Work Text:
Maria looked at the furniture catalogue on the tablet Tony had given her. Friday had helpfully highlighted a few items she might like based on the discussions they’d had. She had gotten used to talking to Friday as if the AI was a real person – it was a little weird because Friday wasn’t physically there, so Maria never quite knew where to look, but if not for that Maria would never have guessed she was a computer program. It really was amazing the things Tony had done. Friday’s suggestions seemed very nice, and Maria spent several minutes making plans. The apartment was quite nice as it was, of course, but if she was going to live here permanently, she wanted to give it her personal touch, and neither Howard nor Tony had had any objection to that. On the contrary, they’d encouraged her, probably thinking she’d like something to occupy her mind with.
In truth, she was grateful for that. It was still hard to wrap her head around the thought that she’d died and come back to life 30 years in the future. She tried very hard not to think of her death, or of the man who had killed them – a man who had been a friend of Howard’s, dear lord – though it didn’t always work. During the day there was usually something to do, someone to talk to – Howard, Tony, Friday, Tony’s friends – so it was easy to keep focused, but at night it was a different story. She’d asked Dr Banner (Bruce, as he asked to be called) for sleeping pills yesterday, sick of not being able to sleep for the nightmares. Hopefully they would help and she would stop feeling so tired all the time.
“How long do you think it will it take to deliver the new furniture, Friday?”
“Depends on what you order, Mrs Stark, but it shouldn’t be more than a few days. A week at the most, probably. Unless it needs to be made. That might delay it, but we can rush it.”
Maria thought about it, and decided there was no real hurry. She told Friday her choices and left the AI to make the necessary arrangements. Friday had assured her that it was no problem, that it was part of her job to oversee all matters within the Tower and take care of its inhabitants’ needs – she had access to Tony’s accounts to pay for things and organize whatever was necessary.
With that done, Maria went to the kitchen to get dinner started. While ordering food was practical and easy, sometimes she wanted to actually cook – it was something familiar, after all, and it wasn’t like she had much else to do anyway. She’d loved her job at the Foundation, but that was gone now, obviously. She’d have to find a hobby or something to occupy herself more permanently once the redecorations were done.
Tony was in meetings all day today, dealing with “Accords stuff”, as he’d put it. It made her glow with pride to see how well he had done for himself and how seriously he took his responsibilities. Howard was in the lab, exploring and tinkering with things (and Friday had promised she was keeping an eye on him so he wouldn’t get hurt – Maria knew what her husband was like with new toys to play with, and safety wasn’t always a concern). She was rather proud of him too, for working things out with Tony. And it was good to see him doing something for fun; it had been too long since he’d been happy. She’d tried, unsuccessfully, to get him to relax more, to delegate some things and not work so much, but he was stubborn and after being snapped at one too many times, she’d given up. He’d become quite the unpleasant grouch in the last couple of years, so it was good to see him at ease again.
The ingredients for lasagna were laid out and organized before she got the pans and utensils – she could never stand a messy workspace (which was part of the reason she’d stopped going into Howard’s office. He might be a genius, but, dear lord, he couldn’t get organized to save his life. Heaven only knew how he’d gotten by before Jarvis, who was the absolute picture of tidiness, to get things to a manageable level. She missed Jarvis.) She’d instituted family dinner so they could have a chance to talk and catch up, since most of the day Tony was busy with his work and Howard was too wide-eyed about the technology of the future, now that he and Tony were on speaking terms, to pay much attention to anything else.
There was a lot she still needed to know about Tony’s life (and the world) and the cliff’s notes Tony had given them had not been particularly cheerful (more accurately, it’s been rather terrifying the number of times her baby’s life had been in danger), but Tony had asked her to let him tell her in his own time, so she was honoring that. Talking over dinner in a relaxed environment was easier, and it had the added bonus of ensuring that Tony got a proper meal. Friday had told her that he was better about remembering to eat nowadays (which implied there was a time when he hadn’t been), but it made her mother’s heart feel better if she could see him eat with her own eyes – he still looked a little too haggard for her taste. The others Avengers occasionally joined them, though tonight it would be just the three of them. Tomorrow evening they’d finally get the chance to meet Ms Potts, and Maria was really looking forward to it.
Once she’d gotten everything underway, Maria sat on the couch to relax a bit and watch the news, even though she was aware that Friday, at Tony’s request, was filtering some things out. There was a great deal of celebrity gossip and some political commentary that Maria didn’t quite understand despite Friday’s attempt at contextualization. One piece of news mentioned the possible sighting of the former Avengers in Peru, though the report said it’d been a hoax. Friday changed the channel before Maria got more than that.
