Chapter Text
“This is insane ,” Peter mumbled. “Even for us!” He was stroking his dick, trying to get it to stiffen, even as his free hand stirred the bowl of plaster on the table.
“No, it’s brilliant ,” exclaimed Sirius. He was already busy slathering the plaster over his lube-coated cock, thick and lumpy even as it shaped perfectly around his width. “Imagine these molds of our dicks laying around campus for people to find. No one will even know they’re exact replicas!” He threw his head back and cackled, still over the moon about his latest prank idea.
“ Only after we replicate them,” Remus reminded them all. “The originals are tied to our magical signatures since we’ll be using so much magic on them, and therefore will act as a conduit to our actual dicks.”
“A conduit?” James asked, looking for clarification. He knew what that meant, but he wasn’t entirely sure what it meant for these toys .
“Yeah,” Remus confirmed. “Any sensation put on the original models will be directly felt on your own dick in the same place.”
“Oh, like one of those muggle voodoo dolls, but sexy !” Sirius offered, waggling his brows. He filled his mold with red liquid silicone; it was thin and translucent, only turning opaque once it had hardened. Some dripped over the top of the mold and leaked down the side, but it was an otherwise simple process, finished in a matter of minutes.
“Exactly.” Remus pointed his wand down at his erection, instantly hardening the plaster around it before slowly sliding it off. He made a small hum of satisfaction as it came off in one swift, painless motion. He immediately set to work, pouring the silicone inside — blue for him.
James magically hardened his own mold next, once he was confident it was fully shaped. He slid it off of himself and inspected it. The outside was misshapen and flaky, but the inside was smooth, small divots from his protruding veins and his foreskin, a small shadow at the end denoting where the head of his cock began and curved forward.
He was actually eager to see what the thing would look like once it was all said and done. He took the orange liquid silicone and poured it into his mold, watching as it slowly crept to the surface.
“Does that mean I can put that pretty orange thing in my mouth once it’s hardened and make you come?” Sirius asked, gesturing to the mold in James’ hand. He grinned widely, a mischievous glint in his eyes.
James let out a laugh. “You can just put your own into your mouth,” James replied, gesturing to Sirius’ mold as he wiped the excess from the base. “Make yourself come.”
“Now that ,” Sirius said, pointing at James with a plaster-covered finger, “is a genius idea.”
“You’re both idiots,” Remus said affectionately, as he transfigured a small stand for the molds to sit in. It looked like a test tube holder, only the slots were wider, meant to accommodate the four large molds, rather than the narrow glass vials they used in potions.
Peter finally poured the green silicone into his own mold, wiping away the excess that had settled at the top. “How long do we have to let these set for?”
“Just for a few hours,” Remus said, reading over the instruction packet in his hand, “but it says to wait a full twenty-four hours to be sure. Let’s plan the prank for tomorrow night during dinner.”
They all grinned at each other as they stood their molds into the holder atop Remus’ nightstand, leaving them to harden overnight.
****
“Do you all remember the spell?” Remus asked, looking around the dorm at Remus, Sirius, and James standing around him. They were all looking down at their new dildos, running their fingers over them, surely noting the imperfections in parts of the silicone, the flawlessness in other parts.
Everyone nodded their heads.
“Geminio, ” Peter repeated, reminding everyone of the duplication spell once more.
“Right, so…” Remus trailed off, looking around at his friends one at a time. “Take the original with you and duplicate it wherever you want to, but do not lose the original .” The last few words were pointed, another reminder that losing the original would have consequences.
“Me and James will do the dorm rooms since we have the cloak,” Sirius explained. “You two do everywhere else in the castle, but remember to stay out of the Great Hall! Everyone will be in there eating.”
The Marauders agreed on their tasks and split up, their own brightly colored silicone cocks practically hanging out of their pockets. Remus and Peter made their way toward an empty classroom while James and Sirius headed toward the staircase, deciding if they would go up or down first.
“Let’s go to the dungeons,” Sirius said, a glint in his eye. “I wanna hit Regulus the worst.”
