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Caitlyn Kiramman was in love with Vi.
This she knew as she pulled Vi closer to her chest, pressing the tips of her fingers into the gentle groove of Vi’s spine. Vi let out a quiet breath, almost a sigh, and Caitlyn wanted to lock the sound away somewhere in her chest, beyond her ribs, near where her heart pounded. She’d laugh, her lips pulling a little crooked and Caitlyn wished she could reach out and capture the sound in her fist.
There were the other times too, the times Vi really did sigh but it was a darker sound, more in her throat, the sigh that came when Caitlyn was kissing her way across Vi’s throat or touching the low valley between her breasts, legs interlocked, breathing each other's air, mouths pressed together, kissing like the sun wasn’t going to rise. Caitlyn loved the way Vi’s body felt, strong and solid beneath her. She loved the sounds she made, the way her lips parted when Caitlyn would drag her fingers down her body. And though she’d had sex before, many times, it had never been with Vi. The thought of it terrified her, just a little.
She wasn’t afraid of Vi. If anything, she was afraid of how much she wanted Vi, how much she wanted to have sex with her, all the ways she wanted to make Vi feel good and desired and needed and loved. She wanted to be with Vi more than she’d ever wanted to be with anyone. It felt like every encounter, every experience she’d had up until now had been a dress rehearsal, something to help her figure out how to talk and move and touch. The timing just hadn’t been right. Sometimes, she’d wake up in the middle of the night, her body reacting to phantom touches that had only occurred in her dreams. And she’d curl up against Vi’s body to hold her and imagine the day they finally crossed that line together.
They’d been naked together many times. Showered, slept, snuggled beneath the covers. They had kissed and touched one another on every conceivable surface in her room. They even ate naked sometimes, laughing together late into the night with snacks set out between them on the bed. Vi had laid on her, resting her head on her stomach, one hand stroking Caitlyn’s arm lazily, Caitlyn’s hips pressed hard against her chest.
Once, Vi had carefully pressed her fingers beneath the waistband of Caitlyn’s shorts, but hadn’t gone much further. Her fingertips were rough against the soft skin there and she flexed them a little bit, the tips brushing into the hair that started along her lower belly and Caitlyn had frozen, overwhelmed by the feeling.
“We don’t have to do anything right now,” Vi had whispered.
And they hadn’t.
Another time Caitlyn had kissed her way down Vi’s body, tasting her everywhere - her throat, the curve of her ribs, the gentle slope of the v at her hips - but when she got to the crux of her legs, she’d become suddenly shy and Vi had assured her they had all the time in the world, that there was no rush.
Tonight, however, it felt different. They’d undressed each other slowly at the end of the long day and Vi had quietly asked Caitlyn to shower with her. They’d taken turns washing each other’s bodies, then climbed into bed naked and warm and a little sleepy. Vi nuzzled into Caitlyn, her lips pressed against her collarbone. Caitlyn wrapped one arm around Vi and held her close as Vi’s lips explored her throat and shoulders. She kissed her way up the side of her throat and along her jaw, her mouth eventually finding Caitlyn’s. The kiss was soft, tentative even, and Caitlyn slid her hand up into the hair at the base of Vi’s head, anchoring them together. Their mouths moved together in blissful harmony, slow and gentle. Vi’s fingers tightened against Caitlyn’s arm after a few minutes, then she shifted, putting more of her body weight on top of Caitlyn, her thigh pressed between Caitlyn’s legs. It was a small movement, but Caitlyn felt it everywhere. Their kisses became more impassioned and then they were wrapped up in each other, hands roaming carefully and legs slotted together and Caitlyn realized she was eager for more. Butterflies flitted around in her stomach as she tried to think of what to say.
“Vi,” she whispered as Vi pressed her mouth to her cheek.
“Hmm?”
“I think I’m ready.” The words froze Vi. She was silent for a beat and Caitlyn worried that she’d said something wrong. Quickly, she clarified, “If you are, I mean. We don’t have to have sex if you don’t want to. That’s okay, too.”
“No, no.” Vi pulled back to search Caitlyn’s face with careful eyes. “Are you sure?”
Caitlyn nodded. “Yes. I want to have sex with you.”
Vi’s answering smile could have lit the city. “I want to have sex with you, too.”
