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Maybe I don't trust a man with no scars, was the response he'd gotten that time -- ages ago as it seemed -- when he'd made his first teasing attempts at a romance and had them shrugged off. Men of honor loved to play hard-to-get... but when they said things like that, deep, deep down they'd already been gotten, so Fai had just smirked, knowing it was a matter of time. Not being trusted by a warrior like Kuro-puu so early in their travels hadn't particularly bothered him. Fai knew perfectly well that he wasn't particularly trustworthy. As soon as an answer like that would have bothered him, he had stopped asking, Oh... why not? And every once in a while, you see, he got to glimpse a look on that face like the one he saw now -- a look that demonstrated clearly that a man of honor was still a man.
He'd been enjoying the late summer afternoon on the porch by their rooms. The scent of magnolias floated about, drifting on the warm breeze. The white blossoms covered all the trees for miles around, reminding him of home despite the comfortable heat. There was no way he could have met such fine weather in his own world, where on the warmest days the ice outside barely began to melt; but from far enough away, the blossoming trees looked like the snow-covered landscapes he'd been running from for however long the five of them had been traveling. Months, he felt, had passed, but who knew how that translated into the passage of time in Ceres. Years? Centuries? Seconds? Time was so fickle. As long as that hadn't happened, what did it matter how you counted the time? What was presently important was this: that an even more picturesque element of the scenery had just wandered the ten feet between one of the natural hot springs and the porch where Fai was sitting. His Kuro-tan was clad, like he himself, in one of the bathing robes their hosts had issued -- and delightfully little else, having come straight from the water. This one was a flame pattern, an amusing complement to the water design on the garment Fai was half-wearing. The warmth was so pleasant on his skin as he dried, it had seemed somehow criminal to bundle on clothing unnecessarily. And it was just the two of them, for now.
Letting his eyes linger on every detail, Fai's gaze trailed up the lines of the other man's robe, studying the barely concealed body underneath. That was certainly a fine example of a good-looking man: classically tall, dark, and handsome, featuring well-toned muscles on every part of his body, all of which Fai had admired often before. The first time they'd met, actually... and on many an occasion between then and now, thanks to a wonderful tendency in the Japanese man to consider key parts of his wardrobe non-essentials while lounging or partaking in manual labor. And he didn't feel the least bit like he should hide the fact that he was staring, since Kuro-tchi's red eyes were just as shamelessly engaged. He smiled his most pleased smile, watching his companion towel off his hair roughly. Those burning eyes never left him. Just imagining what sorts of fantasies were playing behind them was starting to excite his own inclinations.
Well, if he wanted sex, he had to know by now that Fai would not need much persuasion to be at his disposal.
Thoughts like the ones he saw flickering now within those red eyes had been slowly forcing his Kuro-sama to admit that he had the same needs as Fai, the same unfulfilled desires – and just maybe to admit that this was going to be more than a quick screw to let off steam. It would be that, too, of course. It had probably been at least as long for the fighter as it had been for Fai. Too damn long, anyway. He bit his lip and leaned back slightly to invite the man closer. Just a little, nothing showy. The warrior's spirit in the man he wanted had such a pronounced appreciation for economy of action; it would be counterproductive to waste the energy when he was being blatant enough already. And so help him, his breath actually caught when the man started walking slowly closer, looking for the first time like he might choose to accept.
He walked right up the steps toward where Fai was sitting, not worrying about whether Fai's legs would open to make room for him to approach. They would, and did. His dark companion had braced himself with one hand on the floor near where Fai's head now lay, the other hand having caught an outstretched arm. The skin on his fingers and the pads of his hands felt as tough as birch bark where it had been calloused by years of sword play, but the brush of his lips on the inside of Fai's wrist was like the lightning in a summer rain. His partner tasted Fai's pale, delicate skin consideringly, probably thinking that this decision hadn't already been made. But while the promises of some serious foreplay at last sent their current through his body, Fai let the fingers of his other hand play in his companion's still-damp hair. He could read so much in the energy pouring out of every inch of skin… this was happening, and in just a moment the dark-haired man was going to forget the meaning of the words 'stop' and 'hold back'.
