Chapter Text
There’s a certain calm Takumi finds at target practice, something that’s all-too-often absent from his daily life. Manifesting Fujin Yumi’s bowstring and arrows takes all of his concentration and willpower, so there’s none left for thinking of other, less pleasant things. Things like how just a year ago he was safe at home with his family, and now he’s motherless, following a sister he barely knows and still could never live up to into battle, and forced to cooperate with people who until just now were bent on killing him and the rest of his nation. But with his hands clutching the familiar material of Fujin Yumi, the bitterness and the anxieties fade, his world narrowing to the target far in front of him and the soft “thunk” as his magical arrow hits its mark. He might go so far as to call it peace.
That is, until an unknown hand clasps his shoulder.
Takumi jumps, his hand falling from the bowstring, which disintegrates as he turns to face his visitor. His brow wrinkles in involuntary disgust, the remnant of a lifetime of fear, as he sees that it’s a Nohrian. It’s one of Prince Leo’s retainers, the one with the eyepatch- he thinks his name might begin with an N, but he wouldn’t bet any money on it. What does this man want with him?
The man inclines his head in what could be taken as a bow, but there’s certainly no respect in his one sharp eye. “Prince Takumi. I don’t believe we’ve had the pleasure of being introduced?”
Takumi shakes his head, trying to find something to say other than why are you talking to me? “Um, no, I don’t think so.”
“Niles.” Ah, so that’s his name. “I’m Lord Leo’s retainer. I’ve heard you two have been getting pretty cozy lately?”
Takumi turns red. “I don’t know what you’re implying-”
“Ah, with that pretty little blush of yours, I think you know exactly what I’m implying.” Niles grins, slow and a little predatory.
“-but Prince Leo and I are just friends,” Takumi continues stubbornly. It’s true, although he’s surprised that they’re even that. It turns out, though, that Prince Leo’s a lot like him, and they’ve been nurturing a fragile friendship these past few weeks. It’s almost enough to make Takumi think that Nohrians as a whole aren’t as bad as they’ve been painted.
This particular Nohrian, though…
Takumi’s eyes narrow in annoyance. “If you’re here to, I don’t know, defend his honor, you can turn around right now and leave me in peace. I was practicing.”
Niles smirks. “Trust me, if I were here to defend Lord Leo, you’d be on the ground already. No, today I’m up to something a little more- extracurricular.”
“Extracurricular?” Takumi definitely doesn’t like the sound of that.
“I was wondering if you were up for a competition.”
“A competition?” Takumi’s uncomfortably aware that he sounds like an echo, but he can’t think what else to say. Who does this guy think he is, challenging the second prince of Hoshido? Challenging him to what?
Niles holds up the object he’s been carrying at his side, and Takumi can see now that it’s a bow. “You’re an archer, I’m an archer. I thought we could have a little test of skill.”
“You really think you can beat me?” Maybe he should be exercising a little tact here- he knows too well he’s not unbeatable- but really. Takumi laughs disbelievingly. “You’re on, then.”
“Huh, you’re as arrogant as they say. We’ll see if I can make you eat those words.” Niles gives him a measuring stare and then stretches his arms up into the air, limbering himself up for the contest. Takumi fumes.
They decide on five shots as a fair contest, with the arrows in the target (or the slightly blackened spots where Fujin Yumi’s arrows hit) as the only judges they need. Niles fires a few arrows to warm up, and Takumi finds himself grudgingly impressed by the other man’s form. Clearly he’s practiced a lot, although maybe not as much as Takumi has. This should be an interesting challenge.
Niles fires first, his arrow falling just inside the plate-sized circle that marks the center of the target. Takumi raises an eyebrow. Niles really is better than he expected- although he guesses he should have figured that someone as competent as Prince Leo would have equally competent retainers. Takumi’s own shot is even better, though, hitting nearly at the exact center.
Niles’s second shot lands only inches away from his first, but just outside the center this time. Takumi smirks to himself- Niles has given him an opening. He clears his mind and lets everything else fall away, focusing only on forming his bowstring and arrow-
“You’ve got talented hands, for sure, shooting that well. I’d like to see what else you could do with them.”
Takumi’s concentration snaps in a moment of indignation and his arrow soars wide of the mark, still hitting the target but closer to the edge than the center. “What do you mean by that?!”
