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Maze is going to beat Ordo Skirata to death with his datapad.
He’d honestly thought the days of that particular Null making him want to commit murder were over. They’d settled things. Ordo had punched him, Maze had punched Ordo in return, and things had seemed settled. They’d come to agreement. Maze had genuinely believed he could go back to bureaucracy and reading up on all the things Kamino didn’t cover.
He underestimated Ordo’s sheer, dogged commitment to being the most irritating person in the galaxy. And the worst part? It wasn’t even intentional.
Ordo, with a great deal of sincerity, was and is hellbent on befriending him. Or possibly seducing him, Maze isn’t sure.
Every second he isn’t on the job, Ordo is in Maze’s office, trying to talk to him about every conceivable subject, bringing him gifts, attempting to persuade him to go out with him to holos or dinner. It’s gotten to the point that Maze has stopped being surprised when Ordo shows up clinging to the window and letting himself in. The man’s also lost any sense of personal space he might’ve had; he seems convinced Maze will enjoy being tackle-hugged if he just does it enough.
Maze isn’t sure if Ordo’s romantically motivated or if he’s just so socially stunted that this is all an attempt to be friendly that looks like something else. Either way, he doesn’t want it. He has enough people in his life, thank you. There’s no need for a Null ARC who makes rocks look emotionally intelligent and who can’t comprehend that Maze would enjoy seeing him a little less. There is absolutely nothing Maze can say or do that gets “Leave me alone” into his thick head. For fuck’s sake, at least when Mereel is annoying, he’s doing it on purpose! Ordo’s obliviousness just makes Maze want to throw him off the roof.
It’s funny how Ordo has completely abandoned any interest in his lady friend in favor of chasing after Maze. Despite first impressions, statuesque blondes are apparently not his thing. Maze asked about it once. Ordo’s reply had been a confused stare and a system that Agent Wrennen had returned to her normal job and her association with them had ended. Then he asked if Maze wanted to go to the gardens and get lunch.
Yeah, he can’t help but wonder.
”Hello, Captain.”
Maze gives Ordo a look of utter disgust. Someone like him should not be smiling like that. It’s like seeing 17 beam; it just doesn’t look right on his face. “Fuck off.”
Ordo claps him on the back. “You’re really funny, Maze. Really funny.”
Forget the datapad, Maze is going to use the caf machine. Beating Ordo with one of the few consistent sources of happiness in his life will send a message.
Oh, joy of fucking joys, in walks Ordo’s father, wearing his usual sandy gold armor and a strained attempt at a smile. Shockingly, Skirata and Maze have more in common now than ever before. Both find Ordo’s behavior weird and exasperating, both want him to stop, and both would be much happier if he’d go try Miss Besany Wrennen and leave Maze alone. That doesn’t mean Maze has to like him. “Ord’ika, I think Maze has work to do.”
”I can help him.”
Fuck no . Datawork is Maze’s entire personality at this point and he’ll be damned before he lets this idiot have anything to do with it. “I don’t need any help.” He doesn’t even bother telling Ordo to go away; it’ll just go in one ear, zoom through the empty place where his brain is supposed to be, and out the other.
”I’ll get you caf,” Ordo offers downright chipperly. It’s unnatural. Maze feels a shudder go through him.
”Fine, whatever.” Anything to get him away.
Once Ordo’s out of earshot, Maze looks over at Skirata. “Do you think I’ll get the point across if I throw him out the window?”
The man doesn’t even get upset over an ostensible threat to one of his precious children. That alone speaks volumes. “No.”