She reached up and brushed a piece of hair from Caitlyn’s cheek, then she leaned down and kissed her. It was as gentle and lingering as before and Caitlyn sighed into it as Vi wound an arm around her shoulders and lifted her slightly, holding her close. When Vi’s tongue brushed gently against her lips, Caitlyn opened them to her easily, drinking her in, tilting her head to deepen the kiss. For several minutes, Caitlyn lost herself in it as she tasted Vi. Their teeth bumped and Vi let out a small laugh that broke from between their lips. Then Vi gently bit down on Caitlyn’s bottom lip and a heat swept through her chest. She grew hard, her breath coming quicker, her heart pounding a little. There was a pleasant twist in her lower belly and she hoped Vi would touch her soon, somewhere, anywhere.
As if reading her mind, Vi leaned onto her side, one leg still between her legs and and brushed her hand down her arm, then up again, dragging her fingertips along the curve of Caitlyn’s shoulder and across her collarbone. She planted her palm flat against Caitlyn’s chest between her breasts, her fingers flexing slightly against her sternum.
“Is this okay?” she asked as she skimmed her hand sideways, just grazing Caitlyn’s breast. She glanced down to see Caitlyn’s skin break out in goosebumps, her nipple going hard with the contact.
Caitlyn shut her eyes. It was more than okay. It felt electric. “Yes,” she breathed.
Vi’s palm was warm against Caitlyn’s breast and she squeezed gently. Caitlyn’s breath caught in her throat as her thumb ghosted over her nipple, then back again. Vi looked up, caught her eye, and her gaze was hungry. She bent down and replaced her hand with her lips, brushing them against the fullness of Caitlyn’s breast, then capturing a nipple between her lips. She sucked lightly and Caitlyn arched up towards her, reaching for Vi’s shoulders and grabbing at them.
“Vi,” she gasped.
Vi was careful with her, curling her fingers around her breast. Her mouth was a little less so and Caitlyn felt dizzy as Vi experimented, using her tongue and lips and teeth to tease Caitlyn within an inch of her life. For every sharp nip of her teeth, she’d soothe it gently with her tongue. Caitlyn’s every nerve was on edge as she allowed herself to get swept up in the sensations of Vi’s warm, wet mouth contrasted with the cool air. It was a little maddening but she didn’t want it to stop. No, she’d live forever in this moment, with Vi tasting her and touching her with fingers that were both gentle and insistent.
Then those insistent fingers moved a little further down, across the planes of Caitlyn’s stomach and down further. It tickled a little and Caitlyn tensed up, her breath shallow. Vi stopped, her hand poised above her lower belly.
“Am I moving too fast?” she asked.
Caitlyn looked at Vi, at her open face and kind eyes and shook her head. “No. It feels good.”
Vi lowered her hand and left it there, pressed against Caitlyn’s hip as she watched her face. “If you need me to slow down, please tell me.”
“I will.”
Vi bent down and kissed her again and Caitlyn pressed herself close to Vi. Then Vi moved her hand a little further and dragged her fingers down along the base of Caitlyn’s shaft. Caitlyn’s entire body went still as Vi wrapped her fingers around her, her thumb pressed against the head, brushing lightly back and forth. Her hand was careful, her movements slow and deliberate and Caitlyn tried not to rock her hips up. She grabbed the sheets and squeezed her eyes shut and Vi kissed her throat and pumped her once and Caitlyn saw stars behind her eyelids. A short, hard sound broke from her mouth as Vi did it again. Her hand stilled and she pulled away from Caitlyn’s throat and Caitlyn opened her eyes to see Vi looking down at her body, a soft smile on her face.
“You’re so fucking beautiful,” she said, then looked at Caitlyn. Her eyes were so tender that it made Caitlyn’s heart stutter in her chest.
Any nerves she felt disappeared as Vi continued to take her in, her eyes running along Caitlyn’s body, admiration and warmth clear on her face. Her gaze might as well have been a lover’s touch, it was so heated and determined and Caitlyn’s body responded in kind. She grew harder where Vi’s fingers were still wrapped around her and blushed. Vi looked down at her loose fist and pulled her lower lip between her teeth. Then she tightened her fingers and pumped again and Caitlyn’s vision went a little hazy around the edges as she pushed her head back against the pillow.
Vi lifted herself onto her knees and kissed Caitlyn’s shoulder, then continued moving down her body, her lips persistent in their exploration as she stroked Caitlyn, long and slow. Without thinking, Caitlyn rocked her hips into Vi’s hand and she felt Vi smile against her ribs.