“Use your imagination, if you’ve got room for anything besides an ego in that pretty little head of yours.” Niles fires off his third shot with barely any preparation, landing a clean hit to the center of the target.
Takumi feels like he must be burning holes through Niles with his eyes, although Niles doesn’t seem to notice. “I do NOT have an ego, or a ‘pretty little head’!”
Niles raises an eyebrow. “Really? I seem to remember you laughing at the thought of me beating you, and yet here we are. And I’d call myself a pretty good judge of pretty faces, and yours is prettier than most. A shame it’s much more attractive when you’re not talking.”
Fujin Yumi’s string flickers and disappears right as Takumi is about to fire- it’s impossible to concentrate on the target with the rage behind his eyes blurring his vision. The only thing he can really think about is how Niles would look with a few extra holes through him. Focus, he tells himself, clear your mind, don’t give that asshole the satisfaction-
“Of course, I could think of a few ways to fix that. They say gags are the hot new trend nowadays,” Niles continues casually.
“ARGH!” Takumi yells in frustration as the arrow he’s finally managed to conjure up flies wide yet again, barely even clipping the edge of the target this time.
Niles snickers, practically in his ear. “So you’re the type to crack under pressure, huh? What a disappointment. I expected more from a prince of Hoshido. Are all of you like this?”
“HEY.” Takumi was ready to let the gag comment slide if he had to, but if this piece of scum is going to insult him and his family, there’s no way his honor could let him stay silent. “The Hoshidan royal family and our retainers are trained in combat from the finest teachers from the time we start to walk. We don’t need to resort to dirty tricks-” he glares even harder at Niles- “to win.”
“Oh, so it’s just you who’s this pathetic,” Niles responds. He fires off his fourth arrow in the breath between one sentence and the next, hitting the target dead center, and Takumi wonders somewhere beneath the fury that’s consuming his mind whether Niles was purposely shooting less than perfectly earlier just to toy with him. “What must the rest of your family think of you? You’ve had a charmed life, all the advantages in the world, all the training you could ever want, even a magical weapon at your side, and you still can’t beat a one-eyed street rat. If I were them, I’d be ashamed.”
I already KNOW they’re ashamed of me I KNOW I’m the worst of them shut up shut up shut UP- the conscious part of Takumi doesn’t even register that he’s manifested the bowstring until his arm is already drawn back, bow pointing directly at Niles’s chest. “Say that again,” he growls, not even recognizing the sound of his own voice.
The corner of Niles’s mouth twitches up. “Well, I know when I’m not wanted. And I thought we were getting along so well, too. Oh well, I think the contest has already been decided anyway.” He gestures at the target, with Niles’s arrows clustered neatly around the center and Takumi’s scattered scorchmarks.
“What is wrong with you?” Takumi asks, infuriated even more, if it’s possible, by the fact that Niles doesn’t look scared in the slightest, even with an arrow pointing at his heart.
“I could make a list, but it might take me a few weeks to write it all down.” Niles turns on his heel, preparing to leave. “You should probably get back to practicing. You could use it.”
Like hell if Takumi will let this asshole have the last word. “HEY!” he screams after him, dropping Fujin Yumi to his side. “Maybe I am a disappointment, but at least I don’t have to resort to- to tearing other people down to feel better about my pathetic little life!”
Niles stops, turns, and looks back at him with an unreadable expression, but Takumi doesn’t care. He makes his own dramatic exit before Niles can, storming through the small crowd of people that’s gathered to watch them- wait, when did they get here?- and in no particular direction, as long as it’s away. He pauses by a stream just outside camp, splashing his face with water and slowly coming down from his adrenaline high.
He’s starting to get a sickening guilty feeling in his stomach. Gods, he just almost shot a Nohrian, almost completely shattered the fragile peace between the Nohrian and Hoshidan forces that Corrin and his other siblings have been working so hard to strengthen. What would have happened to their battle against a common enemy if a prince of Hoshido had murdered one of the personal retainers of a prince of Nohr? What would have happened to him? And there was a crowd back there- how many of them saw him being totally humiliated and responding by trying to kill his rival?
