Chapter Text
“Is it over yet?”
“Can’t say for sure, though it has been mighty quiet out there for a while.”
“Best we wait out here a little longer, then.”
Miranda fumed, glaring at the two women sitting at her desk. “You know, the Normandy’s a big ship. You could have chosen other places to hide if you didn’t want to take part in the festivities."
“Are you kidding?” Kasumi turned to her with a sly grin. “This is about the safest place on the Normandy there is. Everyone knows you wouldn’t involve yourself in things like that so no one would come in here. And, you’re too stiff to try to pull anything on us yourself.”
“I must say, Kasumi, I thought you’d have a field day being out there and setting up booby traps all over the place. I’m surprised,” Kelly admitted, tilting her head at the thief curiously. Kasumi patted her on the arm.
“Contingency plans, Kelly,” said the thief with a dramatic sweep of her hand. “If I went out there, I’d be both the prime target and suspect for everything. Not a pretty situation if the ones accusing you are a tank-bred krogan, an insanely powerful biotic, Commander Fucking Shepard, a master assassin, a justicar–“
“Okay, okay, I get it!” Kelly laughed, settling deeper into her chair.
Smiling, the hooded woman poked her companion lightly. “And I must say myself, that was pretty intelligent of you, Kelly. Getting us to wear raincoats and open up umbrellas indoors was a great idea – even if we did end up looking a little silly.”
Returning the smile, Kelly responded, “As you said, contingency plans. Since Joker would undoubtedly get EDI on his side, he’d effectively have access to the functions of the entire ship. It only made sense that he would go for the fire extinguishers.”
“While this all nice and perfectly peachy, can you two please get out, now? I have work I need to do and I doubt that the childish jokes could have gone on for the entire day–“
“Aw, but Miranda, you’re not going to toss us out, are you?” cooed Kasumi as she gave the XO a sidelong grin. “You’re way too nice for that.”
“Oh, I’m nice, all right,” said Miranda, walking over and plopping down on her usual seat to start up her terminal. “Nice enough to let the commander’s space hamster out to stretch its little legs for a while.”
Frowning a little, Kasumi asked, “What do you–“
“Boo!” Kelly exclaimed suddenly at the direction of the floor at her feet, and Kasumi’s blood ran cold at the dreaded name. “What are you doing here, little guy?”
“SQUEEK!”
“RATS!” shrieked Kasumi, and she was on her feet and out of the room faster than Mordin could say ‘scale itch’.
Staring after her through the open door, Kelly muttered, “That wasn’t very nice, Miranda.”
Typing calmly away, Miranda merely replied, “At least she can’t say I’m stiff anymore.”