Archive of Our Own

        The worst of it was, she wasn't even expecting it. No one had ever told Xion girls couldn't join the army. Sure, she'd been told she couldn't do things - don't talk back, don't pretend like you're trying when you're clearly not, because if you were trying you'd get it right for once in your miserable life, and, most importantly, don't touch that - but that was just because she was a pathetic excuse for a specimen, not even worth the expense of feeding, he didn't know why he bothered with her at all, she was so useless. Which had nothing to do with her being female at all. She wasn't even sure if anyone had actually noticed she was; she was mostly referred to as an 'it', after all.

        Still, it meant that when she finally ran away to join the army - because she'd read a few books, when they were teaching her basic skills, and that's what you did, right? That, or the circus, but there wasn't a circus in town when she left, so that was out - she really wasn't expecting the officers to laugh in her face. She wasn't expecting it at all.

        Still, she didn't really have any other options, so she did the only thing she could think of. She dressed herself up as a boy, and joined the army the next town over. It took a couple of days to walk there, but it wasn't as though she had anything better to do. And it rained a lot, so she didn't die of thirst. And two days is hardly any time at all, to go without food.

        The army was a lot of work, and no one took her at all seriously even when she was getting the best marks out of everyone in basic training, but at least there was food and clothes and the barracks were warm enough she didn't have to worry about catching hyperthermia overnight, and they were even giving her money. Not much, by the way the other boys grumbled, but she'd never been given money before. Not of her very own.

        So, she was more or less content with life, in the army.

        Then she got transferred into special ops, and everything changed.

        For one, they caught on to the fact that she was a girl in about two seconds flat - but that was okay, because that made her the second girl in the squad, and even though Xion's not really sure she likes Larxene it's kind of nice to not have to hide it.

        And two, she has friends, now. Two friends, which is two more friends than she ever thought she'd have in her life. They laugh together, eat together, and sleep in the same tent when they're on the same missions. They fight side-by-side, close enough that sometimes she gets splattered by someone else's kill.

        It's not perfect - their direct CO is... well, he's pretty much a vulture crossed with a lion crossed with a robot, and Xion hates him, and sometimes missions are really bad, and there're still some days when she forgets things, or remembers things she never lived through... but it's still good. It's still good.

        And good is so much better than she'd ever even dreamed of.