“Would you not prefer to watch a movie, Mrs Stark?”
Maria rolled her eyes at Friday’s obvious attempt to distract her. “All right, Friday.” She wasn’t going to be put off for much longer, though; she disliked being treated as a child who needed to leave the room when the adults were talking.
*****
Howard and Tony walked out of the elevator arguing good-naturedly about something, grease on their faces and hands (what had they been doing? Wasn’t Tony supposed to be in meetings?). Maria smiled to herself as she watched them – it was good to see them getting along, finally. They came over to the table and sat with a distracted nod to her. Before they could reach for the food she cleared her throat loudly.
“Mom?” Tony paused with hands outstretched. It still hurt a bit to think she’d missed so much of his life, that he was no longer the gangly teenager she remembered, but she was trying to focus on the positive.
“You two need to wash up, you’re filthy.” She didn’t even bother to hide her amusement as they checked themselves and realized she was right.
“Sorry mom.” He gave her a sheepish grin and got up, heading for the bathroom. Howard followed him.
Maria shook her head fondly and sat down to wait for her boys.
Dinner was a pleasant affair these days, without any yelling or sullen silences. She’d despaired, back in the day – the days before she’d died – that those two would ever stop fighting. It was good to see that her prayers had been answered, even if it took them dying and coming back to life to accomplish it. Maria was a practical person, after all, and if something worked… well, who cared how unconventional it was? (Though she could have done without the nightmares).
“Mom?”
“Yes, honey?”
Tony looked nervous, hands twisting the napkin in his hands. “I… uhm, so there are some things I need to tell you, some stuff that I’ve sorta… glossed over.” He shared a look with Howard, who also seemed nervous. Odd.
Maria reclined a bit in her chair and studied them. Whatever it was, it was clear that Howard already knew. She couldn’t help feel a bit left out, that they had secrets from her, but she understood that they’d had a lot they needed to say to each other, and that they’d needed to do it on their own, to find their own footing. From what little Tony had revealed of his life, Maria knew that there were a lot potentially difficult issues to tell them, starting with all the times he had apparently nearly died. She’d tried not to let it bother her, that her boy seemed to be in constant danger of being killed – after all, he wasn’t just getting into fights for fun, but was trying to protect the world. He was a hero, and even if she would prefer he get a safer job, it wasn’t her decision to make. She’d thought she’d have more time to get used to thinking of her little boy as an adult, but… well. Here they were.
“All right, honey. Why don’t we go into the living room? We’ll be more comfortable.”
Maria and Howard settled on the couch. Tony sat in the armchair and then immediately got up again. He took a deep breath and sat back down, looking at them.
“Okay, so first of all I’m fine now, so don’t worry, okay?”
Maria nodded, though that seemed like a very bad sign about the kind of things she was about to hear. Howard clenched his fists and said nothing.
“All right. Well, I told you before that I got kidnapped by terrorists. So, what happened was that… uhm… Obadiah had been selling SI weapons to them for a while and he decided that he wanted me out of the way, so he paid them to kill me during a weapon’s demonstration in Afghanistan. Only they didn’t kill me, they wanted me to build weapons for them instead.”
Maria heard the words, but they didn’t quite register. Obadiah? Obadiah had tried to kill her baby? Though she’s never really liked him all that much – he had that sleazy air that she hated – this was… no. How could he? And selling weapons to terrorists? Dear god…
It took a few moments for Maria to realize Tony had stopped talking and was looking at her strangely. “Mom?”
Obadiah had tried to kill her son. For money, no less. Or to keep from being found out in his illegal dealings. “Where is he now?” she asked. Prison, she hoped.
“Uhm, he’s dead.”
“Good.” She turned to Howard. He wasn’t surprised, he already knew this. God, how he must have felt hearing this… He’d thought of the man as a friend, had trusted him... Maria couldn’t honestly say she’d ever trusted him much; she’d known plenty of men like him, who thought they were special because they had money. He’d always been rather condescending to her. Still, being smarmy was one thing, being a murderer and a traitor? That was something else entirely. How dare that bastard threaten her son? “How did he die?”
“Uhm, he… he got blown up, sorta. He built a suit of his own and used… well, he stole my Arc Reactor to use as a power source. I guess he was kinda unhinged by that point, ‘cause that was really stupid. Attacking me with the suit, I mean. Well, everything, really. Anyway, we fought and… I won, I guess. It was sorta covered up, the whole thing. SHIELD was there. They… Agent Coulson helped Pepper get away from Obie. There was plenty of evidence about the stuff he’d been doing, but since he was already dead…” he shrugged. “We still cleaned house at SI and put a bunch of people in jail.”