Wouldn't that be fun…
It had been obvious for some time that Kuro-chan looked at him with lust in his eyes, but all those trust issues had been restraining him. Hmm… well, trusting-me issues… Fai had been chipping away at them, for various reasons, with promising results. But right at this moment, those crumbling reservations had vanished and seemed fully forgotten. Maybe the bath had done him some good... who knew? Every warrior, and that included this one, had to realize that a vital face of honor lay in not lying to yourself. One thing that was evident right now: even if this was a man who could bear any frustration when he thought that giving into temptation was wrong, he was by no means the type of man to deny himself what he wanted without a very good reason.
In the moment they touched, feeling that body pressing him hard against the mat floors, Fai knew exactly what this man wanted. And I'll give it to you, Fai said with a push of his leg down his companion's exquisitely toned thigh. Fresh from the baths, the skin was warm and supple, and the man was delightfully responsive. Kisses burned hot from the warrior's lips, trailing from his shoulder to the base of his neck, where his companion was currently making a mark that -- conveniently -- Sakura and Syaoran might be too young and/or innocent to recognize. Maybe, anyway. Too late now, if they proved more worldly than they seemed. He tugged at the cloth belt tied around his partner's waist, remembering that it fastened in the back with a bit of frustration as his fingers pulled at the smooth front to no avail. Whose bright idea was that, anyway, to tie all those knots so far away? The question was only of limited importance, however. Compared to the sensation of the kisses devouring his mouth, and of fingers tracing patterns on his skin, the mysteries of foreign clothing seemed rather trivial.
He could reach it… legs twined, he arched close and worked at the knot on his companion's back with his fingers. In barely a breath's time, the loosened tie was lying somewhere on the steps below and the robe itself was proving to be no impediment. That body… that sculpted, sun-bronzed body was naked and warm and pressed right up against his skin. Fai could trace the asymmetrical tan lines left by wearing his armor without a shirt and whisper sweet things to his heart's content… words like, Oh yes, left please, ah more! And how's that? All the things he'd been hoping he'd get the chance to say someday.
It was all going so well when an abrupt pause in action punctuated an exclamation. "Oh, fuck…" his fellow traveler said, pushing himself back. Fai blinked questioningly, showing valiant restraint in his own mind by not answering, Bingo! Kuro-pon was wiping the shine off his mouth with the back of his hand, the mouth whose kisses Fai could still feel on his skin, all the while staring intently with those marvelous red eyes. "Where are the kids?"
Fai laughed heartily, pleasantly lightheaded, and with a sigh stretched out his arms above his head as he watched his companion's eyes stray. "Such a good father, Kuro-rin…" The scowling look he got in reply did not say, I find your jokes amusing. The sentiment was more akin to, I would very much like to have sex with you right now, and I'm not in the mood to be interrupted. That was an entirely supportable sentiment, in Fai's thinking. He'd always been in favor of it. Just as he was in favor of the way he could pull the focus of those eyes back to his lips by showing just a hint of tongue and draw the sound of a sharp breath by slowly circling a hardened nipple with his finger. "They're off doing something unspeakably wholesome, I'm sure. Somewhere that's not here." The effort of holding back combined with frustration at Fai's style of answer translated into a bit of a growl. Just by sitting up, he was in the man's arms again, brushing noses, brushing lips, hands trailing down the well-defined lines of the small of the warrior's back… and there wasn't any need to fake the pleasure that shot through him when those strong, firm hands gripped his posterior. He'd been absolutely right about his dear, accidental comrade-in-arms… this was someone who knew how to comport himself well when engaged in adult activities. "Our host took them to meet his children," he whispered through kisses that deepened as his partner's concerns melted away. "They'll be gone until supper." That was apparently all Fai needed to say.
After a particularly violent kiss that left Fai's tongue tingling, his partner stood up and walked away in a hurry. He rested back on one hand, combing the hair back from his face with the other when the breeze blew it into his eyes, watching with no small amount satisfaction the cocky gait of a man who would without a doubt be coming back in a moment to finish what they'd started. For the nonce, he was rummaging through the few personal effects they retained and the even fewer amenities in the room's single closet. "Damn it," he heard his companion mutter, closing the door firmly. "Nothing." Well, nothing in the closet but assorted bits of bedding, from what Fai could see. Which they would not be bothering with. "Damn world-hopping…" the mutters continued. It would seem his Kuro-sama might not have much concern for romance, but absolutely believed in lubricant.
The sound of him chuckling behind his hand drew the man's eyes back towards the open porch. "Don't worry about it. I don't need anything."