“Why do you want to put your own dick all over your brother's dorm anyway?” James asked, an eyebrow quirked.
“Because it’s funny , James,” Sirius explained. “You’re an only child. You wouldn’t understand.”
James wasn’t entirely sure he agreed with the logic, but he followed Sirius anyway, excited about leaving replicas of his admittedly nice cock in that specific dorm for those specific boys to find — not that he would tell Sirius that.
James didn’t need Sirius asking any questions. Didn’t need Sirius knowing he was entirely too smitten by the boys that lived there, his little brother included.
They threw the invisibility cloak over themselves and snuck into the dungeon behind another Slytherin student, the door swinging closed quickly behind them. Once they were inside, they scanned the common room and attempted to make sense of the place.
It was similar to the Gryffindor common room, furnishings aside. They just needed to figure out which staircases led up to the upper class dorms and which would lead to the younger students.
“Should we try to hit every dorm?” James asked, mostly mouthing the words rather than actually voicing them. He wasn’t sure if they could get in and out of every single room for all four houses without being noticed, even with most students in the Great Hall. All it would take was one student seeing them and announcing their presence for the entire thing to be fucked.
Sirius shook his head. “Fifth years and up. We need to get out fast.”
James nudged Sirius, nodding toward what must have been the seventh year dorms. “Snivellus,” he said simply. Snape walked up the set of stairs and pushed into his dorm, clearly already finished with his dinner.
At least they knew which dorms were for which grade level, even if it meant they couldn’t prank Snape and his roommates.
“This way,” James said, grabbing ahold of Sirius’ upper arm and tugging him toward the stars Snape had just gone up. They walked slowly and softly, miraculously avoiding any creaks in the floorboards or stray quills that might snap under their soles.
They gently swung the door open to the sixth year dorm and peeked inside, only sliding in and shutting the door behind them once they knew there was no one inside.
“Geminio,” James and Sirius whispered in unison once they had ridden themselves of the cloak. They watched as their dildos replicated one by one. They levitated some across the room, stuck some to the ceiling, closed some into trunks. Anywhere that they thought a dildo would fit, was where they put one.
“Which one do you think is Regulus’ bed?” Sirius asked offhandedly, even as he stuck the red dildo to every surface he could think of, regardless of James’ answer.
James looked around the room, paying close attention to which bed had rumpled sheets, which one had clutter on the nightstand, and which one was devoid of both of those things. “That one,” James said, pointing to the most organized of them all. “That’s Barty’s,” James continued, pointing to the next bed over with a variety of things littering the nightstand. “And Evan’s,” the one with the unmade bed.
Apparently, James had watched them all a bit more closely than he had realized.
Sirius nodded his head and gestured for James’ dildo, replicating both of theirs three times each before stuffing a set of both colors under all three of the Slytherin boys’ pillows.
James had to stifle his laughter, body shaking with quiet amusement.
“Hurry up,” James whisper-shouted, gesturing toward the dorm door as he held the cloak aloft. James was having too much fun with Sirius, but they had so many more dorm rooms to visit if they had any plan of making it through all upper class dorms across all four houses.
The subsequent rooms were all even easier to sneak into, the prank feeling funnier and funnier the bigger it got. The more dorms they managed to stuff full.
James and Sirius raced out of the Slytherin common room, falling into a fit of giggles the second they were out of earshot from their latest victims. They ducked into an alcove and slid down to the floor.
“Fuck, that was so good!” Sirius exclaimed, tipping his head back against the wall. “They’re all going to be so confused.”
“How many people do you think are gonna keep them?” James asked, the sudden realization that people might keep them for sex toys just slamming right into him.
Sirius only laughed more. “Shit, probably a few, at least.”
“More than a few better keep mine,” Remus said, suddenly standing beside them and flashing a wide grin. “I have a great cock.”
“Merlin, what if we take someone back to their dorm one night and they have a replica of our dick sitting on their nightstand!” Peter mused, all four of them bursting into laughter.
“That would be incredible,” James choked out. “Come on, we have so much of the school left to prank.”