“Son of a fucking bitch,” Howard said, and Maria had to agree.
“Did he hurt you?” When Tony frowned, she elaborated. “Did he actually hurt you? With his own hands, I mean.” It was a lot easier to pay someone to do the dirty work, after all, but doing it himself…
“Well, uhm. Yeah. He… took the Arc Reactor out. I got the old one before my heart was ripped to shreds.”
“What?!” Howard exclaimed. Tony must not have given him all the details.
“Hey, calm down. I’m fine now, remember?” It wasn’t as comforting as Tony thought.
“Tell us what happened, honey.” Maria said gently, even though it was obviously going to give them more nightmares.
So Tony told them about being hit by a SI weapon used by terrorists, waking up in a cave with a car battery attached to his chest to keep shrapnel out of his heart. He told them about the man who had saved his life and helped him build the suit to escape, and about the miniaturized Arc Reactor he’d built to save his own life. About building the Iron Man suit to get his weapons back and protect people. About the backlash to his decision to stop weapons manufacture and Obie’s second murder attempt. All the while Maria sat there, rage and despair building up inside her with no foreseeable outlet, since the people involved were already dead. There was nothing she could do about any of it now, no way to protect her baby. She was useless. Utterly and completely useless.
She didn’t realize she was crying until she felt Tony’s arms around her and heard his voice in her ear.
“Mom. Mom, come on, it’s okay. Mom, please.”
She hugged him; her little boy who had been through so much all alone.
“I’m sorry, baby, I’m so sorry. We should have been there to protect you.”
Tony hugged her back, settling next to her on the couch. “It’s okay, mom. I’m all right now, all that is over now. Everything is fine now.”
It didn’t help. She still felt like she’d failed him. Her precious son, lied to and betrayed by a man he’d trusted. It was probably a good thing Stane was already dead, because right now she could have happily strangled the man with her bare hands and not lose a wink of sleep over it.
*****
As she’d predicted, even the sleeping pills couldn’t keep the nightmares away that night. Maria found herself staring at the New York sky in the early hours of the morning. Tony’s offer of a therapist was looking better every day. She wasn’t sure how to cope with all of this.
“Couldn’t sleep?” Howard asked, joining her in front of the massive windows.
She didn’t answer, gaze still at the sky.
“Maria. Come on.”
“What? What am I supposed to do?” She turned in his direction. Her vision was blurry.
He stood there just as helpless as she was, just as lost.
“What are we supposed to do?” She asked again.
Howard shook his head and held her. “I don’t know. I wanna kill someone, but I can’t. And even if I could it wouldn’t change anything. There is nothing to do now. It’s driving me nuts, but… Fuck it, we have another chance here. Wallowing in misery isn’t gonna help anything.”
He was right, of course. They weren’t supposed to do anything because there was nothing to be done. The past was past. Only the future mattered now.
It was still hard.
“Also, I hate to tell you, but there’s more.”
“More what?” she asked, stepping back to wipe her eyes. She knew, but she didn’t want to know.
“More shit, more betrayal. You gotta…” he sighed. “We gotta keep our heads here, Maria. Otherwise we’ll go crazy.”
She took a deep breath. “Tell me.”
“Tony said he wanted to be the one to tell you.”
“No, I’m done being treated like a child. You know something about our son, you tell me. I have a right to know. He’s my son too.”
He hesitated for a few moments, then sighed again and led her to the couch. “It’s not good.”
“Yes, I figured that out on my own, thank you. Just tell me.” A part of her dreaded whatever was coming, but the other part just wanted it done with. Like ripping a band-aid off, just get it done. Leaving her to imagine even more horrors befalling her little boy wouldn’t help anything.
Though she had tried to prepare herself, the things she heard still hit her like a punch to the gut. How could those people, those former Avengers, have done such terrible things to someone who should have been a friend? And to those they were supposed to protect? Obviously they didn’t consider Tony a friend and that… God, that infuriated her. She remembered Tony, small and lonely, unable to relate to his peers, putting on a brave face and telling her it was okay that there was no one to invite for his birthday party. She had wanted to cry then, but she’d put on a brave face of her own and told him that they would have a good time with just the family. It wasn’t fair. Oh dear lord.