With a quiet scoff and rare smile he strolled back and sat down, holding Fai's back to his chest, cradling him between his legs. "You might if it's been awhile." His collar fell backwards with little provocation, revealing Fai's shoulder and the back of his neck to the predations of surprisingly tender kisses and the occasional bite. Warmth radiated from the exposed skin, falling down his arm and torso. The hand stroking his inner thigh just where his leg met his hip was persuading Fai not to argue with any sentiments his comrade might express. He's a considerate lover, Fai reflected with one of the last coherent thoughts he anticipated having in the immediate future. Why am I not surprised? But even if it hurt a little… even if he was stiff and aching in the morning… this would be worth it. Electric heat surged through his muscles and skin as the hand taking so much of his attention fondled his stiffening erection. Fai arched into it, jaw falling open, arm reaching backwards so his fingers could tangle themselves in hair that was damp now both with bathwater and with sweat… the landscape blurred and darkened before his eyes, falling away entirely when his back hit the ground at last.
He came in his lover's hand, the rush peaking and slowly leaving his body begging for more as the sensation ebbed away. A wanton groan started in the pit of his stomach with the touch of his partner's slick fingers moving inside him; the sound tore up through his body and out his panting mouth. In the wake of orgasm, his muscles were pliant and forgiving, but it was still tight – tighter than he'd recalled. The pain was slight though noticeable, and it hurt in a way his body remembered fondly from the days when he'd first been with a man. It wouldn't be long, he knew, before the pain faded, at least, if it didn't vanish, overshadowed by the equally familiar ecstasy of a taking a good, hard man inside and making him come. He stretched out his hands down towards the dark-haired wanderer, almost out of fingertips' reach but not quite, scattered memories and images playing in his mind. In another world, at another time, with another man, his body had cried out this way. Through heavy-lidded eyes, he saw a different face from the one that he still met in dreams, and wondered for an instant what strange chance had brought him to the space of this man's arms, further from home and history than either would have imagined possible. Yet even as the embers of a kiss lingered on his lips, the ghosts of memory wakened in his skin – memories of caresses that were so like these, yet so distinctly other – reminding him that history was not as easy to leave as home. And as for chance… his memories of the Dimension Witch chuckled in his mind at the thought of chance. Fai could hear his own breathing as his hands touched those broad arms at last, wrapping his legs around Kurogane's waist and arching back until shoulders pressed hard into the floor, and the idea of this being inevitable in the course of his life was almost too absurd to be a joke.
He'd wanted not to fall in love again. He still wanted that, despite everything. Wouldn't it be simpler if they could just find casual solace in a shared bed on lonely nights? It seemed like good sense for two unlikely comrades-in-arms, tossed as they were from one world to another by inevitability's whim. They could satisfy their bodies' needs, and not get too attached, not risk getting hurt. But back when this could have been simple, Kurogane had waited for trust and understanding and respect and all the things that led to complication for a man like Fai. Now, when his companion was finally ready to take him, they'd ceased to be strangers. The part of him that wished he didn't like it this way as much as he did was little by little being edged out of his mind. Running his fingernails down the contours of chest and abdomen as his new lover came closer, he tried again to believe that he just wanted a man, and not this man. But this moment felt too good to waste worrying about things that wouldn't change. When he reached down between his legs, he could grasp the fighter's most personal weapon, flushed and full, and help to push it in. He lied and said it didn't hurt, and as he gasped heard whispers from his lover that he'd prefer the truth to lies… Fai said to just keep going, because he knew more than anything that he didn't want to stop now. It wasn't bad pain, and everything else was very, very good.
Their bodies crashed together, his hands fisting in the nest of their robes as he was pushed backwards. He felt the tight straw matting scraping at his knuckles and drank in the feel of being with a man when and where the summer breeze could brush over your skin, the air at once surrounding them with warmth and drying their sweat with a comfortable chill that made it easy to be close. On Ceres, sex was had in beds, or very rarely on a couch by the fireplace, but even that could be too brisk on most nights. Certainly never on the stone floors there, and this… this was never done, coupling out in the open where the scent of flowers filled the air… Everything had been cold there: the snows, the winds, the days, and his lord's smooth hands. Everything.
