwook’s lips. How Matthew managed to touch him like that and pound into Taerae simultaneously was truly a wonder.

“Look what you’re doing to him. To us,” Gunwook whispered to Matthew. He reached out to rub one of Taerae’s shaking thighs. He rolled his hips into Matthew’s hand and let out a quivering breath. “You’re fucking us so good, hyung.”

His words were a domino effect. Moaning loudly, Matthew harshly bucked his hips up into Taerae. On top of him, Taerae wailed in reaction to the force, gripping onto both of them tighter.

Taerae looked completely gone now, eyes glossy and lips parted. As if he had lost control completely, whimpers and moans came out with every movement Matthew made. Gunwook trailed his hand to Taerae’s face and pulled him down to pepper his face in kisses. The older one melted into his affection.

“Close,” Taerae whimpered. It was all he could manage to get out, his head falling forward as Matthew’s hips relentlessly moved. The sounds of their skin meeting filled the room along with their moans and heavy breaths. “Don’t stop.”

He released on Matthew’s stomach with a choked sob. His arms slid around both of their necks and anchored to them, their foreheads pressed together. Gunwook followed in suit, spilling out onto Matthew’s hand. Matthew, however, was close but still hadn’t reached his climax. Though it was becoming quickly overstimulating for Taerae, he let his lover continue to pump into him. Frankly, Gunwook was impressed by their stamina. 

It came from years of practice, he assumed. He was ready for lots of practice with them too.

Trembling violently, Taerae still managed to smile as Gunwook pressed another kiss to his temple and then one to Matthew’s face. The younger’s eyes were shining as he watched the both of them. Taerae would have found it more endearing if he didn’t feel like he was about to pass out.

But soon enough, Matthew reached his climax, much to his relief and Taerae’s.

Once they were all cleaned up and laying in the bed, Gunwook lay between them again. Taerae laid on his side, elbow propping his upper body up and his chin resting in his hand. He looked at the both of them with a tiny smile.

“You look so sweet now… as if you weren’t just a sex-crazed animal ten minutes ago,” joked Matthew, moving to rest his head against Gunwook’s chest. “What are you thinking about?”

“Both of you,” Taerae answered immediately. “How lucky I am.”

Gunwook’s eyes softened. He reached up to stroke his cheek, still in awe of him now. Always in awe of him.

“When I met Matthew, I felt like I had met the person I was waiting for my whole life,” Taerae softly continued. He leaned into Gunwook’s touch. “And with you… I didn’t know I was waiting for you until I found you. It feels the same way though. Like you complete me. Complete us.”

Nodding against Gunwook’s chest, Matthew agreed. He stretched his arm across Gunwook’s stomach to grab Taerae’s hand and squeezed it. 

Gunwook dropped his hand from Taerae’s face to join it with theirs. His thumb rubbed Matthew’s hand which was settled on top of Taerae’s. All connected.

“I was once convinced that I didn’t deserve a love that felt this perfect,” whispered Gunwook after a moment. “I still don’t think I do deserve it, but I accept it… because I don’t think I could ever live without this now.”

Almost in complete sync, Matthew and Taerae leaned forward and pressed a kiss to Gunwook’s face. All three of them giggled, Matthew settling back into his chest and Taerae resting his head against Gunwook’s shoulder. Their arms all wrapped around each other, there in a pile in the mess of sheets and blankets. All connected. All so in love.

Gunwook closed his eyes with a blissful smile on his face. “How did I get so lucky?” he whispered.

Matthew smirked. “Because you left your jacket in our hotel room.”

While Gunwook giggled more, Taerae swatted him once again on his arm in true Taerae fashion. But he was wondering the same. Matthew was as well.

How did I get so lucky?