She wasn’t sure how long they stayed there. At some point the sun began to rise, painting the sky a soft blue. It was a lovely sight yet it hardly registered. It seemed almost impossible that the sun was still there, rising as always, while her heart felt torn to shreds. There wasn’t even room for anger right now, just sadness. She felt achy all over, as if she’d been beaten to a pulp – like her baby had been.
Howard had raged and cursed as he’d filled her in on all the ways their baby had been hurt, but now he just sat there like her, tired and heartbroken.
One day, she vowed, those people would pay.
*****
Maria sat in the armchair, staring off into space. She hadn’t been able to go back to bed. She didn’t know what to think about everything Howard had told her. It didn’t seem possible that the people Tony had trusted could have been so callous towards him.
All Maria had ever known about Captain America was wartime propaganda and the few stories Howard had told her about the man. She’d been a child when the war started, and her mother had been worried that their Italian ancestry would cause them problems. Her father had done everything possible to distance himself from any hint of sympathy with the Italian regime of the time, denouncing Mussolini at every turn and saying how glad he was that he’d been able to leave before the war had started. People had still sometimes looked at them suspiciously, and Maria had learned to keep her head down.
The girls in her neighborhood had swooned over Captain America, but Maria had never cared much about him. He was good-looking, she had to give him that, but big muscles had never done much for her. She could never imagine having any sort of conversation with him – he’d probably only want to talk about war and horrible things. When it was announced that he’d died, most of the neighborhood had mourned and Maria had thought it was awful that people made such a fuss about him. So many others had died too, including some of her neighbors, people who had gone off to fight and never came back. Why was he so much more important than everyone else?
She had met, through Howard, several of Rogers’ friends from the war. She’d never really liked any of them, except for Peggy Carter (though Maria had resented her a little for knowing a side of Howard Maria had never been able to reach). They spoke of a great man who had given his life for the world (so had thousands of others, she’d always thought). It was very unlikely that Rogers had been as perfect as people had made him out to be, though obviously she had never voiced that thought to any of them. If they wanted to think of their fallen friend that way, well, what harm could it do?
Apparently quite a lot, since even when the man had been brought back to life people had still thought he could do no wrong.
The thing was, people were flawed. Everyone. No one could ever be perfect, or right all the time. It simply wasn’t possible. And if there was one thing Maria had always hated was people who thought too much of themselves and too little of everyone else. Her father had been like that, looking down at her (and her mother) because she was a woman while reaping praise on any wealthy man he came across. He’d always thought himself so far above her, never took her seriously – and had ended up broke because he refused to listen to her advice (because, as he’d made abundantly clear, no woman, even an educated one, could ever know more about business than him, a man). It had served him right.
He had thought that he’d won when she’d married Howard, as he had always told her getting a degree was a waste of time, she just needed a husband (as if a woman’s only value was in serving a man). He’d thought it would be his way to an easy fortune and an end to all his financial problems. God, she’d been so angry – as if her decision to get married had had anything to do with him, as if she wasn’t capable of making decisions for herself that benefitted herself. Unfortunately for him, Maria had not been inclined to help him in the slightest. On her advice, Howard had not given her father a single dime, and he’d had to declare bankruptcy on his business. She hadn’t even done it to be petty, but because investing in her father’s doomed business would have been a bad decision for Howard. Unlike her father, Howard had respected her enough to listen to her advice. He didn’t always agree with her, but he listened and took her opinion into consideration before making a decision.
Steve Rogers, like her father, didn’t seem like he valued any opinion that wasn’t his own, and didn’t care for people except for how he could use them to his advantage (like her father had tried to use her). The people who’d sided with Rogers during the so-called Civil War might have thought they were doing the right thing because Rogers said so, but they would eventually realize that they’d thrown their lives away for nothing. And if they were stupid enough to follow the man blindly, then they deserved it. Maria would make sure they paid the price for their stupidity. For hurting her son and everyone else they’d trampled on. She had never believed Captain America was better than everyone else, and she sure as hell didn’t now.
*****
The first time Maria had gotten pregnant, she’d made a million plans. Though she had never told anyone, she had wished for a girl (even if she knew Howard would prefer a boy). She’d been happy and excited, and then it all fell apart. She had laid in bed for a full day after the miscarriage, wondering if she’d done something wrong, something to harm her baby, even though the doctors had told her that those things just happened sometimes. She’d been miserable. Though Howard had acted stoic, she knew he’d been sad too. Sad and angry. He’d been in an awful mood for weeks afterwards, and Maria could hardly stand to be around him. They’d had a huge fight that had ended with her stomping off in tears months later. She didn’t know for sure, but she suspected Jarvis had intervened at that point and given her husband the stern talking to he’d needed to snap out of it.