“That feel good?” she asked, her breath hot where it spilled from her mouth.
Caitlyn nodded, words failing her. It did feel good. Vi felt so good and she wanted more. Vi continued to pump her hand and kiss her way down Caitlyn’s body until she got to her lower belly where she stopped and looked up at Caitlyn.
“Can I…?” Vi asked, looking down at where she held Caitlyn, then back up again. “I’d like to taste you.”
Caitlyn’s heart started pounding anew and she swallowed thickly before answering in a hoarse voice. “Yes. I’d like that.”
Vi smiled in response. She looked pleased, excited even as she situated herself on her knees and leaned down to press an open mouth to Caitlyn’s hip. Caitlyn pushed herself up on one elbow to watch as Vi dragged her mouth over her upper thigh, then paused before hesitantly drawing her tongue up one side of Caitlyn. The entire world stood still when she opened her lips a little wider and took the head into her mouth. Vi’s mouth was warm and it was wet and Caitlyn exerted some of her considerable willpower not to jerk her hips upward at the sensation. Vi swirled her tongue a little and Caitlyn made a sound that almost embarrassed her, except for Vi’s response to it. She hummed, a pleased noise, and the sound vibrated all the way down into Caitlyn’s soul. Vi looked so beautiful there, bending down, back arched a little, her strong thighs and back tensing as she moved. Caitlyn reached out to stroke her side with her fingers.
Pulling back with a small wet pop, Vi released her and wiped at the corner of her mouth. “Am I doing this okay?” she asked, her voice a little shy as she looked up at Caitlyn.
Caitlyn gave her a small smile, her body already aching for Vi to continue. “You’re a natural,” she said, a little breathlessly.
The pink that came to Vi’s cheeks at the praise made Caitlyn’s stomach drop and she smiled a little wider. Vi smiled back, then ducked her head and once again took Caitlyn into her mouth. She dropped it down a little further and Caitlyn tried to watch. She tried valiantly but it felt so good, so good and she thought if she watched too long, she’d come too quickly and she still wanted more. So she dropped down onto her back and pressed a hand across her eyes, reveling in every movement of Vi’s mouth and tongue as it passed over the sensitive ridge at the bottom of her head. She suctioned her cheeks a little and Caitlyn’s answering gasp was strangled.
When Vi came away a second time, Caitlyn almost felt relieved. Not that she wouldn’t have enjoyed coming this way, but she wanted to be in Vi, to feel her everywhere.
“Vi,” she gasped, opening her eyes to look at her. “Would you like to…can I go inside of you?”
Vi’s eyes were dark and molten and she nodded. “Yes,” she said, breathless herself.
Caitlyn sat up and pulled Vi to her, kissing her deeply. Vi threaded her fingers into Caitlyn’s hair and pulled herself closer, nearly perching herself on her lap. There was nothing left between them, just Vi’s naked body pressed against Caitlyn’s. And when Vi ground down a little against her thigh, Caitlyn felt how wet she was and a swell of excitement swept through her. She grabbed Vi’s waist and pulled her fully onto her lap, then kissed her cheeks, her jaw, her throat, sucking a light bruise onto the base of it near her collarbone. She drew her fingers up Vi’s sides and onto her breasts and she gently kneaded them, touching her nipples with her fingertips as she grazed her collarbones with her teeth. Vi let out a low groan and angled her hips forward and pressed herself against Caitlyn and Caitlyn saw those stars again at the feeling of the wetness that had gathered between Vi’s legs.
Vi pulled back to look Caitlyn in the eye as she lifted herself slightly, then reached between their bodies to adjust Caitlyn until her head was pressed against Vi’s wetness. Caitlyn fought to keep her eyes from rolling back as Vi reached up with her other hand to cup Caitlyn’s cheek gently. Then Vi sank down slowly, her eyes widening a little. Caitlyn bit back a groan at the feeling of Vi sliding down onto her; she was so warm and wet and perfect. One of Caitlyn’s hands snaked around her side, touching her lower back gently, her fingers tightening against the flex of muscles there as Vi shifted, adjusting with a small sigh.
“Oh,” she breathed. “You feel really good.”
Caitlyn let out a small breathless laugh. “So do you.”