Fingers ran down his face, then he felt his cheek cupped gently. He turned into the touch, taking the man's thumb into his mouth and tasting the salt sweat on his tongue. When he opened his eyes, his gaze locked into the focused, blood-ruby stare of the man he felt moving inside him. Fai knew in an instant that in the heat of their caresses his face would turn traitor to all the things he wanted to conceal, most of all at a time like this... at a time when their two bodies were moving as one toward a shared climax, when the very act of touching and being touched by this man threatened to tie fast a bond that he of all people should have known to avoid by now. And so help him... he couldn't bring himself to care. What Kurogane could see, let him see. Even if someday this man or this feeling tore his soul to shreds, this was what they both wanted now... what they both could neither delay nor deny.
He was swept up in strong arms that held him close, sitting erect and spread across Kurogane's lap, filled with too-long-restrained lust. Fai drove on as hard as he could manage. The sweet satisfactions that only kindled greater desire were always more potent in the action than in the recollection; if only for the moment, his ghosts melted out of memory in the heat and rush of their congress. He could feel the sensation surging up through his whole body, spreading from the push of his lover's shaft deep within him and stroke of skillful hands on his hot, wet skin. It ached in the best way. Passion's flame tempered his every nerve and fiber to prepare the way for that blaze so imminent he could almost taste it on the tip of his tongue, tracing the labyrinth of his lover's ear. Soon, his moans echoed from the walls behind him, mixed with the sounds of Kurogane's rough breaths, and the heat they'd been building shot through his nerves, scorching his senses with a pleasure too intense to bear, too stunning to be remembered, and too thorough to forget.
Fai shook from head to toe, clinging to the warrior's form so as not to fall while his body went limp. It was a moment before his eyes could open again, and he savored the feel of running his hand over a firm shoulder dripping with well-earned sweat. The light breeze made him shiver now that they were both still, exposed as he was, and his composure was not strengthened by the caress of an arm circling his waist, nor by the tangle of fingers in his hair. Breath on his ear formed words that seemed to hang suspended in an instant where time had forgotten to pass. Such a silly thing to hear so clearly and know you'd remember for years to come: "Is that what it takes to hear you call my name properly?" The low whisper resonated in his core, setting his frame a-quiver; unless he broke away soon, this pleasant afternoon could turn dangerous. Fai's mind was clearing, and he knew there would be problems if he let himself grow too fond. There was still someone out there sleeping, after all... someone who had taught him the pain that lay at the end of acknowledged affection. Perhaps someday his world would stop spinning, he could stop running, and there would be enough slow, sunlit afternoons to make the risks seem trivial, but this wasn't the time for silly confessions, verbal or otherwise.
So he shook his hair and stretched out his back luxuriantly, reveling in the aftermath of being well bedded. With a laughing sigh, he pushed his arms over his lover's shoulders and down his back, moving closer to taste the slow, soft kisses so common at times like these. "Well," Fai purred, "you were very good." He'd only ask for what it was reasonable to expect and safe to accept. This didn't need to be the first step on the path toward another impossible goodbye.
Kurogane rested his forehead against Fai's temple, exhaling with a sound of wry disbelief. "You and your games..." his partner whispered, and stroked his side with lazy ease. "It's ridiculous." Ever so slowly, he drew his arms in, letting them stay on the warrior's chest, and pulled back his head with a wary glance towards the red eyes whose every expression Fai had thought he'd known. The air on his damp skin made him shiver suddenly.
It was very like his companion, Fai reflected as Kurogane leaned forward and brought them both to the ground, so like him to do things this way. To make an opening and take decisive advantage. He could feel that solid form behind him as his head came to rest on his lover's shoulder; his eyes closed, and even though he knew this was the kind of mood he'd wanted to avoid, his will to protest had evaporated long before. Kurogane pulled his robe over the two of them as they lay on Fai's, keeping the breeze off their skin.
Breath stirred on the back of his neck instead, quiet words reaching his ears that Fai knew could not have been spoken while they were face to face. "I can tell where your heart is..." Kurogane said, pushing his hand up Fai's chest as he held him close. "I feel it beating." As he matched the pattern of their breathing, the rhythm of his pulse beat a slow double-count against his lover's palm. "You hide, you run, you lie..." the murmurs continued, "but I can feel it." He let their fingers tangle together and listened, not quite remembering how these moments went. "Your blood flows like any man's... Still, your skin is soft. But the eyes I like better," the whispers in his ear said in a straightforward tone, "...are the ones you hide."
Silence fell around them, even though the sounds of nature moving hummed mere feet away. Fai made no answer but to pull Kurogane's arm tighter around his chest under the makeshift blanket. In the course of his life, certainly, he'd made worse mistakes than this.