The second time, they’d all been more cautious, trying not to get their hopes up too much. Still, when she’d miscarried again, it had hurt just as much as the first time.
She’d seen a lot of doctors after that, and both she and Howard had submitted themselves to all kinds of tests to try to figure out what the problem was. They’d found nothing.
When she’d gotten pregnant for the third time she had been terrified she’d lose that one too. At that point she didn’t care whether she got a boy or a girl so long as she had a healthy child. She’d followed every doctor’s recommendation to the letter, eaten everything they told her to and spent as much time in bed as they said. Howard had hired a nurse to stay with her all day, monitoring both her and the baby as the pregnancy progressed. She’d been in a state of tense anticipation the entire time. Finally, at the third trimester, when the chances of miscarriage were much lower, she’d breathed a sigh of relief but maintained her vigilance all the same.
In spite of everyone’s best efforts, Tony had still been born couple of weeks earlier than the ideal time. Fortunately, he’d been healthy enough, and that was all she’d cared about.
The first time she’d held her baby in her arms, Maria had felt like the happiest woman in the world. There had been her baby boy, tiny fingers and toes, and a tuff of dark hair on his head. He had lovely brown eyes and the most adorable little face. She’d looked at her son and fell completely in love; she’d known it had all been worth it. (And she’d thanked God fervently, since she didn’t think she’d be able to go through it a fourth time; it’d felt like her last chance and she’d made it.)
It was bittersweet to look at him now, having grown up while she wasn’t there to see him. She remembered him as she’d last seen him that last dreadful night: 17 years-old and trying not to let on how upset he was by the fight with his father. She’d wanted to knock their heads together. She’d hoped that after their vacation Howard would be in a better mood. Looking back on it now, she felt like she should have done more to bridge the gap between them, maybe insist that they sat down and talk instead of going off in a huff to lick their wounds each in their own corner.
The truth was that, as much as she loved her boy, Tony had always been his father’s son. There was so much of Howard in him, it had always made her feel as if she could never quite reach him. He’d go on about the things he was building and Maria could only understand a word in five. She’d tried her best to listen anyway and offer praise and encouragement, but she’d felt lost half the time.
It hadn’t been a problem when he was a baby, and she would spend hours with him, watching his every move with adoration, playing the piano to him and singing softly while he just smiled his cute baby smile. Then at three he was already learning to read and she’d begun to realize that her boy had inherited his father’s intelligence. From then on she’d known he would only grow apart from her.
Still, she could see now (hindsight was 20/20, as the saying went) that maybe she’d resented Tony’s affinity with Howard more than she’d realized. Maybe she’d wanted to keep her baby to herself and didn’t do as much as she could have to help her two stubborn men deal with their issues. It wasn’t a flattering thought. She’d have to talk to the therapist about that.
There was just a lot to process, a lot to reflect on. Could she have made things better if she’d made different decisions? Could she have helped Tony more than she did? Would it have made any difference in the later events in his life? While she knew, intellectually, that this line of thinking was pointless, she couldn’t help herself. Tony had suffered so much grief and pain… And she hadn’t been there for him. She’d sworn to herself when he’d been born that she’d always be there for him, and she’d failed. It wasn’t a rational thought, obviously, she was aware of that, yet it stayed there, niggling at her. Would her own mother have felt the same had she come back to life after Maria had grown? (Her mother had died when Maria had been 14, only a little younger than Tony himself had been).
“Mrs Stark?” Friday asked, jolting her.
Maria sighed and tried to push those thoughts away. “Yes, Friday?”
“Pardon me, ma’am, but I thought you might like a distraction. Making dinner plans, perhaps?”
“Yes, thank you, Friday. That’s a good idea.”
*****
After some thought, Maria had decided to cook dinner herself again. Friday had been right that she needed a distraction now more than ever, lest she found herself in another depressed funk that would help no one. They were meeting Ms Potts tonight, so she thought it would be nice to have a home cooked meal. As she understood, Ms Potts had been quite busy these last few weeks with business meetings and trips overseas to finalize several important deals for the company. Being CEO was a difficult job, and Maria imagined being a woman didn’t make it any easier. It was good to see that a woman could be CEO now. From all she’d heard and what Tony had told them, Ms Potts was doing very well. According to Friday, things had gotten better in terms of female equality in the last three decades, but it was still far from ideal.
