Chapter Text
Chapter 1: Floyd's Musings
For the past two months Floyd had been forced to get used to this. Spending each and every day trapped inside that garish purple diamond bottle. Forced to watch those giant vanity mirrors inside the greatly undeserved dressing room/studio. Watching as Crimp activated the remote changing it to large screen televisions. Music Recordings, Music Videos, Live concerts, Interviews… even a celebrity birthday or two…every possible way there ever was to promote music Velvet and Veneer did it. And they made sure Floyd saw it.
“How did I become the Most Popular Pop Star that Mount Rageous has ever seen or will see? Well obviously my wonderful charisma...but also loads of hard work and natural talent!”
“My music influences? I’d say…ME of course! Without me to inspire ME then you wouldn’t have ME! I mean…us! Wouldn’t have us! Right Veneer?”
“Right us! Gooo us!”
To see those teenage succu-no talents flaunt HIS stolen talent was bad enough. To steal his hard-earned work even worse. But to have them draining his life from his body with every so called spritz was the hands down winner of the awful berry sugar soaked supreme sundae. Floyd shivered. Both from the essence drain as well as the random thought of that old BroZone cooking competition.
“Fans or not, learning how to cook while combining each one of our favorite flavors was a bad idea. It was like trying to eat Clay’s funderdrawers drenched in over-sugared rotten berries dipped in maple syrup, mustard and fluffleberry.”
Floyd muttered to himself before the hidden TVs flickered to life the villainous teens now on their coveted music show The Bop on Top. The Show Floyd was SUPPOSED to be on before he was captured. Gritting his teeth, especially when he heard the so-called V&V song Watch me Work started to play, he waited for the entitled narcissism to end…
Never gets old no matter how much I'm told I'm amazing,
And sure enough Velvet’s altered…angelic…voice started the song as always the teenage imitator looking beyond each smug with each play. Song Royalties no doubt. Floyd thought furiously to himself waiting for the likewise altered voice of Veneer to follow like always...
NO YOU’RE A PHONY!!!!
The smile abruptly faded from Velvet’s smug face at the sound of a new voice startling both Veneer as well as Kid Ritz. Dripping pure gold with every note, the unknown singer harmonized Veneer’s background melody to a T but had seen fit to change the lyrics now airing on live television.
Hard to get tired when I'm always on fire I'm blazin',
More like your CRAZIN!!!
That angelic falsetto came again crooning out another insult to Veneer’s growing horror and Velvet’s growing rage. Kid Ritz however discreetly directed his staff to keep filming while inside the dressing room both Floyd and Crimp are now staring in shock at the screens with varying degrees of amusement.
All my greatness
I STEAL IT ALL FOR ME!
All my talent
For TROLLS it comes NATURALLY!
Take a Breather
NO PLEASE DO…Really…
The pure sarcasm now dripping from that unknown voice finally did it as Velvet finally lost her temper. "Who is doing this?!!! When I find whatever no talent HACK who is ruining MY Show debut I will have you-"
Velvet’s would be threat was abruptly cut off when the TV monitors crackled and blurred before being replaced by a tiny cartoon figure of a troll. Said Troll waved mockingly before starting to dance and sing completely taking over the chorus. The honeyed vocals instantly drawing everyone’s attention across Mount Rageous.
Trolls we work HARD!
To make it look EASY!
Our Harmony a BLAST!
Don’t you know about that honey?
If you want to SING and do what we do
YOU GOTTA LIE YOU GOTTA CHEAT YOU GOTTA STEAL!!!!!
Watch me STEAL! Oh right….Work…riiiight.
Velvet let out an enraged yell and suddenly picked up the red chair she was sitting on to Veneer’s horror. “Velvet don’t…Don’t Do it!” The chair then hit the screen causing blackness before a Technical Difficulties logo replaced it. From inside the dressing room Crimp is staring in disbelief while inside the diamond bottle Floyd ducked his head into his arm to hide his snickers. He wasn’t amused by the viciously sarcastic call out…really.
Oh who was he kidding? Even now the memory of just a mere day ago put a smile on his face. The strange instances against Velvet and Veneer had kept recurring. The hijacked television appearance just the start of a week of full blown karma. Floyd was thankful for it. The The bad karma as Veneer called it quickly creating a domino effect.
To both fake stars horror and Floyd's great relief, spritzing wasn't working well anymore. After the last attempt apparently turned Velvet into a giant glittery mess of pink, she had stormed off to the spa. While a spooked Veneer had actually done the unthinkable...practice for more than 30 seconds.
Once the young fashionista realized his desperate attempt to shake off the bad luck coming to haunt him and his sister for their falsehoods actually stopped when he actually tried singing on his own merits, he continued to do so more often. Daily as Floyd casually suggested. Floyd had no doubt that if Veneer kept working at it instead of taking lazy shortcuts one day he might end up truly earning that Pop Star label. But as for Floyd he was relieved he was no longer turning into a decorative Knick knack. And most importantly of all was still here able to hear his brothers voices…
“Mission Failed…Mission Failed!”