Takumi puts his face in his hands and groans. Awful as he is, Niles is right about everything, isn’t he? Takumi had cracked ridiculously quickly in the face of Niles’s taunts. His siblings would be ashamed of him- they probably are already, since news travels fast in camp. He’ll never be anything but a disappointment. He squeezes his eyes shut and prays that by the time he gets back to camp, everyone will have forgotten what happened and he won’t have to deal with the aftermath. And while he’s at it, it would be nice if Niles falls into a deep pit while Takumi is away. Maybe one with spikes.
-----
The summons from Ryoma comes not even two hours later. Takumi’s been pacing nervously in his tent for most of that time, waiting for the axe to fall, but it still hurts when he’s called to see his brother so soon. Ryoma’s schedule is incredibly busy most days, planning and advising Corrin as she builds her army. Takumi wonders if he caused such a scene that Ryoma had to clear his schedule just to deal with him. Shame wars with anger within him- he shouldn’t have been so weak, but none of this would have happened in the first place if Niles hadn’t showed up and decided on a whim to emotionally break him.
Ryoma’s sitting when Takumi enters his tent, looking at supply records. He looks up at Takumi, and Takumi feels a hot flush creep onto his cheeks as he bows and sits cross-legged across the table from Ryoma.
“Takumi. I heard what happened.” Ryoma cuts straight to the point as always.
“...I’m sorry, brother. But that Nohrian- he was insulting our family, I had to defend our honor-” Takumi hears his tone of voice as if from outside and cuts himself off. He sounds like a whiny child, trying to get out of trouble because “he started it!” He presses his lips together instead, dreading the inevitable disappointment on Ryoma’s face.
Ryoma sighs, sounding like a concerned father, and it infuriates Takumi and chastises him at the same time. “I understand, I really do. In your situation, I would have been tempted to pull my sword on the man as well. But… Takumi, times aren’t as they were. Nohrians and Hoshidans are working together against a bigger enemy now, and we need every ounce of fellow feeling we can get.” Ryoma doesn’t need to say we don’t need a Hoshidan prince trying to kill a Nohrian royal retainer in broad daylight- Takumi can hear it anyway, and a sullen heat creeps across his ears. “It’s been hard for me to adjust to as well,” Ryoma continues, “but in a situation like this, that fellow feeling is more important even than our personal honor.”
“I know,” Takumi mutters. “I messed up.” He hates being talked to like this, like he’s still a child, but maybe he deserves it when he can’t stop acting like a child.
Ryoma takes a deep breath. “You’re a strong person, brother, but it’s all too easy for you to let your emotions run away with you. I’d like to see you work on keeping them under control, especially in times this tense. I know it’s not easy, but I have faith that you can achieve it.” It hurts to hear, and it hurts even more that Ryoma’s softening it so much, being so gentle about it. Does he think Takumi couldn’t even handle being called a weakling?
“I know,” Takumi repeats. “I’m sorry, Ryoma.” There’s a sick feeling coiled in the pit of his stomach, and he wants nothing more than to be anywhere but here. Well, what he really wants is to be having this conversation with his mother instead of Ryoma. She would know how to help him be less of a failure. But it’s not like that’s possible now. “Is there anything I can do to fix this?” he asks.
“Apologizing to Prince Leo’s retainer would help.”
“No way, I shouldn’t have to-”
There’s that look of slight disappointment he’s been waiting for. Takumi flinches and stops speaking.
“Takumi, as unsatisfying as it is, sometimes it’s important to be the bigger man.”
Takumi bites his lip and looks away. “All right. Fine. I will. Soon.” It galls him as he remembers that infuriating glint in Niles’s eye, how he was practically getting off on humiliating Takumi in public- but Ryoma is still his commander as well as his older brother, even if Corrin is the head of the army, and if being the bigger man will help Hoshido, then he’ll grit his teeth and do it. “I’m sorry I’m such an embarrassment.”
Ryoma’s face darkens with concern. “You’re not an embarrassment, Takumi. Don’t believe that of yourself. You made a mistake, but we’ve all made mistakes before. It’s really all right.”
“Whatever,” Takumi mumbles, suddenly lacking the energy to argue with his brother about this. “I should probably let you get back to work, right? I’m sure you have more important things to be doing.” He stands up quickly, ready to make his escape.