Maria had asked Friday’s input in choosing something that the other woman would appreciate; it seemed important to make a good first impression, since Ms Potts was someone who meant a lot to Tony, even if they were no longer romantically involved. With dinner underway, Maria also took some time to consider what she would wear. Her wardrobe was still rather more modest that it used to be, but Friday had arranged for some lovely outfits (and had gotten her jewelry back from storage). She would have to go shopping eventually. Perhaps she could invite Ms Potts. Maria’s fashion sense was probably outdated, and she could use some advice. It would also be a good excuse to spent time together and get to know Ms Potts better. Tony’s other friends were easier to spent time with by virtue of living right here in the Tower.
Since she was at it, she took the liberty of choosing an outfit for Howard as well. She had done so in the beginning of their marriage – it was a wife’s duty, she’d thought – until they had drifted too much apart for her to feel comfortable doing it (and a part of her had hoped that Howard would notice it and ask her about it, which had never happened).
By the time Ms Potts was due to arrive, everything was ready. Howard had come back from the workshop, showered and dressed while talking her ear off about the wonders of the future. It had made her smile, remembering the good old days when that had been part of their routine – not the talking about the future, but telling her about his work with enthusiasm, sharing things with her, even if all she could do was nod and smile back at him.
Tony came in with Ms Potts, a slightly nervous beat in his step.
“Mom, dad, this is Pepper. Pepper, mom and dad.”
Ms Potts was more beautiful in person than in the pictures and videos Maria had seen. She carried herself with a confident air, her clothes and hair meticulously perfect. An accomplished and successful woman.
Maria smiled warmly at her and kissed her cheek. “It’s such a pleasure to meet you, Ms Potts, we’ve heard wonderful things about you.”
“Please, call me Pepper,” Pepper said, smiling back and shaking Howard’s hand. “It’s nice to meet you too.”
“Come have a seat.” Maria guided Pepper to the couch and offered her a drink (sparkling cider, as she’d gotten rid of all the alcohol in the apartment – didn’t want Howard to fall into temptation).
“I have to say it was quite a shock when Tony told me that you were back. I confess I was a bit skeptical.”
Maria could hardly blame her, all things considered. “It was quite a shock for us as well,” she replied. It still was, in truth (with more shocks every day, it seemed). “It’s taken some getting used to.”
“Yes, I imagine so. If there is anything I can do to make things easier for you, please let me know.”
Well, that was a good opportunity, Maria thought. “Actually, there was a favor I wanted to ask you, if you’re not too busy.”
“Of course.”
“Well, I need some new clothes and I’m not really up on current fashion.”
Pepper grinned. “Oh, it would be my pleasure.”
“Well, now I’m starting to get worried,” Tony said, watching them fondly. “I have a feeling this team up is not gonna bode well for me.”
“The world does not revolve around you, Tony. I’m sure your mother and I will have lots of things to talk about that have nothing to do with you.”
Maria laughed. “Oh, I like you, Pepper. We’re gonna get along very well.”
The rest of the evening was quite pleasant. Pepper Potts was a very nice person. Maria was sad that things had fallen apart between her and Tony; they had probably made a lovely couple (and would have had lovely children). It was clear that Pepper really cared about Tony and the work he’d been doing with the Accords and the New Avengers. Maria was happy to see that Tony had real friends (not those awful people who thought it was okay to use him and then beat him up). Her boy had always been too lonely and isolated from his peers. It was good that Tony had a support system now, and that the world also recognized his efforts and contributions as a hero.
*****
Their shopping expedition was done the next day, and Maria enjoyed it immensely. She had not really gone outside since she’d been taken to the Tower after seeing grown-up Tony for the first time, a couple of weeks ago. It wasn’t that she was forbidden from leaving, of course, she’d just hadn’t really been inclined to. Adjusting to her new circumstances had taken up most of her time. And, if she honest, she was also a little scared of being on her own – New York was not as familiar as it had once been.
Maria and Pepper went to several shops, where they received the best possible treatment, and Maria was able to fill up her wardrobe to her satisfaction. Not that she’s have a lot of places to go just yet, at least until they finalized the arrangements for her new identity, but she liked to be prepared. They stopped for lunch and talked about general subjects – mostly about progress in the feminist movement – for a while.
It was during dessert that she bought up the most difficult subjects.
“I understand you and Tony were together for a while,” she said as diplomatically as possible. She did not want to give the impression that she was judging or disapproving.
Pepper sighed. “It’s… complicated. We tried. We both did, but… I guess it wasn’t meant to be. I love Tony, I do.” She looked at Maria earnestly, as if worried she wouldn’t be believed.
“I know, dear, I can see that.”
“But… it was just… too much. Things just kept happening, worse and worse things and I… I couldn’t cope.” Pepper lowered her eyes, fidgeting with the fork in her hand.
