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you sing the words, but don’t know what it means

Summary:

Ava is caught up in a mission gone wrong and has to face her fears with the help of her team

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Ava could feel herself tensing up as she watched Bucky prep a syringe. The sight of needles sent her back to being a small frightened child surrounded by lots of doctors and nurses who saw her as nothing more than a lab rat, an outlet for their twisted experiments. She noticed her hands phasing and a wave of panic hit. Luckily, Yelena was there and she held her hands, giving a gentle squeeze in comfort as she crouched in front of where Ava was sitting. She encouraged Ava to take some deep breaths, giving a small but warm smile as her heart rate finally began to stabilise. They had been worried, the mission had gone south and when they found Ava she was tied down to a gurney in a makeshift lab with some form of inhibitor stuck in her neck that had her out cold. It luckily hadn’t taken too long for the guards to be dispatched of and she was rushed to the medical wing on returning to the tower. They didn’t have constant medical staff, Bucky was able to get access to a doctor when they needed it but they were pretty sufficient at treating wounds and injuries so mostly patched up themselves or someone else on the team would help them. Luckily they also a lab with plenty of antidotes for all manner of poisons so Bucky had quickly managed to grab the right one whilst Yelena focused on calming a rather agitated Ava. Out of them all, Ava struggled the most with medical situations due to her past experiences and traumas. It was difficult getting the girl to take care of herself, she would avoid the medical wing as much as possible, but she didn’t really have a choice today she knew. It was important that she not only got this antidote but that they could check it hadn’t affected her any other ways. She let out a tiny whimper when Bucky approached with the shot, Yelena was still holding her hands and the blonde kept reassuring her that it would all be just fine and over soon.
“I’m sorry” Bucky said with a look of genuine concern on his face. Ava tried to nod, her body tense and in pain but she hoped he knew she didn’t blame him for this at all. He gently wiped an area at the top of her arm with antiseptic as her fear only intensified. She cowered away in fear when he finally approached with the syringe in hand.
“Ava..” his voice was soft and warm as Yelena moved to gently rub her back, hoping to ease her muscles. Ava felt like a little kid again as she looked apologetically up at Bucky. The two seemed to share a look but whilst Ava was trying to work it out, suddenly she was being lifted into someone’s arms. John was now sat on the medical table with Ava in his lap, his arms firm but comforting on her waist. He gave a nod to Bucky, applying a slight extra pressure to Ava’s arm as she squirmed away in protest to keep her steady as the needle slid in. She could’ve just let herself phase out to avoid him but they were just trying to help, deep down she knew it was needed too. Her breathing was ragged and her heart racing once again but John kept hold of her, applying pressure in just the right way to ground her. Bucky just seemed relieved and thankful it was over, whilst Yelena took up position holding her hands again. “Well done” she whispered, rubbing her thumb across Ava’s knuckles in a soothing motion as the antidote got to work. Ava just looked exhausted but Bucky knew they needed to check her vitals and get some form of nutrition into her before she could sleep. Checking the vitals of a traumatised woman who could disappear at will was no easy feat but lucky for him and for Ava, it was much easier thanks to the help of their little team. John and Yelena were happy to help in continuing to keep her calm, which really helped a lot. John continued to gently but effectively use deep pressure to calm her frayed nerves. Yelena was chief distractor to keep Ava’s mind away from the medical procedures and from her traumas. Between them, they kept her calm enough for him to place the heart monitor leads. The sound of a thankfully steady heartbeat filled the room though it picked up pace slightly whilst Bucky took her blood pressure. Luckily that seemed to go off without a hitch, he could quickly check her eyes and ears before he got the stethoscope to listen to her breathing. John carefully moved Ava in his arms so that Bucky was able to put the stethoscope on her chest. Then he could unplug the monitor, to which Ava let out a sigh of relief. “All good, just get yourself some food and a good nights sleep, you’ll be fine”

Ava smiled, glad everything was ok as Yelena gently stroked her hair. John carefully stood up with Ava still in his arms, they could tell she was still exhausted because she barely had the energy to complain when John carried her back to the common room. Alexei and Bob had been there for a while by the looks of it, Bob was just sat in his usual seat by the window whilst Alexei took the couch.
“Everything good, ghost lady?” The older man asked and Ava managed to nod. John put her on the seat at the kitchen counter. She gave him a nod, despite all their differences his help had been invaluable today but she would never say it lest it made his ego grow even further. She gave a smile when Yelena took the seat next to her. The blonde ex-assassin had become her closest friend on the team, part of Ava was worried that Yelena might think less of her having seen her at such a low but it had only strengthened their bond. She wordlessly handed Ava a cup, it was unspoken but understood that she was not up to eating but the nutrition shake would at least keep her body fuelled after their slightly rocky experiences today. It made Ava feel all happy inside that she finally had a group of people to rely on.