Vi moved experimentally, lifting up onto her knees and back down again and Caitlyn’s fingers tightened more. She pulled Vi close, pressing her forehead to her collarbone. From this vantage, she could watch Vi’s hips move against her and hear the low, quiet schlick as she moved. She felt her whole world shrink down into this moment, to the way Vi felt in her arms, the roll of her body, the soft sounds falling from her lips, the pressure of her movement against Caitlyn. Despite all of Caitlyn’s previous experience, this was new. This was sacred. This was Vi.
Vi wrapped her arms around Caitlyn’s upper back, holding onto her as she moved. Caitlyn braced herself against the bed with her other arm and gingerly lifted her own hips, pressing deeper into Vi. She was rewarded with a quiet, whispered, “ Yes. ”
They found their rhythm then, Vi grinding down onto her while Caitlyn rolled her hips up. For several blessed minutes, they stayed there, Vi on her lap while Caitlyn touched her back gently. She kissed her chest and took Vi’s nipple into her mouth and felt Vi’s blunt nails dig into her shoulder blades. Wordless sounds fell from Vi’s lips, light whines and quiet groans and a near purr when Caitlyn’s fingers tightened hard around the swell of her ass. She focused on Vi’s pleasure, touching her wherever she could reach her, pressing open mouth kisses anywhere she could find. She reached between them and thumbed Vi’s clit and Vi cried out.
“Please,” she whimpered, catching Caitlyn’s wrist and holding it there, urging her to continue. “More.”
Vi began moving more earnestly and Caitlyn swore under her breath. She only had so much willpower and her inevitable end was drawing near.
“Caitlyn,” Vi said, her voice rough. “I think I’m close.”
Caitlyn began to let go a little then. She still thumbed Vi’s clit, swirling the pad of her finger around the swollen head, then sank into the sensation of Vi’s walls beginning to tighten around her. She took a long, deep breath and let it out slowly. Then Vi tensed up, her fingernails once again biting into Caitlyn’s back and she keened, her whole body shuddering down onto Caitlyn, hard. Trembling, Vi continued to rock against Caitlyn, growing impossibly wet, clenching around her and then Caitlyn couldn’t hold onto the control anymore. Taking her hand from between their bodies, she wrapped her arm around Vi’s lower back and held onto her as she felt the tension in her body coil ever tighter. And when Vi gasped out, “I’m coming,” Caitlyn came too. She tried to focus through the haze of her orgasm, to give Vi the attention she deserved, but she felt so good. She was so tight and so wet where she clenched around Caitlyn and she could do nothing but thrust up into Vi helplessly, burying her face into Vi’s neck as she nearly wept with relief at the release she found there. Vi rocked one last time against her, then stilled, her body moving from Caitlyn’s actions alone, the fingers of one hand tangled in Caitlyn’s hair, the other pressed palm flat against her back as if to keep Caitlyn together.
Caitlyn shuddered one more time, her chest heaving with exertion, then she sat there with her face pressed against the crook of Vi’s shoulder and took in one long breath. She brushed her fingers against Vi’s spine, feeling the dampness of the sweat that had broken out. Vi shivered lightly and let out a breath of her own. They sat together, still tangled up, the night air cooling their sweat slicked skin. Caitlyn listened to Vi breathe, then her lungs hitched a little and Caitlyn pulled back to look at her. Vi turned her face away, pressing her cheek to her own shoulder but Caitlyn saw the tears there.
“Are you okay?” she asked, concern knotting her eyebrows together. She reached up to touch Vi’s cheek. “Did I hurt you?”
Vi shook her head and Caitlyn saw her throat move as she swallowed. “I-I just…” Vi paused and took a shaky breath, then looked at her. “I just love you so much, you know?”
This was it, the penultimate sound that Caitlyn wanted to capture. Deep in her bones, she knew she’d never lose the sound of Vi telling her she loved her, her voice hoarse but careful. It was there, tucked in next to her pounding, fluttering heart.
Caitlyn’s own breath caught. “I love you, too,” she answered with no hesitation.
Vi looked at her then and her eyes were soft and glistening with tears and her lips were parted slightly, her cheeks flushed and her hair mussed and Caitlyn wanted to live in this moment forever. And in the days and weeks and months and years that followed, each time Vi told her she loved her, she’d clasp her fingers around the sound and tuck it next to her heart, and each time was like the first: beautiful, a little breathless, and exactly perfect.