Maria reached out and took her hand. It was a shame that things hadn’t worked out, but Maria could understand. There had been moments when she’d thought that she couldn’t cope either – Howard’s distance, his secrets, the weight of trying to keep everything from falling apart – times when she had thought of walking away. She hadn’t, but she’d had her son to consider. She could not judge Pepper for choosing what was best for her. “I understand.”
Pepper smiled. “You are every bit as lovely as Tony always said.”
“Thank you, dear.” She took a deep breath. “Now, about these terrible things that keep happening, this… Civil War. Do you think those people will be found?"
The smile dropped from Pepper’s face, replaced by a scowl. “I wish there was something I could do about that, Mrs Stark, but until we find out where they are hiding, my hands are tied. Friday and I have compiled a great deal of evidence against them, so we’ll be ready to prosecute them to the fullest extent of the law whenever we get the chance.”
“That’s good to know.”
“They will not get away with it, that I promise you.”
Maria nodded and they went back to more pleasant topics.
*****
Now that she knew the whole story, Maria asked Friday to show her news clips and stories about the Civil War, to give her a better understanding of the politics involved in it. She and Howard watched several press conferences Tony gave on the subject in the aftermath, where he denounced his former teammates’ actions without giving too many details. It wasn’t really necessary, as public record was more than enough to condemn them. The footage from the airport fight in particular, when Tony had clearly and repeatedly attempted to resolve the situation peacefully, and which had ended with James’s horrifying fall and subsequent injury, was very damaging.
“Hey, what the hell,” Tony said, coming into the apartment and seeing the images on the TV. “Friday!”
“Sorry, Boss. They asked to see news coverage of certain events.”
“Your father told me what happened, Tony.”
“What?” He sent Howard a betrayed look. “The hell, dad –”
“I asked him to,” Maria said, coming closer. “I needed to know. I deserved to know.”
“I was going to tell you, mom.”
“I know, honey. I just wanted to get it over with. After you told us about Stane, I just wanted to get it all done.” She sighed. “Oh, baby.” She hugged him, and promised herself she wouldn’t fail him again.
“It’s okay, mom. I’m okay now.”
He wasn’t, but she wasn’t going to argue.
They sat down together on the couch and Tony gave them a few more details about the lead-up to the airport.
“So how come Spider-Man isn’t an official Avenger?” Maria asked, trying to switch to a lighter topic.
Tony squirmed a bit in his seat. “Oh, well… That’s… uhm… well, technically he’s… uhm… 16?”
Maria stared at him and noticed that Howard had the same incredulous look on his face as she did. “What?”
“Yes, well… it’s… uhm…”
“Are you telling me you took a child to that fight?” She gestured at the TV, still paused on a news story about the airport battle.
“I didn’t know it was going to be a fight! I thought I could talk them down. He wasn’t supposed to get hurt!”
“Have you lost your mind? Tony!”
“Okay, yes, it was bad, I know that. I was kinda desperate, okay? I’m sorry.” He hunched in on himself like a chastised kid.
“No, Tony, it’s not okay. Oh my god, what were you thinking? And… he’s still doing it. We saw him on that fight with that Rhino person not that long ago!”
Tony grimaced. “He just… keeps getting involved.”
“I see. So you’re saying it’s his fault.” Maria gave him her best disapproving look.
“No, that’s not what I said.”
“And does he have his parents’ permission to be fighting enhanced people? Did you talk to them?”
“Uhm… his parents are dead, I think.”
“Who’s his guardian then?”
“His aunt.”
“Does she know about any of this?”
By his expression, Maria already had her answer, but she waited and glared at him until he actually answered. “No.”
“Tony!”
“He asked me not to tell her!”
“Stop making excuses, Tony. You are the adult here. That child is endangering himself and his aunt has a right to know. You are going to talk to him and his aunt, or so help me, I will do it myself!”
For a while there was silence in the room. Maria stole a glance at Howard and he nodded at her. They were of the same mind on this. Good.
“Jesus, 47 years-old and I’m getting scolded by my mom,” Tony muttered.
“Well, when you do stupid things…”
Tony scowled. “For the record, that kid has super strength and super speed and is pretty much super all around.”
“It really doesn’t change a thing, Tony, he’s still a child. Dear god, what were you thinking?”
“Well, you try and stop him then,” he said, somewhat sullenly.
“Oh, I will, make no mistake.” She shook her head. “And everyone knows he’s a minor?”
“I guess.”