“Well, that was all I wanted to say to you, except-” Ryoma pauses, worry intensifying on his face. “Would you like me to talk to Prince Leo about the behavior of his retainer? You shouldn’t have done what you did, but he should never have been antagonizing you like that. If you’d like, I can have a conversation with Prince Leo about it.”
“It’s fine, I can deal with it myself,” Takumi says quickly, having absolutely no intention to actually deal with it- he’d rather never have to think about Niles again- but just wanting to get out of this conversation as soon as humanly possible.
“Well, all right, if you’re sure, but-”
“I’ll see you later, Ryoma. I promise I’ll apologize to him,” Takumi says, already most of the way to the exit. Maybe it’s rude to leave so quickly, but he can’t take Ryoma’s pity any longer. It’s better that he leave- then neither of them will have to think about this any longer.
-----
Of course, he keeps thinking about it anyway, and it chases him even into his sleep. In his dreams, Niles is there at the archery range, taunting him as he tries in vain to form the bowstring on Fujin Yumi. The bow cuts into his fingers like a sword, his blood dripping onto the dirt below him, and no matter how hard he calls to it, the string refuses to spring into existence.
“Look at you”, the Niles of his dreams drawls, a nasty smile forming on his face. “No wonder even your blessed bow doesn’t want you anymore. Everything you do just makes it more obvious what a pathetic mess you are, don’t you see? It’s a good thing no one gives you any attention as it is- if they saw how you really are, they’d leave even sooner.”
“No, please,” Takumi pleads, struggling with his bow until he feels its sharp edges slice through his own bone, “give me another chance. I can get it, I’m strong enough to wield this, I could beat you any day if you didn’t cheat.”
"As if,” Niles scoffs. “Do you really think you can beat anyone? I could destroy you as easily as- well, as easily as this,” and faster than Takumi can even flinch away, he aims and fires his bow directly at Takumi.
The arrow passes through his eye, and Takumi drops to the ground, screaming, half of his vision exploding into red and then nothingness. He tries desperately to pull the arrow out, clawing at his own eye with ruined fingers that are too close to severed to respond to any of his commands. And Niles stands over him, laughing and laughing.
“It really is too bad to destroy that pretty face,” he comments, crouching down and cupping Takumi’s face in his hand, blood streaming down his arm from Takumi’s eye socket. “But I guess the world isn’t losing much, after all.”
Takumi wakes with a faint scream, burying his head in his pillow to try to muffle the sounds once he realizes what’s going on. He’s thankful that his retainers don’t sleep close enough to him to be woken up by the noises he makes in his sleep- he doesn’t want to bother anyone else with them, especially not as frequently as they happen. (The only person he ever would bother was Mikoto, sometimes, after a particularly bad one, but… well. Not anymore.) He lies stiff on his futon for a few minutes, trying to shake off the phantom pain in his eye and the still-too-clear images from the dream so he can get back to sleep, then sighs in disgust and gives up. Clearly, sleep’s not coming for a while. He’ll have to get by on a little less sleep today; it’s far from the first time, and he’s more or less learned to deal with it.
He goes for a walk instead of sleeping, patrolling the perimeter of the camp. Everything looks reassuringly peaceful in the moonlight, and the world is sleeping save the few guards who are meant to be on patrol. The peace helps to remind him that his dream was only a dream, as horrible as it was- Fujin Yumi hasn’t deserted him (not yet, anyway) and he’s still got his eye and all his fingers in working order.
As he passes near a small clearing at the edge of the camp, Takumi is surprised to see a figure sitting there, staring up at the sky. Who else could possibly be up at this time? It’s long after midnight yet so far before dawn that even those who like to get their days started early should still be asleep. Takumi approaches whoever it is, curious and wondering if maybe a little human company might chase away the shreds of the nightmare. Then the figure comes into focus. Takumi sees a head of white hair, turned away from him and nearly glowing in the moonlight, and an adventurer’s cloak. It’s him. He pauses, hovering on the edge of the clearing. He’d promised Ryoma that he would apologize, and maybe now would be a good time- at least they’d be guaranteed not to have anyone else run into them and cause an awkward scene. But just as he makes up his mind to approach, the voice of the dream Niles echoes in his head, and the phantom pain stabs his eye socket where Niles’s arrow passed through it.
Takumi turns on his heel and walks away, trying not to run. It can wait.