Thoughts of the past gone for now, Floyd looked over from the couch inside the armadillo bus thing known as Rhonda to where John Dory sat at a table chugging down his drink surrounded by Clay, Bruce, Queen Poppy and Viva. Rolling his eyes over his brother’s dramatic antics, the magenta-haired troll settled in to listen while Clay and Bruce exchanged a look.
“More like 75% success. We hit the perfect harmony, you and Queen Poppy found me and Viva at Putt Putt Village, Bruce on Vacay Island and most importantly of all we rescued Floyd!” Clay reasoned only for JD to slam his drink down on the table.
“But we didn’t find Baby Branch! Four is not Five! There should have been Bro-NO possible way that we could have hit that family harmony. I mean obviously I’m glad we somehow managed it and Floyd is okay, but still HOW?!”
“Well…Queen Poppy and Viva are sisters and we’re brothers so that’s family. Bruce shrugged. “And sure while we have yet to find out what happened to Bitty B…thank you Snack Pack…On the bright side Bitty B wasn’t anywhere near that mess so he’s gotta be out there somewhere!”
“Right! And besides that giant mistake me and Guy, Chenille, Satin, Guy, Creek, DJ, Biggie, Cooper and Fuzzbert made right after my sixteenth birthday…which most of us still regret every day…” Poppy started to ramble before noticing the looks on her idol’s faces.
“Buuuut…even though sure Branch was right and Bergen Chef DID get attracted by my Coronation party at least all the Trolls she caught were 100% okay because as it turns out Troll Catching and Troll eating was outlawed by King Gristle Jr. not one...not two…but FIVE years earlier! Well, that and apparently, she was trying to usurp the throne but still! And bonus! I got my BF Bridget!”
“Uhhh..Poppy?” Clay tried glancing over to Viva who is clutching a fabric blanket tight.
"And I sooo got to be her bridesmaid and plan out her wedding, it’s a shame that Gristle’s special guests couldn’t make it for the Bachelor party, but I’m glad Cooper, My Dad and Cloud Guy could help last minute in their place…Oh and did you know Cooper has a twin brother?”
“Poppy?” Clay tried again as Viva started ripping the blanket into pieces.
“And I’m SURE whoever he or she…they…him…maybe both?”
“POPPY!!!” BroZone, Viva and Tiny yelled out as one causing the Pop Queen to jump from the force knocking her crown askew. Taking a moment to readjust her headpiece, the pink troll continued.
“Point is Branch is the LAST Troll who anyone Bergen or Rageon…really anyone could catch off guard! He’s just really really good at hiding! We’ll find him…eventually!” Poppy finished her smile big and toothy.
The other occupants on the bus exchanged a glance. “Right…so all mentions of an extremely not fun maliciously planned prank aside…” Clay paused briefly, he and his brothers giving the pink pop troll a dirty look. “Floyd did you choose yet?”
Floyd blinked. He had been so engrossed in his memories and the drama known as his older brothers that he had forgotten the earlier conversation. Thinking it over quickly he went over the three choices.
“Well not the Golf course for sure…” Noting the dirty looks Clay and Viva were now giving him Floyd scowled. “Hey, don’t give me that look…20 years apart is long enough plus I’ve just been tortured constantly for two months and now that I got my older brothers back I’m nowhere close to letting you go when I just got you back!” The magenta haired troll’s venom faded away noting his brothers’ looks.
“And I know this is extremely selfish of me, but I don’t want to go to Pop Village either. Sorry Viva, Poppy…I know you want to see your Dad, but right now…”
Viva quickly put up a hand stopping his apology. “Oh my gosh no worries! You’re the one who went through something so awfuorrible…So that mean Vacay Island right! Sooo FYI never been there but-”
“Oh you’ll love it. Sun, Sand, waking up to hear the ocean waves…perfect place for the Triple R!” Bruce cheered while Floyd looked confused.
“Triple R?” “Rest, Recover and Relaxation! Clay and I can even get you settled!”
“While I take the girls and Tiny back to Pop Village…We’ll do an extensive in-depth search of the whole area surrounding Forest and Bergen Town included and hopefully we’ll all meet back up on Vacay Island with Baby Branch in tow! Do we got a Bro Plan?”
Floyd, Clay and Bruce exchanged a long glance before in unison throwing up a fist making John Dory cheer. “YES! BRO PLAN!!!! LOVE IT! Onwards to Vacay island Rhonda!!!”
While the bus happily announced its approval, Floyd slowly relaxed back onto his couch staring out the window as asphalt and trees rolled by the window.
“Where are you Branch?”
Somewhere out in the world a pair of blue eyes flew open.
Imagi’s Ramblings: Yes I had fun twisting the lyrics. :D Be prepared…more questions and confusion to come I’m adding tags as I go. :D