“Looks like I’ll be having words will everyone, then.” After another awkward pause, she continued. “But now let’s get some dinner, shall we? I feel like ordering in today.”
Tony, relieved to be let off the hook, jumped at the chance of changing the subject and started suggesting restaurants he liked that they hadn’t tried yet, and they all managed to relax a bit.
*****
Maria woke with a gasp and sat up. The lights came on automatically, though dimmed, and Maria could take him her surroundings. She was in her bedroom in the Tower. In the future. She felt movement at her side and turned to find Howard watching her with a worried expression.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you,” she said.
He shrugged. “I was already awake. Couldn’t really sleep very well either.”
They remained in silence for a few minutes, lost in thought.
“I just…” Maria spoke at last. “I keep seeing it. That man.”
“Yeah…”
After another lengthy silence, she felt him take her hand and squeeze it. Maria sighed and scooted over to his side of the bed, allowing him to embrace her.
“I don’t know what to do,” Howard whispered, a vulnerability in his voice that Maria had rarely heard. “We were… gone… for 30 years. Everything is different now. Everything except us.”
“I think we’re different too,” she replied, thinking of the nightmares of dying she had never experienced before (because she had never died before).
“All I wanted to do with my life… before… it’s… none of it matters anymore. Well, except for getting along with Tony. Everything else… well, Tony kinda did it all. Without me. Without us. I knew he’d be brilliant, but I missed it. I wasn’t there.” We weren’t there, she thought. “And I failed, Maria. Even more than I thought I did.”
“We can’t think like that.” Though she agreed. They had failed their son, in many ways. Some weren’t really their fault, but others… “We’ll drive ourselves crazy if we think like that. We can’t change the past. If we stay stuck in it…” She thought of people still worshiping Captain America and where that had led, with their son bleeding alone in some abandoned building far away. “We need to think about now. What we can do now. Face the future. This future.” The words were to convince herself as much as him. They’d had this same conversation before with roles reversed, and would likely have it again many times before they actually managed to convince themselves.
“Our second chance.”
“Yeah.”
“To do better. Be better. To… try and fix things.”
“Yes.”
There was no sound from the world so high up in the Tower, no one else in the apartment with them. There was only the quiet of the night and the weight of their worries and fears.
“I’m sorry,” Howard eventually said. “I was… I was a jerk sometimes. A lot of times. I... I want to be better.”
He had been a jerk, but it didn’t seem to matter now. She hadn’t been perfect either. They had both made mistakes, and pointing fingers wouldn’t help anything.
“We should do something together. Just the two of us.” Like they had meant to do, before they were killed. The vacation they had never had, but with a new perspective. “We could go out a bit, explore this new New York.” Explore their own relationship and what it could still be.
“Yeah, I’d like that,” he said.
Maria smiled and twisted in his arms to kiss him. It felt like forever since they had really kissed. It wasn’t a passionate kiss – they were rather too worn and weary for that – but it was good, like they were finally back in sync with each other.
“We’re gonna be okay,” she murmured.
“Yeah, we will.”
*****
The apartment was filled with people. Maria and Howard, Tony and the New Avengers, Pepper and Happy (another one of Tony’s friends – and former bodyguard). Even Stephen Strange and his odd cloak were there, as well as Tony’s robots. They had finished arranging all the new furniture to Maria’s satisfaction, getting the place in order, so now they were having a little celebration. An open house of sorts.
Everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves, eating, drinking and talking. Howard was discussing something with Bruce, gesturing animatedly while Happy taught Vision how to mix a (non-alcoholic) cocktail. Pepper and Hope were helping James with the food. Tony was talking with Strange and showing him something in one of his tablets. The bots seemed to be playing fetch with the sentient cloak (it was still strange to her to think of objects as being kind of alive), which was an odd yet endearing sight. It was loud and lively and Maria found herself basking in the good atmosphere. It felt like a million years since she’d been so relaxed, even if she knew it was only a temporary reprieve from the reality of the world she now inhabited.
For now, though, she didn’t want to think about bad things, about pain or betrayal. She wanted to watch the people she cared about – her family, which included new people now – in high spirits. She wanted to see Tony happy and surrounded by friends, to remind herself that despite all he’d been through, he was still strong. To see Howard smile in a way he hadn’t in years, finally able to relax and be the man she had first met all those years ago, smart and funny and full of life. Even if it didn’t last, for now she had this moment, this perfect moment of joy.
She caught her son’s eyes from the other side of the room and smiled. He smiled back and gave her a little wave, eyes bright.
It might take a while, but she (all of them) would be all right.